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FREEDO/THETT PRESIDENTIAL PLATFOoOoOoOoOoOoRM

FREEDO
Posts: 21,057
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5/16/2012 12:32:36 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
As you all know, your honorable and highly adored dictator is running for "president", along with his trusted first-man, Thett3! It is a part of a symbolic gesture to further legitimize the empire. Although you WILL vote for us, we would still like to encourage you to do so in the jolly spirit of election.

---The Issues---

On Banning:

Myself and all those in my imperial-presidential-unnecessarily-long-title-campaign-staff strongly disapprove of any such nonsense as banning. Never again (fnord) will such an injustice and retched indecency occur under our watch. Instead, it shall be replaced with continuous flogging.

On Verification:
We do not support the method of verifying people via cell phones!! No longer shall this be! At any time (Anatidaephobia) some rich person possessing 50 phones could verify themselves over and over again, gaining a huge debating advantage! This is class-warfare! Instead, we will replace it with a system of agents that will be sent to people's houses to confirm that they are in-fact one person with one account. And probably grope them.

On Porpoises:
For many years we have been oppressing the brilliant and peaceful porpoise population here on DDO. We have made it complicated for them to make accounts and stay active by making all accessible computers and internet connection on land. After they have jumped through the hoops (pun? what pun?) of accessing the site, we have denied them the right to vote because they are not apart of the accepted "area" (race). On top of all that, just when they think they are safe, going about their peaceful business, possibly raping a person or two with 9-inches of majestic and serine terror, WE HAVE THE NERVE OF COMPLETELY (hello?) IGNORING THEM. I can't even remember the last time I saw someone replying to a porpoise here on DDO. As if they weren't even here. It's frankly disgusting. I know I'm not taking the popular position here. It's not really something most of us want to confront. But a burning passion has arisen (not a boner) inside me to take a stand against this. I am hoping to champion a cultural revolution here to liberate the porpoises (porpoises).

On Cencorship:

Flogging.

On New Forums:

I find the idea that we should add a history forum absolutely absurd and useless. Instead, we will add these additional forums:

KFC

Illuminati

The Greatness of FREEDO

How To Tie Your Shoes

XXX

On The Perks

As I have made clear, upon being elected, there will be weekly threads wherein will be held incredible orgies.

I will not kill you.

FREE ADULT BEVERAGES

On The Evilness of Our Opponents.

As I have already shedded light on in the past, The Anarcho-Fascist-Apathetic Paratheo-Anametamystikhood Of Eris Esoteric Debate-Dot-Orgian Party Partying Party Party Party (TAFAPAOEEDDOPPPPP) is the only party which does not endorse the slaughtering of puppies.

WE ARE PUPPY APPROVED

The other candidates are not because they are evil. And not the good kind. And they are evil.

On The DDO Elites

The other candidates support such grotesque policies including the slaughtering of puppies and the oppression of porpoises because they are all high-ranking members of the DDO Elite, who will stop at nothing to control us and design the site according to their perverted(saucy) order.

But they underestimate the will of The People!!! (and also 3.5 metric tons of explosives (and also ninjas) manufactured by the Porpoise-Puppy-Invisible-Hand Alliance Radical-Liberation Front For the Further Implementation of Totalitarian Freedoanian Imperialism and Complete and Utter Domination and Udder Domination and Excessive Use of "And"s and Also Excessive Use of All Sorts of Absurd Verbiage in Titles of Things Everywhere and Also Places and Things and Stuff and "Stuff" and Also We Are Actually the Evil Ones and We Will Eat Your Soul (PPIHARLUDUDEUAAEUASAVTTEEAPTSSAWAAEOWEYS)...but that's a different story!)

Additional Info:

There are two more very important things to note!

You can donate to the FREEDO/THETT Super-Pac (KFC for a Crispier Future) by repeatedly slamming your head on your key-board.

Lastly, due to complications in bureaucratic paper-work, the way you must cast a vote for our campaign is by voting for Airmax/Innomen come election time. A vote for them is a vote for us. Don't forget to get out their and vote!
GRAND POOBAH OF DDO

fnord
AlwaysMoreThanYou
Posts: 2,900
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5/16/2012 12:57:32 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
I didn't even read this, but FREEDO gave us the search bar the elite were trying to keep for themselves.

VOTE FREEDO!
'When the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all the truth; for he will not speak on his own authority, but whatever he hears he will speak, and he will declare to you the things that are to come.' - John 16:13
imabench
Posts: 21,206
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5/16/2012 1:04:55 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 5/16/2012 12:32:36 AM, FREEDO wrote:

Lastly, due to complications in bureaucratic paper-work, the way you must cast a vote for our campaign is by voting for Airmax/Innomen come election time. A vote for them is a vote for us. Don't forget to get out their and vote!

