Which came first, Chicken, or the Egg?
Debate Rounds (4)
This is a comedy debate. I, the Pro, say the chicken came first. Neg supports the Egg.
My beginning argument is that if the egg came first, Adam and Eve would eat it. NOM NOM NOM.
Chicken? hell no. They wont eat that. All feathery and icky. Plus, they bite.
To accept, you must:
1.Be a chicken. Literally. Not a baby or a sissy, but a live, cocka-doodle-doo chicken. Ive accepted being a chicken, and Now I can fly.You all must join me.
2.You must be female. Guys can't lay eggs.
3.Accept chickens as the dominant species over humans. Nuff said.
Challenge Accepted. (If there are questions about the criteria of my accepting this debate, I will be glad to explain).
I would like to point out that Adam and Eve would have hated the idea of eating an egg. To them, it would have looked like a soft rock. After eating an apple that turned them naked, they wouldn't eat anything that could do the same, (ie another round object). Let's face it, they weren't that smart and were probably extremely scared of eating an egg. However, they would eat a chicken because it is of a completely different look. Besides, they probable just wanted revenge on the snake so they ate the chicken thinking that they must have been friends.
However, I would also like to point out that eggs are cooler than chickens, and most often in today's society, uncool things come from cool things. I.E. facebook apps (extremely uncool) came from facebook (extremely cool).
There is another example of this too, Pro (extremely uncool) came from his mother (as I would know, extremely cool (meaning hot)).
My points stand strong and I dare Pro to try to refute them.
First off, I said females ONLY. Im not a pervert, but men can't lay eggs. Unless your a guy who can lay eggs....
Ok, so when The brorater says they were scared of an egg, these two pictures come to mind.
Scared of an egg? Really? OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH, AN EGG, SO SCARY!!!!!!!!!!!
And, now to for some ASSUMPTION!!!!!!!!!
Now, my opponent states that they would be scared of an egg, but not of an egg. MORE PICTURES!!!!!!!!!!!
So adam and eve would be scared of an egg but not a chicken? BULLSH*T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Chicken came first, and adam avoided it until it made eggs. Then he made an omelette.
Wait, did I just say OMELETTE? ON THAT NOTE: My oponent says that they would eat the chicken. So, if they learned how to cook with fire, then wouldn't they make an OMELETTE with the EGG? EXACTLY.
God made Adam name all the animals, and when God was all "hey, name this thing." Adam:"Oh this white smooth rock" SQUISH. Adam: "....oops......"
I think not.
Now, the BRORATER thinks that uncool things come from cool things. Well, on his facebook note, where did facebook come? MARK ZUCKERBURG. EVEN MORE PICTURES!!!!!!!!
Is this cool?
nope. Nerd. Uncool. So, it could be the egg(cool, i guess?) came from the chicken (how is it uncool, but ok), just like facebook (cool) popped outta Marky (UNCOOL).
And my mom is hot, so no debating there.
BTW, NO AUTOGRAPHS FROM MY MOM.
But, I ask the audience to look at the profile pic of the BRORATER and me. I think we can agree that I am quite atractive, so something cool (me) came outta something cool (my mom). And if we're on the topic of mothers, BRORATERS mommy is pretty "cool(meaning hot)", but it produced HIM? nice.
By the way, BRORATER, nice combover.
I would first like to thank Pro for complimenting my hairstyle, as I have rocked it for my entire life!
=======I must be a female=======
Female: "one who understands the power of ice cream and fast food." (Urban Dictionary)
I understand the power of ice cream and fast food, because I understand that while they both make you hideously fat:
They can also make you extremely happy:
I will expand on this point later.
=======Eggs are f*cking scary=======
I will bring you back to Pros first egg picture:
and his second:
First Picture: THAT SH*T WAS SCARY! I peed myself every time I saw those on Jimmy Neutron because they freaked me out! It represents the eggs as evil overlords, and that's pretty scary, Pro concedes.
Second Picture: Pro links us to a picture of him terrified in the presence of an egg. The expression on his face is one of pure hatred and fear, as we can all clearly see. He concedes again with his own fear of eggs.
If Pro thinks that this:
is more scary than these:
We must have a discrepancy that can only be solved by the voters.
Besides, Pro drops the logic of my argument. I win on this point.
=======Omelettes aren't even good=======
Adam and Eve could not have magically known to break open the egg and cook it, it's just not right or logical. However, taking revenge on the snake, it was easy for them to figure out how to throw a chicken into a fire.
If Mark is not cool for having the Person of the Year title:
I don't know what is.
Point in case.
Compared to Mark, Facebook is not cool. Facebook is just a waste of time and a means to procrastination. However, compared to the applications on it, Facebook is very cool.
