The Instigator
AlwaysMoreThanYou
Pro (for)
Losing
19 Points
The Contender
Nur-Ab-Sal
Con (against)
Winning
31 Points

Catknox

Do you like this debate?NoYes+7
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Post Voting Period
The voting period for this debate has ended.
after 8 votes the winner is...
Nur-Ab-Sal
Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 12/3/2012 Category: Religion
Updated: 4 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 3,329 times Debate No: 27720
Debate Rounds (4)
Comments (17)
Votes (8)

 

AlwaysMoreThanYou

Pro

Round one for acceptance. I believe in Catknox.
Nur-Ab-Sal

Con

I accept this debate. I also believe in Catknox.

What are we going to debate anyway?
Debate Round No. 1
AlwaysMoreThanYou

Pro

I thank my opponent for accepting this debate, although it is truly a shame to be debating a fellow believer, rather than an acatknoxist (they exist, believe me). I will be affirming Catknox.

Without further ado, I will present my arguments in favor of Catknox.

Contention One: Fulfilled prophecies

There are many fulfilled prophecies that prove the existence of Catknox. For instance, look at this post [1]:

'Catknox, why is masturbation bad according to the bible? Is anal sex bad?' - Wallstreetatheist

This was far before Catknox was born to the glorious forum of DDO, and thus we can tell that Wallstreetatheist forsaw the coming of Catknox. This prophecy was fulfilled by Catknox coming. Thus, Catknox.

Contention Two: Reliable testimonies

It is written [2]:

'I miss CatKnox.' - ConservativePolitico

ConservativePolitico would not be able to miss Catknox if he never knew Catknox to begin with. It follows he must have known of Catknox. Therefore, Catknox.

Contention Three: Great teacher

My opponent himself acknowledges that Catknox was a great theologian, as he himself wrote [3]:

'Besides the obvious answer of Dogknox, the late Catknox was also one of the most brilliant and talented theologians to ever grace the Religion Forum. May Catknox rest in peace.'

Resultingly, Catknox.

Contention Four: The Argument from Logic

Premise One: Catknox

Conclusion: Catknox

This is logically valid, and axiomatic. Ergo, Catknox.

Contention Five: The Argument from Shifting the Burden of Proof

You can't disprove Catknox. Conclusively, Catknox.

Contention Six: The Argument from Newton's Third Law

Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Dogknox is an action. Thus, Catknox must exist as his equal and opposite reaction. Hence, Catknox.

Contention Seven: The Argument from Authority

I say Catknox. Accordingly, Catknox.

Conclusion:

Catknox.

Source:
1. http://www.debate.org...;
2. http://www.debate.org...
3. http://www.debate.org...;
Nur-Ab-Sal

Con

I'd like to thank AlwaysMoreThanYou for introducing seven arguments for Catknox.

As a fellow believer, I will introduce more arguments for Catknox.

Contention One: The Argument from Fancy Logic

P1. ∀(x) Dx -> Cx
P2. Dk
C. :. Ck (MP,1,2)

Premise 1 is a universally quantified implication, for a "Dog" cannot exist if there is not a "Cat" to fundamentally oppose it. Premise 2 affirms the Dog exists in the form of a "Knox." Therefore, I conclude through modus ponens that a Cat also exists in the form of a "Knox." Hence, Catknox.

Contention Two: The Argument from Opposing Theologians

As we all know here on the Religion forum of DDO, Dogknox is unmatched in his knowledge of Catholic doctrine. [1] Even my opponent agrees to this, often referencing the skills of Dogknox. [2]

However, before Catknox, there were no grand theologians for Amishmen. Hence, Catknox. [3]

Contention Three: The Argument from Knoxnews.com

The news source for Knoxville, knoxnews.com, has a user registered name Catknox. [4] Hence, Catknox.

Contention Four: The Thomistic Argument for Catknox

Hundreds of years ago, the great theologian St. Thomas Aquinas wrote his Five Ways of proving God's existence. I'm here to tell you that St. Thomas Aquinas had no idea he actually presented an excellent argument for Catknox as well.

1. There are different degrees of Amishness in different things.
2. There are different degrees of being in different things—the more being, the more Amishness.
3. For there to be degrees of being at all, there must be something which has being in the highest Amishness.
4. Therefore, a Being in the Highest Amish Degree or Perfect Amish Being exists.
5. Hence, Catknox.

Contention Five: The Argument from Consciousness

I have thoughts about Catknox. [5] Hence, Catknox.

Contention Six: The Argument from Emotion

What the hell would we do without Catknox? Think of the starving children! Hence, Catknox.

