The greatest percentage of money spent on medical issues during anyone"s life,in America, is within the last two weeks of that life. Why do we hang on to people that we say we love, like a 98 year old Grandmother, who"s time is here and families fight over agreeing to drastic measures that be done in the ICU that destroy any peace that she may have enjoyed before her end known by all? Doctors feel like failures if someone dies on their watch even at age 100. I have worked with Hospice for over 20 years. I consider myself a midwife for the exit. There is no difference between Life and death other than the way it is understood. Your Thoughts?
Hello, Sure death is natural and must happen but human emotions are vulnerable and easily triggered for a reason. The base fear of every human is death. That fear has given humans survival skills that have helped us become more intelligent and progress for thousands of years. Of course death will be attempted to be prevented or postponed and it will continue to be that way. The significance of life, animal or human, is so great that the more attached you are the more and more you can't let go. Especially if that person was your 100 year old mother or grandmother who made you, took care of you and nurtured you for your life and you may be indebted to that person, not financially but physically, so much that it is hard to leave them and sometimes you may not be able to live without them. Say they have skills and or knowledge that you must know before they die then it will be very hard to accept their death.
I think the spin of linking basic survival of all living things originating from "fear of Death" misses the point. The only cranial nerve that goes directly to the brain without passing through the spinal cord 1st is the olfactory nerve (sense of smell). This is to alert one of danger in the quickest way. To fight or flight you would smell your predator before seeing it, in most cases. This worked well for the cave people in particular! Now back to letting a loved one go that you may feel that you " cannot live without. Let's it was your Grandmother. Yes she is 100 years old. Once her dying process begins embracing it and helping her process through in the most giving, loving, and selfless way is to thank her, let her know that because of her you will be OK and give her permission to leave, when ever she feels ready. Far worse to have a circle of crying people unwilling to let go screaming "we don't know what we are going to do without you. This leaves the dying feeling guilty that it is their time, in most cases!
Since the Con decided to forfeit the last round, I feel compelled to, try and sum up my original intent. I am a Registered Nurse, with years of experience working with death and dying. At any age when it is your time, it is your time. We do not wish it, help it happen, and need to educate, from an early age that death will happen to everyone. Whether one lives a minute or 100 years it is a lifetime. I would love someone to tell me the age at which it is okay. 10,20,30,40,50,60,70,80,90...years. Most people in our culture today truly say never, based on their actions when it happens to someone close. I continue to observe the most awful decisions made, by unaware family members, that think only of themselves and not one minute spent on the quality of life they sentence their supposed "loved one" to. People remain on life support all over America that are brain dead with 100% no chance of ever having any quality of life. Families visit, cry and refuse to sign the papers to just allow nature to take it"s course. Machines make the chest rise and fall which mimics life to most. Death is a normal conversation at our home. Everyone knows what is right. Quality of life trumps quantity always. As long as their is brain function and communication (like Stephen Hawkins) there are exceptions always. Just be ready. Talk with those that you love, know their and they know your wishes when communication is not possible. When it is a loved one's time give then permission and embrace that you got even a minute with them!