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DDO House of Cards (Episode 1)

daytonanerd
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4/26/2014 12:09:03 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
Episode 1, Part 1
Written by: Imabench
Italics means he is monologing to the camera, normal means its just natural conversation

[Washington DC, Election Night]

My name is SeventhProfessor, and right about now im one of the luckiest people alive. See that guy over there? Thats president elect Airmax. He just became President by a wide vote and he wouldnt have been able to do so without my support. Do I think Airmax would be a good president? Hell no, hes too centrist for my taste. He thinks Marijuana shouldnt be legalized just yet, I say legalize it. He only hesitantly supports Gay Marriage, I say let em marry. He is against late term abortion, I couldnt be more for it. The power to create and destroy life itself is the greatest power you could ever have, and around Washington DC, its all. about. power.

Why support a man I have so little in common with to become president? Well Airmax over there promised me a nice little seat in his cabinet if elected. The position is called the 'Secretary of State', you may have heard of it.... Ive been a 4 term Senator of Florida, a Governor, and im currently the Senate Majority Whip, which means that for the past 30 years now ive been surrounded by dipsh** republicans and spineless democrats, and its been my job to try to get them to play nicely. It sucked. But now that I bid on the right horse, I get to leave all of that behind, head to greener pastures, and leave my mark on history.

Airmax may have been the one elected President, but tonight im the one who feels like a king ;)


=======================================================================

[2 weeks later, Capitol Hill]

I walked into the office of Airmax's chief of staff, YYW. He was a harda** who is merciless towards his enemies, but otherwise a good guy for Airmax to appoint to keep the rest of the chickens in his circle of advisors in line.

"Hey YYW, I brought you a little present"
"Christmas isnt until next week" - YYW
"This is Congress and our party just took the Presidency, every day is Christmas as far as im concerned"
"What do you got" - YYW
"I went ahead and drafted up a foreign policy for Airmax's administration. Its basically a rip-off of Kissinger's policy, mixed in with some of what Airmax said on the campaign trail, I threw in a few my ideas of my own - "

"Seventh slow down there" - YYW
"Its just a draft relax, im still working on a name for it though, im leaning towards 'trickle down diplomacy' just because it flows so well"
"Seventh there's something I need to tell ya" - YYW
"What?"

"Airmax appointed someone else to Secretary of State......" - YYW
......
......
......
"What the hell do you mean he picked someone else???"
"There was an issue that came up that required a tough decision to be made-" - YYW
"I was the one who was instrumental to getting elected! I was the one who handed him the State of Florida on a silver platter along with half of the rest of the South!"
"I know" - YYW
"He literally promised me the position if I delivered and I DID"
"Lower your voice" - YYW
"Where is he, where is Airmax?"
"Hes busy right now" - YYW
"God f*cking dammit YYW tell me where he is so that I can hear it from his mouth why he decided to f*ck me out of this job after all I did from him"
"He's just finishing up a meeting right now, if you wait about 10 minutes you ca-"

I was already through the door before he could finish talking.

I barged in and Airmax was sitting with two other people: Senator elect ClassicRobert, and Airmax's VP Thett3

They all took one look at my face and they realized that the I had found out.

"Hi Seventh, I was just finishing a meeting with Thett3 and Cla-"
"Good for you, can I talk to you about something real quick? Something relating to f*cking me out of a promised position in your cabinet after I did everything you wanted me to do?"
"I should probably go " - ClassicRobert

He shuffled his way out the door while Thett3 and Airmax exchanged worried glances.

I only barely managed to be able to hold back until after the door shut.

"What the f*ck?" I always had a classy way of starting conversations
"I know youre mad, but hear me out" - Airmax
"Mad doesnt even BEGIN to f*cking express where Im at right now"
"Watch your mouth" - Thett3
"Beat it Thett, you got to keep the job YOU were promised, or did Airmax decide to throw you out to?"
"Seventh, tone it down, you need to know your place here" - Airmax

"I know my place here. Im the guy who almost single handedly got both of you elected even though I didnt give a particular sh** about it. Im the guy who handed you half the states in the South in your huge victory. And IM the guy who was promised a seat in your f*cking cabinet as the Secretary of f*cking State if I pulled through for your campaign, WHICH I DID"

"A problem arose and we had to break that promise" - Airmax
"What in the HELL could have happened that made you retract your promise that you ensured would be implemented not even 5 days ago???" - Me
"Subutai declined to be the new Senate majority leader in your place" - Thett3
"The hell are you talking about?"

Subutai was a 2 term Senator also out of Florida, he was basically my side-kick for the last decade in the Senate and we both kicked some a** together.

