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20,000th Post...... DDO: A High School Story

imabench
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5/21/2016 7:19:22 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
So I have finally hit 20,000 posts, about 30 of which were ones that were any good, and I thought about celebrating this feat by doing the generic thing where I give shoutouts to people I really think are good members....... But that sounds dull and overdone.

So I considered giving a shoutout to ME instead and listing all the things that I have done.... But that sounded kinda selfish, and everyone on here knows im totally the most selfless person on here...... Im so selfless that I should get an award for it actually, thats how unselfish I am.

I then thought about using this thread to announce upcoming projects I am thinking of doing. But that stuff is classified. Very classified. So classified that I dont even know it myself.

So I decided to go balls-to-the-wall and invent something totally unique for my 20,000th post: DDO One Shots

People have been talking about/wanting to 'bring back fanfictions' for a while now..... Some people are even campaigning on it as part of their platform for the election..... Fanfictions though died for a reason, and I would know, because I invented DDO fanfictions and am also part of the reason why they died..... The main fanfiction I made: DDO The Walking Dead, lasted 38 episodes, with a sequel of the series lasting 12 episodes, for a total of 50 episodes..... 1 episode released about once a week for 50 weeks. There are only 52 weeks in a year, meaning that my fanfictions combined lasted almost a full year before anyone got any kind of closure from reading....

Could you imagine a debate lasting a year before its finally finished?
Would you read and vote on a debate lasting that long?

Of course not. You'd lose interest right away and pray to god that no one asked you to read it and offer any opinions on it......... Fanfictions died because many of them never ended properly, went on for way too long, or simply werent that interesting to begin with.... Any efforts to try to 'bring them back' wont work simple because of the nature of fanfictions..... They are long and drawn out that take forever to come to a close, which DDOians dont like. DDOians prefer things to be crisp and to the point. Instant Gratification.

'DDO one shots' that I am inventing here are a different type of fanfiction..... Rather than have 1 or 2 main characters, a cast of supporting characters, and a storyline that weaves through 50,000 characters or more over the course of several weeks or even months before being completed, if ever, A 'one shot' focuses almost entirely around 1 character, where their story begins and ends within a post or two....... . Then, if you have 5 or 6 of these 'one shot' stories hammered out, you can string them together to form a loose series of 'one shots' that although they are related, are not a fanfiction in the traditional sense..... They are crisp and to the point, and shine the spotlight on a variety of characters rather than just the same few batch of characters over and over again.

Maikuru made a post called 'DDO Class of 15' a while back that had inspired me to do a fanfiction of DDO High ever since I read it.

http://www.debate.org...

My fanfic of it never materialized though just because I didnt have it in me to do another long, drawn out fanfiction that would just end up not being read that much in the entertainment section of the site..... However, 'one shots' technically arent a fanfiction, at least in the traditional sense, since they can begin and end almost within the same post or thread. Because one shots technically arent the same thing as a fanfiction and also dont take up enough space to be considered as spam to those uninterested in reading it, they can be posted here in the main forum for everyone to glance through and applaud.

We may not be able to bring back old trends and fads, but we can certainly try to invent new fads and see if they catch on. This time: DDO One Shots.

So, without further ado, I present to you DDO: A High School Story:

(Quick disclaimer: Any and all character depictions in this series are simply caricatures, they are not meant to be defamatory in any way whatsoever)
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
imabench
Posts: 21,206
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5/21/2016 7:19:36 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
1 - The Class Clown

Class was about to begin, and everyone was buzzing with excitement despite it being 8am... It was Friday, today was pizza day, and for once there was NOT an attempted school shooting early in the morning... All the students were chatting about what they planned to do over the weekend before the teacher arrived.

