The Instigator
Con (against)
0 Points
The Contender
Pro (for)
5 Points

Arrange Marriage(PRO) Vs Love marriage (CON)

Do you like this debate?NoYes+1
Add this debate to Google Add this debate to Delicious Add this debate to FaceBook Add this debate to Digg  
Post Voting Period
The voting period for this debate has ended.
after 1 vote the winner is...
Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 1/5/2014 Category: Society
Updated: 3 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 10,245 times Debate No: 43424
Debate Rounds (3)
Comments (9)
Votes (1)




Marriage is a sacred bond which not only involves the couple but also the two families of the bride and the bridegroom respectively. Be it arrange marriage or love marriage, marriage is nothing different for both. Love marriage vs arrange marriage is just a question prevalent in minds of married couples who are not satisfied or are scared to live with an unknown partner for whole life.


1.Common myth about love marriage:- There is always a thought in mind that love marriages don't last much, But it is nothing related to the marriage type when it comes to knowing each other and understanding levels. The understanding can be built if you have faith and trust apart from flexibility among the couple.

2.Better Understanding :- In love marriages, generally couple have better understanding and bonding towards each-other, because of this reason, many arrange marriage couples feel the lack of time duration which forms a base for developing understanding levels.

3.No trust issues in Love marriage :- In love marriages, couple generally dont have trust issues with his/her partner because of their love-affair before marriage.

now i would like to hear points fro PRO side first then I will pass my argument against pro.



Thank you Con for starting this debate. I hope we will able to have a wonderful one.

Since Con has not clearly defined the purpose of this debate, I will assume that this debate will be arguing which type of marriage is better, judging from Con's arguments. Marriage will not be the ceremony itself, but the time the couple spent together as a married couple. I will be arguing that arranged marriage is better in more aspects than marriage from love.

First of all, I would like to point out that Con has plagiarised as he has not listed his sources. His beginning paragraph, "marriage is a sacred bond...", was copied off from:

Con also shares the burden of evidence, as if his claims are not supported by factual proof, they will be deemed opinions.

Definition of arranged marriage
According to Oxford dictionaries, arranged marriage is:

"A marriage planned and agreed by the families or guardians of the couple concerned.[2]"

Arranged marriage is not forced marriage, which is defined as:

"A forced marriage takes place when the (spouse(s)) do not want to get married but are forced to by others, usually their families. [3]"

Therefore, arranged marriage couples have the freedom to divorce if they feel uncomfortable.

Proceeding onto the debate, I would like to begin by rebutting Con's arguments.

1. Myth about love marriage

The actions of maintaining a love marriage is by the couple themselves, there is no definite yes they will commit it.

A study by Dr Robert Epstein [4] show that arranged marriage couple's love will grow stronger as love marriage couple's love will weaken.

2. Better understanding

Although there may be little time to understand before marriage for arranged marriage couples, they will receive time afterwards to understand each other more.

If they feel they are not bonding with each other via understanding, they are free to divorce.

3. Trust issues

Con states that "couple generally dont have trust issues with his/her partner because of their love-affair before marriage", which is true, as the couple has spent time together beforehand, to develop trustful connection. Con states there are "no truse issues in Love marriage" which is false, as if there were none, there would be no divorces, fights and family issues.

Arranged marriages are also allowed to meet up with their future spouses beforehand to bond more whilst their parents see if they are suitable with each other. [1] If they are not, they are not required to marry.

The difference between love and arranged marriages is that their trust is gained at different times, but they will still gain trust in the future.

Due to character limit, I will present my points in R2. I wish Con the best of luck.

[4] How Love Emerges in Arranged Marriages (book)
Debate Round No. 1


Well done Pro for such a good argument , although you haven't stated your own points first but well you have nicely contradicted my points.


1.Pro has stated that "arranged marriage couples have the freedom to divorce if they feel uncomfortable."
then, its consequences of divorce would be that both of them would be regretting whole life for that mistake and they would always put blame on their parents and on relatives. Whereas, on the other side, in love marriages , there is no such issue to blame parents and relatives , in love marriages couple are themselves responsible for the marriage.

2. Pro has stated that "Arranged marriages are also allowed to meet up with their future spouses beforehand to bond more whilst their parents see if they are suitable with each other".
This point of con is somehow baseless, because that time is generally not enough for a person to commit to his/her partner for lifetime and also one cannot predict or judge the behaviour of the other person from mere two or three meetings or dates because both of them would have been posing out their best behaviour in front of each other..

