The Instigator
ditzmister
Pro (for)
Losing
7 Points
The Contender
Zaradi
Con (against)
Winning
13 Points

Who is better? Chuck Norris, or the Dos Equis Man?

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Post Voting Period
The voting period for this debate has ended.
after 4 votes the winner is...
Zaradi
Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 5/7/2012 Category: Philosophy
Updated: 5 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 1,608 times Debate No: 23450
Debate Rounds (3)
Comments (1)
Votes (4)

 

ditzmister

Pro

*Trolling only*
The Dos Equis Man won the Iditarod with kittens.
He bowls overhand.
If he could cry, his tears are so manly that they consist of pure testosterone and his tears grow beards.
Zaradi

Con

Chuck Norris raped the Dos Equis Man's mom, and is the illegitimate father of the Dos Equis man.[1][2][3]

Therefore, Chuck Norris made the Dos Equis man, and is therefore better.

Your move.
Debate Round No. 1
ditzmister

Pro

The Dos equis man opened a wormhole through time by crossing the streams[1]
He went back in time, dropkicked his wiener into Chuck Norris's mother, thus creating him and a paradox.
[1] the ghostbusters film.
Zaradi

Con

Chuck Norris did not have a mother. Any mother would've been too busy makin sammiches for him (yes, even in the womb Chuck Norris was a bro) to give birth to him.

Besides, Chuck Norris created Ghost Busters. Chuck Norris created everything.

Your move.
Debate Round No. 2
ditzmister

Pro

Chuck Norris only has one testicle, the other one was lost to wolverine in the heat of battle, we now know it to be jupiter. This lack of testicle means that he was incapable of producing a man of such caliber as the Dos Equis man. George Lucas proved this in Star Wars. Also the Dos Equis man is older, more interesting and doesnt drink often, but when he does he only drinks high quality alcoholic beverages. Chuck Norris died at the end of return of the dragon.
Zaradi

Con

Chuck Norris only has 1 testicle

This is false. While he did lose a testicle in the fight with Wolverine, he had 3 to begin with. 3-1=2 so Chuck is perfectly capable of doing anything. This was proven in the recently released biography of Chuck Norris's achievements, also known as The Avengers.

he only drinks high quality alcoholic beverages

HA! If that were true, he would be drinking Chuck Norris's piss.

Oh wait. That IS Dos Equis. My bad.

Clear win for Chuck Norris. If it isn't, Chuck Norris will split you at the molecular level via roundhouse kick.
Debate Round No. 3
1 comment has been posted on this debate.
Posted by imabench 5 years ago
imabench
WHY DID NO ONE ALERT ME ABOUT THIS DEBATE?

nac
4 votes have been placed for this debate. Showing 1 through 4 records.
Vote Placed by Microsuck 5 years ago
Microsuck
ditzmisterZaradiTied
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Total points awarded:70 
Reasons for voting decision: Counter TAA
Vote Placed by TAA 5 years ago
TAA
ditzmisterZaradiTied
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Reasons for voting decision: i dont always drink but when i do IM GAY!!!!
Vote Placed by OberHerr 5 years ago
OberHerr
ditzmisterZaradiTied
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Reasons for voting decision: It's goddang freaking Chuck Norris! I don't even know who Dos Equis Man is!
Vote Placed by 1dustpelt 5 years ago
1dustpelt
ditzmisterZaradiTied
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Total points awarded:03 
Reasons for voting decision: kfc