The Instigator
bexy_kelly
Pro (for)
Losing
0 Points
The Contender
brian_eggleston
Con (against)
Winning
9 Points

Curling - the obsessive cleaner's sport!

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Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 6/3/2008 Category: Sports
Updated: 8 years ago Status: Voting Period
Viewed: 1,322 times Debate No: 4317
Debate Rounds (4)
Comments (8)
Votes (3)

 

bexy_kelly

Pro

Curling: a sport played by two teams of four players each on a rectangular sheet of carefully prepared ice. Teams take turns sliding heavy, polished granite stones down the ice towards the target (which is called the house). Two sweepers with brooms accompany each rock and use timing equipment and their best judgment along with direction from their other team mates to help direct the stones to their resting place

Source: http://en.wikipedia.org...

An obsessive cleaner is someone who is obsessed with cleanliness- i.e. everything MUST be clean. This part of their character is incorporated into almost every aspect of their life

I am in favour of the topic. Curling is THE sport for obsessive cleaning people. I am not in any way saying that curling is for no one else- only that curling should be proclaimed as the international sport for obsessive cleaner's

You may ask why?

1) Curling involves the sweeping of the broom, effectively "cleaning" the surface of the ice. ClEANER'S NEED THEIR SPORT!

2) Obsessive cleaner's do not have an international sport. They need one, it is simply a part of their identity!
brian_eggleston

Con

With thanks to my opponent for starting this debate, I was wondering how long it would be before someone started a Winter Sports for Lovers of Domestic Duties-related argument on this site.

I am particularly pleased to discuss the sport of curling because I feel very strongly that it should most certainly not be "proclaimed as the international sport for obsessive cleaner's". No, it should be banned altogether because it makes non-curling men who hate cleaning lives a misery.

Let me illustrate why with a short tale of misery and woe…

In 2002 I watched the Great Britain women's curling team win gold in the Winter Olympics on the telly in my flat in London, which looked like a pigsty, as usual.

http://news.bbc.co.uk...

I learned that the entire team came from Scotland, where the sport was invented and is quite popular, and I thought "those Scottish girls look pretty handy with a broom, maybe I'll move up there and find a bonnie wee lassie to move in and clean up after me", and so I did.

I went down to the curling rink and found a girlfriend who I carefully selected for her good looks, charming personality and, most importantly, her formidable skills with a brush. I thought my days of living in filth and degradation would soon be over, but I didn't think it through.

She spent so much time at the rink that when she came home she was too tired to clean up. Worse still, because she was obsessive about cleanliness, she nagged me to death about how dirty and untidy the place was and demanded that I should get up and brush the floor myself!

I did get up, actually, and moved back to England, where there are no curling rinks and girlfriends do not have the opportunity to waste their cleaning skills outside the home.

That is why I must certainly challenge my opponent's assertion that obsessive cleaners need an international sport – they don't. Instead, they can all come round to my place where I will time them to see who cleans up the quickest and award a box of chocolates to the winner.

I urge you to vote Pro for the abolishment of the divisive sport of curling.
Debate Round No. 1
bexy_kelly

Pro

I feel sorry for my poor opponent who has unfortunately come to associate the beautiful sport of curling with pain and being forced to clean.

But unfortunately for you there is a certain aspect of the obsessive cleaner's that you seem to be unaware of. They are slightly insane (well no surprises there!), and unfortunately if they do not immerse themselves in a physically demanding sport such as curling they will behave like an unwalked dog, with the general symptoms being running around the place, knocking over furniture and creating a general mess, yes even messier then your "pigsty" of a flat. Imagine that! They may even revert back to the old habits of childhood, sometimes using the walls/ furniture etc. as one would generally see fit to use a toilet in protest!

A person with such obsessive cleaning power simply must have their "needs" provided for. No home could be too messy for one of these people. No Brian, not even yours. These obsessively clean people simply need their sport in order to retain their sanity. They have exceptionally high energy levels. Unfortunately a messy home is simply not physically demanding enough. And as they would eventually end up knocking everything over and destroying the home, the thought of living in such a disgusting area would perhaps make them lose their mind completely, if left in that situation for too long. The symptoms are generally staying for most of the day in a toilet, insane laughter, often calling out the words "who is clean enough NOW?" and eating ones excrement.

In order to retain these peoples sanity, who are already very nearly tipping over into the dark realms of insanity, we must retain this beautiful sport of curling, and proclaim this sport as the International Sport of the Obsessive Cleaner, so the obsessive cleaners who are nearly going around the bend have a message, a hopeful beacon shining at the end of their tunnel of miseryness and squalor: "it is possible for you to get a life and get outside your house"

In short, I urge the voters to vote PRO, to see the continued play of this beautiful game, and to see the general improvement of the life of the average obsessive cleaner.
brian_eggleston

Con

I was distressed to learn that obsessive cleaners exhibit the extreme reactions my opponent described when they don't get their fix of their household chores. I must admit, I've never heard of this condition and my opponent offered no source or reference to support her assertions, but
she seems to know what she is talking about so we should take her word for it.

It seems to me that these people really need help. I mean, if throwing a Wendy and trashing the place isn't bad enough, people that deliberately smear excrement on the walls must be seriously disturbed. Actually, they remind me a bit of those kleptomaniacs who steal things even though they can afford to pay for them, like that Winona Ryder...

(http://www.courttv.com...

These sufferers need counseling, help and advice, but there doesn't seem to be any organization out there for them to approach.

Since my opponent seems to care a great deal about these people and is, apparently, very knowledgeable about their debilitating condition, perhaps she could start up a charity to help them?

