The Instigator
person_16
Pro (for)
Losing
27 Points
The Contender
wingnut2280
Con (against)
Winning
32 Points

Spare the rod, spoil the child.

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Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 12/21/2007 Category: Society
Updated: 6 years ago Status: Voting Period
Viewed: 10,649 times Debate No: 752
Debate Rounds (3)
Comments (8)
Votes (17)

 

person_16

Pro

I've recently been to a dinner/birthday party for a dear friend of my family, and the evening would have been quite lovely if his evil grandchildren weren't there. Seriously, they were total brats. They screamed and fought, pretended to shoot the waitress with imaginary guns, spat at the people sitting at the table, and one of them kept yanking on his uncle's shirt, hitting him, cursing, and saying "I hate you, you're ugly!"

And all their mother did was say "Shh, behave." If I were their mother, I would have back-handed them a long time ago. I'll bet they've never been spanked in their entire time of existing. How can she expect them to behave if she never disciplines them?
wingnut2280

Con

I would hope we are at a point as a society where corporal punishment is deemed unjust and unnecessary.

Parenting is a multi-billion dollar industry. Each network has its own nanny show where kids are disciplined and behave well without being beaten. This proves there are countless effective alternatives to beating your kids.

That being said, we should not result to beating our kids because it can traumatize them, have ill-health effects and is just, straight up, immoral.

There is also no reason to believe beating your kids is an effective parenting method or any more effective than other methods.

Maybe her kids were terrible because she is an apathetic mom.
Debate Round No. 1
person_16

Pro

Let me just start in saying that "spanking" and "beating" a child are two different things. Spanking is not necessarily a traumatic expirience, and a parent should be able to discipline his/her own children, no matter how "advanced" society has become. The kids were annoying and terrible. The mother wanted with them to stop, but she won't get any results if all she does is plead with them.

The parent should have authority over their child, especially if they're unruly. Otherwise, they'll end up as trouble-makers, or the back-wash of society. Or they'll get their a$$ kicked on a regular basis in high school.

Allow me to also say that beating your child is abuse, and is illegal. There is no law against disciplining your child.
wingnut2280

Con

You draw a fine line. But, OK, I'll change my terminology.

I agree a parent should have the right to disciplne their child. I agree that pleading with the kids, probably would have gotten her no where.

Despite this, you answer virtually none of my assertions.

First, you don't give me a reason why spanking a child will make them behave. In my limited experience, children who spank end up causing a bigger scene and a more disruptive child, not to mention awkward looks from the dinner guests. Again, we have no reason to believe spanking leads to better behavior.

Next, the alternatives. There are whole sections of book stores, whole companies whose sole dedication is effective parenting technique. This means that there are numerous viable and effective alternatives to spanking.

Then, we have the reasons why we shouldn't spank. Despite the fact that spanking is less traumatizing than full-out beating your kids, it does have negative psychological effects on the child. This study shows that kids who are spanked are six times more likely to engage in physical violence later in life and eleven times more likely to become a juvenille delinquent (http://books.google.com...=). Not only that, children who are spanked are more likely to be psychologically disfunctional or anti-social. In addition to these effects on the child, it is just morally unjust to strike your child, whether its minor and in the name of discipline or not.

So, we shouldn't hit our kids because it damages them, is immoral, and we have no reason to think it works. We definately shouldn't spank our kids when there are so many non-violent alternatives to it that don't cause these consequences. Parents should have the right to discipline their children, just not physically.
Debate Round No. 2
person_16

Pro

My debate is NOT about spanking!

My debate is discipline! I'm not saying she should slap her kids around in public. I'm saying she should take charge and not be so lax about her children's bad behavior. "Spare the rod," is not litteral. Heavens. no! Don't beat your kids with a rod! I just took a quote from Scripture because I thought it was an appropriate title for the debate I'm presenting.

In Round 2 I was just arguing against your statement about beating kids. I was spanked when I did something wrong and I'm not psychologically tormented.

