The Instigator
Truth_seeker
Pro (for)
Winning
8 Points
The Contender
JesseR
Con (against)
Losing
0 Points

Christian teens should not be dating

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Post Voting Period
The voting period for this debate has ended.
after 2 votes the winner is...
Truth_seeker
Voting Style: Judge Point System: 7 Point
Started: 10/9/2014 Category: Music
Updated: 2 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 1,029 times Debate No: 62956
Debate Rounds (5)
Comments (7)
Votes (2)

 

Truth_seeker

Pro

Title says it all. Non-Christians can debate as long as they stick to Scripture and on topic.

First Round Acceptance
JesseR

Con

Hello my fellow DDO subscriber. I am flattered to accept this debate. I will make this as formal as possible.
Debate Round No. 1
Truth_seeker

Pro

Studies have shown that dating at such a young age may lead to reckless behaviors such as pre-marital sex and fights (1).

From observations and personal experience, people who are young don't have the proper mindset to handle relationships. When i was 13, i didn't have control over my emotions and treated girls more like objects than people. Young people are simply immature to have a real relationship with the exception of some but very rare. Teens may also lack self-discipline and responsibility for the relationship to work.

Christians also tend to get the wrong ideas of relationships from movies (ex. the Notebook, Frozen, Twilight, etc.) and romance novels as well as social customs (flirting, signals, playing hard to get, friends). It's based on emotion rather than mature understanding. This is a viewpoint far from what the Bible teaches about relationships. Relationships in the Bible are based on effective communication and security in the self as a steward of God's blessings not in what society teaches.

Gen. 2:24

"24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh."

What can we glean from the text?

1.A committed relationship - Nowhere is dating mentioned. A sold committed relationship for life is what God created the man and woman for. Dating is simply a method to test to see if your boy/girl friend is compatible.

2. Independence - In a committed relationship, the man is to be financially and emotionally independent in all aspects of life. If he's not able to provide for his own needs and wants, he cannot provide for the needs and wants of his lover. Most teens don't have that type of independence because of how society is structured. They have school to worry about and still live in their parent's houses.

3. Insight - God is the one who gives wisdom and provider of a companion of man. Before considering a life partner, it's wise to gain insight from parents and God. Teens may refuse to do so as their parents might not approve of the relationship.

4. Compromise - In a real relationship, you need to be able to compromise and work as a team. You and your partner must be able to work as a team. It requires trust, character, knowing who you are and what you want, selflessness, sacrifice, dedication, and so on. You cannot fight over beliefs, appearance, be selfish, and must control the relationship very well. You must be willing to listen and understand to your partner as well as love them which takes patience. Teens might rush into love and end up dissolving the relationship because it was never built upon love.

Proverbs 31 gives a great example of what a wife should be like

10 " Who can find a virtuous wife?
For her worth is far above rubies.
11 The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
So he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
13 She seeks wool and flax,
And willingly works with her hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships,
She brings her food from afar.
15 She also rises while it is yet night,
And provides food for her household,
And a portion for her maidservants.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
From her profits she plants a vineyard.
17 She girds herself with strength,
And strengthens her arms.
18 She perceives that her merchandise is good,
And her lamp does not go out by night.
19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hand holds the spindle.
20 She extends her hand to the poor,
Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of snow for her household,
For all her household is clothed with scarlet.
22 She makes tapestry for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies sashes for the merchants.
25 Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom,
And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
27 She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her:
29 "Many daughters have done well,
But you excel them all."
30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised."

The Godly wife is independent and fears the LORD. She does her best in everything that she does for her family and husband. She has a strong character whereas many teen girls simply do not because they need more life experience and spiritual maturity to develop that kind of attitude. Courtship might be a better alternative than dating as it is well suited for men who seek a wife with the council of multiple family members.

Conclusion:

These are just few considerations to take to conclude that Christian teens should not be dating.

Sources:

1. http://www.everydayhealth.com...
JesseR

Con

To start I am not religious, but to maintain a correct/appropriate debate structure I will pretend that i am neutral on the subject.

I have dated in high school, and I have an opinion. That is "people should not date if their reasons for dating are not structured and have some basic morals", and that people that do not understand the concept of dating should not attempt.
Relating to the topic I ironically disagree that teens should not be able to date because of their religious beliefs.

I just at the moment because of lack of knowledge of the bibles contents had to research some things. I know understand that dating or having a sort of intimate relationship is allowed(according to the some of the bibles implied phrases or readings). Now the only contradiction is what can happen inside the relationship. From my information restrictions on

I obtained this from http://www.openbible.info...
-Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Corinthians 13:4-7

That brings me to say that dating while practicing Christianity is not wrong, or can be considered a sin. The idea is just governed by restrictions that give people wanting to date who are also christian, a good syllabus on how to conduct these relations with others appropriately.

