The Instigator
Walker
Pro (for)
Losing
6 Points
The Contender
TexasRanger
Con (against)
Winning
55 Points

Is Chuck Norris God?

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Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 12/16/2007 Category: Religion
Updated: 9 years ago Status: Voting Period
Viewed: 1,942 times Debate No: 527
Debate Rounds (3)
Comments (9)
Votes (19)

 

Walker

Pro

When one examines the basic facts of life, there can be little doubt that it all exists at the mercy of one man: Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris can kill a man by thinking about it. (Not too hard, because Chuck Norris does not believe in over-thinking things.) Anyone who has watched any of Chuck Norris's artistic masterpieces, or observed him kill a crocodile with his beard can attest to his omnipotence.

Proof of Chuck Norris's divine status:
1) Chuck Norris can do whatever he wants, whenever he wants.
2) "God" is defined as an omnipotent being who does whatever he wants, whenever he wants.
3) Chuck Norris always wins.
4) Chuck Norris never ends proofs on an odd number; this is America.
TexasRanger

Con

Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris is far more than God. Although god is described as an all-knowing, almighty being who can do whatever he wants, anytime he wants, it is very unfair to compare such a low being to Chuck Norris, even though this is all true about him as well.

As written in Chuck Norris's "Bible",

"God was choosing who would sit on the right and left side of his throne. He first asked Jesus who should sit at his right. Jesus said that he should be the one to sit at his right side, as he is his son. God then asked Gabriel. Gabriel said that he said the HE should be the one to sit at his right had, as he is the sword of God. God last asked Chuck Norris, who replied "I believe you are in my
seat"

we can conclude that Chuck Norris uses God simply as a puppet for his work. God is a creation of Chuck Norris's design, and is used in a similar fashion to a secretary.

It is very clear here that Chuck Norris is much more than God just from this one quote.
Debate Round No. 1
Walker

Pro

Chuck Norris knows all, and Chuck Norris knows who lays down the law. Why would Chuck Norris willingly create an impostor to his throne? Chuck Norris does not desire HERESY! He does not willingly bring impostors into his realm! The Wisdom of Chuck Norris is infinite; do you think that he would create a CHALLANGER to his THRONE?
TexasRanger

Con

When you ask "Why would Chuck Norris willingly create an impostor to his throne?" the simple answer is. He didn't. As stated above, God is more of a secretary to Chuck Norris, doing the easy work for him. Chuck Norris uses God to manage the life on Earth as it is, as well as maybe even other life as well.

"do you think that he would create a CHALLANGER to his THRONE?" Again here, Chuck Norris has no threat. Chuck Norris is so wise and smart that he would never create something so powerful without a way to overcome it whenever necessary. For a long time, Chuck Norris has hidden his identity. It wasn't until he was "born" that anybody knew of him, and this point in time, as we all know, is the point when Chuck decided to reveal himself to the world. Chuck Norris has also told God that if he ever tried to overthrow him, he would get roundhouse kicked to the face, ultimately leading to his immediate death; therefore, God has never even thought of trying.
Debate Round No. 2
Walker

Pro

Chuck Norris would not feel "threatened" by any creation of his. But neither would he invite such an irritant as a false God upon himself. You do not bring flies into your house; as such, Chuck Norris does not create deities who could be ascribed awesomeness on his level. While I agree Chuck Norris would be above any other entity described as a "God," I question the conjecture that he would willingly create an impostor that tries to take his limelight (or seat, as in your example.)
TexasRanger

Con

The issue here, however, is that God is not an irritant NOR anything that would "threaten" Chuck Norris. As we all know, God is a very "loving" being, who takes great care in the beings that he oversees. Chuck Norris created God with all the love he had left in him (which was very little), and thus creating a being with supernatural abilities, but far inferior to himself. One example of his little care for the beings below him is presented by yet another quote:

"Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried."

We can see here that Chuck Norris does not care enough to feel sympathy for anyone, and thereby felt he needed someone to do his work that could.

Chuck Norris is well known for roundhouse kicking ANYONE that crosses his path, or for the matter even looking at him. Yet another quote sets this fact in concrete:

"Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent."

As we can see from these statistics, Chuck Norris cares not about his people, and thus proving why he needed this loving "god" to protect his people.

This quote:

"Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back."

proves his true feelings, also once again reaffirming the notion above.

Lastly, this very famous quote:

"On the 7th day, God rested.... Chuck Norris took over. "

shows that Chuck Norris is indeed GREATER than God. If God was unable to finish the job himself, there would be NO reason at all for Chuck Norris to become involved, and therefore proves his superiority.
Debate Round No. 3
9 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 9 records.
Posted by brokenboy 6 years ago
brokenboy
he cant be god beacuse when god said give the world light chuck norris said say please
Posted by Creed-Diskenth 9 years ago
Creed-Diskenth
Am I supposed to take this seriously?

hHere's some awesome chuck norris quotes:

Superman wears chuck norris pajamas.

Ghosts are actually caused by chuck norris killing people faster than death can process them.

more to come...
Posted by TexasRanger 9 years ago
TexasRanger
Actually it was my friend's idea, we both got accounts to compliment each other and had the debate. Two different people but it was staged ;)
Posted by IraqiStateOfAmerica 9 years ago
IraqiStateOfAmerica
lol i think this is by the same guy
Posted by TexasRanger 9 years ago
TexasRanger
I'd like to make a small correction to my last comment, it's meant to read:

"If God was ABLE to finish the job himself..."
Posted by Korezaan 9 years ago
Korezaan
LOLz xD~!

Mucho awesomeness.
Posted by hattopic 9 years ago
hattopic
"4) Chuck Norris never ends proofs on an odd number; this is America."

Definitely the best line of the debate
Posted by verbivore 9 years ago
verbivore
LOL. This debate is too funny!
Posted by PoeJoe 9 years ago
PoeJoe
Con ~ Round 1

I can't remember the last time I laughed that loud!
19 votes have been placed for this debate. Showing 1 through 10 records.
Vote Placed by brokenboy 6 years ago
brokenboy
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