The Instigator
juddr
Pro (for)
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The Contender
Buddahcall
Con (against)
Tied
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Jeannie Crutchfield wasn't justified in treating her daughter, Ricci, the way she did.

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Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 10/18/2014 Category: Entertainment
Updated: 2 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 467 times Debate No: 63462
Debate Rounds (3)
Comments (2)
Votes (0)

 

juddr

Pro

Watch video: https://www.youtube.com...

I believe that Jeannie Crutchfield's actions were unjustified and, if I am honest, childish. I believe that she doesn't appeal to her daughter's interests and can lead to bullying and other problems in the child's future. I believe that Jeannie Crutchfield doesn't act as a mother in this family by outing her daughter's problems publicly. She doesn't act a role model and puts her daughter off having the incentive to work. Crutchfield acts as a bully!
Buddahcall

Con

Jeannie Crutchfield was completely justified in her actions, perhaps not the way I would have handled it yet justified just the same. Jeannie did not break any laws whatsoever, and handled the situation the best way she knew how. I have 5 children of my own and can attest that there is no magic book with all the answers, I am sure most parents have searched for it. I am pretty sure that her mothers actions have shown the daughter that there are consequences to her actions. There is clearly not enough information from a three minuet and one second youtube clip in order to know the entire story. Yes her mother is acting childishly though I believe that childish behavior is actually a mockery of her daughters childish behavior. Lets not forget that the daughter was the one ditching school, and these were her consequences. She may well think twice before doing it again.
Debate Round No. 1
juddr

Pro


  • You say that "she may well think twice before doing it again", but do we know, as the audience, the reason why she was ditching school? Her mother accuses her of ditching with her friends in the video, but her friend seems dumbfounded at this allegation. What if she was ditched school on her own because she wanted to miss a certain class where she got bullied? Bullying is such a huge problem in children's lives, especially in the American education system, that it may lead to a child not attending school. I'd like to ask you this: posting this video will inevitably lead to Ricci being bullied, so how can we be sure that she won't do it again? Her mother was being a bully herself, and I am guessing Ricci wanted somewhere to be alone where she wouldn't feel cornered by her family or the bullies at her school. I would like to say now that if I were treated like that by my Mother, I would run away from home forever, for what is family if you can't offer sympathy, wisdom and advice?

Buddahcall

Con

Do we know the reason she was skipping school? No of course not, we do not have all the information, though you can not hold a debate on speculation alone.

You can not admit we do not know and then make up your own speculation as to why she was ditching. I could just as easily suggest that What is "maybe" she was skipping school to have unprotected sex with her boyfriend? would you not agree that teen pregnancy is also a huge problem in children's lives these days? But these types of arguments hold no water which is why they are best avoided.

Bullying and Teasing are two different things, it is not inevitable that she will be bullied, though it is likely that she will be teased, she was caught there were consequences. I never said she would not do it again, merely that she may well think twice.

You say yourself that you are guessing.

"if I were treated like that by my Mother, I would run away from home forever" Such a ridiculous statement, life is harder than you are aware.
Debate Round No. 2
juddr

Pro

Although speculation can vary, the parent attacked Ricci like a bully regardless, whether Ricci was schiving for reasons like to 'smoke pot' or for reasons like bullying. A normal parent wouldn't surge through the school and chant after her daughter. It is morally wrong and doesn't help her child's cause. 'Teasing' and 'bullying' are basically the same in today's society, as some children can't deal with negative energy whether it is from acquantance peers or friends, either way if they are uncomfortable with it, it should be eradicated. Although, yes, I was a little ridiculous with "I would run away from home forever", I believe that if your family isn't there to support you with your problems and needs, why should you continue being part of it? Especially when, in some conditions, you could do a lot better without such bad parenting.

Buddahcall

Con

I believe that Jeannie was justified because she is the parent, and free to punish her daughter as she sees fit, within the parameters of the law of course.
You stated, "A normal parent wouldn't surge through the school and chant after her daughter." to this I say there is no such thing as a normal parent. I would go a step further and say good for her mother, at least she cares enough about her daughter to get involved, I do not feel she was doing it to be malicious, I think that this is an example of a mother teaching her daughter one of life's great lessons, that there are consequences for your actions. Your profile states that you are 22 years old though I find that very hard to believe based on your responses in this debate, and that the only other debate you are in is over whether Minecraft or Roblox is a better game. I am not saying that she is Mother of the Year, but she clearly cares about her child, even if she has a funny way of showing it.
Debate Round No. 3
2 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 2 records.
Posted by OpenMindedMindOpener 2 years ago
OpenMindedMindOpener
I am generally keen on arguing against over-the-top and borderline abusive parenting techniques. On many of the videos (laptop shooting, Video Game lawn Mower collision etc.) I can be seen as a very active voice against this form of parenting. In this case I am actually more inclined to be lukewarm. Ya the Facebook/youtube element was excessive and should STOP happening but the punishment itself is less offensive in my opinion. In general I am a proponent of parenting by motivation and conversation rather than by cause and effect. Both 'Carrot' and 'Stick' ideologies fail in that they don't make the child behave when there is not a prospect of any consequence (pos. or neg.)

HOWEVER, whether through poor parenting in the past or because this is a rare case where a more collaborative parenting style didn't work (or wasn't possible due to other concerns) the situation occurred and some degree of scorched earth defense was needed. We don't know if she tried reward or other techniques first so this may have been what was left. I'm reluctant to judge.

To combat a problem of social life superseding academic concerns, a social consequence is appropriate. The degree is something I take issue with but the idea of engaging her friends to make her social standing take a hit because she didn't attend class makes some degree of sense. I don't think the mother should have made a spectacle but I could see some success coming from this if she had subtly gone to where her daughter was hanging out with friends and made awkward conversation praising the friends for their "bright futures" and showing excitement about the friends' achievements. She could finish with: "I wish [daughter name] would attend classes more; she has so much potential and I'm sorry to see it go to waste. Oh well I guess she'll figure out how to support herself or make a difference in some way or other. " before walking away quietly.
Anyway, keep fighting bad parenting and those who support it. :)
Posted by Eav 2 years ago
Eav
Well, that is certainly the lower end of proper parenting. Every kid needs a a bit of a different kind of problem handling. I'd say a girl that ditches school to go be cool with friends may even need a mom embarrassing her.
The main problem I see, is that mom is not fully aware to what extend she is making a fool out of herself. Going down there and making sure her girl goes into class is embarrassing for the daughter but could serve the purpose. Filming it for Facebook is... overdoing it. And that is, I guess, were mom loses control over her punishment. She is so happily caught up in her play, that she forgets that this actually serves a purposes. I would not deny a mother to have the same playful way of showing a kid off (especially teenagers) like it's considered perfectly acceptable for fathers. But the core of every of these punishments is that you have to make perfectly clear, that you are in full control of these humorous methods.
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