Loud and Clear
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
bossyburrito
Posts: 14,075
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5/16/2012 2:21:47 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 5/16/2012 12:32:36 AM, FREEDO wrote:
As you all know, your honorable and highly adored dictator is running for "president", along with his trusted first-man, Thett3! It is a part of a symbolic gesture to further legitimize the empire. Although you WILL vote for us, we would still like to encourage you to do so in the jolly spirit of election.

---The Issues---

On Banning:

Myself and all those in my imperial-presidential-unnecessarily-long-title-campaign-staff strongly disapprove of any such nonsense as banning. Never again (fnord) will such an injustice and retched indecency occur under our watch. Instead, it shall be replaced with continuous flogging.

On Verification:
We do not support the method of verifying people via cell phones!! No longer shall this be! At any time (Anatidaephobia) some rich person possessing 50 phones could verify themselves over and over again, gaining a huge debating advantage! This is class-warfare! Instead, we will replace it with a system of agents that will be sent to people's houses to confirm that they are in-fact one person with one account. And probably grope them.

On Porpoises:
For many years we have been oppressing the brilliant and peaceful porpoise population here on DDO. We have made it complicated for them to make accounts and stay active by making all accessible computers and internet connection on land. After they have jumped through the hoops (pun? what pun?) of accessing the site, we have denied them the right to vote because they are not apart of the accepted "area" (race). On top of all that, just when they think they are safe, going about their peaceful business, possibly raping a person or two with 9-inches of majestic and serine terror, WE HAVE THE NERVE OF COMPLETELY (hello?) IGNORING THEM. I can't even remember the last time I saw someone replying to a porpoise here on DDO. As if they weren't even here. It's frankly disgusting. I know I'm not taking the popular position here. It's not really something most of us want to confront. But a burning passion has arisen (not a boner) inside me to take a stand against this. I am hoping to champion a cultural revolution here to liberate the porpoises (porpoises).

On Cencorship:

Flogging.

On New Forums:

I find the idea that we should add a history forum absolutely absurd and useless. Instead, we will add these additional forums:

KFC

Illuminati

The Greatness of FREEDO

How To Tie Your Shoes

XXX

On The Perks

As I have made clear, upon being elected, there will be weekly threads wherein will be held incredible orgies.

I will not kill you.

FREE ADULT BEVERAGES

On The Evilness of Our Opponents.

As I have already shedded light on in the past, The Anarcho-Fascist-Apathetic Paratheo-Anametamystikhood Of Eris Esoteric Debate-Dot-Orgian Party Partying Party Party Party (TAFAPAOEEDDOPPPPP) is the only party which does not endorse the slaughtering of puppies.

WE ARE PUPPY APPROVED

The other candidates are not because they are evil. And not the good kind. And they are evil.

On The DDO Elites

The other candidates support such grotesque policies including the slaughtering of puppies and the oppression of porpoises because they are all high-ranking members of the DDO Elite, who will stop at nothing to control us and design the site according to their perverted(saucy) order.

But they underestimate the will of The People!!! (and also 3.5 metric tons of explosives (and also ninjas) manufactured by the Porpoise-Puppy-Invisible-Hand Alliance Radical-Liberation Front For the Further Implementation of Totalitarian Freedoanian Imperialism and Complete and Utter Domination and Udder Domination and Excessive Use of "And"s and Also Excessive Use of All Sorts of Absurd Verbiage in Titles of Things Everywhere and Also Places and Things and Stuff and "Stuff" and Also We Are Actually the Evil Ones and We Will Eat Your Soul (PPIHARLUDUDEUAAEUASAVTTEEAPTSSAWAAEOWEYS)...but that's a different story!)

Additional Info:

There are two more very important things to note!

You can donate to the FREEDO/THETT Super-Pac (KFC for a Crispier Future) by repeatedly slamming your head on your key-board.

Lastly, due to complications in bureaucratic paper-work, the way you must cast a vote for our campaign is by voting for Airmax/Innomen come election time. A vote for them is a vote for us. Don't forget to get out their and vote!

I didn't know that this had an english version :I
#UnbanTheMadman

"Some will sell their dreams for small desires
Or lose the race to rats
Get caught in ticking traps
And start to dream of somewhere
To relax their restless flight
Somewhere out of a memory of lighted streets on quiet nights..."

~ Rush
tvellalott
Posts: 10,864
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5/16/2012 2:30:59 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
I have a confession.
I, am a porpoise.
"Caitlyn Jenner is an incredibly brave and stunningly beautiful woman."

Muh threads
Using mafia tactics in real-life: http://www.debate.org...
6 years of DDO: http://www.debate.org...
FREEDO
Posts: 21,057
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5/16/2012 2:32:39 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 5/16/2012 2:30:59 AM, tvellalott wrote:
I have a confession.
I, am a porpoise.