According to me in various arranged marriages, couple don't realize at first that they aren't fit or suitable for each other or their behaviour doesn't match at all but after marriage they keep on recreating for their mistake and this regret lasts forever.

So as my conclusion for this round is Love marriages are better in the sense that there is freedom of choice in choosing one's partner and the individual is responsible for the consequences, good or bad that a love marriage can have. The partners also know and accept each other irrespective of their shortcomings or bad habits. There is perfect bonding of the souls, hence the secret of stability.

Best Of luck Pro.


1. Con states that “in love marriages , there is no such issue to blame parents and relatives”, which is untrue as in some situations, families place pressure on their child by not accepting their future child-in-law, causing issues. Regret and blame occurs to all divorcees, it is not an exclusive burden for arranged marriage couples.

2. “Bond more” does not mean that they would be certain they have no issues with each other, it means that they are less of a stranger and more understanding. Con seems to misunderstand me, my claim is that they have some bonding not that they have enough to be completely certain.

Every parent has different judgment, and their decision may result in good or bad, similar to the decision of love couples. Both marriages have the same consequences, and the same severities. It is not forced marriage, arranged marriage couples are still free to break off the marriage if they do not feel ready yet, thus, there would be no divorce issues.

Con has presented some evidence, however it is baseless as it is his own personal opinion and cannot be counted as a trusted source.

First, I would define the word child using Oxford Dictionary before beginning my arguments.

“A son or daughter of any age.”

1. Better future

In various cases of love marriages family of the spouses may not accept their child-in-law, distancing themselves from their child or even disowning them. This causes a high risk of issues occurring such as financial, mental and work support which eventually breaks the marriage apart.

Arranged marriage is considered a family affair in countries such as India, and offers family support to help the couple have an easier future together. They make sure that their children have financial security as well as other factors of a lasting relationship.

Both families will have to come to agreement to the marriage which means that both sides have accepted their future child-in-law.

2. Love comes

The difference between love and arranged marriage is that their trust, understanding and love come in different times. Whilst love couples have more time to bond before marriage, arranged marriage couples use their early years to bond more.

Research shows that arranged marriages usually love more as time passes, as well as their love turning twice as strong in ten years whilst love marriages love less. This may be due to love marriages usually being blinded by love whilst arranged marriages are carefully considered.

3. She/he has a choice too

It is a belif that the child has no choice in arranged marriages. Whilst they are limited to what they parents choose for them, they are free to accept or deny the suitor if they wish.

In India, there is a tradition known as Swayamvar which the bride is free to choose her spouse from list. There are also marriage bureaus and groups which can provide help.

This limits the chance of a future of bad marriage.

Thank you Con for your points and I look forward to your next one. Sources in comments due to limit.

Debate Round No. 2


As it is already cleared from Pro argument that her points are not so convincing.


:-I Always support love marriage as,it does not has risk how our partner will be because we know each other.where as arrange marriages has chances of partner being good or worse.Marriage should be done on the basis of love NOT on the basis of caste.

Still dowry system is there in India because of arrange marriage.Many women's are tortured and killed to death every year in India. Ones parents as well as society should understand this fact too,that there is marriage between 2 soulmate,not between 2 caste,and what marriage has to do with caste for whole life. It is "Us" the new generation who has to change this system and make our elders understand that there is nothing wrong in Love marriage'.

As already discussed in previous rounds, there is not much to argue for here in this debate now , I am done in this debate now. I just wanted to SAY that LOVE IS MOST Important in this world, so SUpport Love marriages.

All The best PRO for your round ...:)..:)


Thank you for your points Con. Since this is the final round, I will only refute.

Con has decided my points are “not convincing” and has made no attempt to refute them, therefore he has not evidence that they are “not convincing” and that they are false.

In Con’s point 1, Con states that:

“love marriage as, it does not has risk how our partner will be because we know each other” which is false has couples are usually blinded by love to see how their partner truly is. If Con’s logic is true, then love marriage couples would not have divorces, violence, abuse, fights and such. His logic is invalid because those issues exist in society.

Love marriage and arranged marriage have the risk of having a good or bad partner, it is not a exclusive burden for arranged marriages. Con seems to continuously place exclusive burderns on arranged marriage couples when in reality, both marriages have them.

In arranged marriage, the risk factor of redeeming a good spouse is less than love marriage as both family and child work together to judge carefully, as well as marriage bureaus and groups that can help. Compared to love marriage which is usually decided by two people, arranged marriage has much more careful judgment and consideration. As well as that, arranged marriage couples have a more secure future than love couples as they have family backing them up.

