The Instigator
Pro (for)
3 Points
The Contender
Con (against)
3 Points

Joke debate: The NWO will happen very soon...

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Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 9/2/2013 Category: Miscellaneous
Updated: 3 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 1,009 times Debate No: 37278
Debate Rounds (3)
Comments (6)
Votes (2)




Hello, everyone! This is a joke debate used purely by me to allow myself to get away from all of the serious stuff I've been debating recently. So, without further ado, the rules are as follows:
1) First round is acceptance only.
2) Debate must be kept light-hearted.
3) Sources are not required to verify a point.
4) Except for ad homs, logical fallacies will not be considered fallacies.

The most entertaining wins! Allez!


Alright, let's do it.
Debate Round No. 1


Well, well! I thank my opponent for accepting the debate, although he is fighting for a lost cause! Clearly, the NWO (or New World Order, for long) will happen very soon! I will show you why:

1: The Internet.
As we all know, anything that we read on the Internet must be, by its own virtues, the Gospel truth! Well, according to the Internet itself:
The NWO will happen! How much more proof do you want? Oh, you might well say that "the Internet states the the NWO won't happen", but well, have I got new for you? (Yes, I have.)

Due to Occam's Razor, which clearly states that:
"Simpler is better". Which is more simple?
1)The NWO is coming. OR:
2)The NWO isn't coming.

Well, the answer is number one, because number one has not one or two more characters, but THREE more characters. THREE! So clearly, by using the simple logic of Occam's Razor, one is correct.

So the Internet claiming otherwise is nonsense, clearly. Do you know what the Internet states? It states that the NWO will happen, therefore, the NWO will happen. BOOM! Disprove that!

2: My opponent violated the rules!
Clearly, he has! I mean, look at this!

The Internet states that if someone is called a "conspiracy theorist" then that person has been branded as someone who doesn't believe the lies that all our governments tell! So, you have stated, by calling me a conspiracy theorist, that because you have down graded me (calling me "branded") then you have committed an ad hom fallacy! Using an insult as an argument, well I caught you out! Your plot has been foiled, government spy!

Who could withstand such logical coherence?

3: There are symbols everywhere!
The evidence is screaming us in the face! (It's like staring, but with more noise).
The pyramid on the green paper dollar thingy, the ace of spades! All of those sublime messages in the rock stars. How do you think hippies came to be? Those poor souls were brainwashed, man! If you'd only chill, you could see that! Even one of the most esteemed scientists in the field of "High School Scienceology" Dr Kent Hovind, acknowledges it! Who are you to argue with Dr Hovind's authority? Do you have a doctorate?

4: Many, many people believe in it.

According to a new poll from "rejectedpolls.nwo", 98.463542% of world leaders believe in the NWO. AND! AND! 100.1% of people believe in it! Just mull that over. The majority believe in it; why don't you?

I eagerly await my opponent's so called "evidence" that there will be no NWO! And I will be most interested to see how he will apprehend my "exquisite logique"!


I must begin my contrary argument with an apology, that my opponent has picked the wrong side of the argument. And here are my reasons

1: Television
Although the Internet might try and try, everyone knows how to get their hands on a TV: STEAL IT! :)
Once the average joe has successfully committed legal crime, everyone will be able to learn from all the people who have done this necessary act. Which means 200% of the population will be able to defend from the NWO. And inside corruption won't be a problem at all, 'cause who would want to backstab anyone, am I right?
But how does a Television defend from extra corrupt politicians and anyone else. Because of the HISTORY CHANNEL!!! Everyone knows the History Channel can cause enough fear in anyone to hide in a panic room beneath their mom's basement. Which means with 200% of the population owning TVs, the NWO won't come soon due to our perfect and clearly foolproof scheme to scare them away.

2: My opponent thinks so too!
Clearly he does!

A study done by Good Morning America (GMA) shows that 300.32% of the world that believe the NWO is coming are taking an elephants trunk full of cocaine! And drugs are proven to cloud someones thinking, even leading them to accuse others of accusing them, which clearly isn't taking place. This isn't a conspiracy theorist but a poor victim of drug abuse! And you can help him by dialing this number. So I have proved that he doesn't think what he is

So I have proved that he doesn't think what he is saying is true because I am always right, am I right?

3: Symbols don't exist due to the triumphant return of PAYPHONES!!!
Payphones are a great way to call someone when you are lost as long as you have left over change.
But wait, you might ask, how does this tell you how the NWO isn't coming soon.
Well, I'll tell you! Coins all loaded with a banana's bunch of anti potassium!! Potassium is the main ingredient found in dollar bills, and as long as there is more anti potassium than potassium, the NWO cannot attack. And due to the rise of pay phones, the government is minting twice as much coins as dollar bills!! Which means we will all be safe.

4: Because I'm always right, am I right?

