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Comic relief

bluesteel
Posts: 12,301
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12/14/2014 3:34:28 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
If you're tired of the election, and just want a break, why not some comic relief. Post funny stuff here so its not all people obsessing over the election.

My submission, from TIFU (Today I Fvcked Up) on Reddit:

We were sitting around our Thanksgiving table talking about good childhood memories. It was just two of my older brothers, their wives, my sister, her husband, my mom, dad and me and my wife. My oldest brother brings up the topic of the painting in the attic. It was a painting of a naked lady. The face wasn't done, but the body was complete.

My next oldest brother says "Hey, that was MINE. I loved that painting" then he gets quiet. So naturally i'm now curious. "Why Charlie? Why do you like it so much?" I pester him for most of the meal just to be a dick. He finally blurts out "FINE, FVCK. I JERKED OFF TO IT ALL THROUGH MY TEENAGE YEARS. HAPPY NOW?" My mom turns bright red and blurts out "Oh Charlie, your father paid a guy when we were in Germany to paint this of me." While she's crying, he looked like someone shot him and everyone else at the table was mortified. It was the last Thanksgiving anyone in my family would attend together.

tl;dr my brother use to jerk off to a painting of my mother not knowing it was her.
You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into - Jonathan Swift (paraphrase)
bsh1
Posts: 27,503
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12/14/2014 3:38:28 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
One time, when I was little, I had a birthday party with some friends, and my mom wanted us all to blow out the candles. We're scattered all over the place, and she wants to summon my friends and my family to the table. So, she shouts out in the loudest voice possible: "Let's have a family blow!"

I didn't understand why all the adults thought that was so funny (and why my mom turned red) for many years.
Live Long and Prosper

I'm a Bish.


"Twilight isn't just about obtuse metaphors between cannibalism and premarital sex, it also teaches us the futility of hope." - Raisor

"[Bsh1] is the Guinan of DDO." - ButterCatX

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bluesteel
Posts: 12,301
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12/14/2014 3:39:41 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 12/14/2014 3:38:28 AM, bsh1 wrote:
One time, when I was little, I had a birthday party with some friends, and my mom wanted us all to blow out the candles. We're scattered all over the place, and she wants to summon my friends and my family to the table. So, she shouts out in the loudest voice possible: "Let's have a family blow!"

I didn't understand why all the adults thought that was so funny (and why my mom turned red) for many years.

lol, who is the best blowee from your family?
You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into - Jonathan Swift (paraphrase)
bsh1
Posts: 27,503
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12/14/2014 3:41:31 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 12/14/2014 3:39:41 AM, bluesteel wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:38:28 AM, bsh1 wrote:
One time, when I was little, I had a birthday party with some friends, and my mom wanted us all to blow out the candles. We're scattered all over the place, and she wants to summon my friends and my family to the table. So, she shouts out in the loudest voice possible: "Let's have a family blow!"

I didn't understand why all the adults thought that was so funny (and why my mom turned red) for many years.

lol, who is the best blowee from your family?

Me, obviously. I am the most enthusiastic.
Live Long and Prosper

I'm a Bish.


"Twilight isn't just about obtuse metaphors between cannibalism and premarital sex, it also teaches us the futility of hope." - Raisor

"[Bsh1] is the Guinan of DDO." - ButterCatX

Follow the DDOlympics
: http://www.debate.org...

Open Debate Topics Project: http://www.debate.org...
bluesteel
Posts: 12,301
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12/14/2014 3:44:20 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 12/14/2014 3:41:31 AM, bsh1 wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:39:41 AM, bluesteel wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:38:28 AM, bsh1 wrote:
One time, when I was little, I had a birthday party with some friends, and my mom wanted us all to blow out the candles. We're scattered all over the place, and she wants to summon my friends and my family to the table. So, she shouts out in the loudest voice possible: "Let's have a family blow!"

I didn't understand why all the adults thought that was so funny (and why my mom turned red) for many years.

lol, who is the best blowee from your family?

