Rap Battle 2: Lwerd vs. Vi

== Intro ==

Welcome to Battle 2 (which is really my first) with my wonderful opponent, Vi_Veri. I'd like to thank her for accepting this challenge and joining me in battle, as well as feverish for hosting this tournament and Mangani for judging. Also, thanks to everyone else who's participating -- can't wait to face you all -- and to those cool enough to respond with positive feedback and constructive criticism.

== Auxiliary Issues ==

1. I'm aware that this is more of a rap than a battle. I did that intentionally.

2. I would have recorded this with a webcam so I could have done something interesting with the presentation, but unfortunately my mic sucks. I downloaded this program to help with sound quality but I know it's not the best anyway. Besides, Philosophical's R1 presentation in his battle with Omelet was too much for me to handle... I don't know if I could be that cool!

3. Lol @ the random Biggie interjection in the song <3

== Lyrics ==

Hey pretty baby what'chu doing in this tournament?
Don't you know you're just for show like my ornament?
I'm the real MC; you just look good next to me
So don't forlorn a hint; I was born to spit
And you were born to look good
Get yourself a cap, Red Riding, so you know what it's like to be hood
Yeah you might like writing rap but you don't know Hip Hop
Me, I'm not a gangsta but I can hit your G-Spot
When I get your knees locked
Ya now I find a tease hot
Sleazy with degrees rocked
Not easy do these b's spot
Best sex in threes, shocked?
Cooler than the breeze, ma
We kick it like Reeboks
Flow's ill but no disease, nah
I like your double D's bra
Trouble when my freeze thaws
D's law's to get you up and down
Like a see-saw til you scream, "Please, Lawd!"
(Cuz my sexpertise raw)

I love it when you give me a massage
To the homies who know me giving Biggie an homage

I love it when you kiss me down my spine
To the girls I made squirm to confirm I am fine

I love it when you lick between my thighs
So don't stick on a disguise to win this rap prize

[ Cuz I see some ladies tonight that should be having my baby... baby ]

First and foremost let's be clear on my intentions
Roast the competition then get you honorable mention
Cuz simple comprehension's enough to note ascension
Of me over thee and anyone in between
You're lovely but I'm a lyrical machine
The Queen on this scene
Princess, you'll win less; pray for a miracle dream
The tension between us is unnecessary
So fvck the attention - get to undressing me already
I'm so dope that I made you a fiend
Let's hope that you're clean
Cuz I dunno if you heard me but tonight we're getting dirty
I'm glad that you're curvy and I know that you're purty
It's just too bad that your raps are unworthy
So Vi, why you here b? I thought I already told ya
And I'm not a liar, I'm the rider - you're the roller
I'm this DDO rap game nations sole owner
I'll finger you like a Playstation controller

I love it when you give me a massage
To the homies who know me giving Biggie an homage

I love it when you kiss me down my spine
To the girls I made squirm to confirm I am fine

I love it when you lick between my thighs
So don't stick on a disguise to win this rap prize

[ Cuz I see some ladies tonight that should be having my baby... baby ]

I'm thinking I'm the bomb and that's why I vote like one
Kidding - I like getting people's panties in a bunch
You should know that I'm good at that; I'm glad you're no hooded rat
Matter of fact, I take it back: get some blunts - help these kids RELAX
Cuz they're hating's only compensating whatever it is they lack
So they can kindly mind they biz to keep their shiz in tact
Pop quiz: Who tops this? Only you when I'm on my back!
So forget needing - I'm all that you could ever want
I'm so good at eating out you'd swear I own a restaurant
And I promise no evil whore's next
I love your body and your cerebral cortex
No need to copy my style for some shoddy vile vex
Don't forget: I don't want nobody; I just wanna kiss down your neck
Check: I don't mean no disrespect and don't you second guess
This battle's only sloppy cuz I just want your sex

Because you pulled a Biggie, the most suitable way to combat it is with a Tupac :)

Some Info:

Italian translations:

Vinci = I win

Si perde = You lose

Corona reference -- sun's outer layer is called a Corona -- translation "Crown"

Enjoy

--- Lyrics ---

INTRO:

How your words curl, you sound so cute, I'm impressed
But I only need to look at you, girl, and you get undressed

CUE MUSIC:

Hey there sexy, I'm Vi
Now please don't be nervous
Is my name ringing a bell?
That's cuz you give me service
Call this a warning or it'll have to be a repeat
going easy on me mirrors the day we did meet
You were loudly spent, forget about discreet
I got a wink at the check out, had to pay for the dent
Show me like an ornament, Yeah baby I'm the star
With an iced out corona and a spliced up cigar
Slipped in your slot, thought you were coin operated
Flipped you heads or tails, you sure as hell cooperated
either way, babe, you're on your knees
doin' whatever it is I please
I'd tell the crowd the rest, but unfortunately it's X-Rated
so back to you bein' my b1tch
hell yeah you ridin' me, on my lap- I'm the rolla'
it's hard to drive and you wont let me pull over
I'll leave you Reeboks, I'll be lacin' up Adidas
"Impossible is nothing" when against your "Freestyle"
An answer to your question: You're the reason I'm here, Ma
To present the confession, and yeah I'm bein' sincere, Ma
Quid pro quo, Pro - you sold out, dear, and I'm here to take DDO
Remember it's only business, so get to bein' my secretary and blow--
Oh!
you know it's hard to record when doin' me in the studio
I score so easy, you should call me a free throw
That's right baby, I got you on your back and I'll nail
all the right buttons, I deliver faster than email
Here in the Chi we do it harder, better, faster, stronger
The reason why you couldn't stay in Brooklyn any longer
Yes, Baby, I was mafia from a very early age
drove a different car every day, never had to earn a wage
That's the original gangsta, different money, same ways
Your type blow snow, while my people blow J.F.K
"Vinci"? No, "si perde", I'll have to disagree
I have you up against the wall like the N.Y.P.D.
Doesn't look good, seems you're in a rough place
This is the easiest way to say it, I know it's hard to face
Your not so dope, at best your rhymes are bourgeois
I know why they call you L, and it's cuz I'm smoken yah

OUTRO:

No need for tension, just gimmie the gold and take your bronze
Stay classy New York, gentlemen prefer complacent blonds

With many apologies to my opponent and everyone else, I will not be able to post another round at this time.

Challenge me to a 1 round debate with your next round.