Contention Seven: The Argument from my Opponent's Arguments

My opponent's arguments for Catknox are highly convincing. Hence, Catknox.

Sources

1. http://goo.gl...;
2. http://www.debate.org...;
3. https://debate.org...;
4. http://www.knoxnews.com...;
5. I really do. Trust me.
Debate Round No. 2
AlwaysMoreThanYou

Pro

I cordially thank Nur-Ab-Sal for his magnificent arguments in favor of Catknox.

As we have now established Catknox, the next task is to prove that Catknox is the greatest, which my opponent has already touched upon in his Thomistic Argument for Catknox. This segways wonderfully into my first argument:

Contention Eight: The Argument from my Opponent's Arguments (Take Two)

My opponent's fourth contention proves a perfect Amish being, Catknox. A perfect being is the greatest. Therefore, my opponent's fourth contention proves Catknox is the greatest.

Contention Nine: The Argument from Babblings

Cow flying pineapple clock shoe sun verily backwards gardener cosmic fireplace.

Catknox can make sense of this completely incoherent gibberish. Therefore, he must be pretty great. I am almost as great as can be, and I can't make any sense of it. To make sense of it, Catknox must be greater than I, and since I'm almost as great as can be, Catknox must be the greatest to be greater than me. Ergo, Catknox is the greatest.

Contention Ten: The Argument from Insurmountable Arguments

No one could overcome Catknox in a forum argument [1]. The greatest debaters ever are on this site. If the greatest debaters couldn't overcome Catknox, it must be because he's the greatest debater. Only the greatest being could be the greatest debater, so Catknox is the greatest being.

Contention Eleven: The Argument from Comfort

It makes me feel good to think that Catknox is the greatest. Therefore, Catknox must be the greatest.

Contention Twelve: The Argument from Threats

If you don't think Catknox is the greatest, I'll find your house and burn it down.

Contention Thirteen: The Argument from Indefensible Presuppositions

Premise One: There is one being greater than all others
Premise Two: That one being is Catknox
Premise Three: That being is the greatest being

Conclusion: Catknox is the greatest being

Contention Fourteen: The Argument from Me

I wouldn't have spent all this time writing arguments if I didn't truly know Catknox was the greatest being, because it tires my fingers and uses up my valuable, valuable time. Therefore, Catknox must be the greatest being.

Conclusion:

Catknox is the greatest being.

Sources:
1. https://debate.org...;
Nur-Ab-Sal

Con

I would once again like to appreciateively thank AlwaysMoreThanYou for his contribution to our magnificent debate on this important issue.

I will introduce even moar arguments for Catknox's greatness.

Contention Eight: The Modal Argument for Catknox's Maximal Excellence

1. A maximally great Amishman exists in some possible world.
2. If a maximally great Amishman exists in some possible world, he exists in all possible worlds.
3. If a maximally great Amishman exists in all possible worlds, he exists in the actual world.
4. If a maximally great Amishman exists in the actual world, a maximally great Amishman exists.
5. Therefore, a maximally great Amishman exists.

Hence, not only does this argument reaffirm Catknox, but we see that Catknox must necessarily have all great-making properties.

Contention Nine: The Argument from the Argumentative Destruction of Richard Dawkins

As the great Richard Dawkins once said, "They felt the need to resort to Modal Logic to prove that I was wrong." [1]

Well we've seen that Catknox has been established through modal logic.

Hence, Catknox defeats Richard Dawkins. Hence, Catknox is great.

Contention Ten: The Argument from the Moral Impermissibility of a Technocratic Dystopia

As both my opponent and I have cited many, many times, Catknox, in his short time on this site, provided us with an intellectually stimulating thread on the wrongness of technology. [2]

Obviously, Catknox foresaw the Earth's slow drift into overwhelming technological reliance, ever flowing closer to the Singularity. Catknox saw that Man, in his naive perception of dominance over his mechanical servants, was enslaving himself to irreversible dependence on his automated contraptions, an enslavement that will certainly lead to a robotic dominion over its Creator.

Catknox, in his moral goodness, was warning us of this dystopian future. Hence, Catknox is great.

Contention Eleven: The Argument from Battlestar Galactica

Same as above, but with Cylons.

Hence, Catknox is great.

Contention Twelve: The Argument from Feline Superiority

Humans often label the Dog as "man's best friend," knowingly discriminating against the Cat. However, cats are better anyway. The Internet loves them. Therefore, any incarnation of a "cat" is superior, ceteris paribus, to any incarnation of a "dog." Since Dogknox is almost the greatest, anything above him is the greatest. Catknox is above Dogknox. Hence, Catknox is the greatest.