I would suggest calling it the Friends of Obsessive Cleaners and Kleptomaniacs (FOCK).

I've even thought of an advertising campaign for her:

"Can't stop cleaning? Or can't stop shoplifting? Then why don't you go to FOCK? If you are seeking compassionate, sensitive, understanding advice, then FOCK offers you that, free of charge, no matter how demented you are."

So, if my opponent accepts her duty to society, she would be able to offer mentally-ill scrubbing fanatics sympathy and guidance, which will of be huge benefit to them and, thus, the world would be a better place.

But wait, there's more!

She could be of practical help too.

Imagine some frothing nutjob with Obsessive Cleaning Syndrome calls my opponent and tells her that her local curling rink is closed and, as a consequence, she has taken leave of her senses and smashed her flat up. She would, no doubt sat something like:

"Never mind, deary, these things happen. In fact I've just put the
phone down to Mr. Uttascombe. He couldn't find his sponges so he went Radio Rental and trashed his sitting room. The poor man, apparently all his neighbours heard the noise and gathered round his front window to watch. What a shame! He told me that they were cocking themselves laughing as he smeared faeces up his Laura Ashley wallpaper. But hold on, I've got an idea…"

And then my opponent could arrange for her to go to his place to clean up the mess and for him to go her place to reciprocate.

You see, everyone's a winner, man! Even me, because it negates the need for evil, socially destructive winter sports like curling.
Debate Round No. 2
bexy_kelly

Pro

bexy_kelly forfeited this round.
brian_eggleston

Con

My opponent just missed the deadline to post her argument. That is a shame, actually, but never mind, there's another round to go.

In the meantime, with the China 2008 games approaching, I was wondering what the origins of the Olympic sports were and so I did some research.

Apparently, warriors in ancient Greece used to compete with each other, for example, to see who could throw a spear the furthest. This became the javelin event in the modern games.

However the history of some of the other events is less obvious.

For instance, in the days of the ancient Greeks, gunpowder was unknown outside China and so their canons wouldn't fire. The warriors, therefore, had to take the cannonballs out and throw them at their enemies themselves, and this discipline eventually became the shot put event.

As most people know, lesbians are named after the Greek island of Lesbos, where female homosexuality first evolved. In those days, the lesbians sunbathed on the beach naked because bikinis hadn't yet been invented. Naturally, their nude antics soon attracted the attention of the local garrison of soldiers and they all used to go down to the beach to gawp at the women, probably hoping to witness some girl-on-girl action, although the history books do not specifically record this. Anyway, the lesbians quickly became irritated by the close attention of the ogling warriors so they built a big wall round the beach to keep them away. However, the ingenious soldiers discovered that they could use a large branch to help them leap over the wall and this developed into the pole vault event.

Greek food has not changed much over the millennia and in the days of the ancient Greeks, soldiers were forced to eat vine leaves stuffed with rice and fermented vegetables and other gruesome dishes that you can still find in Greek restaurants today. One mealtime, a warrior had a fit of understandable frustration, stood up and said "I've had enough of eating this muck, I can't wait until someone invents the hamburger" and he threw his plate away in disgust. His fellow soldiers duly followed suit and this developed into the discus event.

I bet not many of you knew these facts. Now you will be able to impress your friends and relatives with your superior knowledge of the Olympics this summer.
Debate Round No. 3
bexy_kelly

Pro

bexy_kelly forfeited this round.
brian_eggleston

Con

brian_eggleston forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 4
8 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 8 records.
Posted by bthr004 8 years ago
bthr004
What a FOCKING odd debate!
Posted by bexy_kelly 8 years ago
bexy_kelly
aww danm. I was gonna copy and paste the argument in, it said i had enough time (10 mins), but clearly i didnt!
Posted by brian_eggleston 8 years ago
brian_eggleston
I know you were only joking about my haircut, theLwerd, but, as I've said before, many a true word said in jest, eh? Anyway, The photo of me sitting in the balcony of my summerhouse overlooking the Mediterranean seemed a bit too bourgeois for my debate about the benefits that would accrue from a socialist revolution!

Ps I am a big fan of yours too!

PPs. I see you have changed your avatar also. Sorry, I'm a bit dim…what statement are you making there?
Posted by brian_eggleston 8 years ago
brian_eggleston
Sorry, that last argument was a bit rushed...it looks a bit messy, i know, but at leat I made it before the deadline...just!
Posted by bexy_kelly 8 years ago
bexy_kelly
Time is fleeing Brian. One day to go... Tick.. tock... tick ..tock..tick tock tick tock ticktockticktockticktocktick KABOOM!

Sorry had to fit an exploding clock in there somewhere :D
Posted by Danielle 8 years ago
Danielle
Ps. I was just kidding about your haircut...
Posted by Danielle 8 years ago
Danielle
I have no idea what curling is but I'll read this debate anyway; I'm a big fan of Brian's :P
Posted by bexy_kelly 8 years ago
bexy_kelly
hehehe... Very funny Mr. Eggleston.

I personally can't stand curling - everytime I turned on the TV to watch the winter olympics there seemed to be another curling team on the go!

"Well maple syrup and snows what they export
They treat curling just like its a real sport"

"Canadian Idiot" by Weird al Yankovich
3 votes have been placed for this debate. Showing 1 through 3 records.
Vote Placed by JBlake 8 years ago
JBlake
bexy_kellybrian_egglestonTied
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Vote Placed by LakevilleNorthJT 8 years ago
LakevilleNorthJT
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Vote Placed by brian_eggleston 8 years ago
brian_eggleston
bexy_kellybrian_egglestonTied
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