"We offered the position of Senate Majority Leader to him but he turned it down, he wants to stay the Senate Majority Whip" - Thett3
"Well how the f*** does that affect me and the decision to f*ck me over?"
"We need someone in charge of the Senate to be able to get our legislation through that can also appeal to the GOP." - Airmax

"Then pick someone who would lick your balls and appoint them to the position" - Me
"None of the other options have half of the experience or skill that you have when it comes to getting bipartisian support for legislation" - Airmax

"Who'd you appoint to the Secretary of State?"
Neither answered
"Who'd you appoint to the position MEANT FOR ME???"
"We went with Nightofthelivingcats" - Airmax
"........... Ok Nightcats isnt the worst pick I suppose" - Me

[Nightcats couldnt find Germany on a f*cking map OF GERMANY]

"We know this isnt exactly a show of good faith to you but Im relying on you to be able to unite Congress and pass the legislation I campaigned on in this election. Can we still trust you to do that?" - Airmax

I thought about if I could do that. If punching a president in the face was legal I wouldve done so the minute I walked into this office, but now I had to pick a side. If I told him to go f*ck himself and promised to gridlock Congress for the rest of my term, it would be a problem since im up for re-election in 2 years and id have to start from scratch all over again to move up into the President's Cabinet.

"I will, but I want something in exchange" - Was all I could think of saying
"You'll be first in line for any Cabinet position that opens up" - Airmax
"Thats basically the same line of sh** you said to me when you first begged for my support, I want something else"
"What?" - Thett3
"Legislation. If I put through the legislation you want, then you both need to give unconditional support to something that I want to pass"

"We cant just give you something like that and you know it" - Airmax
"Its either that or I dont pump as much enthusiasm into your precious little platform you campaigned on as I used to and then watch it wither and die in Congress"

"What you are doing is borderline treason, you know" - Thett3

I chuckled at that.

"Borderline treason, or as its known around here: Politics....."
=============================
#FeeltheFreezerBern
daytonanerd
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4/26/2014 12:12:57 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
Episode 1, Part 2
Written by: Imabench

"I cant give you a free pass to any legislation you want, its just not gonna happen" - Airmax
"Why not, dont you trust me? You trusted me enough to promise me the f*cking Secretary of State position remember?" - Seventh
"Yeah, I did, but im not trusting you on th-" - Airmax
"When did you ultimately make the choice to stab me in the back and leave me out to dry? More importantly, WHY?" - Seventh
"We changed our mind when Innomen decided to step down from being the Senate Majority leader" - Thett3
"That left an openi-" - Airmax
"The f*ck do you mean by WE? YOU had a say in this???" - Seventh
"If you interrupt me one more f*cking time I"ll throw you out of my damn office" - Airmax
"Did Thett have a say in this?" - Seventh
"""..It was actually my idea in the first place." - Thett3

Now I do not have the power to shoot lasers out of my eyeballs, but I sure as f*ck tried to when Thett told me that. I could tell he was scared sh**less by what my face looked like at that moment, and it would probably show up in a few of his nightmares as well.

"When Innomen decided to step down as the majority leader, it left open a spot that we needed to have a loyal Democrat occupying in order for the legislation I want to push to become law".. Thett3 gave me the idea to not have you as Secretary of State and instead see if the party would be okay with nominating you to be the new Senate Majority Leader" - Airmax
His words hung in the air for a bit. Rather than appoint me to Secretary of State, Airmax had instead intended for me to upgrade from Senate Majority Whip to Senate Majority Leader so that he could have a close ally in Congress to pass his prized legislation.
"And why the f*ck would I want to be Senate Majority Leader? That"s the equivalent of being a substitute teacher in a pre-school classroom where you have to make sure people don"t pull on each others hair or sh** themselves!" - Seventh
"The game has changed, this is the best I can do, are you in or out?" - Aimax
"The game didn"t f*cking change, you just got dealt sh*ttier cards" - Seventh
"Are you okay with being the Senate Majority Leader, yes or no?" - Airmax

Senate Majority Leader, though not as great as Secretary of State, is still a position of power, more than being a simple Senator or a Governor. Still not as good as Secretary of State.

"Fine, ill do it" - Seventh
"Can we count you as an ally?" - Airmax "
If you don"t f*ck me over again then ill do whatever you want, how"s that?" - Seventh
"That will work" - Thett3

I stormed out of the office and whipped out my cellphone. I scrolled through all my contacts looking for my notoriously bastard but undeniably loyal and useful chief of staff.