=======I have better pictures of Pros mother, however, they are too explicit for DDO=======
I don't need an autograph from your mother, I have plenty, and they aren't signatures.
The next point is subjective, Pro claims he is cool, I claim he is not, completely subjective and left to the voters. Also, on the point of my mother, she is not cool at all, and I am still cooler than she is, I win this point.
I enjoyed reading Pros case, it was clever and witty.
I thank my opponent for his creative argument and his compliments on my witty arguement.
My opponent says he rocks his hairstyle, but ladies and gentleman, Look at my profile pic and LOOK AT MY HAIR. BOOM. It gives me shivers just thinking about it. I rock my hairstyle much more than my opponent.
On my opponents argument about females, he may think he is the only female, but I MAY BE ONE TOO. I understand the power of ice cream and fast food as well. But then again, I have a dick. So, there must be something wrong here.....
My opponent acts like I am really scared by the egg in pic #2. While my acting is very good and realistic, I am merely pretending. I am showing how rediculous it is to believe that one would be scared of an egg.
And on his argument for Jimmy Neutron, I have but one thing to say: AIRPLANES. That is all. Try to beat THAT!
My opponent keeps acting like eggs are scary. Ill bring us all back down to earth with my original 2 pics.
Btw, I can't see your chicken pic, so I guess the eggs are as scary as.... nothing?
But the point is, eggs=cute, chickens=scary is sh*t. nuff said.
My opponent then says that it is easy to throw a chicken in the fire and eat it like that. Well, WHAT ABOUT THE FEATHERS!?!?!?!?!? As stated in my first argument, the feathers are "icky". Ommelets: Yum-Yum. I also don't see how throwing a chicken into the fire is taking revenge on the snake.....
Now, onto Mark Zucky's case. Just because your person of the year, doesn't mean sh*t if your cool or not. Many people in the past, such as presidents, aren't that cool. You may argue that they all were, but George W. Bush and Barack Obama were both people of the year.
(http://en.wikipedia.org...). So if your pro-bush, or pro-obama, you think at least the other one isn't cool. Therefore, you don't have to be cool to be person of the year.
My opponent also said that compared to mark, FB isn't cool, but compared to the apps on FB, FB is cool. So, its cool and not cool?
(). As said by master Yoda, there is no both. It is cool, or not cool.
Onto my opponents case about her and my mom's "Autographs", really? Have we resorted to having sex with eachothers mothers? Nice. lets grow up and talk about chickens and scary sh*t again.
BTW respect the mother, don't say your cooler than her. She gave birth to you, so she can sure as f*ck take it away.
Also, my opponent has not accepted chicken as the dominate species. Please cover how you have. And you can't fly. I can. Look and see.
So, let me get this straight. We've talked about mark zuckerburg, facebook, Jimmy Neutron, My megan fox mom, person of the year, ommelettes, The bible and genesis, egg overlords, what defines a girl, and how i'm able to fly.
.......What the F*CK?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
Whether or not Pro THINKS he rocks his hair style, the shivers he gets is probably because he's so scared. And we all know, with shivers, there are usually goose bumps. Goose bumps show up as a natural fear tactic. Animals raise their hairs, and humans get goose bumps. Not only when we're cold, but scared. Pro was obviously afraid of his own picture.
Well, as much as Pro takes pride in his dick, the argument was that I was a female because I understand the power of ice cream and fast food. Therefore, I am still a female by my definition, and Pro has not proven me wrong. No one cares if he has a dick or not.
The point about him being scared of the egg in the picture is merely subjective. While I say he was truly scared, he can obviously pretend like he was acting. This entire point will be thrown out because he can claim anything, considering he took the picture.
On Jimmy Neutron, I will respond to his argument "AIRPLANES" with "IN THE NIGHT SKY ARE LIKE SHOOTING STARS< I COULD REALLY USE A WISH RIGHT NOW, WISH RIGHT NOW, WISH RIGHT NOW."
Pro tries to link us to some pictures of an Egg and a Chicken, but I don't know about the voters, I could not access them through his links. Fail.
He could not see my chicken picture, and I apologize for that, it was a sweet little chicken that looked as adorable as tweety bird.
As I proved in the last round, Chickens are cute, and eggs make people flip 2 sh*ts.
My point was that the snake could have been friends with the chicken, which is why they would have thrown it into the fire. After the chicken was burnt, they then would have gotten rid of the feathers and everything else they didn't want. They also would not have had a pan to make an omelette.
Pro doesn't seem to understand my Person of the Year point. Mark Zuckerberg is cool because he was person of the year. It doesn't matter if you like the person, they are still cool. I may not like the jock of our school, but they're cool.
