The Instigator
Rob1Billion
Pro (for)
Winning
30 Points
The Contender
birdman3377
Con (against)
Losing
28 Points

Birdman is clearly inferior to Rob1billion

Do you like this debate?NoYes+3
Add this debate to Google Add this debate to Delicious Add this debate to FaceBook Add this debate to Digg  
Vote Here
Pro Tied Con
Who did you agree with before the debate?
Who did you agree with after the debate?
Who had better conduct?
Who had better spelling and grammar?
Who made more convincing arguments?
Who used the most reliable sources?
Reasons for your voting decision
1,000 Characters Remaining
The voting period for this debate does not end.
Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 11/4/2009 Category: Society
Updated: 7 years ago Status: Voting Period
Viewed: 1,301 times Debate No: 9924
Debate Rounds (3)
Comments (8)
Votes (9)

 

Rob1Billion

Pro

The purpose of this debate is to haze this newcomer. I consider him my intellectual inferior, and will provide evidence to support this. Here is why I am better than Birdman:

Contention 1: Birdman is is well-behind in his organic chemistry studies, and will most likely fail the class (or pass with a mediocre grade). This is because he is too busy eating sushi at Little Tokyo all the time and is not smart enough to realize he should be studying. I, on the other hand, take my classes somewhat seriously, most of the time.

Contention 2: Birdman cannot beat me, most of the time, in tennis matches. The only reason he took me in 3 straight basketball games yesterday was because I clearly wasn't feeling well, and had a sore throat. Also, he showed up 45 minutes later than he said he would in an evil attempt to make me use the little energy I had before he got there.

Contention 3: Birdman's guitar skills are sub-par. Can he even pull off a C-chord without having to squint his eyes at the instrument and fumble around with it for several seconds before sounding out the chord? I doubt it.

Contention 4: listen to him sing:

now listen to mine:
birdman3377

Con

How shall I proceed?

My wet, sweaty palms and their nood-ly weak grip firmly accept this so-called challenge. But rather than shake your hand and bend over, I will fight for what I believe is right!! Who are you to haze and belittle? Screw the purpose of your debate. If embarrassment is desired, embarrassment you shall have!

As far as intellect is concerned, I have no qualms debunking, disproving and circumventing every contention provided by this self proclaimed seasoned pro. In advance, I apologize to anybody following along. There will be moments where I will have to stoop to my opponents level. At times it will be vulgar and unpleasant, dirty and obscene. These are the consequences of a battle that must be won at all costs. I have come prepared. But is Rob prepared?

Speaking of preparation, I must prepare my body for the world. I must wash the soil from my being, much like I am about to wash Rob's sad proclamations from everybody's memory. I must ready the ship for launch and set the table for dinner. Hey Rob, are those the only contentions hiding in your cheap bag of tricks? Is this all I have to look forward to? I'll spot you a round. Let you layer these arguments a lil' better. I will debunk these attacks on my school progress, tennis ability / basketball greatness, and guitar/ vocal abilities in due time. I feel no hurry or sense of urgency. I'm giddy like a schoolgirl. My metaphorical hymen is still intact, and I want to savor the moment. Prepare yourself Mr. ROB, because I have been preparing for this moment my entire life...
Debate Round No. 1
Rob1Billion

Pro

The only thing you have been preparing for your entire life is the beat-down of the century.

Contention 5: Birdman has not the gaul to put his preferences on display, on the major issues, on his profile. Why is this? What is he hiding? Is he afraid of the impending challenges to his pride? If your pride is what you are defending, Birdman, then realize that you have little to be proud of anyway.

Contention 6: Birdman wears stupid tennis headbands all the time, for NO REASON. If I had some pictures I would show them, but my camera is pretty nice and I didn't want to risk the structural integrity of the lens by focusing it on birdman's face. If you invite him to the bar, he will show up wearing this headband and embarass you. Who does he think he is?

Contention 7: Birdman got totally punked at the bar 2 months ago, while trying to pick up a prostitute. As he sat there trying to make idle conversation with this girl, my friend Jared stepped in and inquired whether she wanted to talk to a real man or not. She said yes, which meant that Birdman was no longer on the guest list for her services. Birdman sat there for another 15 minutes or so while Jared stood between their respective barstools, suffering utter humiliation while crying into his beer all the while. When I came inside with the meat circus, and tried to introduce Birdman to the crowd, they showed genuine disinterest in him and would not even shake his hand without turning their heads in disapproval. They could smell fear and disingenuity in the air, and saw Birdman's tiny trembling frame in the corner, shaking with the squeamishness of a young insecure schoolgirl.