"Yay, call me when you get the chance, the sh** has hit the fan and we got work to do" - Seventh
I almost made it to my car when Yay called me back
"Why the f*ck didn"t Airmax give you the Secretary of State gig?" - Yay
"How the f*ck did you find out so fast?" - Seventh
"You said the sh** has hit the fan, it was pretty easy to figure out what you meant, what the f*ck happened?" - Yay
"Apparently Innomen is stepping down as Senate majority Leader, and Airmax wants me to that position to safeguard his precious legislation he wants passed" - Thett3
"But the whole f*cking goal was to upgrade out of Congress and into the Presidential Cabinet! Upgrade to power, upgrade to HISTORY!" - Yay
"Well history is gonna have to wait a little longer" - Seventh
"So whats the plan?" - Yay
"As much as I want to gridlock Congress and shove the President"s legislation down the darkest pit of hell, I have to watch out for my own a** now" - Seventh
"Yeah, now we gotta worry about re-election, we gotta worry about the new players who came into Congress, potential campaign doners, even your constituents." - Yay
"For the record I was always pretending to care about those things" - Seventh
"Yeah but now that you aren"t upgrading to a better position where this sh** didn"t matter, now we do gotta worry about it." - Yay
"Hence my problem" - Seventh
"So whats the plan?" - Yay
"You want the long version or the short one?" - Seventh
"You know ive always been a whore for details Seventh, that"s why im so useful" - Yay

"Do some research on all the new guys who came into Congress, who is eyeing Senate elections in 2 years, and re-establish connections with all my old allies in Congress since im gonna need them. The grand plan right now is to discretely gridlock anything and everything the President wants to have done in a way that makes it look like it was out of my control. That"s why im also going to need to find someone within the media to bend to my will so that I can slander or cover anyone who I need covered" - Seventh

"Media? We"ve never had to rely on someone in the media before." - Yay
"We"ve never undertook a discrete war like the one im about to launch either, if im gonna pull this off I need every available means to do so, and nothing freaks people the f*ck out in Congress more than bad press, and nothing pleases those same dipsh*ts more than unexpected good press." - Seventh
"Have anyone in mind? I know a dude over in the Washington post who is up sh*ts creek right now who may work perfectly" - Yay
"We"re gonna need more than one person, and the Washington Post is too centrist to really push papers. We need someone in crazy biased organizations if we"re really gonna make a storm." - Seventh
"You mean like Heritage Foundation level bias or Fox News level bias?" - Yay
"Fox News level" - Seventh
"F*ck, youre really gonna go after some b*tches aren"t ya?" - Yay
"Find me someone to use as a megaphone on the far left and far right along with run downs of everyone in Congress I should keep an eye on, including the ones I already think I know." - Seventh
"Consider it done" - Yay said as he hung up the phone.

I"m gonna shove a cork so far up Congress"s a** that they"ll spend the rest of their life with their head up their a** trying to find it
#FeeltheFreezerBern
daytonanerd
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4/26/2014 12:17:26 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
Now, I need to make clear a few things, just so it is understood what is going to be happening.

DDO House of Cards, for those who don't know, was the final project that Imabench worked on before he left DDO. However, he only made it through the pilot episode.

Now, since Zaradi is making his own story, and Donald is busy, I am the last of the three original writer associates left. Ima gave the writers the right to continue the series, so, in his memory, I shall write the rest of the series.

The signups for this story occurred actually a while ago. I don't plan on reopening it in the near future. It is possible that eventually, they may be reopened for others to join.

I will release these things every Saturday, for your enjoyment.

Thank you, for reading.
#FeeltheFreezerBern
SeventhProfessor
Posts: 5,085
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4/26/2014 12:21:59 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 4/26/2014 12:10:02 PM, 9spaceking wrote:
why is imabench obsessed with 7th prof.?

I was the first on the sign ups he could be sure wouldn't leave the site.
#UnbanTheMadman

#StandWithBossy

#BetOnThett

"bossy r u like 85 years old and have lost ur mind"
~mysteriouscrystals

"I've honestly never seen seventh post anything that wasn't completely idiotic in a trying-to-be-funny way."
~F-16

https://docs.google.com...
daytonanerd
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4/26/2014 1:13:35 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
Also, I will add that I will try to write episodes in the style of Imabench, considering that this really was his child, so it should be as true as possible to the way that he intended it to be.
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9spaceking
Posts: 4,213
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4/26/2014 1:44:42 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 4/26/2014 1:13:35 PM, daytonanerd wrote:
Also, I will add that I will try to write episodes in the style of Imabench, considering that this really was his child, so it should be as true as possible to the way that he intended it to be.

