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The_Fox
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Marauder
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Short Story Battle

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Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 4/22/2012 Category: Arts
Updated: 4 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 1,373 times Debate No: 23073
Debate Rounds (3)
Comments (17)
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The_Fox

Pro

Basically this isn't really a debate, its a creative thing to do though.

First round would be acceptance only.

The following two rounds would be Short Stories of any kind.

People vote on their favorite author and put the title of their favorite story in the voter comment box.
Marauder

Con

I accept!
Debate Round No. 1
The_Fox

Pro

Okay, First off, Thank you for accepting this debate, I look forward to seeing your writing.
Begin....

Title: ESCAPE

It was a quite summer morning, and the sun was just starting to rise in the sky when Eric Johnson decided to go for a walk. As Eric walked down Demerest Drive he was looking around carefully, suspiciously even, for you see Eric wasn't only on a walk, he was also scouting the neighborhood for any sign of the police. 'Why would anyone be scouting for police?' you ask. Well, you see Eric wasn't just any ordinary citizen, no, he was a criminal, a murderer, and if you ever asked him why he killed he would probably say, "I don't kill for money or reward, only for pleasure." Yes, Eric Johnson was a sinister man indeed.

Eric Johnson was tall, with a sun burnt face and a mouth of yellow stained teeth. His breath, they said, smelled like rotting oysters, and his hair was slicked back and oily. He's been on every news station, paper, and special report for the past 6 months. So why was he out here now in broad daylight, looking for cops no less? Simple, Eric always liked a challenge and today just happened to be his lucky day, or was it?

"You there, stop" said an out of breath cop as he ran down the street toward Eric.

Perfect, a cop, just what Eric was hoping he would find. He started to run, running as fast as he could to the man as he slowly drew a knife from a sheath on his belt, and as he drew closer to the man he froze. Sirens are what froze the Eric, backup that this out of breath cop must of called for, Eric could take down one cop and get away, no problem, but who knows how man is coming now. light on his feet Eric turned and ran as fast as he could back to his house, if he could get there his problem would be solved. Eric finally did get home a few minutes before the cops and instantly started hooking up cords and hoses. Eric ran into the attic and frantically looked for something, pushing boxes, spilling bins until finally he came up with a remote in his hand when he heard.

"Come out with your hands up," it was the Chief of police with a donut in one hand (which must be what took so long for him to get here) and a mega phone in the other.

"Oh, but officer, I think you forgot about the direction... Up." As he said this with a very amusing laugh that rung out across the neighborhood he hit the button on the remote. The earth its self started to shake, car alarms went off, smoke started to billow out from the bottom house. Gun fire went wild as the cops shot red hot bullets through the cloud of smoke and towards the house. Then the house started to lift off the ground it jutted away from Demerest Drive and up towards the sky.

Eric was going up higher and higher, away from the police, away from Demerest Drive, away from the world itself. ‘Ping' that's all Eric heard when his house started to tilt and slowly headed not up, but down farther and farther down until he hit the ground in a huge explosion of dust and wood. Eric got up, the dust making his eyes water, and in his throat he coughed and gasped for air with little prevail until he passed out.

Eric awoke to find his house scattered around him, unrecognizable as a house, looking more like just a pile of scrap wood, glass, and tubing. Eric looked around to find some clue as to were he was only to find a sign that said, ‘Folsom maximum-security prison' that's when a cop walked up, the same cop that had been out side his house with the donut which really made Eric wonder how he got here so fast, and said, with a smirk across his lips.

"Welcome to prison son, I think you'll really like it here,"

The End
Marauder

Con


My first short story is one of political intrigue, and my primary characters are based on superheroes from both DC and Marvel comics. I have changed the names because A: I don’t own any of said characters I want to use and B: while it’s a fan fiction of sorts Batman lives in DCU and Iron Man lives in Marvel-U, so they would never meet, but here in Marauder-U very similar characters histories happened in the same relm so its just easier to change the names. This story isn’t really about their characters anyway so its not that important anyway. Now that that’s out of the way……


Rise of the Caped Oligarchy


An indefinite time ago in a far far away dimension, was a world who’s history was very much like ours….except it had Superheroes. In the earlier chapters of the world’s history extraordinary beings weather honestly human or not did exist but they stayed under the radar for most of history not wanting to draw upon themselves a raciest hatred for who they are. Until one day Uberman arrived on the scene. He was the first superhuman to come up with the idea to where a cape and create an alter-ego


This idea was later adopted by even non-meta-humans after Uberman started the trend. Dragonman being the first who was just a wealthy individual driven for justice like no else that he focused his every thought and aspect of his life in such away that it would put Sherlock Holmes orderliness to shame.