Contention 8: When playing teams tennis (and losing as usual), Birdman yells his signature cry "FIGHT TO DUECE" to try and boost his teammate's morale. He still usually loses.
birdman3377

Con

OMG!!

WTF!!

:o

Contention 1: Rob could not handle Chemistry 2, so why criticize me? (I received an AB) I am as serious about my studies as Rob was when he found out rabies can be aspirated. (hilarious story...maybe Rob would tell it if it did not make him sound so...haha...whats the word...RIDICULOUS!!!)
>o

Contention 2: Physically, Rob and myself are very fit individuals. I attend the gym three times a week and keep a pretty good regimen of weight and cardiovascular training. Rob likes to attend Taco Burrito three times a week and keep a pretty good regimen of wipe and flush. ("that green sauce is amazing!")

I can, have, and always will be superior to Rob in tennis. I wear the matching headband. I have the better serve. I am quick like a bunny. Rob has to spend every other point looking for a hair tie. Rob has no idea how many points I give him every match. Want proof? C'mon Rob...let's set up a match and put money on it. Name the location and time so everybody can attend this massacre. (Get the EMT on standby.)

Oh yeah, I am the EMT! After the smack down, I'll make sure to bring all the necessary equipment. Once I'm through, Rob's gonna have more than a hurt ego...

Contention 3: My guitar skills ARE sub-par and that is the way I like it. I play because I enjoy it, nothing more and nothing less.

I'm playing the race card and am calling this contention RASCIST!! I am part ASIAN!! I'm always SQUINTING!!!! Does this mean I'm intellectually inferior to ROB?

This contention lacks logic.

Contention 4: Well played Rob, well played. My singing is hilarious and downright offensive! Isn't it obvious that I was doing this for entertainment purposes? I suppose my singing is pretty bad. Unfortunately, like the previous contention, my singing has nothing to do with my intellect as compared to Rob.

Hey Rob, must I reiterate the meaning of the word intellect? It is the faculty of thinking and acquiring knowledge, something I have been actively engaging in for my entire life. The proof is in the pudding my fine sir. Grab your dictionary, consult your girlfriend, and try to learn something. Because I am learning you an @ss-whoopin!!

Perhaps, in light of this new definition of intellect, Rob would like to revise his next three contentions?
Debate Round No. 2
Rob1Billion

Pro

Thank you for leaving out the visceral analogies this time around.

Contention 1: I received an F in chem 2. But I was savvy (and heady) enough to officially have that grade removed from my transcript. Since I am not a chemist, my grade is irrelevent. I have been on the dean's list the past three semesters since. The rabies story (as well as the train story) can be saved for another time, thank you.

Contention 2: Taco Burrito helps clean the digestive tract, as Con alluded to. I have a strict regimen of hot sauce and tequila that keep my pipes cleaner than stainless steel. Also, I'm the one who introduced Birdman to running and tennis, so his impudence towards his mentor is greatly unappreciated.

Birdman's overhand shot really is no match for mine on the tennis court, and the statistics attest to that. He is full of bologna up to his neck.

Contention 3: No, your not playing the race card. I already have; you simply weren't smart enough to recognize it. Birdman is a self-proclaimed "asian-caucasion". All the mercury from the sushi he is eating is building up in his brain.

"This contention lacks logic".

What the hell are you talking about? Your own contention? I said your guitar skills were mediocre and you agreed with me!

Unfortunately, Con has failed to address 2 out of my last three contentions and they will need to be extended. He is a newbie, so he hasn't yet learned that when you don't address someone's arguments it makes you look like a fool. That's alright Mike, better I do it than some random debater out to make an easy meal out of you.

I'd like to end this round by saying that I would like to thank Con for showing up today, despite his lack of experience and tact. Although he performed horribly, both hor himself and for his asian race, he showed us all that debating Rob1billion isn't something to be taken lightly.
birdman3377

Con

Contention 1: Is a grade ever irrelevant? Just because a grade is removed from a transcript does not absolve the fact that I aced a class that Rob failed.

Contention 2: Rob did not introduce me to tennis and running. I had been doing both for years on a regular basis.

And to what statistics is Rob referring to? I agree, Rob has a good overhand and slice, but my serve is clearly superior. This is why I have challenged Rob to a game for all the marbles, only then can this contention be settled.

Contention 3: Robs response in round 3 still does not make sense to anyone except Rob.

True, Rob is better with a guitar than I am. The difference is due to experience rather than skill. Rob has been playing guitar for over a decade whereas I have only recently picked up the instrument as a hobby. Allow me ten years Rob, then we will see who is better with their fingers!

Contention 4: Reiterating my previous argument, the intention of the voice mail posted of my singing was meant as a joke and nothing more. My hilarious singing is far more interesting than Rob's blase, lukewarm version of a weak song. Did anyone happen to notice I was singing John Frusciante? At least I have better taste in music...

