The Instigator
Strategery
Pro (for)
Tied
0 Points
The Contender
Smooosh
Con (against)
Tied
0 Points

US should bomb Agrabah

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Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 12/6/2016 Category: Funny
Updated: 1 year ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 476 times Debate No: 97729
Debate Rounds (4)
Comments (2)
Votes (0)

 

Strategery

Pro

The United States should bomb the Islamic country of Agrabah.

Rules:
No kritiks
Agrabah must be considered a real country by all parties

Rounds:
1 - acceptance
2 - arguements
3 - rebuttals
4 - rebuttals / conclusion
Smooosh

Con

I accept.
Debate Round No. 1
Strategery

Pro

1) The Sultan is a Tyrannical Dictator

He literally spends his days playing with animal figurines and counting gold dust while the rest of his kingdom starves, and has no regard for improving the welfare of his people. He also appoints evil mad men to be his adivsors and arranges marriages for his daughters.

2) Agrabah is a Police State

Citizens of Agrabah can be improisoned without trial or forcibly have thier hands cut off for minor offences, such as strealing a loah of bread. The sultan's guards also act as a secret police force.

3) Magic is a major threat to National Security

The gene is basically an unregulated WMD and could wreck an entire country if he choose to. Jaffar can also turn himself into a giant snake and manipulate minds with his staff.

4) Agrabah is okay with slavery

Prince Ali offered slaves to the Sultan so he could marry Princess Jasmine. Human slavery is obvisouly against international law and should be punished.
Smooosh

Con

1. Agrabah poses no threat to the United States.

A military action in Agrabah would be a waste of tax dollars. We have on going, unresolved military actions in several other countries currently, an invasion in Agrabah would become to costly for American taxpayers.
Invasion of Agrabah would needlessly create another enemy for us, and the ensuing power struggle after the regime topples could leave the country in danger of extremist groups ( Isis, al queda, Taliban) setting up training camps.

2. Agrabah could make a good trade partner.

Agrabah has a rich cultural heritage, and many resources that could be beneficial for American business, most notably it's magical powers, a recourse the U.S. hasn't tapped into. Trading nuclear power, for in site on how to build our own magical power program, could prove highly beneficial to both our countries. It could create a great ally in a region where there aren't many for us.

3. Agrabah could be a wonderful vacation destination.

Prince Ali has shown interest in progressive reforms for his nation, not to say Agrabah is without problems, but if the U.S. can help to influence more democratic ideals in Agrabah, it could become a wonderful vacation destination, which in turn could expand Agrabanian economy which could create better options for Agrabanian society.

Agrabah would make a better military/business ally than it would just another country for the U.S. military monster machine to needlessly invade for the sake of profit for crony corporations more willing to take government handouts, than being legitimate competitive companies. DON'T BOMB AGRABAH!!!!

I would like to take this time to thank my opponent for letting me argue in this FRIGGIN WEIRD debate, and I wish him luck!!!
Debate Round No. 2
Strategery

Pro

Rebuttals:

"A military action in Agrabah would be a waste of tax dollars."

Its not a waste of tax dollars if it can proved that Agrabah is a threat to national security. Magic of course, defies the laws of physics, and an unregulated walking, talking, singing, magic wielding, carpet-flying, WMD (like the gene) that answers to no government and could literally transform a monkey into an elephant though a wave of his hand, is of course a threat to national security. The gene lamp cannot be allowed to fall into the wrong hands.

"Agrabah could make a good trade partner."

Trading with Agrabah (and a totalitarian government) would ruin America's moral standing in the world. How could we possibly claim then to be a political leader of the free world (and a leader at the United Nations) if we are willing to trade and give aide to countries that denigrates women, devalues democracy, and promotes slavery? The diplomatic consequences are too much then for us to ever consider trading with Agrabah.

"Agrabah could be a wonderful vacation destination."

Agabah would be a terrible vacation spot. Its hot, dry, impoverished, lacks water, is swarming with thieves and prostitutes, is surrounded by desert, has totalitarian laws, a secret police, and as far as we know, only has 13th century tech - which of course means no wifi, air conditioning, or indoor pluming.



Smooosh

Con

*Threat to national security!?!

How many "threats to national security" do we have to rise up to, before we realize it is our own foreign policy that's the real threat? Threat to our freedom!!! If I'm expected to have to shell out more hard earned cash(taxes) and possibly be drafted because all these war vultures think I should drop everything and come a runnin whenever they're scared of some "tyrant with a lamp", how can I get on with my pursuit of happiness? If your pursuit of happiness includes chasing after monkeys on flying carpets, well by all means don't let me get in your way, but when you expect me to have to help pay for it, or even possibly go with you, just leave me out!!!

The sultan hasn't expressed any interest whatsoever in using magic against the U.S. There are no known ties to terrorism, and you haven't shown any specific threat to us from Agrabah, other than they have a genie in a bottle (GENIE, trust your auto correct). You know, it's not out of the realm of reality that Canada could get the bomb, should we invade them, for the sake of being proactive?

*"Trading with Agrabah (and a totalitarian government) would ruin America's moral standing in the world."

Belarus, Turkmenistan, Uzbekistan, Kazakhstan are just a few totalitarian countries the U.S. has trade relations with, and of course the biggest trade partner with the U.S. is China. How do you think THAT effects America's moral standing? Just because another country has a different governing system than ours, shouldn't automatically bar them from engaging in trade with us. Ideally, trade should be governed by individual companies, not the government. Unless a trade partnership could pose a real threat to national security, then our government must disallow that partnership, but you haven't shown any real threat posed to us by Agrabah!