The Iron Dynamo was non-meta-human superhero. He was a incredible inventor and a genius although he was not driven like the Dragonman. That is until the day he was captured by terrorist and was forced to create a suite that made obsolete near all conventional military weapons. He did the hero thing in private with it for while but the Government eventually figured out who he was and pressured him in a public hearing to hand over the designs and start making the armor for them.


Many just remember his words as some cocky stubborn when he refused but if any had been paying attention they would have seen how the following statement foreshadowed the fundamental shift starting to take place in society.


“I know you want it but you cant have it because it is mine, but hey I did you all a big favor. I just successfully privatized world peace!”


The Capes of course never consciously fought to undermine their governments, they fought to protect the status quo, to uphold the law. But This all changed after the incident. After the invasion.



The Invasion of earth was 2 part. Part one a shapeshifting race called the Sleslak had covertly infiltrated and replaced normal humans at near every level of society’s infrastructure. The President had been replaced by a Sleslak, so had the majority of congress, the judicial system, police on local and national levels, media newscasters, wallstreet ceo’s. When they revealed themselves society began to break into chaos as they prepared to go to war with what was left of earth with only the caped heroes standing in there way who they were unable to replace.


The caped heros defeated the Sleaslak but there was a second part to the invasion even they did Sleslak had not seen coming. There whole operation was masterminded by another alien with almost Godlike powers; Omegaside. After the Sleslak had eliminated earths leaders of any kind and put a strain on the caped heroes Omegaside was prepared to conquer earth. He was stronger than almost every hero on the planet and all failed to stop him….except for the Uberman. He matched Omegaside blow for blow and in the end they both died, the surviving heroes forever remembering Ubermans sacrifice.


With no human world leaders the Heroes had to do something fast to restore order to the chaos. Dragonman and Iron Dynamo steped up. Dragonman had for some years before the invasion began to establish Dragonman inc. an organization where he trains, funds, and commands capes all around the world wearing his logo. They were at the ready to replace some of societies lost infrastructure after the invasion was over.


Iron Dynamo meanwhile had been funding and heading what he called ‘the initiative’ where he was training superhumans everywhere to make them part of teams of 5 to that each state would have as its own set of heroes.


Between Iron Dynamos Initiative and Dragonman Inc the heroes where able to keep society from falling apart filling in for the needs of all the lost infrastructure.


While the normal humans had every reason to be grateful for that turn of events, from then on unless you had superpowers or enough raw intellect and talent to pull off being a caped crime fighter, you would never advance to positions of political power or influence in the future, for all infrastructure was provided by the Global network of superhuman leagues. Any who gained the ability to take the power from them, became one of them in the gaining. Thus Democracy had fallen…..and in its ashes rose the Superhero Oligarchy.


Debate Round No. 2
The_Fox

Pro

The creativity is really amazing and I'm so glad I did this. I love Marvel and DC so I have to give you a super thank you for a super hero story. Anyways its time for those last two stories, one from me, and one from Marauder. This story is about sibling rivalry. Everyone has experienced it even if they don't have siblings, but this story is more medieval and a lot more is at stake.

Title: New Age

Long ago in the kingdom of Wonk there was a great King and Queen, they were fair and just and everyone loved them very much, but sadly they were gone often on business. The King and Queen had two sons Zaltar, the eldest son, and Eric the youngest. Zaltar was 24 and about to take the crown on his 25th birthday, but until then he practiced spells, potion, and all other magic. While Eric was in training to be a great, peaceful knight.�

One day while the King and Queen were out Zaltar started up to his usual ways, he went through out the kingdom screaming and shouting, threatening anyone who dared to speak his mind. While Zaltar was busy punishing two young peasants who had dared to look at him Eric decided that the kingdom did not deserve the terrible treatment that they were given and

"I shall stand for this no more� foul brother, the kingdom must be free," Eric yelled out with pride and bravery in his voice, "As long as I shall live you will not become king."�

Zaltar turned to his brother with a sinister smirk across her face, "And what makes you think you can challenge my power you paladin?"�

"I am a Prince too, and therefore, I have the right to challenge you for the thrown" yelled� Eric from across the great castles' courtyard.

