The Instigator
Pro (for)
The Contender
Con (against)

the Insulting Challenge

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Debate Round Forfeited
SJM has forfeited round #2.
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Voting Style: Open Point System: 7 Point
Started: 7/3/2016 Category: Funny
Updated: 3 months ago Status: Debating Period
Viewed: 356 times Debate No: 93315
Debate Rounds (2)
Comments (5)
Votes (0)




This challenge is about who can insult the other in the most creative way.
1. No swearing. Because that's not creative.
2. No using insults off of the Internet. Because that's not original.
3. You are to make your own insult.
Whoevers insult is more creative wins. Insults should be light and funny.
Round 1-Accept
Round 2-Post your insult.
Debate Round No. 1


Ladies and gentlemen, with no further ado,
Sit back and relax as I argue with poo.
Poo? You might say,
Well why is that? Well it's just a red herring,
To distract you from swearing.
For swearing's against the rule,
And I am no fool,
So I hope you catch the herring
They'll certainly be no rare thing.
Now back to the point, the topic of now,
I am here to tell you that my opponents a cow.
A cow? You might say,
Now that's quite confusing,
But I assure you right now,
My opponent isn't quite human.
My opponent has gas issues as you may already know,
I swear he has constipation because he never has to go.
His farts, oh boy, ever do they smell,
A horrible nose killing putrid that nobody can foretell.
And as everyone knows,
Cows do fart,
You can see the similarities,
It's on his father's part.

As I have said before,
My opponent is poo.
Like father, like son,
Together that's bull do.
Not a very regal birth, to be born,
But not everyone can choose,
A birth that's so foreign.

SJM, what an interesting name,
Stupidity will be the cause of his fame.
As for the meaning, well isn't it clear,
S is for stupid, you can see if you stand near,
Look in his eyes, he's not all there,
They're cloudy and unfocused, he's quite dense to be fair.
The look on his face says it all,
His lack of intelligence will be his fall.
J is for jealous, and the causes are clear,
No girl would ever want to spend time with a half-deer.
Oh, whoops sorry, I meant half-cow,
But that's also another cause for jealousy now,
I'm truly sorry and I do feel bad,
That SJM has a cow for a dad.
M stands for man and to make it spic and span,
All together that's a Stupid Jealous Man,
But wait, I see a mistake or do my eyes deceive,
A bull and a human together, what do they achieve?
A Minotaur of course,
Poor SJM, if you're feeling miserable, your mothers the source.

Now we will talk about my opponents IQ,
A very worrisome topic considering his views.
My opponent wants to dream big,
To rake in the dough,
But his dreams are too high with an IQ so low.
So what is his future? What could it be?
No one'll hire an imbecile who can't count to three.
I guess it's decided,
There's no other way,
He'll be stuck as a garbage man, that's the highest pay.
Though being a garbage man isn't so bad,
My opponent will be wishing for all that he had.
Those good old days when everything was right,
When he got to play video games all through the night.
Maybe that was his problem,
Why he's here right now.
We all know his heritage came from a cow.
And cows aren't too intelligent just so you know,
Maybe the gene of stupidity is why he's so slow.
So IQ and all is less than three,
.02 to be exact I guarantee.

My opponents future has finally been decided,
Now to his features that are somewhat lopsided.
The nose oh boy, what can I say,
Your minds are better left untainted from that if I may.
But if you really do insist, here's what I'll tell,
My opponent looks are a signature from hell.
The look's are from mom and the horns are dads,
God really messed up to making a kid this bad.
But you're not at fault,
Your mother's to blame,
At least it wasn't a donkey who took her last name.

This is the end, adieu to you all,
Best luck to my opponent at being a garbage man next fall.
I hear he's working, down in the slums,
He'll fit in perfectly being a lazy bum.
Till next time ladies and gentlemen, I will see you soon.
Probably after the rising of the next moon.
As to my opponent, I bid you good bye.
Maybe someday you'll be, as witty as I.

This is suppose to be a light and funny insult. Please don't feel offended by it. I like to rhyme as you can see.
This round has not been posted yet.
Debate Round No. 2
5 comments have been posted on this debate. Showing 1 through 5 records.
Posted by SJM 3 months ago
Whom was made to be the pet of a wondering baboon
And I have never been able to imagine such a creature with no purpose
Whose whole life is only suited for the entertainment of a circus
Why didn"t thy prophet inform us of this problem
Maybe it was for punishment, for thy sin so solemn
Times like these is when one questions their morality
Because creatures like these, call for such brutality
Posted by SJM 3 months ago
Look here Everyone! here is the proof
That god is not loving, creating such a mental youth
It is now evident thee was born from an unsuccessful termination
So it is seen that thee"s family didn"t want this ugly creation
It"s a shame to see someone waste space and time
It"s hard to even bear the existence of such an illiterate swine

I feel pity for those who are around this vermon
Who will forever remain a hopeless virgin
No can stand this horrid creature
And whom was even cursed by Christian preachers
Who indeed everyone mentions they viciously dread
Because who would desire to wed this hideous inbred
Intelligence is not capable of reaching that of babbitt
Always squirming about as a worthless maggot

Thou is rubbish and lumpish to deter even desires of molesters
Thou"s life is funny, so funny that it beats all the jokes of the jesters
Thou spends nights mewling to received ridicule
About how thee"s mother is a wanton wench, haggard mule
Whose only profession was engaging as a roguish strumpet
Who was good at blowing men"s instrument as if they were trumpets
Thee is confused and abused like a disconcerted lab rat
Whom is unnoticed and walked over as an entrance"s doormat
All look away from this failure of the human race
As we all know will amount to nothing except as a mangled disgrace

All will celebrate the end of thy"s life
And I would be honoured to put thy"s throat to thy"s knife
I will be revered as the saviour of the earth
By removing one by one those unwanted childbirths
I desire to see in a connection, this creature and a tomb in
Whom when I address, I hesitate even calling a human
But silly me, why even use resources for such a breath wasted
When thee would deserve just respect from being cremated
Thou is no different from a babbling tool
Who is essentially a walking half-faced cesspool
I am confused to why it wants to still continue its scorn
When thy is worth more when thy skin is worn

What demon conceived this
Posted by SJM 3 months ago
Posted by HeavenlyPanda 3 months ago
Maybe I'll post another challenge.
Posted by TheWaywardWriter 3 months ago
Aw man I would've wanted to accept this" Too late now" *sigh*
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