*"Agrabah would be a terrible vacation spot."

Dude, are you kidding me? They have friggin magic!!! They could make your vacation getaway, anything you could ever want it to be, and more. So you don't like hot and dry. Whoosh, and with just one wave of a magic wand, the weather is transformed into a mild and sunny evening, and the forecast calls for calm, rolling thunder showers at night. Oh, I'm sorry sir, did you say, not enough water? Whoosh, then suddenly that distant glimmering mirage is transformed into a beautiful lagoon oasis, with frolicking waves under a purple sunset. I'd love to continue with this argument and tell you more about this sublime, Agrabanian vacation, but Genie just whooshed me up a cigar and an endless bourbon on the rocks, and Black Sabbath is here playing Laguna sunrise, just for me, so I'll have to hit you up later. PEACE:)
Debate Round No. 3
Strategery

Pro

"*Threat to national security!?! How many "threats to national security" do we have to rise up to, before we realize it is our own foreign policy that's the real threat?"

A preventative foreign policy is the only viable security strategy in the age of radical extremists and rouge states armed with WMD. These are the same people who are willing to throw acid in young girls faces for not wearing veils, strap suicide vests onto children, blow themselves up in crowded market places with nail or car bombs, and behead journalists and humanitarian aide workers on national TV. They don’t care about deterrence or containment, have no fear of death, and cannot be counted on to act rationally.

"Threat to our freedom!!!""

Try very serious threat to our own survival. Magic is an existential threat to all of humanity and cannot be allowed to fall into the wrong hands; less somebody uses the lamp and wishes all into extinction.

"If I'm expected to have to shell out more hard earned cash(taxes) and possibly be drafted because all these war vultures think I should drop everything and come a runnin whenever they're scared of some "tyrant with a lamp", how can I get on with my pursuit of happiness?"

That is an incredibly selfish statement of you; and as Donald Trump would say, you ought to be ashamed of yourself for hating on those (and not supporting) the very people who defend you while you sleep. [Insert Thug Life / Snoop Dawg Jam].

"Belarus, Turkmenistan, Uzbekistan, Kazakhstan are just a few totalitarian countries the U.S. has trade relations with, and of course the biggest trade partner with the U.S. is China. How do you think THAT effects America's moral standing?"

None of those countries practice slavery – which is against international law. Nor are they proliferating Magic or WMD.

Giving aide or trade to Agrabah would also increase its value as a security threat, seeing as they would have more cash on hand to fund military expenditures or terrorist activities. We also should not be rewarding countries for bad behavior as it does lower our diplomatic leverage (and moral standing) with countries like Iran and N.Korea.

*"Agrabah would be a terrible vacation spot." Dude, are you kidding me?"

Not kidding. As I’ve stated before: its hot, dry, crowded, impoverished, badly lacks water, is swarming with thieves, gangs, and prostitutes, is surrounded by desert, has totalitarian laws, a secret police, and lacks all sorts of modern tech, including wifi, air conditioning, and indoor pluming.

Agrabah's primary export is Crazy Hakim’s Discount Fertilizer for crying out loud: http://static.tvtropes.org...

Smooosh

Con

Again, my opponent fails to make any convincing argument as to why we should bomb Agrabah, instead choosing only to hurl insulting remarks at me,(ouch) which were chock full of rhetorical, clique, catch phrases. I'm surprised he left out some of the most obvious ones like "freedom isn't free" and " we're gonna make 'murica great again". A couple of chestnuts that would have fit in great with your argument.

*My opponent does not make a convincing argument about the dangers of magic.

Agrabah has supposedly had magical technology for decades, and it hasn't been a threat to us so far, however just because my opponent is suddenly frightened by it, he expects the rest of us to jump!?! He accuses me me of "hating on those (and not supporting) those who defend (me) while (I) sleep". If his idea of "supporting", is to constantly call on our men and women who serve, to go fight for HIM whenever HE'S afraid, perhaps they would rather not have his support.

*My opponent didn't prove that Agrabah would not be a beneficial trade partner.

Sadly, sometimes, our country trades with not so nice countries, but that's how capitalism works. Agrabah may have slavery which is disgusting, but our country trades with SEVERAL countries with slavery. Uzbekistan, China, India, have huge numbers of people living in slavery. Human trafficking is rampant amongst those and other countries, and even a problem in the U.S. I fail to see how bombing Agrabah could solve that. I also don't think trade with any of these countries effects this problem either way, it will continue anyway. The problem of modern slavery must be tackled by all countries of the world, and simply pointing the finger at other countries, while ignoring it at home, solves nothing!!!

*My opponents argument seems only be based on a concept of war for the sake of war. It is a twisted vision of globalization, without thinking of the consequences to the victims of war.

Again, I would like to thank my opponent for allowing me to make my case in this argument, and I congratulate him on making a good argument on his part. Good luck!!!
Debate Round No. 4
2 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 2 records.
Posted by rogueone 1 year ago
rogueone
Smooosh,
In our Nuclear Power Debate we may need to restart because you haven't had a chance to state your case and since you debate second it would seem like kind of a cheap shot since I wouldn't have a chance to respond to it. If you agree please post a comment on one of my debates ASAP since I don't have much time to post an argument.
Posted by Smooosh 1 year ago
Smooosh
I think I would like this one, but could you specify a fictitious threat from this fictitious nation.
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