So he intended the episodes to be mostly dialogue? I mean, yes, certainly, the Godfather, one of the best films of all time, depends mainly on dialogue for the movement of the plot, but you've got to have something in there. It's hard to tell if there's a problem and what the problem is in the way you're writing it.
Also, it is very hard to tell what is going on. Is 7th trying to overthrow Airmax? Is he incompetent in his field of job?
Or are you trying to create a sense of confusion, a secret cool plot to be slowly revealed bit by bit?
If so, great job. Needs a less swearing protagonist tho. Can't have him smart-mouthing when he's kickin' bass!
Equestrian election
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daytonanerd
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4/26/2014 1:49:22 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 4/26/2014 1:44:42 PM, 9spaceking wrote:
At 4/26/2014 1:13:35 PM, daytonanerd wrote:
Also, I will add that I will try to write episodes in the style of Imabench, considering that this really was his child, so it should be as true as possible to the way that he intended it to be.

So he intended the episodes to be mostly dialogue? I mean, yes, certainly, the Godfather, one of the best films of all time, depends mainly on dialogue for the movement of the plot, but you've got to have something in there. It's hard to tell if there's a problem and what the problem is in the way you're writing it.
Also, it is very hard to tell what is going on. Is 7th trying to overthrow Airmax? Is he incompetent in his field of job?
Or are you trying to create a sense of confusion, a secret cool plot to be slowly revealed bit by bit?
If so, great job. Needs a less swearing protagonist tho. Can't have him smart-mouthing when he's kickin' bass!

You'll see where this character is going in future episodes. I'm not going to reveal ANYTHING that spoils anything in the future

I will answer, however, clarification questions to clear up confusion.
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daytonanerd
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4/26/2014 1:51:26 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 4/26/2014 1:30:09 PM, YYW wrote:
This has got to be among the best DDO fanfics I've seen yet.

I just hope that the rest of the episodes that I write live up to this pilot.

I did send Ima a draft I have of the 2nd episode via Facebook, and he said that he liked it.
#FeeltheFreezerBern
YYW
Posts: 36,252
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4/26/2014 8:06:23 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 4/26/2014 1:51:26 PM, daytonanerd wrote:
At 4/26/2014 1:30:09 PM, YYW wrote:
This has got to be among the best DDO fanfics I've seen yet.

I just hope that the rest of the episodes that I write live up to this pilot.

I just wish Imabench would get his @$$ back to DDO and finish writing it. Daytona, you're a fantastic member and I'm sure you'd write this well... but it's really disappointing to see Bench bail on this.

I did send Ima a draft I have of the 2nd episode via Facebook, and he said that he liked it.

Dude, I'm sure it's fantastic -but I also wish that Bench would return to finish this.
Tsar of DDO
daytonanerd
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4/26/2014 8:28:05 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 4/26/2014 8:06:23 PM, YYW wrote:
At 4/26/2014 1:51:26 PM, daytonanerd wrote:
At 4/26/2014 1:30:09 PM, YYW wrote:
This has got to be among the best DDO fanfics I've seen yet.

I just hope that the rest of the episodes that I write live up to this pilot.

I just wish Imabench would get his @$$ back to DDO and finish writing it. Daytona, you're a fantastic member and I'm sure you'd write this well... but it's really disappointing to see Bench bail on this.

I did send Ima a draft I have of the 2nd episode via Facebook, and he said that he liked it.

Dude, I'm sure it's fantastic -but I also wish that Bench would return to finish this.

Well, he won't come back unless the policy is repealed. I've talked to him about it. So it seems that the series is stuck with me.
#FeeltheFreezerBern
YYW
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4/26/2014 8:30:23 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 4/26/2014 8:28:05 PM, daytonanerd wrote:
At 4/26/2014 8:06:23 PM, YYW wrote:
At 4/26/2014 1:51:26 PM, daytonanerd wrote:
At 4/26/2014 1:30:09 PM, YYW wrote:
This has got to be among the best DDO fanfics I've seen yet.

I just hope that the rest of the episodes that I write live up to this pilot.

I just wish Imabench would get his @$$ back to DDO and finish writing it. Daytona, you're a fantastic member and I'm sure you'd write this well... but it's really disappointing to see Bench bail on this.

I did send Ima a draft I have of the 2nd episode via Facebook, and he said that he liked it.

Dude, I'm sure it's fantastic -but I also wish that Bench would return to finish this.

Well, he won't come back unless the policy is repealed.

That's what he said in his farewell address...

