The Instigator
Con (against)
4 Points
The Contender
Pro (for)
0 Points

Dirty Jokes!

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Post Voting Period
The voting period for this debate has ended.
after 1 vote the winner is...
Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 1/22/2013 Category: Society
Updated: 5 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 1,600 times Debate No: 29455
Debate Rounds (5)
Comments (0)
Votes (1)



Con are the rules: Oops, there are no rules! Just type as many dirty jokes as you can ;)


Okay I am ready. I think... oh well. btw internet "research" is allowed.
Debate Round No. 1


What do a blonde and a barn have in common?
They always have a cock in them.


One day a little girl came running into her house yelling, "Mommy, I got five dollars!"
The mother was curious, so she asked her child where she got the five dollars from.
The little girl replied, 'Tommy down the street gave me five dollars for doing cartwheel while he sat in the tree.
The mother told her daughter, "Don't you know that Tommy is just trying to see your panties."
'OOOOhhhh' said the little girl.
The next day the little girl came running into the house yelling, "Mommy, I got ten dollars. The mother asked, "Where did you get the ten dollars from?"
The little girl replied, "Tommy down the street gave me ten dollars for doing a cartwheel while he sat up in the tree and laughed."
The mother replied, "Didn't I tell you that he is...'
Before the mother could finish, the little girl said, 'Wait Mommy. I tricked him, I didn't wear any panties today.'

Children in the backseat can cause accidents.

Accidents in the backseat can cause children.


THEVIRUS forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 2


Q: Why can't a blonde count to 70?
A: Because 69 is a bit of a mouthful.
There was this virgin that was going out on a date for the first time and she told her grandmother about it. So, the gramdmother says, "Sit here and let me tell you about those young boys. He is going to try to kiss you, you are going to like that but, don't let him do that. He is going to try to feel your breast, you are going to like that but, don't let him do that. He is going to try to put his hand between your legs, you are going to like that but, don't let him do that. But most importantly, he is going to try to get on top of you and have his way with you. You are going to like that but, don't let him do that, it will disgrace the family."
With that bit of advice, the granddaughter went on her date and could not wait to tell her grandmother about it. So, the next day she told her grandmother that her date went just like she had said. "But," she said, "I didn't let him disgrace the family. When he tried that I turned him over, got on top of him and disgraced his family."


THEVIRUS forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 3


"Jane" was becoming frustrated with her husband's insistence that they have sex in the dark. Hoping to free her husband from his inhibitions, during a passionate evening, she flipped on the lamp -- only to discover a cucumber in his hand. Is THIS what you've been using on me for the past 10 years!?!"
"Honey! Let me explain!"
"Why you sneaky bastard!" she screamed.
"You impotent S.O.B.!!!"
"Speaking of sneaky!" he interrupted, "Maybe you'd care to explain our two kids!!!
A guy and a girl are lying in a dorm-room bed after just having sex. The guy lies on his side of the bed and rests. The girl rolls to her side of the bed and says to herself, "I finally did it! I'm no longer a virgin."
The guy overhears her talking to herself and asks, "Are you saying you lost your virginity to me?"
"Well," the girl explains, "I always wanted to wait until I was with the man I love to lose my virginity."
Astounded, the guy replies, "So you really love me?"
"Oh God no!" the girl says. "I just got sick of waiting."
Two college roommates are about to go to bed. The guy in the top bunk has his girlfriend sleeping over. To try and keep quiet, they devise a code. His girlfriend will say "tomato" if she wants him to go slower and "lettuce" for him to go faster. As they begin to have sex, the girl starts to moan, "Lettuce, lettuce, tomato, tomato!" The roommate on the bottom bunk wakes up the next morning and says, "Stop making sandwiches at night. You got mayonnaise in my eye!"


THEVIRUS forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 4


One day a boy and his mother were watching Cinemax Late Nite, when they saw some people having sex.
"What are they doing, Mommy?"
"They're making cupcakes."
"Were you and Daddy making cupcakes on this couch last night?"
"Yes. How did you know?"
"Cuz I licked the frosting off this morning."
A guy orders spaghetti in a restaurant. In the middle of eating he finds a hair in his food.

He says to the waiter, "I'm not paying for this dirty meal," and walks out.

The waiter watches the guy go into a whorehouse. The waiter waits about 10 minutes, bursts through the door and finds the guy with his face buried in p**sy.

The waiter says, "You eat p**sy and complain about one hair in your spaghetti."

The man replies, "Yeah, and if I find any spaghetti in this p**sy, I'm not paying for it either."
Vote for me, guys! THEVIRUS isn't coming back, and besides, he didn't do anything ;)


THEVIRUS forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 5
No comments have been posted on this debate.
1 votes has been placed for this debate.
Vote Placed by RoyLatham 5 years ago
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Total points awarded:40 
Reasons for voting decision: Wow, these are really lame. I would have argued that they didn't meet the strict definition of "joke." Alas, Pro forfeited and argued not.