"Bring it you revolting savage," yelled back Zaltar.

That is when Eric started to charge, but right before he struck, Zaltar pulled out his wand and with just a flick of the wrist Eric was frozen solid.

"I told you brother, you cant beat me" said Zaltar devilishly.

Then, from the depth of the ice, came a roar, "You can not beat me Zaltar, I shall be the next king, not you." and then the ice started to crack and steam came up from the frozen Eric as the ice quickly melted away, and then Eric swung his sword and the evil Zaltar, to stunned, and amazed to react, was quickly killed as his severed head rolled along the ground at his feet, Zaltar's body fell to its knees and started to turn to stone.�

Then Eric looked up and found that the King and Queen had returned and were shocked by what the saw, as they yelled and scolded Eric the peasants rejoiced in freedom and the knights shouted in glee. That is when the King and Queen realized that Zaltar must have been very cruel indeed, and Eric was the one to bring the a new age to the land of Wonk
Marauder

Con


The Prelude to my second that you need to know is Ethan has superpowers, there a lot like Danny Phantoms in that they are like Ghost powers, but his adventures get him tangled up in dealing with demons and angles instead of ghost. His Newest best friend Lol (a name I stole—ahem--- I mean borrowed from star treck) knows about his powers to a limited extent (that he’s fought demons with them)


any this episode in Ethans life has no fighting or action in it. This short story is about his personal life and a unique situation knowledge from his ‘super’ life has put him in, at least he thinks it does….. just read to find out what I could be talking about.


-----------------------------------


Somthing I Read in Book....


Lol finally asked, “aren’t, you gona go talk to her?” Considering who he was just thinking about, and the timing of when Lol asked that question, he figured he knew who she meant, but there was no logical way Lol would know, so he feigned ignorance so as to find out more on just what Lol thought she knew first. If you are not careful around her, she could trick you into telling her about whatever she pretended to already know. “Who?” Ethan asked. “Emily” she said.


“No” he responded.


After a pause he added


“You’re question’s have never been totally random before, why do you ask?”


“Though you very skillfully only casually glance her way, if I’m quiet you clearly drift off into thought, sprung from whatever you were staring at as a catalyst”


At least she was making it easy for him to argue her thought.


“I could be looking at anything over there”


“Yeah, but you don’t like outright lying to me and your still being defensive about what you were staring at. So why not talk to her?”


He would never win. But he still didn’t want to tell Lol why not, because if there was one person he would care if they thought him to be insane it was Lol. Ethan had come to respect her two cents. On the other hand, if there was one person he could tell this to and they might understand, it was her.


She was waiting for his response, probably eliminating possible “why’s” in her head even now. He decided to go ahead and tell her.


“You know I’ve had these powers for about a year now?” he started


“Yeah”


“Well last year I came across a…book, by means related to these abilities.”


She waited.


“It was explained to me that it contained the names of all the people who were destined for each other, set aside since before creation. Our Soul mates”


To Ethan’s relief she didn’t question who it was that explained it two him, he didn’t feel like defending that he had seen an angle.


“And you peeked to see what was next to your name?”


“Yes” he said, a little ashamed that he tried to find out, but not sure why


“What was the name?”


“I don’t know, I was stopped before I got to mine, but not before I passed by hers, and it was not next to mine”


Though Lol knew of his powers, he didn’t know how skeptical she’d be about angles. To his surprise, her first question had nothing to do with weather such a book could actually exist, or if he simple had a vision or “dream” that didn’t quite bear on reality, but instead…


“What’s her middle name?” Lol asked after a moment or two had passed.


“I don’t know, why?” Ethan responded.


“You said you saw her name in the book, didn’t it show her full name.”


“Come to think of it I’m not sure, but am sure I saw her first and last name, I don’t know her middle name so I wasn’t looking for it.”


“And you think she’s the only Emily with that surname in the world, and that’s just assuming this book only shows the ‘currently living’ that are set aside for each other?”


“Well, uh…, I guess she’s not, it must have slipped my mind to inquire about that when this happened.”


“AND you just gave up on this girl you’ve had a crush on when you didn’t read enough to know for sure that name referenced her?!” she said incredulously.


