The Instigator
diddleysquat
Pro (for)
Winning
6 Points
The Contender
edibleshrapnel
Con (against)
Losing
0 Points

Chocolate biscuits are better than sex.

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Post Voting Period
The voting period for this debate has ended.
after 2 votes the winner is...
diddleysquat
Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 4/17/2014 Category: Funny
Updated: 3 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 893 times Debate No: 52735
Debate Rounds (3)
Comments (1)
Votes (2)

 

diddleysquat

Pro

First round is acceptance.
edibleshrapnel

Con

I accept, but I am impatient, so let me ask you if you yourself have first hand experience with both "options" suggested.
Debate Round No. 1
diddleysquat

Pro

Experienced enough.

Thanks to my opponent for accepting this debate. I suggest the winner should be entitled to a prize nominated in the topic itself.

Chocolate Biscuits: Cookies, made from chocolate.

Better: More desirable, satisfactory, effective, appropriate, advantageous or well advised.

Sex: Intercourse. May or may not include oral stimulation, depending on whether you are a democrat president.

Chocolate biscuits are far more desirable than sex for the following reasons.

Chocolate biscuits are cheap - a couple of bucks a pack for pretty good ones. Sex is expensive - unless you have a spouse or regular partner, in which case it is really expensive.

Chocolate biscuits satisfy for longer. A few cookies can provide pleasure for hours. My spouse tells me 45 seconds is pretty good going for the alternative.

Biscuit crumbs are easier to clean up - simply brush them away. Even with the chocolate variety, a simple wipe with a wet cloth usually suffices. Sometimes that is good enough for sex also, but more rarely. Ask Monica.

It takes a lot of chocolate biscuits to make you fat. One sexual encounter can make you very fat if you aren't careful.

No one looks at you funny if you eat a chocolate biscuit alone.
edibleshrapnel

Con

Ha, your argument raises very good points, and funny ones to. However, if I was to be given the options of both, in a very public scenario, lets say my friends asked which I would rather have, I would probably say the latter because If was to tell them I would rather spend my evening eating a box of cookies alone, I would look socially awkward.
Debate Round No. 2
diddleysquat

Pro

Well, it is obvious that our social groups have somewhat different approaches. In my circle of friends, sitting around talking about one's sexual experiences for all to hear would be considered "socially awkward". If those experiences happened to occur while alone, even more so. Discussing whether a delta creme beats a creamy chocolate hardly raises an eyebrow.

Speaking of awkward, empires have fallen because of sex. Presidents have been brought to the brink of impeachment over it, televangelists have lost congregations of millions. When was the last time a humble chocolate biscuit caused such havoc?

This debate has been fun. I'd like to thank my opponent for the spirit of good humor they have exhibited.
edibleshrapnel

Con

Haven't empires fallen because of Gluttony? If the Chocolate biscuit is as good as you claim, that would exclaim the world-wide obesity epidemic, therefore your adored treat would be causing more problems then pro-creation. Also, is it more awkward talking about sex, or sitting alone with your fat self eating a big box of chocolate biscuits?
Debate Round No. 3
1 comment has been posted on this debate.
Posted by intellectuallyprimitive 3 years ago
intellectuallyprimitive
Pro must have had some disconcerting sexual encounters to propose that chocolate biscuits are better than sex.
2 votes have been placed for this debate. Showing 1 through 2 records.
Vote Placed by KingDebater 3 years ago
KingDebater
diddleysquatedibleshrapnelTied
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Total points awarded:30 
Reasons for voting decision: Cleaning is all that matters to me, and pro made the point that chocolate biscuits are easier to clean up. Viva la choccy bics!!
Vote Placed by The_Scapegoat_bleats 3 years ago
The_Scapegoat_bleats
diddleysquatedibleshrapnelTied
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Total points awarded:30 
Reasons for voting decision: Con did almost nothing to refute Pro's points. A clear win. :-) Fun debate!