Contention Thirteen: The Argument from Richard Dawkins again

Just think about it. Catknox obliterated Richard Dawkins through his own necessary existence.

That's pretty frakking awesome if you ask me. Hence, Catknox is the greatest.

Contention Fourteen: The Argument from Numerology

If we assign numbers to letters (ie A = 1, B = 2, ... etc) then we get the following:

C = 3
A = 1
T = 20
K = 11
N = 14
O = 15
X = 24

The sum of these is 88. Chinese culture says 88 is a lucky number. [3] Hence, Catknox is the greatest.

Sources
1. Dawkins, Richard. The God Delusion. p. 84.
2. https://debate.org...;
3. http://en.wikipedia.org...(number)#In_Chinese_culture
Debate Round No. 3
AlwaysMoreThanYou

Pro

To the end I laud my opponent's powerful arguments, and I hope that this debate will strike fear into the hearts of the unbelievers.

I have but seven more arguments to present, arguments against the banning of Catknox.

Contention Fifteen: The Argument from Miscarriage of Justice

Catknox was never afforded a trial, or a chance to speak in his own defense. Throughout the history of this site, even the most moronic of individuals were afforded this right [1]. Therefore, it is a horrible miscarriage of justice to ban Catknox without a trial, and he ought to be unbanned.

Contention Sixteen: The Argument from Injustice

First, a quote from our current president [2]:

'The site seems to have plenty of ideologues who don't like to debate. But he does defend his views in his own way, and I haven't yet seen him be abusive, so I don't see any problem with him. If anyone sees him or anyone else be abusive to members in any way, be sure to report the post so I can make a note of it, and take an appropriate action if necessary. Simply reasserting the same points over and over without debating is not any type of site violation though.

Either way, Dogknox does seem to spawn lengthy and passionate religion topics, which is part of what this site was designed for.' - airmax1227

Catknox was no more abusive than Dogknox. Thus, his banning was unwarranted and unjust, and ought to be reversed.

Contention Seventeen: The Argument from Religious Discrimination

Related to Contention Sixteen, Dogknox (Catholic) was not banned, but Catknox (Amish) was banned. This is clear discrimination, hatred, and the logical result of the puppet regime we live under (airmax1227 was installed president through the intercession of the Vatican in an attempt to subvert free discussion by biasing the premier debate site on the internet towards Catholicism). Thus, it ought to be reversed.

Contention Eighteen: The Argument from Unparalleled Brilliance

Catknox's posts were unparalleledly brilliant. If we don't all want to doom ourselves, we would listen to him. We can't listen to him if he's banned, so he ought to be unbanned.

Contention Nineteen: The Argument from Recycling Quotes

An esteemable member wrote [3]:

''I miss CatKnox.' - ConservativePolitico

If people miss Catknox, he should be brought back at once.

Contention Twenty: The Argument from False Accusations

Microsuck leveled false accusations against Catknox [4]. Therefore, all arguments against Catknox are fallacious, and there is no just reason for banning him.

Contention Twenty-One: The Argument from Debate

The fact that I bothered to make a debate about this shows how much I care about it. If I'm passionate about a cause, people should try to make that cause succeed. I'm passionate about the cause of unbanning Catknox, so he ought to be unbanned.

Conclusion:

I thank my opponent for his solid case negating the converse of the resolution I am affirming.

Catknox.

Sources:
1. http://www.debate.org...;
2. http://www.debate.org...
3. http://www.debate.org...;
4. https://debate.org...;
Nur-Ab-Sal

Con

This has truly been an incredible, awe-inspiring, majesetic debate.

I'd like to thank AlwaysMoreThanYou before providing arguments against Catknox's banning. I'll provide some two.

Contention Fifteen: The Argument from the Fact That I've Seen Some Pretty Crappy Nations That Handle Justice Better Than Debate.org Does

North Korea is a pretty crappy place to live [1]. They wouldn't have banned Catknox because he's Amish. Debate.org did. North Korea > Debate.org? What the hell is this? Hence, Catknox was unjustly banned.

Contention Sixteen: The Argument from That Our Leader is a Salamander

Yeah, that's right. He's an axolotl. Look at this.

http://debate.org...

Would you trust a salamander to administer justice correctly?

Me, neither. Hence, Catknox was unjustly banned.

Contention Seventeen: The Argument from Political Philosophy

I'm sure there's a philosophical book somewhere that states something about justice that supports what I'm saying. Hence, Catknox was unjustly banned.

