War of wits
Debate Rounds (5)
This is purely for fun and because I just love witty sayings. Basically all you do is counter my "witty sayings" with some of yours. THE QUOTES DO NOT ACTUALLY HAVE TO BE SAID BY YOU, BUT BY ANYONE. Like by a favorite comedian or author for example.
Let the games begin.
Oh and... May the odds be ever in your favor. <3 :)
GeorgiaAshley forfeited this round.
Here you go, I will try to make up for it! ;)
Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected expected?
Graduation Speech: I would just like to thank Wikipedia and whoever the hell invented copy and paste! :)
Man is the only living being who cuts trees, makes paper, and writes "SAVE TREES" on it.
Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes, that way when you criticize them, you are a mile away and you have their shoes.
Whoever uses the phrase "Easy as taking candy from a baby," has obviously never tried taking candy from a baby.
Being British is about driving a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then traveling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.
If at first you don"t succeed, "then skydiving is probably NOT for you.
Never go to bed angry. Stay awake and plot your revenge...
When you are at the end of your rope"tie a knot and swing :)
Friendships only last when each friend thinks he has a slight superiority over the other.
I may never get out of this world alive but I'll die trying.
When life gives you lemons don"t be afraid to say "No thank you".
If I host a party with style, am I really hostile?
If two ants elope, are they antelopes?
If I keep standing outside, I"m I outstanding?
If I did not take a seat for a whole night, I"m I a one-night-stand...
That'll do for now... :)
If you are talking behind my back, you are in a good position to kiss my a**.
I had a nightmare last night. I dreamed Dolly Parton was my mother and I was a bottle baby.
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.
Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.
My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
When God sneezed, I didn't know what to say.
(I'm a big Henny Youngman fan, if you couldn't tell.)
I'd like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
Don't drink and drive. You might hit a bump and spill your drink.
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first. And, whatever you hit, call it the target.
The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in one ahead...
If evolution is fact, why do mothers only have two hands?
I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives...
My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
Evening news is where they begin with "Good evening", and then proceed to tell you why it isn"t...
Haha, thank you to my opponent. Thank you to my source(s)! Voters please vote PRO! XxOo
A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says 'You've been brought here for drinking.' The drunk says, 'Okay, let's get started.'
Another drunk goes up to a parking meter, puts in a quarter, the dial goes to 60. The drunk says, 'Huh. I lost 100 pounds!'"
-- Henny Youngman
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