Contention 5: This profile is still fairly new. Instead of blowing my load in 2 minutes like Rob, I prefer to take my time and carefully consider the information I put on public display. In due time, many interesting talking points as well as personal information will surface. Patience my man...lets enjoy it one day at a time.

Contention 6: I love wearing headbands, bandannas, and crazy outfits. It is part of my punky and outgoing attitude. It's an easy icebreaker with the ladies and makes me more approachable to the world. If we can't play with our image, what can we play with?

Hey Rob, since when is embarrassment part of the equation. 90% of the time Rob looks as goofy as I do, who is he to judge?

Contention 7: Horrible story told in horrible fashion. Any shred of truth to this story is lost in all the wild exaggerations and horrible sentence structure. If a story is to be told Rob, at least make it believable and somewhat entertaining. This story cannot come close to the hilarity of the rabies story that I suddenly feel compelled to tell.

This story is based on first hand accounts as told to me by Rob's roommate (Jason), live-in girlfriend (Tiffany), and girlfriends live-in little sister(Francis). The giddiness with which this story was told to me was palpable. I knew from the beginning this was going to be a source of laughter for weeks, and it surely did not disappoint.

"Oh my God! Ahhhhhh! Get it out! Get it out!"

Wham! Splat!

The bat that flew in the house never knew what hit it. Jason put the tennis racket down and proceeded to toss the bat outside.

Here Rob comes to save the day!

Feelings of remorse shook Rob's entire body from the top of his head to the bottom of his hippy hair. How could Jason abuse one of nature's creatures in such an inhumane fashion? Surely the bat might still be okay, if swift action is taken.

So Rob proceeded to retrieve the stunned bat and lay it out on the kitchen table. How he thought he was helpiing the poor animal we will never know. But in typical Rob fashion, his feelings of compassion quickly turned into a means of entertainment. Pulling his camera out, Rob decided to make a home video starring himself and this stunned bat. The video is complete with shots of Rob's face literally millimeters from the bat's own, scrunching and making faces that were surely meant to mimic the pug-nosed member sprawled out on the table. (I never did ask what he ended up doing with the bat.)

What if the bat has rabies? Apparently, Rob thought he was safe since the bat never actually made contact with an open wound or broken skin. Boy was he wrong! After many conversations, Rob began researching rabies online and discovered that rabies could be aspirated. The seed of doubt had been planted.

For the next week, all I heard about were pleas for advice. Could Rob have rabies? What should Rob do? Indecision, nervousness, and anxiety became a daily part of Rob's life as he wrestled with his inner demons. Was he in danger of death and paralysis. Could he take the chance and wait?

Uninsured and in the dumps, Rob looked to me for reinforcement. Thousands of dollars were hanging in the balance. Let us keep in mind that Rob is not exactly rolling in the dough. A few thousand dollars of debt is enough to make life that much more difficult for our struggling musician. Was he willing to accept the consequences of his boneheaded mockery of a poor wounded animal?

After a series of three belly shots, two thousand dollars of debt, and a testament to Rob's own ability to give the world yet another laugh, Rob is happily rabies free. For now...

Contention 8: Back to tennis eh? It is true, I love rallying back from near defeat to total victory. My tenacity and trademark call "Fight to deuce!" is yet another example of my competitiveness. Rob's assertion of my continual defeat is drastically overemphasized. I lose no more in doubles tennis than anyone else. I am a great doubles tennis player.

As the con, I have surely enjoyed this debate. Rob's delusional assertion of my inferiority is clearly undeserved and I am confident that the votes will back this up. I will save everyone from rehashing the ridiculous contentions hurled at my character throughout this debate and close with a smile and a handshake.

I appreciate everybody paying attention to my first debate and I guarantee there will be many more to come.
Debate Round No. 3
8 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 8 records.
Posted by birdman3377 7 years ago
birdman3377
I don't blame her...he looks like a male whore himself...

The meat bus rides on!!!
Posted by Rob1Billion 7 years ago
Rob1Billion
http://i201.photobucket.com...

No this is guy she was into! I hope this doesn't bring back bad memories of getting punked...
Posted by birdman3377 7 years ago
birdman3377
that prostitute was totally into me!!!
Posted by rainydaywoman85 7 years ago
rainydaywoman85
...I like the headbands, but i may have bias. However, you were docked points for the prostitute...hahaa
Posted by birdman3377 7 years ago
birdman3377
guaranteed laughs...
Posted by birdman3377 7 years ago
birdman3377
Wow...I know our debate lacks substance but I guarantee it is the most entertaining debate this side of the country...