He was beginning to feel a little embarrassed for not being able to answer her questions, but at the same time felt a spark of hope arise that he might not have to let go of his desire to be around Emily. But then he remembered his conversation with Raphael and that spark went out as fast as it came on.


“Yeah…But…from what was said to me by the…’being’ that stoped me…” Ethan started.


“being, do you mean like an angle?” she interjected quickly.


“Well, yeah, and he seemed to indicate I was right that her name was not next to mine”, It was after he said this that she asked him a kind of question he was not expecting from her.


“Even if that book gave her social security number leaving no doubt who its referring to, you are not taking into account free will.” She said


“What?” said Ethan. And then as she said what she had to say next her speech gained passion with each passing word.


“God gave man freewill at his creation, a gift not to take lightly or abuse. And the idea that you are ‘predestined’ to be with someone is not scriptural, or something that our just god would do, because then the soles that will suffer eternal fire were designed from the start to suffer that punishment, rather than it be something that they earned from disobedience by choice.”


He was caught off guard by what she said, she never said anything until now that showed she believed in god, or that she knew scripture. However he was not as well ‘versed’ as her, and did not know in detail how the scripture outline what she just said. Ethan guessed it sounded right, and he was about ready to agree with her, but he knew what he saw.


“Lol….I know what I saw was real, and that it was of those set aside for each other, so I don’t know what I can say about being destined for hell, but at least for your ‘soul mate’ it would seem…” Ethan didn’t even have to finish that sentence before Lol was ready to retort it.


“I’m not saying the book you saw was not real. You said it was of those ‘set aside’ for each other. ‘set aside’ and ‘destined’ are not the same thing. I can ‘set aside’ some of my time for you so I can help you study for a test, but before you come over to make use of the time, you decide that you have to go fight a demon. You always had a choice, you could have rejected studying at all, or ignore your responsibility to deal with that demon and still come to study. But just because you chose to or not to make use of my time that dose not change the fact that I set that time aside for you. And likewise it’ll be because of your choice that you never talk to her, not because she wasn’t set aside for you.” Lol finished.



Ethan shifted where he was sitting as Lol’s words sank in. That book did say “set aside” specifically. He was still hesitant to embrace that ment it was okay to try and talk to her though but while he was thinking that over Lol had without his notice pulled one of his binders out of his book bag and threw across the floor until it slid near Emily.



Lol looked at him with an impatient face “Well go, I pretty much removed your excuses”


Ethan got up and slowly made his way to get his binder, He guessed Lol had forced his hand, he was about to really go and do this…..


Debate Round No. 3
17 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 10 records.
Posted by The_Fox 4 years ago
The_Fox
lol okay, and yes it caused the ice to melt from his super awesomeness... my I should have made it crack and shatter or something... hmmmmm...
Posted by Marauder 4 years ago
Marauder
I had guessed you were going for rocket power from the description of the smoke, I just couldn't help but think of balloons though after having seen the up movie.
Posted by Marauder 4 years ago
Marauder
what caused the ice to melt?
Posted by The_Fox 4 years ago
The_Fox
interesting story. I'm a huge fan of comics so I really liked that you did super hero's. well good job and can't wait till the next story.
Posted by The_Fox 4 years ago
The_Fox
I was going for rocket power, but I guess if you thought it sounded more like balloon power then that's fine... as long as it made you imagine something
Posted by Marauder 4 years ago
Marauder
while the story I just posted was fun to think up and write, the next one will be way better for this story challenge. it actually will be about the characters, have dialog, little to no fake history narration. so if you were disappointed with my first the next you will probably like way better.
Posted by Marauder 4 years ago
Marauder
question: in your first story did the convicts house fly up by rocket power or was it with balloons like in the movie "UP"?
Posted by The_Fox 4 years ago
The_Fox
Agreed. if and when I do this in the future I will remember a fourth round just for such a thing... thanks for bringing it to my attention. It really is a good idea
Posted by Marauder 4 years ago
Marauder
Oh, well in that case forget I suggested it, to proper include a debate aspect I guess one would have to have fourth round from the very start reserved just for a case to promote ones story over the other. perhaps another story challenge for another time...
Posted by The_Fox 4 years ago
The_Fox
okay thanks for accepting hope you have fun
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