The Instigator
dairygirl4u2c
Pro (for)
Losing
3 Points
The Contender
monetary_sniper
Con (against)
Winning
37 Points

sex before marraige is wrong

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Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 12/27/2007 Category: Religion
Updated: 9 years ago Status: Voting Period
Viewed: 1,480 times Debate No: 1070
Debate Rounds (3)
Comments (2)
Votes (11)

 

dairygirl4u2c

Pro

honestly, i'm not sure where i stand on this issue. my religous upbringing has messed me up.

i could see saying fornication, even when it's done as responsibly as possible, is inherently bad. the feelings of permanency that one has for another, indicates we're to save ourselves for that one other person. and the guilt associated with fornication, is also an indication that it's wrong.

of course, these are just my feelings, and i could see a rational statement being put otherwise. given both are rational, it'd seem i'd defer to "feelings".

i want others' feelings. i want them to say they honestly do not harbor those feelings i have.
i especially want others who think it's not feelings, but the right answer to be against me, logically, or at least most probably.
monetary_sniper

Con

Honestly, if sex before marriage were deemed wrong by all of society the world would be a better place. That is not, however, the reality. We live in a world where having sex is as common as having tea and biscuits, and both behaviours begin at about the same age.

First we must set up and define what "wrong" is. Wrong in terms of whom or what? If we are to discuss the ethics of sex before marriage then there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. Are you hurting someone? No (well...the first time it will :D) Are you hurting yourself? No. Because it is futile to discuss this in terms of ethics the better question to ask is "is sex before marriage wrong in society's view?" I can assure you that while many will say yes, a good number of these practiced the very action they condemn.

It is a fallacy to argue something based on the fact that it is what has happened and is the norm, but I will do it nonetheless since for this topic it is applicable. Society will accept sex before marriage more and more as it becomes common. Because of this, you could say it is not "wrong" per say.
Debate Round No. 1
dairygirl4u2c

Pro

you say if it was deemed to be wrong, it'd be a better place. doesn't that indicate that you harbor some sort of inherent feeling that it's wrong?
or are you talking more from a practical perspective?

also, i'm sure society persuades people's beliefs. how are you sure that the beliefs people have that it's wrong are simply misguided, and not objectively right? i mean, i know you can't be "objectively" sure, but subjectively, how do you know?

what are your personal feelings towards it?
do you take those practical points about it... that it doesn't physically hurt anyone etc... to mean that you think it's not wrong?
monetary_sniper

Con

I was speaking from a practical perspective. It's impossible, like you said, to speak of this issue on an objective perspective: this isn't math, you can't be sure what is right or wrong.

I spoke about the practical aspects of the issue (mostly physical) to highlight the fact that from a practical standpoint it is not wrong.

From a religious standpoint, it really is subjective upon one's views (and religion for that matter).

The underlying question I'm trying to pose is: what's the judgement? What should we go by to decide right and wrong? I choose to use society as a whole for that medium because it should be representative of people's beliefs. In this paradigm (the societal one), you can be sure that a majority of people find it acceptable. Can we be sure that it is morally right and that society is not corrupted? No. Simply because there is no reference point to guide is as to what "morally right and wrong is."

This is a futile discussion unless we can decide upon what the deciding factor for "right" and "wrong" is.
Debate Round No. 2
dairygirl4u2c

Pro

i suppose the only real question then.

do you think the majority who thinks it's okay honestly believes it, such that they're not lying to themselves?
the majority would probably rationalize stealing or lying from time to time, or whatever crime just for example, but i doubt it makes it okay.

if you think they're lying to themselves, is it more than just guilty that they've been brought up with? is it a feeling of lying to oneself, that say, someone who's never been brought up religously would feel?

are you even capable of answering those questions? wouldn't studies need done?
monetary_sniper

Con

Are people lying to themselves? Some are, some are not. Do people honestly believe that sex before marriage (hereinafter "SBM") is wrong? No. I have met many a proud, conservative, morally sound person who will admit religion is sometimes a shield for a person's true beliefs. In the context of SBM, it holds true that many people really believe it is right while they say otherwise. Why do people have sex? Because it's fun! I can assure you that killing and/or committing crimes might have a certain "rush" but generally they are not committed for just fun. Thus, your alikening of committing crimes and SBM as things people lie to themselves about it rather flawed.

But really, look at it this way. Do YOU really believe SBM is wrong? Sex is a healthy part of any relationship. Yes, it is true that sometimes having SBM is too soon (emotionally that is), but for some couples it is not. Society is distancing itself from the traditional values of yesteryear, it is not decay but evolution.
Debate Round No. 3
2 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 2 records.
Posted by thirdworldpoet 9 years ago
thirdworldpoet
i dont feel guilty 4 having sex b4 marriage... doesnt bother me. i dont think its wrong. but sometimes ppl get carried away. its hard 2 control one's feelings.
Posted by Mangani 9 years ago
Mangani
This question must be answered from the point of view of the asker- who states she feels "guilt" about the issue. This in and of itself is enough to justify her personal opinion that it is wrong.
11 votes have been placed for this debate. Showing 1 through 10 records.
Vote Placed by Tatarize 8 years ago
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Vote Placed by Mangani 8 years ago
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