1HARDER: "Bull... Sh**..."
IMABENCH: "I swear, I'm not trolling you, her vagina was THIS BIG." He outstretched his arms as far as he could, Thett3 giggled
YYW: "So what did you do next?"
IMABENCH: "I didn't know if I should stick my penis in it, or get a lantern and start exploring it like a cave in Skyrim, so I videotaped it"
1HARDER: "You VIDEOTAPED it???"
ENDARKENED: "What does a vagina look like?"

RoyLatham walked into class. He was a strict teacher who looked kind of like Snape from the Harry Potter franchise, if someone left Snape out in the pool too long and he got all pruney... He started class the same way he always did:

ROYLATHAM: "Today in Conservative-Revisionist-American-History, we will examine the catastrophe that was the Bill Clinton presidency..."

As usual with Roy starting class, no one paid attention. Except Bsh of course, who sat in the front row of every class and took meticulous notes. Everyone else kept chatting as they always did, disregarding Roy's warnings and waiting for the morning announcements to come on before quieting down.

IMABENCH: "It's already on youtube but the video got banned in 30 countries"
ENDARKENED: "Dude you shouldn't do that, that's not cool"
1HARDER: "Yeah you already got in trouble for fighting in the hallways a few days ago"
IMABENCH: "I didn't get in trouble for fighting, I got in trouble for being CAUGHT fighting..."
YYW: "Who did you get in a fight with this time?"
1HARDER: "I heard it was just some new kid"
THETT3: "Hey Ima before I forget, can you stop texting my sister asking if she wants to make babies with you? I dont even know how you got her number"
IMABENCH: "I'll stop texting her when she stops being SMOKING HOT"
ROYLATHAM: "Mr Bench, please be quiet"
IMABENCH: "Why am I always singled out? There's 6 other people talking over here yet IM the one you always single out!"

The intercom buzzed, and everyone quieted. Rather than the morning announcements like everyone expected, it was a message directly from the principal.

"Imabench to the principal's office, Imabench to the principal's office"

THE ENTIRE CLASS: "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
IMABENCH: "F*** me..."
1HARDER: "What did you do this time?"
IMABENCH: "I don't even know anymore. Watch my stuff"

Imabench walked out of class. The route from class to the principals office was one he knew very well, he had made the trip so many times that he could make the trip in his sleep. He only hoped he could make it to the Principals office without having to deal with the anal hall monitor along the way.

He turned around a few corners as classrooms turned into office rooms and made his way to the principals office. He didn't even knock on the door. He strode right in, sat down in the chair across from the Principal's desk, and prepared his number of snappy comebacks as he tried to lawyer himself out of another sticky situation.

The principal didn't look very happy.

AIRMAX: "Do you know why I called you in here?"
IMABENCH: "I plead the sixth!"
AIRMAX: ".......... It's the fifth amendment that says you have the right to remain silent"
IMABENCH: "I plead that one too..."
AIRMAX: "I called you in here because your latest altercation you got into is very serious. Do you know which one I'm talking about?"
IMABENCH: "I can honestly say that I don't know"
AIRMAX: "You put Brontoraptor in the hospital...."
IMABENCH: """.. Oh THAT....."
AIRMAX: "Yes, that's why you're here"
IMABENCH: "I'm here just for handcuffing Brontoraptor to the flagpole by his ankle? Come on that's only like the third craziest thing I've done this week..."
AIRMAX: "You're not here just for that...."
IMABENCH: "What else then?"
AIRMAX: "You handcuffed Brontoraptor to the flagpole, gave him a blunt hacksaw, told him you poisoned his drink, and said that to get the antidote he would have to cut off his left foot to free himself....."
IMABENCH: "I didn't think he'd actually DO IT."