Me, obviously. I am the most enthusiastic.

lol, YYW is a lucky guy

I feel like straight girls should get lessons from gay guys in how best to "blow out candles"
You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into - Jonathan Swift (paraphrase)
bsh1
Posts: 27,503
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12/14/2014 3:45:38 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 12/14/2014 3:44:20 AM, bluesteel wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:41:31 AM, bsh1 wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:39:41 AM, bluesteel wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:38:28 AM, bsh1 wrote:
One time, when I was little, I had a birthday party with some friends, and my mom wanted us all to blow out the candles. We're scattered all over the place, and she wants to summon my friends and my family to the table. So, she shouts out in the loudest voice possible: "Let's have a family blow!"

I didn't understand why all the adults thought that was so funny (and why my mom turned red) for many years.

lol, who is the best blowee from your family?

Me, obviously. I am the most enthusiastic.

lol, YYW is a lucky guy

I think I am the lucky one.

I feel like straight girls should get lessons from gay guys in how best to "blow out candles"

Lol...
Live Long and Prosper

I'm a Bish.


"Twilight isn't just about obtuse metaphors between cannibalism and premarital sex, it also teaches us the futility of hope." - Raisor

"[Bsh1] is the Guinan of DDO." - ButterCatX

Follow the DDOlympics
: http://www.debate.org...

Open Debate Topics Project: http://www.debate.org...
YYW
Posts: 36,242
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12/14/2014 9:41:19 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 12/14/2014 3:45:38 AM, bsh1 wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:44:20 AM, bluesteel wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:41:31 AM, bsh1 wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:39:41 AM, bluesteel wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:38:28 AM, bsh1 wrote:
One time, when I was little, I had a birthday party with some friends, and my mom wanted us all to blow out the candles. We're scattered all over the place, and she wants to summon my friends and my family to the table. So, she shouts out in the loudest voice possible: "Let's have a family blow!"

I didn't understand why all the adults thought that was so funny (and why my mom turned red) for many years.

lol, who is the best blowee from your family?

Me, obviously. I am the most enthusiastic.

lol, YYW is a lucky guy

I think I am the lucky one.

Well, I think I'm the lucky one... but we'll have to agree to disagree on who is luckier ;)

I feel like straight girls should get lessons from gay guys in how best to "blow out candles"

Lol...

Having experienced both, guys tend to do a better job.... although I might be biased. The whole "gay" thing and all...
bsh1
Posts: 27,503
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12/14/2014 12:04:20 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 12/14/2014 9:41:19 AM, YYW wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:45:38 AM, bsh1 wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:44:20 AM, bluesteel wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:41:31 AM, bsh1 wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:39:41 AM, bluesteel wrote:
At 12/14/2014 3:38:28 AM, bsh1 wrote:
One time, when I was little, I had a birthday party with some friends, and my mom wanted us all to blow out the candles. We're scattered all over the place, and she wants to summon my friends and my family to the table. So, she shouts out in the loudest voice possible: "Let's have a family blow!"

I didn't understand why all the adults thought that was so funny (and why my mom turned red) for many years.

lol, who is the best blowee from your family?

Me, obviously. I am the most enthusiastic.

lol, YYW is a lucky guy

I think I am the lucky one.

Well, I think I'm the lucky one... but we'll have to agree to disagree on who is luckier ;)

Agree to disagree then :)

I feel like straight girls should get lessons from gay guys in how best to "blow out candles"

Lol...

Having experienced both, guys tend to do a better job.... although I might be biased. The whole "gay" thing and all...

Lol...
Live Long and Prosper

I'm a Bish.


"Twilight isn't just about obtuse metaphors between cannibalism and premarital sex, it also teaches us the futility of hope." - Raisor

"[Bsh1] is the Guinan of DDO." - ButterCatX

Follow the DDOlympics
: http://www.debate.org...

Open Debate Topics Project: http://www.debate.org...
SebUK
Posts: 850
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12/14/2014 12:35:41 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
I WILL DECIDE WHAT THIS DEBATE IS ABOUT. I AM SPIRITUAL, NOT RELIGIOYUS. YOU DONT HAVE TO BE RELIGIOUS TO BELIEVE IN GOD, AND YOU DO WORSHIP MONEY IF YOU CARE MORE ABOUT YOUR WALLET THAAN YOU DO THE POOR. YOU ARE A TROLL THAT IS OUT FOR ATTENTUION."- SitaraMusica