The Instigator
brian_eggleston
Pro (for)
Losing
23 Points
The Contender
johngriswald
Con (against)
Winning
60 Points

It's time to outlaw push-up bras

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Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 12/22/2009 Category: Society
Updated: 7 years ago Status: Voting Period
Viewed: 7,748 times Debate No: 10544
Debate Rounds (2)
Comments (14)
Votes (14)

 

brian_eggleston

Pro

Here's a story. It may seem irrelevant to begin with but please bear with me.

Last weekend I decided to hold a pre-Christmas cocktail party for a few friends so I went to a discount liquor store to stock up on cheap booze.

I bought a two-litre bottle of pre-mixed pi�a colada, a two-litre bottle of pre-mixed bloody Mary and a crate of asti spumante sparkling wine – all for less than �10. "What a bargain!" I thought.

The party, however, was not an unmitigated success - nobody touched their drinks. Wondering why this was, I went back into the kitchen to check the labels on the bottles. On closer examination of the label of the first bottle I discovered that it actually read: "Mary's Bloody Cocktail - the finest methylated spirit enhanced with extracts from used sanitary towels".

"Aha!" I thought and checked the next bottle and it had "Penile Colada" written on it with "a subtle blend of paint thinner and semen" printed underneath.

Finally, reading the label on the crate of what I thought was Italian sparkling wine, I was shocked to learn that I had actually been serving my guests "Asti Spewmante. A combination of vomit and saliva, fortified with turpentine spirit".

So, in view of these revelations, the whole party then adjourned to the pub. This is where the relevance of the story becomes apparent because that's where I met a group of girls and the one that I focussed on was the one that was wearing a tight, low-cut top that hinted at a modestly proportioned, yet seemingly perfectly-formed pair of breasts underneath.

"Phoaar! Don't mind if I do!" I thought to myself and I duly deployed my best chat-up lines in order to entice her back to my place. So, to cut to the inevitable bedroom scene, she proceeded to undress and when she undid the clasp of her push-up bra I thought to myself "Smashing! I've been looking forward to this for hours."

However, you can imagine my disappointment as, instead of the pert and shapely knockers I had been expecting, as her push-up bra fell to the ground her breasts just went ‘flop'!

"What a swizz!" I thought to myself, and although I managed to disguise my disappointment, frankly speaking, deep down I felt short-changed.

Now I blame myself for the sub-standard booze that I wasted my money on earlier that day – that was my fault for not examining the packaging closely enough. But I can't blame myself for being misguided about the nature of the girl's jubblies – after all, I was seriously misled by her push-up bra and to have made a close examination of her breasts in the pub would have been discourteous to say the least and very possibly illegal as well.

In the final analysis, by wearing a push-up bra that girl was culpable of false advertising – if I had known what sort of fun-bags she really had, I would gone for one of her more generously-breasted pals instead.

So, in an effort to prevent similar mistakes being made in the future, I affirm that push-up bras should be outlawed forthwith.

Thank you.
johngriswald

Con

I would like to thank my opponent for this debate.

To start off, I want to state my pity for my opponent as his sad incident as he wasn't privileged to live in the US, where they play spike TV.

Pushup bras clearly make boobs look better, which I say is much better than looking at saggy boobs all day. Pushup bras turn all boobs into good ones. Personally I like staring at all sorts of boobs boosted by pushup bras and fantasizing all day. My opponent seeks to limit he amount of people I can fantasize about.

There is a way to tell if a woman has saggy boobs, and it isn't to eliminate pushup bras so we can look at saggy boobs all days.

The answer lies with MANswers, answers for men.

http://www.spike.com...
I suggest my opponent seek ahead to 16:25 and learn a valuable lesson which will make his nights perfect, 100% of the time.
Debate Round No. 1
brian_eggleston

Pro

I would like to thank my opponent for accepting this debate and also for taking pity on me because I can't watch American television here in England.

As it happens, I've been to the US quite a few times and am a huge admirer of American TV, especially documentaries like the one my opponent linked to in his rebuttal which is called "Manswers".

Watching this I realised how far ahead of the rest of the world America is in terms of mammary research. If you didn't see the programme, it showed how scientists subjected female volunteers' breasts to rigorous testing in order to evaluate their performance under everyday pub conditions.