AIRMAX: "Ima I am SICK of having to see you in my office all the time... Why would you do that to Brontoraptor?"
IMABENCH: "He made fun of Frozen"
AIRMAX: "That's not an excuse"
IMABENCH: "Watch the movie, you'll understand."
AIRMAX: "Ima a lot of people are calling for you to be expelled over this"
IMABENCH: "Oh come on this is Bronto we're talking about... If I did this to Bsh or something then okay yeah I deserve to get expelled, but I didn't do this to Bsh...."
AIRMAX: "It doesnt matter who you do these things to, only that you do them... Ive had several students have to transfer to another school just because you would constantly harass them."
IMABENCH: "Hey the last person I did that to was RationalMadman and lets face it, he was going to shoot up this place eventually.... You should be thanking me for getting rid of him"
AIRMAX: "Ima you need to change your behavior, I dont want to have to suspend you AGAIN"
IMABENCH: "When stupid people do stupid things I just can't help myself."

AIRMAX: "Do you want to have to take sensitivity training again?"
IMABENCH: "I'd rather tear off my d*ck and eat it for lunch...."
AIRMAX: "That's what I thought, but I don't want you to go through that because frankly I don't think it would work and that it would be a waste of resources..."
IMABENCH: "Okay then what else do you propose?"
AIRMAX: "Focus more on your school work... You get decent grades and are a smart kid, I don't understand why you insist on starting drama around here..."
IMABENCH: "Well I've had a lot of extra time on my hands since the movie club got shut down""
AIRMAX: "I know you liked that club a lot, but I had to shut it down due to funding issues, I'm sorry about that..."
IMABENCH: "I was good at that too. Did you see that video I made for the football team pep rally? That was some of my best work..."
AIRMAX: "Exactly. If you channel more of your time into doing something productive and helpful, then it will be easier for me to explain to people why I'm not expelling you for your behavior."
IMABENCH: "The movie club was the only thing I was good at though, apart from the debate team..."
AIRMAX: "You were kicked off of the debate team for telling your opponent to go f*** themselves..."
IMABENCH: "I still think I won that debate"

Airmax paused, an idea suddenly popping into his head.

AIRMAX: "What if I gave you the keys to the AV room?"

Imabench shifted from a defensive attitude to a curious one. "I'm listening."

AIRMAX: "Ive heard that you spend time between classes in there, and also most of lunch period as well... If I gave you access to the AV room for you to make videos for school purposes, would you be willing to control your behavior more?"
IMABENCH: "You're bluffing"

Airmax pulled out the key to the AV room from his desk and dangled it.

AIRMAX: "If you control your behavior and avoid getting into any fights, I'll let you have unlimited access to the AV room if you channel your energy into doing something productive for the school."
IMABENCH: "DEAL" He reached for the key, but Airmax hung on.
AIRMAX: "If I see you in here again, youre losing this privilege"
IMABENCH: "I'll be good, I promise"

Airmax let go of the key and let Ima have it. Ima's face lit up as if he had just been given matches, a gallon of gasoline, and a get-out-of-jail-free-card. He dashed out of the room, leaving Airmax with his thoughts as he wondered if this would actually work.
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
imabench
Posts: 21,206
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5/21/2016 7:19:59 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
2 - The Sports Star

YYW sat at his desk, waiting for Roy to finish rambling about whatever it is he was talking about... He had already packed his books and was ready to bolt out the door the second the bell rang, a clear shot out the door was available since Brontoraptor was not at his desk today for some reason...

He looked up at the clock yet again, there was still 5 minutes left in class.

Anxiously waiting for the bell to ring, YYW's eyes wandered to the one place they always liked to go in Roy's class.... To the back of Bsh's head. Bsh was not liked by some of the class for always earning top marks on Roy's notoriously tricky tests, and some even mistook him for a girl for some reason, but others thought he was absolutely brilliant, including YYW. He had tried to work on Bsh into going out with him, but unlike many of the notorious whores at DDO High, Bsh didnt give in..... He had rejected YYW's advances 3 times, the third time rather vehemently, despite him being the outstanding quarterback of the football team... But YYW was persistent. He wasn't going to give up so easily like he might have with anyone else being so resistant to him. He just needed to figure out a way to do things differently, a way to show Bsh a side of YYW he hadn't seen before, to get him to say yes for once.

