Congress and Obama Should be Sodomized (in their Anus's)
Debate Rounds (3)
First Round acceptance only, shared burden of proof, I'll make my opening argument tomorrow or early next week,depending on when this debate is accepted.
And it would have many more more positive affects such as weeding out the week and corrupt in are government. Those that couldn't stand their anus being prodded, would have to resign. Think about it, if a Representative can't stand being sodomized then, should we really trust him/her to withstand the temptations of "campaign donations"? Which amounts to little more then bribery, from lobbyist who want their agenda pasted into law, can we really trust them to vote with their conscience and not with their party? I think not!
It could stimulate the economy, I'm not arguing for sodomy to occur only once. But on a daily if not hourly basis. But who's going to be the one to complete this noble task? Unemployed Americans! But their not going to be unemployed for long. As their going to get hired as a " Anus Spelunker's" or "As" for short, they could either do it the old fashioned way, or use some type of stainless steel rebar or dildoa . How many Congressmen and Congresswomen are there? 435, how many senators 100, and there are the 15 members of Obama's cabinet, and Obama himself as well as Joe Biden. That means that 552 people would need to be hired to perform this critical task. Just think of all the family's who will make it because a loved one has a job, doesn't it bring a tear to your eye? But i know what your thinking, "oh no, not another federal program that's going to increase are debt to China". Well maybe it would...in the short term. But consider all the commercial opportunities, this practice would bring. Lets get rid of congressional summer recess, and instead use that time to have gladiatorial style wrestling and boxing matches, where the winner gets to have a day free from sodomy, where as the loser gets twice the usual amount of anal exploration. We could sell tickets to people wanting to see the fight's. Democrats vs Republican's, Men vs Women. Maybe it would create its own mixed martial arts league! They could even have fights as half time show's , corporation's could make endorsements to certain officials, bringing in even more money through advertisements, and the much needed revenue could go toward funding schools or civil services. Benefiting everyone.
The government are not deserving of such privileges as sodomy. Most of the Republicans are closeted homosexuals anyway, and would likely enjoy it. Can you imagine the consequences of subjecting the public to Rick Santorum's o-face?
I am arguing that we should take a unifying action with the entire government. The Revolutionary Guard shall arrest every single congressman, senator, governor, minister, ambassador (American ones posted overseas), banker, executive, corporate lawyer, Wall St Accountant, intelligence official, Supreme Court Judge, all people who formerly filled these roles, all former presidents and of course, the dear leader; and place them before tribunals. They shall be charged with treason, fraud, corruption and conspiracy for all of the above. Where appropriate, they shall be accused of war crimes, crimes against humanity, murder, genocide, grand larceny, etc.
If found guilty on more than one of these charges, the punishment shall be execution. If found guilty of one, the punishment shall be being stripped of their property and exiled Roman-style. All people found guilty are to have their property forfeited, as well as all of their personal wealth and intellectual property.
The methods of execution would differ depending on the person.
Congressmen, Senators and Governors shall be united regardless of party, and a Democrat is tied to a Republican in the aptly named 'Republican Marriage'. They are stripped, lashed together with rope and thrown from the balcony of the Jefferson Memorial. All of the marriages will be same sex, and the phrase 'changing the definition of marriage' shall be brought to a whole new level.
Executives, bankers, corporate lawyers and accountants shall be subjected to the Aztec and Sassanid punishment for conquistadors or captured expeditioners. It consists of slaking their insatiable appetite for gold by pouring molten gold down their throats. A more crude version of this occured in Game of Thrones, but this will involve small amounts of the gold they forced the government to sell.
Intelligence Officials shall be subjected to the most brutal actions carried out under their watchful eyes in Guatemala in the late 1940s, and shall be imprisoned, but while in prison, injected with syphilis and made to die a slow and agonising death from the disease.
Ambassadors shall be subjected to the most brutal actions carried out towards dissidents by a state with amicable relations with the US. Their fingernails shall be removed, and they should be boiled alive. This is one of the punishments the current Uzbek dictator Islam Karimov regularly condones
Only then can we build a better future for us all.
SirReed forfeited this round.
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