The scientists were so thorough with in their investigations that they even tested the ladies' ability to run while carrying drinks in their cleavages. I suppose they must have considered the possibility that a woman with no hands and a very thirsty boyfriend might be required to spend her evenings running to and from the bar with drinks for him? Very foresighted of them, I would say.

This series of tests eventually enabled the scientists to establish which girls' baps made the grade and girls' didn't, which is all very well and good, but it doesn't help us.

Even if you made taking these tests compulsory for all girls over the age of 18, it wouldn't stop those who failed from going into the pubs wearing push-up bras in order to deceive gullible men into believing they had nice pert breasts and thus obtain free drinks under false pretences.

No, the only answer is to ban push-up bras altogether, even though that might mean my opponent's opportunities to leer at women's cleavages are reduced.

Thank you.
johngriswald

Con

I would like to thank my opponent for his rebuttal however it proves that he has either intentionally ignored, or not watched the evidence fully.

"This series of tests eventually enabled the scientists to establish which girls' baps made the grade and girls' didn't, which is all very well and good, but it doesn't help us.

Even if you made taking these tests compulsory for all girls over the age of 18, it wouldn't stop those who failed from going into the pubs wearing push-up bras in order to deceive gullible men into believing they had nice pert breasts and thus obtain free drinks under false pretences."

It completely helps all guys at the bar. As when you make the girl come to you, it should be very easy to see whether the girls bewbs make the grade. As stated in the documentary, if a girls baps bounce above a 45 degree angle then you are guaranteed perky boobs that don't hang low. (seek to 16:30) So lure them over as if you are giving them a free drink, if they don't bounce act like you were talking to the girl behind them.

Men and some women of the audience, my opponent is seeking to destroy your pleasure. Thousands of perky D cups will be transformed overnight into sagging monstrosities by my opponents resolution. There are clear ways to recognize the difference as proven by my evidence. Boobs will be sagging. Fantasies all over the world will be destroyed. My opponent seeks to reveal the ugly truth. But do we want this if we can detect the pleasant lies? Imagine that no white lies were told. No makeup was worn. Fantasies were destroyed. Hope was gone.

This is the bleak world in which my opponent is attempting to bring about.

Vote for love, vote for fantasy, vote for justice, vote for perky boobs. Most of all vote for perky boobs.
Remember, a vote for perky boobs is a vote for Con.
Debate Round No. 2
14 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 10 records.
Posted by SexyLatina 7 years ago
SexyLatina
I might be about to vote-bomb in favor of Brian Eggleston; he is my new hero and idol. Nothing I ever do on this site will amount to the fantastic job he's done.
Posted by retarded-flamingo 7 years ago
retarded-flamingo
Nice story sharing, brian
Posted by dogparktom 7 years ago
dogparktom
"Pushup bras turn all boobs into good ones." John Griswald

LOL A statement for the ages!
Posted by Demosthenes 7 years ago
Demosthenes
This might be the funniest debate I've ever seen.
Posted by Alex 7 years ago
Alex
Brian, i must say I am 17 and even at this early age have run into some of these very circumstances. Girls under 18 have their own "Jublies " as well you know. Anyway, a very good debate, and am unconvinced as to whether or not I would like to bring down the force of false advertisement (also known as girl self esteem boosters) or whether id like to still have the opportunity to admire a fine looking set of knockers, even if they may not actually live up to their expectations.
Posted by stormc1nd3r 7 years ago
stormc1nd3r
Don't worry, I'm over it :P.

Seriously though, you shouldn't post something on a debate site without expecting people ripping it apart.
Posted by wjmelements 7 years ago
wjmelements
I love this debate.
Posted by Korashk 7 years ago
Korashk
I would like to thank brian for again providing a very amusing debate for all of us to read. This looks like it is going to be a fun debate.

Also, get over it storm.
Posted by stormc1nd3r 7 years ago
stormc1nd3r
How would it not be appropriate? Someone needn't be 18 to debate matters of a sexual nature. Most people learn about sex when they're 11-13. Most people have HAD sex before they're 18. Besides, it's not a very explicit debate.

People should be allowed to decide for themselves if they're old enough to debate matters of a sexual nature, as being a certain age has no defining bearing on your mindset.
Posted by brian_eggleston 7 years ago
brian_eggleston
It's not that, stormc1nd3r, it's just that it wouldn't be appropriate for me to debate matters of a sexual nature with a minor, that's all.
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