Through failure breads success my friend. That phrase is an analogy for what i am about to say. It is OK for in this debate's case "Christian teens". to begin dating. If things are not meant to be ,and they have been loyal and respectful all of the standards both partners must maintain for the relationship to be considered "Good in the eyes of Christianity". then their is nothing wrong. All of this in the act of separation, or the breaking up.

Experience is a very underrated thing when it comes to relationships. People have not been engaged in a clean, respectful relationships to be able to have one that is able to evolve into marriage. Dating is just a practice run to understand how to feel about people, and also how to base your actions off these feelings. Unfortunately too many people these days are ignorant and have ill intentions.

Again I am actually against the idea of Christian people to not be allowed to date. Yes i do agree their are problems but to say someone should not be able to engage in personal connection because of their religious beliefs. If most people are christian roughly about 90% in U.S.A then take a look around you and determine how many of these false connections between male female or even humans of the same gender? You wake up one day and congress proposes a new bill saying that " all christian Americans are not able to be associated in relationships", then what happens incarceration rates go up because people would do it anyways you cannot stop that connection between people it is a part of life and should be looked at as a mere way to gain experience so next time better results will be achieved.

Thank you my fellow debater, next round I believe is rebuttal I wish you good luck.
Debate Round No. 2
Truth_seeker

Pro

Thank you con.

Rebuttals:

While love is the basis for relationships, a marriage is a specific kind of relationship between a man and woman. No where does the bible mention girlfriends, it always speaks in terms of husband and wife.

Ephesians 5:22-23

"Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word"

According to this passage, authority is firmly established in a mature relationship. Something that doesn't really happen in dating. In the Scriptures, there is no "trying out." You immediately commit to a relationship for life given several principles.

"Experience is a very underrated thing when it comes to relationships. People have not been engaged in a clean, respectful relationships to be able to have one that is able to evolve into marriage. Dating is just a practice run to understand how to feel about people, and also how to base your actions off these feelings. Unfortunately too many people these days are ignorant and have ill intentions."

Love is not about feeling, it's about commitment. If people have not been in a clean and respectful relationship then they should not be in a relationship at all until they can develop the proper mindset and heart for a life-long one.

There are many life skills, responsibilities, and emotional maturity that teens must have before they engage in a relationship. Teens still need time to develop their values as believers and know who they are in Christ.
JesseR

Con

JesseR forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 3
Truth_seeker

Pro

I rest my case
JesseR

Con

JesseR forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 4
Truth_seeker

Pro

I rest my case
JesseR

Con

JesseR forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 5
7 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 7 records.
Posted by Truth_seeker 2 years ago
Truth_seeker
Well I just looked at your debates and yea some of them you lost all because of biased voters, but with others, i would have voted against you. Mainly because of semantics involved around proving God and stuff that gives people the opportunity to say you did not fulfill the burden of proof. I think it's just a popularity contest of people to be honest like who is more liked. I'd actually want to debate "God cannot be scientifically nor philosophically proven" with me taking devil's advocate if you don't mind lol.
Posted by Jellon 2 years ago
Jellon
I don't think I'm in any debates atm. Go ahead and challenge me whenever. I stopped taking DDO seriously when I realized that every debate is a popularity contest of ideas (as opposed to people). It doesn't matter if you debate well. Someone has to do something stupid to make people vote against their bias. It's sad and frustrating, because theists are in the minority here. I can't win debates.
Posted by Truth_seeker 2 years ago
Truth_seeker
Lol zmikecuber i mean the same thing and Jellon, I would probably take this with you lol.
Posted by Jellon 2 years ago
Jellon
TS, I'll probably take this debate with you if you define dating.
Posted by Jellon 2 years ago
Jellon
He meant both in the places he used them. The title is correct and the first round wasn't referring to the title when he said debate. He meant that non-Christians can accept the debate if...
Posted by zmikecuber 2 years ago
zmikecuber
Loool... you put datin gin the title. ANd debating in the first round. Which did you mean?
Posted by GoOrDin 2 years ago
GoOrDin
define dating please so that I can accept this challenge with confidence and dignity.
2 votes have been placed for this debate. Showing 1 through 2 records.
Vote Placed by Blade-of-Truth 2 years ago
Blade-of-Truth
Truth_seekerJesseRTied
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Total points awarded:40 
Reasons for voting decision: Conduct - Pro. Con forfeited the last 3 rounds, which is rarely acceptable conduct in any debate setting. S&G - Tie. Both had proper spelling and grammar throughout the debate. Arguments - Pro. Con's arguments were interesting and didn't necessarily negate Pro's case directly but instead tried to amend his case by adding stipulations of who should and shouldn't date. Unfortunately for Con, Pro was able to overcome those challenges in the following round. After that, Pro's arguments were simply left standing unchallenged. For these reasons, Pro wins arguments. Sources - Tie. Both utilized sources in this debate, both were of christian text root. This is a clear win for Pro.
Vote Placed by lannan13 2 years ago
lannan13
Truth_seekerJesseRTied
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Total points awarded:40 
Reasons for voting decision: Forfeiture