I've talked to him about it. So it seems that the series is stuck with me.

I'd like for him to talk to me about it... and have a realistic discussion of what's actually happened since the policy's been implemented, and even more have a discussion about what's not happened. That's not the kind of conversation I want to have in the open forums, though, for practical reasons.
Tsar of DDO
daytonanerd
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4/26/2014 8:31:50 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 4/26/2014 8:30:23 PM, YYW wrote:
At 4/26/2014 8:28:05 PM, daytonanerd wrote:
At 4/26/2014 8:06:23 PM, YYW wrote:
At 4/26/2014 1:51:26 PM, daytonanerd wrote:
At 4/26/2014 1:30:09 PM, YYW wrote:
This has got to be among the best DDO fanfics I've seen yet.

I just hope that the rest of the episodes that I write live up to this pilot.

I just wish Imabench would get his @$$ back to DDO and finish writing it. Daytona, you're a fantastic member and I'm sure you'd write this well... but it's really disappointing to see Bench bail on this.

I did send Ima a draft I have of the 2nd episode via Facebook, and he said that he liked it.

Dude, I'm sure it's fantastic -but I also wish that Bench would return to finish this.

Well, he won't come back unless the policy is repealed.

That's what he said in his farewell address...

I've talked to him about it. So it seems that the series is stuck with me.

I'd like for him to talk to me about it... and have a realistic discussion of what's actually happened since the policy's been implemented, and even more have a discussion about what's not happened. That's not the kind of conversation I want to have in the open forums, though, for practical reasons.

You can find him on Facebook.
#FeeltheFreezerBern
YYW
Posts: 36,252
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4/26/2014 8:35:45 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 4/26/2014 8:31:50 PM, daytonanerd wrote:
At 4/26/2014 8:30:23 PM, YYW wrote:
At 4/26/2014 8:28:05 PM, daytonanerd wrote:
At 4/26/2014 8:06:23 PM, YYW wrote:
At 4/26/2014 1:51:26 PM, daytonanerd wrote:
At 4/26/2014 1:30:09 PM, YYW wrote:
This has got to be among the best DDO fanfics I've seen yet.

I just hope that the rest of the episodes that I write live up to this pilot.

I just wish Imabench would get his @$$ back to DDO and finish writing it. Daytona, you're a fantastic member and I'm sure you'd write this well... but it's really disappointing to see Bench bail on this.

I did send Ima a draft I have of the 2nd episode via Facebook, and he said that he liked it.

Dude, I'm sure it's fantastic -but I also wish that Bench would return to finish this.

Well, he won't come back unless the policy is repealed.

That's what he said in his farewell address...

I've talked to him about it. So it seems that the series is stuck with me.

I'd like for him to talk to me about it... and have a realistic discussion of what's actually happened since the policy's been implemented, and even more have a discussion about what's not happened. That's not the kind of conversation I want to have in the open forums, though, for practical reasons.

You can find him on Facebook.

I'd like to find him logged on to DDO.
Tsar of DDO
daytonanerd
Posts: 6,769
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4/26/2014 8:38:34 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 4/26/2014 8:35:45 PM, YYW wrote:
At 4/26/2014 8:31:50 PM, daytonanerd wrote:
At 4/26/2014 8:30:23 PM, YYW wrote:
At 4/26/2014 8:28:05 PM, daytonanerd wrote:
At 4/26/2014 8:06:23 PM, YYW wrote:
At 4/26/2014 1:51:26 PM, daytonanerd wrote:
At 4/26/2014 1:30:09 PM, YYW wrote:
This has got to be among the best DDO fanfics I've seen yet.

I just hope that the rest of the episodes that I write live up to this pilot.

I just wish Imabench would get his @$$ back to DDO and finish writing it. Daytona, you're a fantastic member and I'm sure you'd write this well... but it's really disappointing to see Bench bail on this.

I did send Ima a draft I have of the 2nd episode via Facebook, and he said that he liked it.

Dude, I'm sure it's fantastic -but I also wish that Bench would return to finish this.

Well, he won't come back unless the policy is repealed.

That's what he said in his farewell address...

I've talked to him about it. So it seems that the series is stuck with me.

I'd like for him to talk to me about it... and have a realistic discussion of what's actually happened since the policy's been implemented, and even more have a discussion about what's not happened. That's not the kind of conversation I want to have in the open forums, though, for practical reasons.

You can find him on Facebook.

I'd like to find him logged on to DDO.

You and I both know that it won't happen. It would take some serious effort to get him logged in again, with the policy still intact.
#FeeltheFreezerBern