Trains should stop being so boring.
Debate Rounds (2)
Recently, a man's body was found at a railway station in Southampton (that is over here in England). Hopping Hampshire Police said the death was being treated as "unexplained", however I think I know how that man died.
In this PC* world of ours, people are afraid to speak out against things that are foreign to a lot of us, such as trains. We all know that the man clearly died of boredom, probably after he saw how slow trains actually are (1, 2, 3 and 4).
My point is that trains should stop all this being boring business. If they weren't so studgy and humdrum, one good man would still be alive to this date!
Fortunately for the whole of mankind, Police did serve one good purpose by sealing off the station so that nobody else could die of boredom from seeing the tortoiselike tedious trains.
Pictured above: Police seal off area
(1) The first video
(2) The second video
(3) The third video
(4) The fourth video
*- Politically correct
Clearly not, as I am typing this right now.
"If they weren't so studgy and humdrum, one good man would still be alive to this date!"
While that is one way to go about the issue, it is certainly not the best or what we should do. The real answer is to make the trains go even slower, have duller colors, and make them all around more boring. This way, trains will take up even less space in a certain amount of time, let's say 100 km^3 as opposed to 1000 km^3. As shown by this proof, the universe is infinite:
P1 There is a universe
P2 There is everything in the universe
C The universe is infinite
Since 100 < 1000 there is
a. A smaller chance of seeing such a boring vehicle
b. An impossibility of seeing said vehicle as 100/infinity=.0 repeating 1, which equals 0.
In fact, 1000/infinity is 0, so there is no issue in the first place. It is a logical impossibility for that man to have seen any train, and therefor was a government conspiracy.
P1) Trains are studgy
P2) There are too many trains
C) We should get rid of trains.
That's another way of proving it.
No. Of trains = infinity (it seems like it at least)
Their studginess = more than infinite (it seems like it any way)
Total studginess = infinity x more than infinity = infinite studginess
We should fix infinity because it is not a real number, so therefore we should fix trains with their boring and slow ways.
SEE? TRAINS ARE EVIL!
This is why we should get rid of them. THEY're a real menace.
Con's argument is for trains rather than against them, so by power if arguing, his argument is way too boring and slow so you shouldn't read his argument. Read mine instead!
Now add to that and you get
1+2+3+...=more than infinity
-1/12=z=1+2+3+...=more than infinity=Their studginess
I have proven that the studginess of a train is negative, and a negative times a positive is a negative. Therefor, trains have a negative amount of total studginess, and my opponent's only argument has been destroyed.
I have shown that Pro's argument really boils down to semantics and questionable debating tactics, a vote for him is a vote for Satan!
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