Contention Eighteen: The Argument from AlwaysMoreThanYou's Prediction

The following was said on the day of Departure of our Dear Catknox:

:At 11/13/2012 12:21:01 PM, AlwaysMoreThanYou wrote:
::At 11/13/2012 12:20:08 PM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:
::Where did Catknox go?
:He died, but on the third day he will rise again.

No prophesy should go unfulfilled. Maybe it isn't the third day, but we can come up with some exegetical excuse for this temporal inconsistency. Hence, Catknox was unjustly banned.

Contention Nineteen: The Argument from Confident Leadership As We Head to a Technocratic Dystopia

Obviously we're getting there. Who's better to ask to lead humanity through this dark robotic age than our dear Catknox, who has already spoken of the evils of technology? Can you think of a single better person? No? Hence, Catknox was unjustly banned.

Contention Twenty: The Argument from my iPhone 4S

Siri told me Catknox was unjustly banned. Hence, Catknox was unjustly banned.

Contention Twenty-One: The Argument from Debate

For my last contention, I will simply repeat what my opponent has said. We have obviously given good reason to unban Catknox simply through the sheer number of arguments we've put forth. If we weren't right, we wouldn't have spent hours and hours and hours of typing to accomplish this end goal. Hence, Catknox was unjustly banned.

Conclusion

This has been a great debate. My opponent and I have put forth numerous cases for Catknox, for Catknox's greatness, and for the unbanning of Catknox.

Hence, Catknox, Catknox is great, and Catknox was unjustly banned.

Thank you for reading.

Hail Catknox.

Sources

1. https://www.cia.gov...;
Debate Round No. 4
17 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 10 records.
Posted by Nur-Ab-Sal 4 years ago
Nur-Ab-Sal
Thank you, sir.
Posted by johnnyboy54 4 years ago
johnnyboy54
So full of win.
Posted by Magic8000 4 years ago
Magic8000
What.....the......hell?
Posted by JonK 4 years ago
JonK
what is dogknox/catknox anyway? i found someone named dogknox as i somewhat expected i would but whats all the hype?
Posted by Nur-Ab-Sal 4 years ago
Nur-Ab-Sal
Catknox willed it through his ineffable omniety.
Posted by bossyburrito 4 years ago
bossyburrito
How did I miss this?
Posted by natoast 4 years ago
natoast
.....

What?
Posted by Nur-Ab-Sal 4 years ago
Nur-Ab-Sal
Trasgu, I'm glad to hear you found joy in this debate.
Posted by TrasguTravieso 4 years ago
TrasguTravieso
You could say the votes were just a series of votebombs. But then again there was no other way to vote than arbitrarily (hence my abstention in spite of the great joy I derived from it)
Posted by Nur-Ab-Sal 4 years ago
Nur-Ab-Sal
This debate is supposed to be a tie...
8 votes have been placed for this debate. Showing 1 through 8 records.
Vote Placed by emj32 4 years ago
emj32
AlwaysMoreThanYouNur-Ab-SalTied
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Total points awarded:07 
Reasons for voting decision: Oh, yes, they do.
Vote Placed by philochristos 4 years ago
philochristos
AlwaysMoreThanYouNur-Ab-SalTied
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Total points awarded:07 
Reasons for voting decision: Let's face it. Catknox.
Vote Placed by NotYourFault 4 years ago
NotYourFault
AlwaysMoreThanYouNur-Ab-SalTied
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Total points awarded:07 
Reasons for voting decision: Well, this was obviously a Joke debate, but I felt con produced more compelling arguments for the true existence and maximal greatness of Catknox (PBUH)
Vote Placed by Chicken 4 years ago
Chicken
AlwaysMoreThanYouNur-Ab-SalTied
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Total points awarded:33 
Reasons for voting decision: Catknox won quite easily.
Vote Placed by emospongebob527 4 years ago
emospongebob527
AlwaysMoreThanYouNur-Ab-SalTied
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Reasons for voting decision: joiyhhkbb
Vote Placed by phantom 4 years ago
phantom
AlwaysMoreThanYouNur-Ab-SalTied
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Total points awarded:70 
Reasons for voting decision: At the beginning of the debate I agreed with con that catnox is great. After reading it though I now have to side with pro that catnox is great. I mean pro made an argument with every premise being "catnox"!
Vote Placed by Ron-Paul 4 years ago
Ron-Paul
AlwaysMoreThanYouNur-Ab-SalTied
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Total points awarded:70 
Reasons for voting decision: Uh, no, they don't.
Vote Placed by Azul145 4 years ago
Azul145
AlwaysMoreThanYouNur-Ab-SalTied
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Total points awarded:07 
Reasons for voting decision: Someone has to win this debate xD