You are brave, my friend. Very brave.
GRAND POOBAH OF DDO

fnord
bossyburrito
Posts: 14,075
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5/16/2012 2:40:08 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 5/16/2012 2:32:39 AM, FREEDO wrote:
At 5/16/2012 2:30:59 AM, tvellalott wrote:
I have a confession.
I, am a porpoise.

You are brave, my friend. Very brave.

I am a manatee.
#UnbanTheMadman

"Some will sell their dreams for small desires
Or lose the race to rats
Get caught in ticking traps
And start to dream of somewhere
To relax their restless flight
Somewhere out of a memory of lighted streets on quiet nights..."

~ Rush
FREEDO
Posts: 21,057
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5/16/2012 2:41:21 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 5/16/2012 2:40:08 AM, bossyburrito wrote:
At 5/16/2012 2:32:39 AM, FREEDO wrote:
At 5/16/2012 2:30:59 AM, tvellalott wrote:
I have a confession.
I, am a porpoise.

You are brave, my friend. Very brave.

I am a manatee.

GTFO of here! We don't like your kind!
GRAND POOBAH OF DDO

fnord
bossyburrito
Posts: 14,075
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5/16/2012 2:46:18 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 5/16/2012 2:41:21 AM, FREEDO wrote:
At 5/16/2012 2:40:08 AM, bossyburrito wrote:
At 5/16/2012 2:32:39 AM, FREEDO wrote:
At 5/16/2012 2:30:59 AM, tvellalott wrote:
I have a confession.
I, am a porpoise.

You are brave, my friend. Very brave.

I am a manatee.

GTFO of here! We don't like your kind!

That's it. I'm voting for http://www.debate.org... . He will unite EVERY sea creature.
#UnbanTheMadman

"Some will sell their dreams for small desires
Or lose the race to rats
Get caught in ticking traps
And start to dream of somewhere
To relax their restless flight
Somewhere out of a memory of lighted streets on quiet nights..."

~ Rush
tvellalott
Posts: 10,864
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5/16/2012 2:46:47 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
I wonder how many people actually read the platform... There is some nuanced hilarity in there, like the the explosives and ninjas, the end where you admit you're actually the evil ones and the idea that people should vote for Airmax instead of me.

LOL. You crack me up FREEDO.
"Caitlyn Jenner is an incredibly brave and stunningly beautiful woman."

Muh threads
Using mafia tactics in real-life: http://www.debate.org...
6 years of DDO: http://www.debate.org...
OberHerr
Posts: 13,062
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5/16/2012 7:11:12 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 5/16/2012 12:57:32 AM, AlwaysMoreThanYou wrote:
I didn't even read this, but FREEDO gave us the search bar the elite were trying to keep for themselves.

VOTE FREEDO!

*drags AMTY away*
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-OBERHERR'S SIGNATURE-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-

Official Enforcer for the DDO Elite(if they existed).

"Cases are anti-town." - FourTrouble

-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
OberHerr
Posts: 13,062
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5/16/2012 7:13:04 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
Hey, you guys better not have laughed while reading this.

This is a serious matter.
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-OBERHERR'S SIGNATURE-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-

Official Enforcer for the DDO Elite(if they existed).

"Cases are anti-town." - FourTrouble

-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
Oryus
Posts: 8,280
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5/16/2012 8:44:14 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
lol this is awesome. I love it.
: : :Tulle: The fool, I purposely don't engage with you because you don't have proper command of the English language.
: :
: : The Fool: It's my English writing. Either way It's okay have a larger vocabulary then you, and a better grasp of language, and you're a woman.
:
: I'm just going to leave this precious struggle nugget right here.
Chrysippus
Posts: 2,173
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5/16/2012 11:27:42 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 5/16/2012 12:32:36 AM, FREEDO wrote:
As you all know, your honorable and highly adored dictator is running for "president", along with his trusted first-man, Thett3! It is a part of a symbolic gesture to further legitimize the empire. Although you WILL vote for us, we would still like to encourage you to do so in the jolly spirit of election.

---The Issues---

On Banning:

Myself and all those in my imperial-presidential-unnecessarily-long-title-campaign-staff strongly disapprove of any such nonsense as banning. Never again (fnord) will such an injustice and retched indecency occur under our watch. Instead, it shall be replaced with continuous flogging.

On Verification:
We do not support the method of verifying people via cell phones!! No longer shall this be! At any time (Anatidaephobia) some rich person possessing 50 phones could verify themselves over and over again, gaining a huge debating advantage! This is class-warfare! Instead, we will replace it with a system of agents that will be sent to people's houses to confirm that they are in-fact one person with one account. And probably grope them.