Whether marriage began with decisions or a meeting – both marriages will still redeem love if both partners commit to it. My points in R2 explain about a study about love in both marriages, which arranged marriage’s love is actually stronger than love marriages.

Reffering to Con’s point 2.

Although dowry was an innocent tradition in the past which was used to financially support for the future couple, in present, dowry is banned by law in India and not all arranged marriages has dowry within it. [1]

Dowry issues would not be solved with everyone going to love marriage – it would be solved if females were allowed proper education to get a job and become financially secure. This would also benefit her if she were to live her life independently. [1]

Rich and middle classes are usually fine for giving gifts or dowries (usually the male(‘s family) doing so), however, the poor usually cannot which results in the female child not getting married. [1]

Arranged marriage getting removed will NOT solve dowry issues.

I support love marriages, however, I decided to argue against my beliefs in attempt to extend my debating skills and see another view. I thank Con for this wonderful debate and wish him the best in future debates.

Debate Round No. 3
9 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 9 records.
Posted by BiggBoss 3 years ago
@Silhouette :- thankyuuuu very much for this awsome debate..:)
Posted by Silhouette 3 years ago
Thank you for the good luck varun.vow! :)
Posted by Silhouette 3 years ago

Thank you very much for giving me time so I can post my debate, I appreciate it :) No, thank you to YOU. Thank you for the request but currently, I'm not adding friends but when I am, I'll see if I can add you. :)

To clear things up - I support love marriage more than arranged marriage - I just wanted to see it from another side so I debated against my beliefs.

Anyways, thank you very much for the wonderful debate! You were great! I hope we can do so again, I'm so glad there were no forfeits :)
Posted by varun.vow 3 years ago
Superb arguments from CON SIDE,,, wonderful of luck to both of them..
Posted by BiggBoss 3 years ago
Silhouette, njoy tomorrow , i will wait for your argument uptil day after tomorrow, i have decided to post my argument tomorrow, so that you will also manage to post your's .
Thankyou Silhouette .. :)
i also wanted to ask you smthing that add me as your friend :)
Posted by Silhouette 3 years ago

Evidence for:

Family support, financial security, child's choice of choosing, both families accepting and more.


Evidence for:

Research shows that arranged marriages usually love more as time passes, as well as their love turning twice as strong in ten years whilst love marriages love less. This may be due to love marriages usually being blinded by love whilst arranged marriages are carefully considered.

Due to character limit, I was unable to insert reference points. I apoligise for that.

Got it, thanks for clearing that up :)

I may not have enough time to write my debate tomorrow due to a family celebration. I apoligise for that and if I do forfeit, please alert the others on the debate. I'll leave my final debate on the comments section. I hope that is fine for you, thanks!
Posted by BiggBoss 3 years ago
In second last paragraph, instead of recreating , it is REGRETTING.
Posted by Silhouette 3 years ago
BiggBoss, I apoligise for not stating my points first. I just reliased after submitting my argument that I was meant to state my points than rebutt. Sorry about that.
Posted by whatledge 3 years ago
Not interested enough to debate this, but arranged marriage and love marriage are not mutually exclusive. Often enough, the two people "arranged" to be married have long since been considered to be in love within the community and the "arrangement" is more or less just a formality. Same with the "bride kidnappings" in some countries, where they fake a kidnapping as part of tradition/formality. So perhaps a little specification might be needed in the resolution, as I think not all arranged marriages are alike, just as not all "love" marriages are the same.
1 votes has been placed for this debate.
Vote Placed by EndarkenedRationalist 3 years ago
Agreed with before the debate:--Vote Checkmark0 points
Agreed with after the debate:--Vote Checkmark0 points
Who had better conduct:--Vote Checkmark1 point
Had better spelling and grammar:--Vote Checkmark1 point
Made more convincing arguments:-Vote Checkmark-3 points
Used the most reliable sources:-Vote Checkmark-2 points
Total points awarded:05 
Reasons for voting decision: PRO constructed stronger arguments and refuted all of CON's points, either outright or with examples demonstrating that the burden was shared by both types. In the last round, CON didn't refute any of PRO's points. PRO claimed CON plagarised, and CON never defended, so sources go to PRO. Conduct is tied because PRO put sources in the comments and CON had no reliable ones. S&G were even. Nice debate, you two!