Where the peoples at?

VOTE!!!
Posted by Rob1Billion 7 years ago
Rob1Billion
Carulli: "Andante"
Posted by Rob1Billion 7 years ago
Rob1Billion
Not sure why both those videos got cut short. I'm not good with video stuffs.
9 votes have been placed for this debate. Showing 1 through 9 records.
Vote Placed by Atheism 6 years ago
Atheism
Rob1Billionbirdman3377Tied
Agreed with before the debate:--Vote Checkmark0 points
Agreed with after the debate:--Vote Checkmark0 points
Who had better conduct:Vote Checkmark--1 point
Had better spelling and grammar:Vote Checkmark--1 point
Made more convincing arguments:Vote Checkmark--3 points
Used the most reliable sources:Vote Checkmark--2 points
Total points awarded:70 
Vote Placed by jat93 6 years ago
jat93
Rob1Billionbirdman3377Tied
Agreed with before the debate:--Vote Checkmark0 points
Agreed with after the debate:--Vote Checkmark0 points
Who had better conduct:-Vote Checkmark-1 point
Had better spelling and grammar:-Vote Checkmark-1 point
Made more convincing arguments:-Vote Checkmark-3 points
Used the most reliable sources:-Vote Checkmark-2 points
Total points awarded:07 
Vote Placed by jarheadr176 6 years ago
jarheadr176
Rob1Billionbirdman3377Tied
Agreed with before the debate:-Vote Checkmark-0 points
Agreed with after the debate:-Vote Checkmark-0 points
Who had better conduct:-Vote Checkmark-1 point
Had better spelling and grammar:-Vote Checkmark-1 point
Made more convincing arguments:-Vote Checkmark-3 points
Used the most reliable sources:-Vote Checkmark-2 points
Total points awarded:07 
Vote Placed by dogparktom 7 years ago
dogparktom
Rob1Billionbirdman3377Tied
Agreed with before the debate:Vote Checkmark--0 points
Agreed with after the debate:Vote Checkmark--0 points
Who had better conduct:Vote Checkmark--1 point
Had better spelling and grammar:Vote Checkmark--1 point
Made more convincing arguments:Vote Checkmark--3 points
Used the most reliable sources:Vote Checkmark--2 points
Total points awarded:70 
Vote Placed by rainydaywoman85 7 years ago
rainydaywoman85
Rob1Billionbirdman3377Tied
Agreed with before the debate:-Vote Checkmark-0 points
Agreed with after the debate:-Vote Checkmark-0 points
Who had better conduct:--Vote Checkmark1 point
Had better spelling and grammar:--Vote Checkmark1 point
Made more convincing arguments:--Vote Checkmark3 points
Used the most reliable sources:Vote Checkmark--2 points
Total points awarded:20 
Vote Placed by oceanix 7 years ago
oceanix
Rob1Billionbirdman3377Tied
Agreed with before the debate:--Vote Checkmark0 points
Agreed with after the debate:Vote Checkmark--0 points
Who had better conduct:Vote Checkmark--1 point
Had better spelling and grammar:Vote Checkmark--1 point
Made more convincing arguments:Vote Checkmark--3 points
Used the most reliable sources:Vote Checkmark--2 points
Total points awarded:70 
Vote Placed by Nails 7 years ago
Nails
Rob1Billionbirdman3377Tied
Agreed with before the debate:--Vote Checkmark0 points
Agreed with after the debate:--Vote Checkmark0 points
Who had better conduct:-Vote Checkmark-1 point
Had better spelling and grammar:-Vote Checkmark-1 point
Made more convincing arguments:-Vote Checkmark-3 points
Used the most reliable sources:-Vote Checkmark-2 points
Total points awarded:07 
Vote Placed by Rob1Billion 7 years ago
Rob1Billion
Rob1Billionbirdman3377Tied
Agreed with before the debate:Vote Checkmark--0 points
Agreed with after the debate:Vote Checkmark--0 points
Who had better conduct:Vote Checkmark--1 point
Had better spelling and grammar:Vote Checkmark--1 point
Made more convincing arguments:Vote Checkmark--3 points
Used the most reliable sources:Vote Checkmark--2 points
Total points awarded:70 
Vote Placed by birdman3377 7 years ago
birdman3377
Rob1Billionbirdman3377Tied
Agreed with before the debate:--Vote Checkmark0 points
Agreed with after the debate:-Vote Checkmark-0 points
Who had better conduct:-Vote Checkmark-1 point
Had better spelling and grammar:-Vote Checkmark-1 point
Made more convincing arguments:-Vote Checkmark-3 points
Used the most reliable sources:-Vote Checkmark-2 points
Total points awarded:07