The Instigator
cheesedingo1
Pro (for)
Winning
9 Points
The Contender
lannan13
Con (against)
Losing
0 Points

CHEESEDINGO1'S TROLL TOURNEY: Chickens are Superior To Humans

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Post Voting Period
The voting period for this debate has ended.
after 2 votes the winner is...
cheesedingo1
Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 4/25/2012 Category: Politics
Updated: 4 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 2,086 times Debate No: 23161
Debate Rounds (4)
Comments (3)
Votes (2)

 

cheesedingo1

Pro

CHEESEDINGO1'S TROLL TOURNAMENT ROUND 1:

Cheesedingo v.s. lannan13

Topic: Chickens are superior to humans.

Perimeters:

1) Alaska is a place of Tortilla chips and Polar Bears.

2) Chickens and roosters are the same except for their sex.

3) The friendzone exists. (meaning one that is trapped in a relationship where they are only regarded as a friend when they want an actual realationship).




THAT IS ALL.


BRING IT ON.
lannan13

Con

I accept Pro's terms.

Here are mine.

God exsists.
Communism isn't as bad as the conservatives say.
Kansas isn't flat.
Debate Round No. 1
cheesedingo1

Pro



Ok, I agree to all of my opponent's terms, exept for the God one. We will not go into religion here, considering i put this into the "Politics" section, not the "religion" section. All other terms I agree with.

Now, I will say how my points are relevent and how my opponents points contribute to me.


My points:
1) Alaska is a place of tortilla chips and polar bears. Chickens are the dominant Species, because they're smart enough to . Polar bears eat chickens, so chickens leave alaska alone. They are alergic to tortilla chips.



2) This is just to clarify in case my opponent go's off on the rabbit trail.

3) Chickens are so far out of our league, they don't have a friendzone. Chickens think about nothing but eggs, laying eggs, omellettes, and the destruction of mankind. Chickens get it on with eachother and don't care about palygamy (for clarification, palygamy is the act of getting it on with many people while in a stable relationship). There is no such thing as a friendzone to them. They are so direct with their thoughts, they don't worry about these petty things, like relationships and sh*t like that (more on this later). This is why they are superior.

Now, onto my opponents case.

1) Already established, this is political, not religious (more on this later).

2) Communism isn't as bad as the conservatives say.

Chickens are communistic. FACT.

They do not have to worry about politics and land and all that.

The defenition of Communism is "A political theory derived from Karl Marx, advocating class war and leading to a society in which all property is publicly owned and each person works and is paid according to their abilities and needs." (www.googlechrome.com/dictionary) (By the way, this argument on Communism is why It is put in the politic section).

You see? Chickens distribute their property amongst the coop. Everyone has a space. Each chicken is rewarded for having the most eggs. They do not worry about petty things such as money, but a place in government when they take over. But that would mean that only women chickens, AKA hens, would be leaders, since only females lay eggs. But, having women in government ISN'T BAD. http://www.debate.org...;
(See the above debates and the reasoning by Imabench's arguments).

3) Kansas, indeed, isn't flat. It says on geography maps that it is flat, but, THAT'S WHAT THE CHICKENS WANT YOU TO THINK. It is actually not. The chickens are smart enough to alter reality, and are smart enough to stay undetected by us humans for thousands of years. Us humans, on the other hand, just came out and pronounced ourselves the dominant species.

Now, back to my argument on chickens not thinking about the petty things such as the friendzone. Us humans are a distracted race. We used to not be so. We used to be focus and get lots accomplished. (See my closing argument). Now, with iPhones, video games, drugs, and TV, we are a distracted race and lack the focus we once had that made us such a great race. Chickens, on the other hand, have remained focused and on task for thousands of years, secretly watching over us humans. Then, the first episode of "Jersey Shore" came about. The chickens were expecting something horrible to happen with the humans, but nothing like this. They knew that we had hit rock bottom, and that the chickens must come from the ashes of our once great reign.

Now, they are secretly planning to overthrow us.


But, the Mayans have already foresaw this.


