The Instigator
imabench
Pro (for)
Winning
1 Points
The Contender
Merrit
Con (against)
Losing
0 Points

Resolved: All Middle Eastern nations should be reformed into one nation called 'Islamistan'

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Post Voting Period
The voting period for this debate has ended.
after 1 vote the winner is...
imabench
Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 8/20/2013 Category: Politics
Updated: 3 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 866 times Debate No: 36851
Debate Rounds (3)
Comments (7)
Votes (1)

 

imabench

Pro

This debate is to focus on whether or not all middle eastern nations (Israel, Saudi Arabia, Lebanon, Turkey, Syria, Iraq, Iran, Oman, Qatar, Yemen, Egypt, Afghanistan, and Pakistan) SHOULD become one nation called 'Islamistan', not whether or not such a thing can be done. It is implied that it is plausible for all these nations to be united as one.

First round acceptance only.

4000 character limit.
Merrit

Con

I accept.
Debate Round No. 1
imabench

Pro

Reasons why all middle east nations should be united into one called 'Islamistan'

1) It would make it easier for the US to invade them

We have all this hub-a-baloo about whether we should or shouldnt invade in places like Iran, Syria, Egypt, Yemen, etc for a multitude of reasons, mainly that it would alienate other Middle Eastern nations. However, if all mideast nations were united into one country, then the US wouldnt have to worry about annoying other mideast nations when we decide to invade it for whatever reason the US has.

2) It would make geography classes a lot easier.

Most idiots that surround you in high school likely cannot find Lebanon on a map, or Syria, or Yemen, or Oman, or Qatar, etc. However, if all of those nations nobody cares about were united into one massive nation called 'Islamistan' that was located right smack in the Middle East, then those high school idiots have a much better chance of knowing where to find it on a map and there would be some hope for humanity. It would also make it a lot easier for the US to bomb it without restraint but Ive already covered that.

3) Once they all become one big country, we can take their oil!

The Middle East is responsible for over half of the world's supply of oil (http://en.wikipedia.org...) which means if the US invades them for that oil..... lol, 'if'. I meant to say WHEN the US invades it for their oil, then once we take over the region WE will have 50% of the worlds oil! Can you imagine how cheap gas will be once we have 50% of the worlds oil??? Hell it would be like 30 cents a GALLON!!!!!

4) Overthrowing their government and replacing it with the one that we want

Once the US does invade and subsequently conquer the new nation, we can set up a new democracy in Islamistan and depose whatever ruler was there before, thus spreading Democracy or whatever! Then if we dont like who they choose to lead them (probable) we can do what the US does best and invade them again for their oil, or whatever, I dunno what Ill excuse will be but we'll find one, im sure.

5) No more threats of nukes

Once they have become their own nation and we have invaded and overran them, there wont be any more nuke threats because the leader they elect would be a puppet of the US! You think Iraq or Afghanistan wants to pursue building nukes? Of course not! Because nations only build nukes to prevent us from invading them, and if we have ALREADY invaded them and they lost then they would not want to build nukes, which means that problem will be solved once-and-for-at least 3 years.

6) Drones away!

Terrorism is the backbone of US foreign policy, or it might be 'fighting' terrorism, I forget which. But we cant drone attack nations that we are not at war with and havent already invaded because its considered 'immoral' or 'a breach of international law' or something gay like that. BUT if they all become one nation and we have already invaded it, then there will be nothing to limit our use of drone warfare to kill terrorists! (Plus the 30 innocent people standing nearby the terrorists too!)
Merrit

Con

Pro states that middle Easter countries should unite and form one nation called "Islamistan." I do not think this was well thought through. Instead, the middle eastern countries should unite to become "Imabenchland," lead by almighty imabench.

To begin, neither would be easier to invade. Middle eastern nations uniting would just create more territory for US troops to cover. If they were united, when you invade, you annoy a HUGE nation not just one or two. But why would Imabenchland be better? Because with Imabench in power, there won't have to have invading, as imabench is pro-US.

