Debate Rounds (3)
I believe cheating, whether in a 6 month relationship or 10 year marriage, is completely unethical. The simple minded relevance behind is ridiculous and weak. I'm sure there are some that will argue this by saying, "she might need to experience what it's like in order to recognize her mistakes." This may sound hypocritical, but I've had my share of cheating, (I kissed someone while dating someone else.) Maybe from doing it in the past, has allowed me to see how horrible it is today. In that argument, then I agree, there could be some leeway. What about the people that don't see to their mistakes? There's far too many that cheat again, again, and again, and still manage to overcome the guilt, (if they even feel any to begin with.) Even in psychology, there are infinite factors that lead people to make their decisions in life. Cheating could be the result of how a person was raised, their peers making similar choices, their self esteem, spite, etc. The act of cheating itself is subjective as well. We've all heard someone rely on the remark: "what _______ doesn't know, won't hurt him/her," or "it's not cheating if _______ doesn't find out." The only reason why these cliches exist is because deep down people know cheating is unethical, so they try to excuse their behavior with some comical relief. I'm not trying to sound like I'm bashing those who have done it, but at least come to terms with it being entirely wrong. I understand the disagreement: "it's hard to be monogamous because we're nothing more than animals." Hey, everyone has fantasies and innate desires, but I believe as humans our decision making is a little more advanced than those of our primitive relatives. We have political figures in this country who are supposed to be the depiction of professionalism. Yet, the news often reports them being involved in sex scandals. If people high in the governmental offices are doing it, then it may offer proof why infidelity could be viewed as justifiable.
I guess you can call me old fashioned but I believe when you are with someone who trusts you, you should respect them. If the love you both share is pure and genuine, then there shouldn't be a reason to want to cheat in the first place. Granted, that's not something easy to come across, but it's not impossible to find either. Everyone has their regrets, and although admitting to something you've done wrong won't excuse it, you will ultimately be one step closer to understanding the true fundamentals of love, compassion, and appreciation.
I agree with your idea that cheating is unethical in modern times, but you are making the assumption that humans beings are ethical. Let's be honest. Look at the world around us. How many people do the morally correct thing in a situation? Every individual likes to think highly of his/herself, but how many people live up to the ideal person they believe themselves to be? Human beings in general have become selfish. We all know what is right, but the average person isn't willing to sacrifice their own happiness and pleasure for a righteous cause. You are dealing with a generation that does not believe in morals (I should know because I'm part of this generation). The success rate of marriage has gone down significantly over the past 30 years. Marriage used to be a holy union separated only by death. People that got married 30 years ago tended to stay together because they believed in ideas like unconditional love, perseverence, and sacrifice. Those values seem to be few and far between lately.
I don't disagree with your ideas at all. I'm just trying to imagine it through the eyes of a cheating spouse or partner. If you omit religion and all the consequences of your actions, then what stops a person from cheating? In other words, if there was no God or figure of authority to punish you for your actions, would you do the crime? It's a classic question about the nature of human beings; it is the eternal battle of good versus evil. Would you rob a bank if you would never be caught? Would you kill someone if you wouldn't go to jail? Many would answer 'yes' to these questions.
I would like to believe, like you said, that human beings are much more complex than primates, and of course there are those few individuals whose self determination and righteous way of thinking lead them to living a moral, rich, and complex life. I adore those people, but they are very rare.
At our core, we are driven by basic human instinct. If you have ever read the book, Lord of the Flies, you know what I'm talking about. To sum up the story, a group of children were stranded on an island together. Soon, these children were driven to corrupt and immoral ways of living because society's pressure to adhere to morals was no longer there.
I know these are all abstract ideas and examples, but my point is this: people will often choose to fulfill their own desires and pursue their own happiness before the needs and wants of others. Is this selfish? Perhaps. Is it morally correct? Probably not. It happens unfortunately.
I believe in love and monogamy, and I believe it is possible to stay committed to someone forever. Cheating is immoral and harmful to everyone involved. I agree with you ashtronomy. But like I said earlier, some people recognize the right decision, and choose the wrong one just because they can.
Since there is no correct definition of what is right and wrong, then you must think that human beings should be governed. If people are naturally "driven by basic instinct," then it is apparent that things like, religion and government are needed in order to show people what morals are. We have laws for a reason, and we have religion for a reason; they both establish order and guide us in a society. Without this order, virtues probably would go flying out the window. You helped your argument by using the book, Lord of the Flies. The children, without any enforcement, succumb to corrupt ways of life. This proves my point that people need established rules in order to successfully construct any society.
If you think infidelity is just an abstract idea, then the fundamentals behind love, such as loyalty and commitment, must be abstract to you as well. Granted, we created these words to give us better insight on what love actually is, but they weren't created for any reason. These "abstract" ideas actually do exist, and varies from person to person. So if loyalty and commitment exist, then love must exist. If love exists, then there must be certain rules to follow while you're in it. One is remaining faithful to your partner despite the blame you place upon instinctive urges.
thegravenig forfeited this round.
ashtronomy forfeited this round.
thegravenig forfeited this round.
1 votes has been placed for this debate.
Vote Placed by Blithe 5 years ago
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Reasons for voting decision: Not much of a debate since they both agreed but pro forfeited twice
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