Conclusion: You see, the humans once focused enough to understand the power and capability of chickens. The chickens were great friends with the Mayans. They worked together to create the magnifacent structures and the calander that they created. But, the chickens foresaw that the humans would become far too corrupt in 2012. So, they've been secretly coming up with plans to overthrow us on December 21 of 2012. The humans all think it will be a massive earthquake, or a collection of natural disasters in an unnatural pattern with great power.

But....... IT WAS THE DAY THE CHICKENS WILL TAKE OVER.

Be afraid. Be VERY afraid.....



Thank you.
lannan13

Con

Commy
U.S. is a Capitolist nation so that's one reason why we're going to cap the chickens. I'm also pretty sure that the U.S. with the worlds largest military won't fall to the food item in ille 9. The Chickens will look to the book of Animal Farm as a propacy. Look at it this way who would win in a tank vs. 100 chickens. It's obvesous tank. Only people that can do work get the most, the disabled chickens are left out.

Kansas isn't flat
Chickens can't alter reality only Dr. Who can do that. As you see this is another sterotype people have, people fear what they don't know. So going against sterotypes is typicly bad. If chicken take over was possible we couldn't advance in technology and ultamatly we would revolt latter. Like in Planet of the Apes.

Alaska is a place of Chips and Polar bears.
It's a good thing they leave Alaska alone, but the Bears want to conquer the chickens and keep humans in power, because the humans give the bears a supply of vaxcine.

Chickens are same except for sex
Debate Round No. 2
cheesedingo1

Pro

I thank Lannan13 for his arguments. This is getting sweet.

Commy: The U.S. may be a Capitolist nation as well. I would like my opponent to show how the U.S. is better than chickens just because they are also capitalist, unless we drop the point as a tie considering both Americans and chickens are communist. Also, as I said, the chickens are plotting secretly without detection. When the humans see that they are up against chickens, they will not be as serious about killing them, because they are, as you say, "the food item in isle nine". They will be totally caught off gaurd, and the chickens will use the element of suprise to defeat them. As I said, the chickens have a super weapon that will obliderate the humans.

Kansas isn't flat:As you see this is another sterotype people have, people fear what they don't know. So going against sterotypes is typicly bad. If chicken take over was possible we couldn't advance in technology and ultamatly we would revolt latter. Like in Planet of the Apes.
Exactly, people fear what they don't know. They don't know that chickens will revolt and kill them. And for planet of the apes, in those movies, the monkeys were shown as being dominant, therefore agreeing with my argument that chickens are superior.

Alaska is a place of Chips and Polar bears:It's a good thing they leave Alaska alone, but the Bears want to conquer the chickens and keep humans in power, because the humans give the bears a supply of vaxcine.
They would want to, but polar bears will be overwhelmed by shere numbers.

"Scientists can only provide informed estimates. In 2008, scientists estimated that there might be 20,000 to 25,000 of them."
(http://www.polarbearsinternational.org...)

Now, there are 2,902,500,000,000,000 chickens. Do the math.
(http://answers.yahoo.com...)

My opponents arguments against me are destroyed, and he didn't attack my points on the mayan appocalypse or the friendzone. He only attacked some of my points, so the rest of my argument is still strong.

WATCH OUT!

.....the chickens are closer than they appear....

thank you
lannan13

Con

Communism
U.S. is the center of the world market and the world Superpower. U.S. is also the world's most obese nations so when we want our fried chicken and our chicken wings we are going to get our FOOD!!! But yet again lets do the math 100 chickens versus a tank. I wounder who will win, it's easy a tank. Or even an air craft vs. millions of chickens, bomb equals death. It's not that hard to see that the U.S. alone could easily take out the chickens. We our also a moralistic country we were controlled by Republicans and Conservative who believe communism is a bad thing this lead to the whole cold war.

Kansas isn't flat
I'm not agreeing with you. I was refurring to the older movie where the humans revolted. Second of all we have great tech now like the hydrogen bomb (thousand times stronger than a nuke), Nuclear submarines, nukes, jets, tanks, and a stockpile of smallpocks. Now this maybe what happens to a single human (see video), but a tank and arm vs a group of chickens.