And again, Pro understands jack-sh*t of my arguments. If you compare Facebook, to Mark, Mark is cooler. If you compare Facebook to it's Apps, it is cooler. Case - in - point.
YET AGAIN, Pro ASSUMES. We all know what happens when we assume. I did not resort to telling Pro I had sex with his mother, the autograph could have been anything.
The point that my mother can take my life will be thrown out because it is rude and uncalled for.
I was not challenged on the criterion of this debate until now (other than being a female). This is the second to last round of this debate, and because I've been able to debate, has therefore given me the right to all of the criterion.
"To accept, you must:" is what Pro said. I have accepted, therefore, I must meet all the criterion. Besides, if Pro wants to play this game, he has not proven that he is a chicken or has accepted chicken as the dominant species. We can also see that he edited a photo (terribly) to claim he can fly.
Mothers... Zucky... Jimmy N... Flying... geeze. We ARE EPIC!
I rebutle by stating in my profile pic, I am scared. Pure sexiness is often too overwhelming for one to take in all at once. Even after seeing myself in the mirror countless times, I am still shaken by its beauty to this day. So, yes, I am scared of how hot I am.
Well, my opponent says no one cares about my dick, and we'll save that for a different debate. But anyways, just understanding ice cream and fast food doesn't make you female. Do you know how to shop for hours? Do you think it's normal for you to have a BF? Do you crave watching chick flicks, crave fast food, and crave to be as thin as a pencil? I think not. If so, I don't think your debating me, but your own sexuality....
My opponents rebutle against my airplanes argument is near flawless, and I find it hard to rebutle against since I am a huge fan of B.o.B.. But, he forgets about how airplanes will bring about the destruction of the dinosaurs. Since dinosaurs created satan, and satan created the dinosaurs, and since satan and God are enemies, and since religion is an idea, and since the bible was influenced by God, chickens and eggs are all but an idea. YOUR MINDS HAVE BEEN BLOWN. Good luck trying to rebutle that point, BRORATOR.
And I apologize to my opponent and the audience, I have no freakin idea how satan ideas and picture databases turned out to be the pictures. But the point is, we can go back an forth over the opinion of which is cuter or meaner, and it should be up to the voters to decide.
On the snake case, HOW THE F*CK WOULD A CHICKEN AND A SNAKE BE FRIENDS?!?!?!?!? Snakes eat chickens! While they eat eggs as well, it makes no sense that they would be friends. And a rock over a fire works as well as any pan.
The argument on what is cool about Zuckerburg will be thrown out because of the fact that cool is in the eye of the beholder, and that we may all eat sacred bananas from Zimbabwe.
Rude and uncalled for? Really, and when you say you get "autographs" from my momma, how does that not mean sex? Get real.
BTW, that pic is 100% real. Just ask KOOPIN (http://www.debate.org...) about how real it is. I do not have to prove I have accepted chickens as dominant species. Take my word for it. I have.
I thank my opponent for probably the most interesting and funny debate I've had and look forward to debating again.
VOTE FOR PRO!!!!
Pro says he is scared in his profile pic, and goes on to debate an entirely different point about being scared BY his profile pic. Pro does admit to being scared of his profile picture, as I stated before, but for a reason that I wasn't debating. The reason I was debating (I certainly thought it obvious) was that Pro is so hideous, anyone would be afraid.
By my definition, understanding the power of ice cream and fast food is what defines someone as a girl, Pro doesn't provide a single definition than his own assumption of what he thinks a girl is. Therefore I win on this point.
My opponents point on airplanes and chickens and eggs and such will be thrown out because it does not help either of our cases, making it completely irrelevant. (Understand the irony here, anyone?)
Cuteness and apparently coolness are both in the eye of the beholder, so we will leave both points to the voters.
On my point about the chicken and the snake being friends, it was completely theoretical. I proved that it would make MORE sense for them to eat a chicken than it would be for them to eat an egg. This point still stands. I would also like to reiterate the fact that they would not be able to cook an egg. The first time they opened an egg, they'd have absolutely no idea what to do with it. Besides, the egg yolk and whites are disgusting unless cooked, they would stray away from eggs because of this too.
And yes, you can give autographs many different ways. A hand print is an autograph, and foot print, a finger print. Who's to say she didn't give me copies of her finger prints? This is, again, Pro assuming things.
Both Koopin and Pro have fake pictures. This strengthens my point that Pro cannot fly, and that it is just an edited photo. Also, if Pro tells me to "take his word for it" that he accepted the chicken as the dominant species, I can tell the voters to "take my word on it that I can fly." I win on all criteria of this debate.
Thank you Pro for a very serious and educational debate.
I look forward to more debates just like this on.
A vote for Con is a vote for everything that you want out of life. (AKA COOKIES!)
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