I look forward to his rebuttal to my arguments, and my rebuttal to his.
Debate Round No. 2


An apology? This is what the government does time and time again! No one is seeing through these tricks! You'll notice how my opponent's account was formed only in the late evening (BST - or British Standard Time(-travelers), for long) of 09/02/13. Well, two points can be deduced from this:
1) 9 + 2 + 13 is 24, a multiple of not seven! Seven is a lucky number, so my opponent's government clearly chose to form this account on an unlucky day. BUT IT BACKFIRED! Just like Stars Wars episode 3! My opponent's government has cursed itself with failure! Luck is only employed by the unlucky, and the unlucky are bad. Therefore, my opponent is bad. This logic is so easy to see! It is infallible, just like every god. Like every god, you want to be on their side, yes? SO JOIN ME! Join the the FORSE! FORSE(ing the future of the NWO)

2) I mentioned time travelers? My opponent mentioned televisions? Really? Well my opponent has clearly chosen the wrong day to trick the masses. For the NWO has traveled sideways in time to trick my opponent. Just like everyone who disagrees with me, he has been deluded! The History Channel is the NWO headquarters, as many of my amazing voters will know! Look how he puts HISTORY in capitals. Bah! They sent a rookie. Rookie mistake! HISTORY Or: HIS-STORY. My opponent's story which he channels at you! Do not be fooled!

4) Good Morning America.
It has been shown through the Internet that GMA stands for "Get My Anchor-man", not Good Morning America. This Anchor-man is a NWO spy! How can my opponent not see this logic? Simple, he has been paid, PAID, not to see this! Any studies out of that sublime TV show - or that sublime TV for that matter - is pure fabrication! Foolish mortal! My voters will never fall for that! As for my drug problems, they are non-existent drug problems anymore! The blue moon and flying pig told me! So that was refuted as easy as 14-23-15! Which adds up to 52, a multiple of seven! How? Because 5+2=7, of course!

5) No one noticed how I skipped number three or that there has been more than two points, indicating my opponent's perception field to further blind people! If you did notice, then my opponent's grasp is losing, keep it up!

6) And as for this talk of "payphone(s)", or as we logical people like to call them, P(lease) A(ccept) Y(en) P(eople!) H(ow) O(ne) N(ew World Order) E(xist)(S)! You might wonder why accepting yen is relative to the new world order? Clearly, it's for China! Yes, it will begin in China, after the RAP-TURE. (Did you know there is a Chinese RAPper called WenTURE?) This is more proof of sublime messages in the music industry.

1-2-4-5-6) No! You are not always right, as my flawless logic has shown! You cannot win! You have lost!

I will extend all of my contentions; and await your final response(s) before you are hideously obliterated by Wenture the Rapper of Worlds!

Hopefully I have opened eyes! 51st December, 1505 ad2! (Clearly, we read the Mayan Calendar upside down!) Oh, and if you're wondering how the NWO can simultaneously exist both in the future and now. Well, SIDEWAYS TIME TRAVEL. You lose, spy! You lose...


My rebuttal to your first point begins. But first, I must make a rebuttal of your rebuttal. Note that while it is evening for you, here in the Central Time Zone of the good old US of A, it is only mid-afternoon. And everyone knows you aren't a believer of this theory yourself because British Standard Time can stand for:
In time to
Steal Drugs

And yet you still believe you are drug free? Moon aren't blue and pigs can only fly when the NWO comes, which I will prove to be wrong. Coming in 5..4..3..2..1

1: The Internet is a lie!!! All a lie!!!! A LIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I read it on the television, which also has time travel prevention software. Not that time travel is even legal anyway. Because the mere existence of the NWO if they travelled back in time would mean that if I had discovered... Wait, whats that. Is..Is THAT A TIME TRAVEL MACHINE!!!!!!!!!!!!! BUT THAT'S ILLEGAL IN THE U.N. Um, er, I mean, uh, MOVING ON!!!!!

2: We shall examine the simplicity of these two statements side by side

1)The NWO is coming. OR:
2)The NWO isn't coming.

I fear you are mistaken when you believe that #1 is simpler because it would be simpler to not invade than to invade. The reason is to not invade is to let society move on. We, uh, I mean the NWO could sit and do nothing. It would be so easy.
But imagine if that didn't happen, and the NWO is coming. Then they would have to start by sending an agent over to a website called to take the side and unprepare everyone so they wouldn't be ready for the NWO. But I mean that would be a terrible plan, am I right?

3: Staring with more noise isn't screaming. Staring with more noise is a STARING CONTEST!!!
Screaming is what people who don't know what the heck is going on do. People who "might" have the key to what is going on and decide to go to a debate website where he challenges someone who "might" be an NWO agent and "might" be correct about calling him out also scream, but we all know that that person doesn't exist, am I right?

4: I'm bored

5: This rebuttal isn't just evidence.




Debate Round No. 3
6 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 6 records.
Posted by MysticEgg 3 years ago
Damn you, Keller! You'll be sorry! The NWO is coming!

All jokes aside, glad you enjoyed it.
Posted by MysticEgg 3 years ago
Foolish mortal! Sparta is the signal...oh gods...they're here!
Posted by MysticEgg 3 years ago
I just realised it should have been logique exquisite, not
Exquisite logique. Oh well...
Posted by johnlubba 3 years ago
Arghhhhhhhh, The Vampyiceman took it.....Good luck both and hope you have some fun. :)
Posted by MysticEgg 3 years ago
Heh, good point.
Posted by johnlubba 3 years ago
5 rounds is no joke.
2 votes have been placed for this debate. Showing 1 through 2 records.
Vote Placed by Jonathan11 3 years ago
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Total points awarded:30 
Reasons for voting decision: Very good
Vote Placed by donald.keller 3 years ago
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Total points awarded:03 
Reasons for voting decision: Pro and Con did good and had great conduct. decent enough S&G, and no sources. Based of joking along, as this is a joke debate... I'm going to have to say Con wins for me.