The Instigator
Darkhan.Shakabayev
Pro (for)
Losing
2 Points
The Contender
Aiko
Con (against)
Winning
8 Points

Working mothers cannot give decent upbringing to their children

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Post Voting Period
The voting period for this debate has ended.
after 3 votes the winner is...
Aiko
Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 3/12/2013 Category: Society
Updated: 4 years ago Status: Post Voting Period
Viewed: 3,754 times Debate No: 31209
Debate Rounds (2)
Comments (0)
Votes (3)

 

Darkhan.Shakabayev

Pro

Hello everyone.
Nowadays, most of people, including working mothers, believe that the most important thing in their life is building a career. In my opinion mothers should stay at home and give to their children decent bringing. If they will not give good upbringing, they will not know which thing in our world is bad and which thing is good. Children start to smoke and drink alcohol, because they mothers work.

Aiko

Con

Hello, thank you for your debate.
First of all I'd like to mention the term "good mother" is not synonymous with stay-at-home mother. If a mother stays home with her kids, but buries her face in a computer all day, she is not spending time with her kids. On the other hand, a working mother may make a point of doing something special with her children in the evenings when she's home. That hour she just spent with her children was more special than the 8 hours another mother spent on the computer or buried in housework.
Secondly, a working mother will often have more patience, having been away from her children all day. While a stay-at-home mom has been with her children all day and may be short on patience because of that. A woman may start feeling overwhelmed with being with her children all day every day, just as someone may tire of the co-workers they see day in and day out. This doesn't mean she loves them any less, just that she needs that time away from her kids to get back in touch with herself and be an individual. Most of mothers say that they can't be a good mother if they don't get out of the house and do something exclusively for themselves.
Thirdly, it does not matter where mother is, if even she is at home, it does not mean that her child cannot drink alcohol and take drugs.Mother cannot control all her child's activities. If she wants to control it, she should go everywhere with her cild.
Debate Round No. 1
Darkhan.Shakabayev

Pro

Hello, Aidana. Thank you for participating.
Unfortunately, I disagree with your arguments. Firstly, you wrote that no matter if mother work, she can take care of her child. But according to Doughty (2001), children whose mothers work are likely to do worse at school, become
unemployed and suffer mental stress. This means that after all, working mother cannot take care of her child like mother who stay at home.
Secondly, you wrote that working mothers have more patience than mothers who stay at home. But also working mothers worry that something may happen with her child. Because of that she may suffer from mental stress. Also you wrote that mother should do something exclusively for themselves to be good mother. But what interfere her to go outside, when their relatives at home? She can go outside from time to time to relax.
Thirdly, you wrote that it doesn't matter if mother work or at home, her children may drink alcohol and smoke cigarets. But can kill him. According to The US Society for Research in Child Development (2010), children at age 3 and 4.5 years and in first grade whom mothers work have behavior problems. This means that after all, employed mother controls her child worse than mother who stay at home.
Finally, I want to add that mother's work has huge impact on child's education. The Institute of Social and Economics Research (2001) stated that if mother of child works, child is twenty percent likely to get an A-level.

References
http://www.dailymail.co.uk...
Aiko

Con

Thank you for your respond, I agree with you in some points.
But when mothers works fathers want to help them with house hold and in this phase children also want help to their moms. In this way, they can learn self awareness and discipline from early age. In addition, the children become co-operative from childhood. It is not possible for non working woman because she is expected to keep everything ready for her husband and children ("Children...", n.d.,para 5)
Secondly, yes I agree with you their work can be stressful but when mothers come back after their job, for whole day they miss their children and can make them happy.When they see their children they become kind and they show for their children how they love them. When mothers who stay at home they do not miss their children and cannot show them those feelings which working mothers can show ("Children...", n.d.,para 7). You mentioned about why mothers should go somewhere when their family at home. Why not? Do you really think that they should stay at home all day and all night? I do not think so, because they need some time for themselves. Even though being a mother is filled with busy days and a constant companionship, many mothers experience feelings of loneliness and isolation. After that it can end with stress and depression (Michelle LaRowe, 2012)
However working mothers can take care of their children, they can give better education to their children. Working mothers in many cases know how to provide their children with high education, they can teach them how to achieve goals and to be high professional specialists. They also motivate children to participate in different activities and then children want to resemble to their parents. ("Children...", n.d.,para 6).
In conclusion, the thing to remember is that any mother can be a good mother, whether she works or stays at home. What does make mother a good mother, of course it is love. With love mother will find ways to do the right thing to her children. All moms sacrifice themselves in order to nurture their children. I hope all moms know what to do for their children and how to grow them up.
Darkhan, thank you very much for this debate. It was very interesting topic.

http://www.yourtango.com...
http://www.parentingnation.in...
Debate Round No. 2
No comments have been posted on this debate.
3 votes have been placed for this debate. Showing 1 through 3 records.
Vote Placed by Daktoria 4 years ago
Daktoria
Darkhan.ShakabayevAikoTied
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Reasons for voting decision: Well conducted on both sides. Just a note. I've never really understood why women defend themselves over this. It's like they want men to be free of childraising responsibilities. I don't agree with grantmac's assessment either. There were generalizations on both sides, but even so, generalizations are not necessarily bad.
Vote Placed by TripleM160 4 years ago
TripleM160
Darkhan.ShakabayevAikoTied
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Total points awarded:24 
Reasons for voting decision: Agreed with Con before and Pro did not change my mind.
Vote Placed by Grantmac18 4 years ago
Grantmac18
Darkhan.ShakabayevAikoTied
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Total points awarded:04 
Reasons for voting decision: Poor debate overall, Pro's bare faced assertions made this a particularly difficult read: "Children start to smoke and drink alcohol, because they mothers work." Con refuted Pro quite easily by exposing the invalid argument attributing parenting skills to stay-at-home mom's, who were branded "good mother's" for no reason other than the act of staying at home. Pro's cited article is concluded with a strong criticism of the results, derived from a research with a larger group of participants. This point was unnoticed by Con, but Pro's overgeneralized statements weakened his/her position terribly.