Let's get rid of gnats.
Debate Rounds (3)
Friggin gnats. What is their purpose? I mean, I know... they're scavengers bugs which eat up rotting flesh blah blah blah, save me the wikipedia dialogue. They're friggin gnats. Tiny little bugs with tiny little bodies. They'd be flying up in my ears. They'd be flying up in my nose. They'd be flying up in my mouth. They'd be flying up in my eyes. Just disruptive little friggers gettin' all up in my grill. Tryin' to eat my cheddar.
But seriously. Ecosystem. Blah blah blah. We don't need em.
Let em go the way of the dodo birds. Exterminate them friggin gnats. Blowtorch em. Make em drink cyanide. Or whatever it is you do to exterminate an entire race of relatively useless bugs.
But I digress. It's also a good thing that we are mandated to wear clothes in this society because god only knows where else them gnats would be flying.
You have identified a gnat's purpose: scavenger. You have identified their attraction to rotting flesh. I suspect a strong association between rotting flesh and your ears, nose, mouth, eyes, and grill. Perhaps your first line of defense should be personal hygiene. Gnats have limited intelligence. Any similarities between rotting flesh and your cheddar must be addressed and perhaps your gnat aversion will disappear accordingly.
But I like ecosystems, blah blah blah. I have an aquarium. That's an ecosystem that I created. So I deduce: rotting flesh > attract gnats > artificial ecosystem. Boom.
Gnats are important for the world, so instead of destroying them (which would be impractical), I will propose a Gnat Ecosystem Management System (or NEMS for short) which I will describe in the next argument and defend in round 3.
The gnats haunt my dreams and my reality. They must perish.
I empthize with your loss. But this issue isn't as black-and-white as a decomposing zebra.
My Gnat Ecosystem Management System (or NEMS for short) is designed to prey upon the gnat's natural instincts and appetite for rotting flesh. No gnat can resist foul odors eminating from noses, mouths, ears, and hair-care products.
I'm sharing with you my Gnat Ecosystem Management System (or NEMS for short) prototypes, ready for roll-out this summer as the gnats begin to breed in American suburbia.
Place one of these Gnat Ecosystem Management System (or NEMS for short) into your yard. Gnats are automatically drawn to these like Japanese Beetles to those green catheter bag things. The Gnat Ecosystem Management System (or NEMS for short) are covered with toxic chemicals only found in Trump's hair and Hillary's makeup. It is 99.999% effective at destroying gnats that come in contact, without harming the environment or the global gnat population.
I can't help your dreams but I pray you can find peace.
U.n forfeited this round.
Darwin was right, God hates whiny zebras.
1 votes has been placed for this debate.
Vote Placed by Chrysippus 9 months ago
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Reasons for voting decision: A quality debate, and sturdily argued by both sides. Well done! Normally, I would award conduct to Con because Pro forfeited his last round; however, he had already made as much sense as he was ever likely to; the lack of a round did not significantly affect his arguments. Arguments goes to Con for the comparison between his opponent and rotting meat. Sources also to Con, I found that image particularly compelling evidence for his case. Also: the only source used or needed.
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