The Instigator
GrittyWorm
Pro (for)
Tied
0 Points
The Contender
Normerican
Con (against)
Tied
0 Points

I can make the voters laugh more than you can

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Post Voting Period
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after 0 votes the winner is...
It's a Tie!
Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 10/11/2015 Category: Funny
Updated: 1 year ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 654 times Debate No: 80808
Debate Rounds (5)
Comments (3)
Votes (0)

 

GrittyWorm

Pro

I believe that the people voting will be more amused by me than by you.
Normerican

Con

I'm not going to let this battle be dictated by either factual evidence or right-wing semantics. That being said, my opponent believes that he can amuse the audience better than I can. If that was the case, than let me ask you.

What newspaper do cows read?

Let me ask you another question:

How do you clean a toilet properly?

Now you may be asking what cleaning a toilet and the newspaper cows read have to do with each other. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! That's right, if my opponent believes there is a direct correlation between cleaning toilets and the Moo York Times, then how would my opponent's argument be valid.
I rest my case.
Debate Round No. 1
GrittyWorm

Pro

I start by giving all you single men out there some advice when it comes to being rejected by women. For example, you walk up to a woman and start enguaging her when she says,"I have a boyfriend." You reply,"Does this guy treat you well?" She responds,"Yes he does." You end the conversation with,"Good, because I wouldn't."

I must now give you some advice about women. I have found the best way to truely get to know a woman is to get her drunk. Then get her pissed off at you.

The next advice I have for anyone out there is how and when to make a toast appropriately. While at a banquet one time I, a white man, was getting chocolate milk and an African American man was getting regular milk. I then turned to him raised my glass and said " to not being racist".

I have yet another thought I must share with you reguarding sex. Sex and pizza are very similar. When it"s good, it"s very, very good. When it"s bad, you get it on your shirt.

It is now my opponent's turn, and all I have to say to them is...
I'm fat. Let's party.
Normerican

Con

Normerican forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 2
GrittyWorm

Pro

I was watching Robert Tilton, tv evangelist, and he said," Are you lonely?" I said,"yeah." He said"Are fat, naked, and drinking beer right this second?" I said,"Yes sir!" He said do you feel moved to send me $5,000 right now?" I said,"Close!" I had thought he was talking about me there for a second.
Normerican

Con

Normerican forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 3
GrittyWorm

Pro

An old man lived alone in Texas. He wanted to dig his carrot garden, but it was very hard work. His only son, who would have helped him, was in prison for bank robbery. The old man wrote a letter to his son and mentioned his problem. Shortly, he received this reply," For HEAVEN"S SAKE Dad, don"t dig up that garden, that"s where I buried the Money!" At 4 A.M. the next morning, a dozen policemen showed up and dug up the entire garden, without finding any money. Confused, the old man wrote another note to his son telling him what happened, and asking him what to do next. His son"s reply was: "Now plant your carrots, Dad. It"s the best I could do from here."
Normerican

Con

Normerican forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 4
GrittyWorm

Pro

The dogs discovered E-bay the other day. Now I can't find my cats.
Normerican

Con

Normerican forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 5
3 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 3 records.
Posted by breakingamber 2 years ago
breakingamber
SO LOL! I currently like GrittyWorm better. Hope his opponent gets his act together instead of insulting his opponent.
Posted by GrittyWorm 2 years ago
GrittyWorm
It's okay if you are scared.
Posted by PowerPikachu21 2 years ago
PowerPikachu21
I almost want to join this debate and spout nonsense... Nah, I'll hold off if someone else find this.
No votes have been placed for this debate.