Alaska with Chips and polar bears
Polar Bears are very violent Have you ever seen Golden Compass when the bears fought against the Majestirum. Tanks can easily take on chickens (see 3rd vidoe)
Debate Round No. 3
cheesedingo1

Pro

I thank my oppoenent for his arguments. Sadly, this is my last round, but I hope you all will enjoy it!

Communism: My opponent's main argument is that the humans will be able to destroy chickens because of human weapons, and because they eat chickens. But as I said, there are 2,902,500,000,000,000 chickens on this earth. I did the math, and that means that there 45 THOUSAND chickens for every one person on this earth. If hundreds upon thousands upon millions upon billions attack the united states, the chickens just by pure numbers could take over. As I said, When the humans see that they are up against chickens, they will not be as serious about killing them. Plus, the chickens have secret underground weapons that we humans have yet to know about and have yet to know how to defend themselves against. My opponent still hasn't combatted my argument on the mayan apocalypse after 2 arguments, so he agrees with my points about that and how they will win because they have the capability to take over the world.

Kansas Isn't flat:
The humans may have revolted, but they were still dominant. They were able to enslave the humans, therefore showing their dominance. And as I said in my first argument, chickens have secret weapons that can destroy the chickens. And if the U.S. bombs the chickens with hydrogen bombs, it's not like bombing another country. The U.S. will be bombing itself! They will do more damage to themselves than the chickens! The chickens will regroup after a bomb with their massive numbers, while the U.S. is still suffering. And, in the video, it show's one tank VS one chicken. If 45,000 or more chickens attack one tank with weapons of mass destruction, the tank will fall with ease.

Alaska with Chips and polar bears:
As I said, the polar bears are an endangered species (i know about this because I am alaskan, and there are many sources about it).

I did the math for the ratio of chickens to polar bears.






























145,125,000,000:1

Really? One polar bears can beat this many? I doubt it. There is no possible way one polar with no weapons versus 145125000000 with weapons can win. My opponent can come up with no way that the polar bears can win this massive of a fight.


My opponent has yet to tackle a ton of my argument and igores the number of chickens, the friendzone argument,the chicken weapon argument, and the mayan apocalypse argument. My case is still strong and I see no other side to vote for than pro.
I thank my opponent for this funny and entertaining debate, the voters for putting up with my ridiculousness, and the other debaters in this troll tourney. You all have been a great audience.

VOTE FOR PRO.

Doing so might prolong the date of the chicken apocalypse.

thank you
lannan13

Con

Communism
My opponet keeps on bringing up that numbers are the best and chickens will win because of that, well he's wrong. Why? Simple because we are advanced, have better wepons, and we have bigger brains. This will have chickens running like crazy.

And lets not fouget the consentration camps for the chickens, a slaughter house. You also think the numbers still mean something. Here's a fact for yah every day in the U.S. alone 23 million chickens are killed and that's 269 a second.
http://www.vivausa.org...

Kansas Isn't Flat
One sentense for you. Car kills millions of ants. So this would be the samething for chickens versus a heavy armored death machine.

Alaska with Chips and polar bears
Really with the numbers again. Did you even watch the video. How many chickens could take down a walrus eh? More than billions I beat. Besides the bears have armor (stated last round) do to the war with the majestirian. Besides the U.S. did the polar bears a favor and gave them a home in Alaska. As you see I've tackled everything and more.

Vote Con.
Doing so ensures that you can still go to KFC
Debate Round No. 4
3 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 3 records.
Posted by Zaradi 4 years ago
Zaradi
Leave it to lannan to take a troll debate seriously.
Posted by lannan13 4 years ago
lannan13
no problemo
Posted by cheesedingo1 4 years ago
cheesedingo1
Ummm.... can this not be about God? This is a troll debate, and I put this in the category of politics, not religion. I don't want to debate about God. sorry.
2 votes have been placed for this debate. Showing 1 through 2 records.
Vote Placed by 1dustpelt 4 years ago
1dustpelt
cheesedingo1lannan13Tied
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Total points awarded:30 
Reasons for voting decision: kfc
Vote Placed by Zaradi 4 years ago
Zaradi
cheesedingo1lannan13Tied
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Total points awarded:60 
Reasons for voting decision: I don't want to die, and maybe if I appease my chicken masters, they'll still give me KFC.