Second, Imabenchland would have the same effect on geography. Therefore, this point is negated, as it favors both.

Third, with imabench in power of Imabenchland, imabench would give the US the oil. This is better than the Islamistan model because it makes obtaining the oil a lot easier, with less resistance.

Fourth, imabench is the person in power that we want.

Fifth With Imabenchland, not only are there less nuke threats, Imabench will give the US any nukes the middle easy might have.

Sixth, Imabench will take care of terrorists for us instead of drones, which are very high matinence.

Seventh, Israel is a Jewish state, not Islamic. There are Muslims there, but mostly Jews. Obviously, islamistan would be a religious theocracy, so why would it be called Islamistan if everyone isn't Muslim?

Eighth, Imabenchland would be awesome.
Debate Round No. 2
imabench

Pro

"I do not think this was well thought through. Instead, the middle eastern countries should unite to become "Imabenchland," lead by almighty imabench."

............................. Go on...................

"But why would Imabenchland be better? Because with Imabench in power, there won't have to have invading, as imabench is pro-US"

............................. Go on...................

"Third, with imabench in power of Imabenchland, imabench would give the US the oil. "

AHAHAHAHHA, Are you out of your mind?!?!?!? If im sitting on just over 50% of the world's oil then im not simply going to turn all of that over to the US, Im going to turn that into the greatest money maker ever seen in history! Im going to need all that money too if im going to have enough cash to raise all the children that I conceive with my 300+ wives that I plan on wedding. Plus the boats, the planes, the tv's, etc all cost money which im only going to have to get through oil exports.





"Fifth With Imabenchland, not only are there less nuke threats, Imabench will give the US any nukes the middle easy might have."

Well I wouldnt GIVE all of them over to the US, id probably just sell them off to the highest bidder since im a firm believer in capitalism...... Im also a firm believer in fiscal responsibility so I would also only sell nukes to nations who dont have a crippling national debt, which I guess kinda negates the US out of any bidding. China is doing pretty well, maybe theyll be interested in a couple hundred nukes......





"Seventh, Israel is a Jewish state, not Islamic. There are Muslims there, but mostly Jews"

If Jews become a problem we can just send them to Florida and New York, im pretty sure that the Jews own those states by now anyways.

"Eighth, Imabenchland would be awesome."

Well that cant be disputed so, I concede that argument.



============================================================================================



Even though I would love to be the undisputed dictator of the entire Middle East and own half of the world's oil, I would probably be a massive dick of a ruler, and by probably i mean its a certainty....... I can say for sure I wouldnt simply hand the keys of my empire over to the US and that if they want my oil they are going to have to pay for it just like everyone else does..... Maybe ill jack up oil prices to $10 a gallon just to make that much more money, im gonna need it if im going to build by Islamic Death Star by the year 2050.......

Point is that it would be better for all these nations to be united into Islamistan rather than Imabenchland because Islamistan wouldnt jack oil prices up to $10 a gallon just for money, or forcefully move all the Jews in Israel back to Florida + New York, or sell a thousand nukes to China like I would in my kingdom of Imabenchland
Merrit

Con

Merrit forfeited this round.
Debate Round No. 3
7 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 7 records.
Posted by toinfinityandbeyond 3 years ago
toinfinityandbeyond
Yup I realized that
Posted by imabench 3 years ago
imabench
I am kidding you dingus, this is a troll debate
Posted by toinfinityandbeyond 3 years ago
toinfinityandbeyond
I really hope Pro is kidding about his argument.
Posted by leandro.sanchez 3 years ago
leandro.sanchez
egypt isnt part of the middel east
Posted by imabench 3 years ago
imabench
Thats a problem for Islamistan to figure out, not mine
Posted by Wocambs 3 years ago
Wocambs
Would the leader be a Caliph or an Ayatollah?
1 votes has been placed for this debate.
Vote Placed by Bullish 3 years ago
Bullish
imabenchMerritTied
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Total points awarded:10 
Reasons for voting decision: Imabench 2013.