I'm just worried that these kids might end up worse in the future. Given my background and upbringing, if I never learned discipline, I might have gone down the path my biological parents did. That's my personal expirience, and I thank my adoptive parents in the long run. But again, it's not about spanking; it's teaching your kids respect.
wingnut2280

Con

I think you are trying to wriggle out of the debate here. I don't see how "I would have back-handed them a long time ago. I'll bet they've never been spanked in their entire time of existing. How can she expect them to behave if she never disciplines them?" is advocating anything other than corporal punishment, whatever you want to call it. If you meant something else (which I don't think is the case) you should have been clearer in both rounds of the debate. That being said, I think it is obvious by the first two rounds and the topic itself that even though you don't advocate child abuse, you are obviously still in favor of corporal punishment.

Just because you were spanked and turned out "alright" doesn't mean that that is true for the overwhelming majority of spanked kids. There are countless studies, some of which I cited earlier, that show the extent of the damage spanking induces.

And, there are countless alternatives to physically hurting your child, in any way, spanking or otherwise. Look at the billion dollar a year industry that is parenting. The Furber method and others all prove to be more effective and don't involve hitting your kids.

I realize that you don't advocate beating the living hell out of your kids. But, obviously, physical action of ANY kind is harmful, unnecessary and inappropriate. Keep in mind, we don't even have reason to believe that risking these bad effects has any counterweight. We have been offered no reason why spanking actually leads to better behavior, especially over the long run.

So, whatever you advocate, physically harming your kids for whatever purpose is harmful to them, ineffective, and morally impermissable, especially in a time when there are so many modern, non-violent alternatives. Thanks. Nice Debate.
Debate Round No. 3
8 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 8 records.
Posted by rougeagent21 5 years ago
rougeagent21
You guys flipped sides. person_16 should be NEG.
Posted by wingnut2280 6 years ago
wingnut2280
candice....people usually vote on the debate, not the topic.
Posted by Harlan 6 years ago
Harlan
I was never spanked, I dop not think you would be able to tell that it was that way.
Posted by kels1123 6 years ago
kels1123
Sarah Huff , you are wrong in your statement that you can tell a child who is spanked from a child who is not. There are plenty of well behaved children in this world that are not spanked. As for your comment about Stupid , tree hugging liberals ... I am not a liberal and yet I don't believe a child needs to be spanked to behave.. and I think your comment was inappropriate.
Posted by candice 6 years ago
candice
Not Harlan... I ment to put sarah-huff... sorry... :)
Posted by candice 6 years ago
candice
I hate having to spank my little dude... but if he does something that could harm himself, like runing out into the road, or runing away from me I feel obligated. Time out doesn't exactly work with toddlers. When you have a one year old waking up every morning and smearing poop on his crib... you'll start believing in spanking. P.S. Harlan, I like trees... that has nothing to do with spanking my child... silly conservative...
Posted by Harlan 6 years ago
Harlan
Psysho-therapy...Sick!

Regardless of whether it "hurts" the instance of a parent physically, angrily, hitting thier child, is a gesture that both confuses and traumatizes the child on a deep, near-instinctual level...It is completely unnastural to use this psycho-therapy to repress them in this way.
Posted by kels1123 6 years ago
kels1123
Peron 16 , I disagree that kids need to be spanked or they end up as trouble makers , some kids are never spanked and end up as trouble makers and some are spanked and given the rod and they end up as trouble makers.
17 votes have been placed for this debate. Showing 11 through 17 records.
Vote Placed by sarah-huff 6 years ago
sarah-huff
person_16wingnut2280Tied
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Vote Placed by azrael777 6 years ago
azrael777
person_16wingnut2280Tied
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Vote Placed by griffinisright 6 years ago
griffinisright
person_16wingnut2280Tied
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Vote Placed by BrownEyedAlto932 6 years ago
BrownEyedAlto932
person_16wingnut2280Tied
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Vote Placed by megan91509 6 years ago
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person_16wingnut2280Tied
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Vote Placed by kels1123 6 years ago
kels1123
person_16wingnut2280Tied
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Vote Placed by LoudounConservative 6 years ago
LoudounConservative
person_16wingnut2280Tied
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