The Instigator
bubbatheclown
Pro (for)
Winning
1 Points
The Contender
joker_Master
Con (against)
Losing
0 Points

Facial Hair is a Significant Factor in the Rise and Decline of Civilizations/Empires

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Post Voting Period
The voting period for this debate has ended.
after 1 vote the winner is...
bubbatheclown
Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 3/6/2014 Category: Funny
Updated: 3 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 820 times Debate No: 48538
Debate Rounds (5)
Comments (1)
Votes (1)

 

bubbatheclown

Pro

Note: This is a troll debate.

To name just a few examples, the European settlers to the Americas had beards while the Indians were clean shaven, and the Native Americans are a minority in their own land today.

Hitler had a mustache, and he almost conquered Europe, but he lost because:
A. He was betrayed by clean shaven members of the Nazi Regime
B. He killed all the people who had the longest beards (Jewish Rabbis)

Joseph Stalin had facial hair as well, and the Soviet Union defeated Nazi Germany and established Soviet control over Eastern Europe.

There are plenty more examples of this, if you're willing to debate me.

However, the Illuminati (they rule the world, you see) consist entirely of clean shaven people and for the past 150 years or so they've been covering up the truth about the significance of beards to the rise and decline of civilization.
I am trying to let the truth be known so that America can rediscover the wonder of beards and regain its superpower status.
joker_Master

Con

however you see Grover Cleveland who did nothing significant to helping or hurting the us had facial hair.
Debate Round No. 1
bubbatheclown

Pro

My opponent started out with the following statement:

"however you see Grover Cleveland who did nothing significant to helping or hurting the us had facial hair."

Before I continue, I would like to contest this statement. Every US President had some kind of impact on the country. That being said, Grover Cleveland only had a small mustache.
Theodore Roosevelt, on the other hand, well, he also had only a mustache, but he was one of our most famous presidents. Abraham Lincoln had an outright beard, and everybody remembers Honest Abe as (arguably) our best President.

Critics who have been brainwashed by the Illuminati will point out that the Egyptians didn't have beards. However, the Pharaoh almost always had that artificial beard thing, which counts double because it was made out of expensive materials.

Critics will also point out that the clean-shaven Romans conquered the bearded Germanic and Celtic peoples, but the Romans were exceptionally brilliant. But even then, they were eventually conquered by the people who wore beards.

Also, must I point out that Jesus, Moses, the Sikh "Guru Nanak," Brigham Young, and Muhammed all had beards?

Hitler and Stalin both had facial hair, and their were great conquerors.

There is historical evidence (evidence that was suppressed by the Illuminati) that Queen Elizabeth I founded the "Society of Bearded Ladies." Famous members of this group include Queen Elizabeth, Susan B. Anthony, Rosa Parks, Clara Barton, Queen Victoria, and Margaret Thatcher. Of course, before having their pictures or portraits taken, all of these women shaved. It was their beards that made these women great, though very few people know (or knew) about their beards.

Gay people are detrimental to society because they shave their beards (and their legs) and thus they harm society with their shaved faces (and legs).

I challenge my opponent to prove me wrong in the next round. Of course, my opponent is also brainwashed by the Illuminati, the elite who control the Media (except for Fox News hardy-har).
joker_Master

Con

Even though every pharoh had an artificial beard it was often not made of real hair. Also many illuminatii members had facial hair so your argument that i am brainwashed is flawed. finally many gay men still identify as men and do no harm to society. and as my final point shreck when attacking someone first as to push the unshaved chwbacca out of the way.
Debate Round No. 2
bubbatheclown

Pro

My opponent said:

"Even though every pharoh had an artificial beard it was often not made of real hair. Also many illuminatii members had facial hair so your argument that i am brainwashed is flawed. finally many gay men still identify as men and do no harm to society. and as my final point shreck when attacking someone first as to push the unshaved chwbacca out of the way."

Rebuttal 1: Pharaoh's beard may not have been real, but it was still a beard. A golden beard at that.

Rebuttal 2: I alone know who the Illuminati members are (because I stole some of their classified documents), and none of them have facial hair, not even eyebrows.

Rebuttal 3: I looked up several gay people and none of them had beards. (Clay Aiken, Barney Franks, Jason Collins, Michael Sam, David Yost, George Takei etc.)

As for your claim about "shreck" and "chewbacca," I don't know what the heck that meant, so I'll just ignore that remark.

However, I can say no more about gay people because the LGBT community has strong ties with the Illuminati and if I continue, a large army of gay guys in tutus will converge on my home. See ya until the next round.
joker_Master

Con

well as the foolsh mortal that you are we made sure that the documentsthat you stole made it look like we had no facial hair. secondly the presence of facial hair shows that there is a high presence of testotorone in the body which is used by many men to fight in wars.
Debate Round No. 3
bubbatheclown

Pro

My opponent said:

"Well as the foolsh mortal that you are we made sure that the documentsthat you stole made it look like we had no facial hair. secondly the presence of facial hair shows that there is a high presence of testotorone in the body which is used by many men to fight in wars."

So does that mean my opponent's with the Illuminati? What a scary thought. But how would my opponent know what the Illuminati look like, since they only communicate through Twitter? (More specifically, an expensive Twitter app called "Twitter Elite.")
Testosterone causes wars, yes. But war is manly, is it not? This makes beards even greater!

A clean shaven population is a submissive population that will obey the government mindlessly. The Ancient Romans were clean shaven, and the mobs obeyed the government like sheep being led to the slaughter. A beard means independence and reliance on no one. That is why beards are awesome.
joker_Master

Con

joker_Master forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 4
bubbatheclown

Pro

Beards are awesome! Vote for Pro!
joker_Master

Con

joker_Master forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 5
1 comment has been posted on this debate.
Posted by bubbatheclown 3 years ago
bubbatheclown
Something tells me that you're somewhere around 14 years old. And no, my intention is not to insult you.
1 votes has been placed for this debate.
Vote Placed by Jifpop09 3 years ago
Jifpop09
bubbatheclownjoker_MasterTied
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Total points awarded:10 
Reasons for voting decision: ff