On Porpoises:
For many years we have been oppressing the brilliant and peaceful porpoise population here on DDO. We have made it complicated for them to make accounts and stay active by making all accessible computers and internet connection on land. After they have jumped through the hoops (pun? what pun?) of accessing the site, we have denied them the right to vote because they are not apart of the accepted "area" (race). On top of all that, just when they think they are safe, going about their peaceful business, possibly raping a person or two with 9-inches of majestic and serine terror, WE HAVE THE NERVE OF COMPLETELY (hello?) IGNORING THEM. I can't even remember the last time I saw someone replying to a porpoise here on DDO. As if they weren't even here. It's frankly disgusting. I know I'm not taking the popular position here. It's not really something most of us want to confront. But a burning passion has arisen (not a boner) inside me to take a stand against this. I am hoping to champion a cultural revolution here to liberate the porpoises (porpoises).

On Cencorship:

Flogging.

On New Forums:

I find the idea that we should add a history forum absolutely absurd and useless. Instead, we will add these additional forums:

KFC

Illuminati

The Greatness of FREEDO

How To Tie Your Shoes

XXX

On The Perks

As I have made clear, upon being elected, there will be weekly threads wherein will be held incredible orgies.

I will not kill you.

FREE ADULT BEVERAGES

On The Evilness of Our Opponents.

As I have already shedded light on in the past, The Anarcho-Fascist-Apathetic Paratheo-Anametamystikhood Of Eris Esoteric Debate-Dot-Orgian Party Partying Party Party Party (TAFAPAOEEDDOPPPPP) is the only party which does not endorse the slaughtering of puppies.

WE ARE PUPPY APPROVED

The other candidates are not because they are evil. And not the good kind. And they are evil.

On The DDO Elites

The other candidates support such grotesque policies including the slaughtering of puppies and the oppression of porpoises because they are all high-ranking members of the DDO Elite, who will stop at nothing to control us and design the site according to their perverted(saucy) order.

But they underestimate the will of The People!!! (and also 3.5 metric tons of explosives (and also ninjas) manufactured by the Porpoise-Puppy-Invisible-Hand Alliance Radical-Liberation Front For the Further Implementation of Totalitarian Freedoanian Imperialism and Complete and Utter Domination and Udder Domination and Excessive Use of "And"s and Also Excessive Use of All Sorts of Absurd Verbiage in Titles of Things Everywhere and Also Places and Things and Stuff and "Stuff" and Also We Are Actually the Evil Ones and We Will Eat Your Soul (PPIHARLUDUDEUAAEUASAVTTEEAPTSSAWAAEOWEYS)...but that's a different story!)

Additional Info:

There are two more very important things to note!

You can donate to the FREEDO/THETT Super-Pac (KFC for a Crispier Future) by repeatedly slamming your head on your key-board.

Lastly, due to complications in bureaucratic paper-work, the way you must cast a vote for our campaign is by voting for Airmax/Innomen come election time. A vote for them is a vote for us. Don't forget to get out their and vote!

I totally just your entire post.
Cavete mea inexorabilis legiones mimus!
FREEDO
Posts: 21,057
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5/16/2012 3:00:08 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 5/16/2012 7:13:04 AM, OberHerr wrote:
Hey, you guys better not have laughed while reading this.

This is a serious matter.

I'm glad someone isn't so immature!!
GRAND POOBAH OF DDO

fnord
Chrysippus
Posts: 2,173
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5/16/2012 3:37:08 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
It's good to see someone taking the responsibilities of this office seriously. The other candidates seem to be porpoise-less, frankly.

A vote for Freedo is a vote for indefinite floggings and groping. If there will be cake, I'm in.
Cavete mea inexorabilis legiones mimus!
Chrysippus
Posts: 2,173
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5/16/2012 4:43:40 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 5/16/2012 12:32:36 AM, FREEDO wrote:
There will be floggings and then you will be cake.

Yes, you did.
Cavete mea inexorabilis legiones mimus!
airmax1227
Posts: 13,224
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5/16/2012 5:46:50 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 5/16/2012 3:51:43 PM, FREEDO wrote:
Oh, and did I mention there will be cake?!

Just. can't. Help. myself.

The cake is a lie!!!

ahh that feels better.
Debate.org Moderator
FREEDO
Posts: 21,057
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5/17/2012 1:56:28 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 5/16/2012 5:46:50 PM, airmax1227 wrote:
At 5/16/2012 3:51:43 PM, FREEDO wrote:
Oh, and did I mention there will be cake?!

Just. can't. Help. myself.

The cake is a lie!!!


ahh that feels better.

Sssssshhhhhhhh. Don't telllllll themmmm
That's the ironyyyyyy.
GRAND POOBAH OF DDO

fnord
vmpire321
Posts: 4,731
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5/17/2012 5:14:30 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 5/16/2012 7:13:04 AM, OberHerr wrote:
Hey, you guys better not have laughed while reading this.

This is a serious matter.

^This.

Seriously guys...