The bell rang, and almost on instinct, YYW was out the door. He didnt have much time to waste.

He ran down three halls, turned two corners, plowed some nerd into the lockers where they started crying like a baby, and he entered the AV room in record time, cash already in hand.

YYW: "How's it looking?"

Imabench sat at a computer in the AV room. YYW had a deal with Ima where he would pay Imabench a couple bucks each week, and in exchange, Ima would edit together clips of YYW's football highlights for applications to colleges... 2 years of footage from YYW's early days as a QB for the school's football team already was yielding great results. Now as YYW entered his senior year, he was making more amazing plays than ever, and Imabench soon began running behind schedule trying to add in all the highlights of YYW from all of his games.... He was behind, but he was still doing great work.

IMABENCH: "That 14-35 loss on Friday didnt help me out very much but I still got these clips out of the game, along with the rest of the footage from the game before"

Imabench hit play, and YYW watched as Imabench's movie of him began. He had seen the beginning of the highlight video almost 50 times now, but every time, new footage of slick passes or QB scrambles for first downs were added to the montage, making YYW look like a future Heisman candidate....

YYW: "Looks great man, that new footage you added was from 3 games ago right?"
IMABENCH: "Thanks, and yeah its from 3 games ago, but I'll be able to be all caught up later today I think... Airmax gave me the keys to this place"
YYW: "Lol, No he didnt" He said in disbelief
IMABENCH: "Yes he diiiiiiid" Ima sang, dangling the keys in his hand for YYW to see
YYW: "How'd you get those???"
IMABENCH: "Airmax gave them to me as an incentive to not kill anybody or something"
YYW: "Nice man, here you go...." He handed Ima 20 bucks for his weekly payment and began to leave

IMABENCH: "Oh before you go, Danielle is selling some weed outside of the school, you might wanna go pick some up"
YYW: "Wait a minute.... You smoke weed?"
IMABENCH: "Pfft, No! I just buy it and sell it to the middle school kids down the street for three times the cost"
YYW: "Dude that is really f*cked up....."
IMABENCH: "Oh give me a break, they're in MIDDLE SCHOOL, who cares?..... Life is all downhill after that anyways"
YYW: "And what happens when Airmax finds out about this and threatens to take away the keys to this place?"
IMABENCH: "I'll do the same thing I always do when I get in trouble.... Say that im sorry, cry, and then yell HELP ME HELP ME MOMMY TOUCHED MY NO NO ZONE........... You know, the usual...."
YYW: "Whatever, how much is she charging?"
IMABENCH: "A $20 should do...." Ima replied, going back to editing YYW's videos. YYW quickly and quietly snuck out the door out of school to go get some weed. Danielle always had some really good stuff to sell, and he had bought weed from her before, along with steroids that dont show up in a urine test.

===========================================================================

Danielle stood at the corner, eyeing the high school she once attended. She made a good living as a business analyst, but she enjoyed spending time introducing kids of DDO to the great world of narcotics... She had done a decent amount of drugs over time, but she never did anything mega-addictive or anything in dangerous amounts.... Over time she had come to believe that the government was wrong to criminalize a great deal of drugs that were currently illegal, and so she sold drugs to high schoolers and college kids not to make money, but because she genuinely believed they should have the right to buy them if they really wanted to....

One of her clients then made her way towards her, a familiar face.

DANIELLE: "Looking for something to help you relax?"
YYW: "Imabench said you have some good stuff this week"
DANIELLE: "I sure do... I have half a pound of this new thing from Mexico called 'Hiroshima' thats supposed to be the next big thing.... It's some crazy stuff"
YYW: "How much will a $20 get me?"
DANIELLE: "A 20? Enough for you and a friend"
YYW: "Done"

They made the exchange.

DANIELLE: "So are you going to ask that guy out or what?"
YYW: "What?"
DANIELLE: "You know, that guy you've had your eye on. What's his name...."
YYW: ".....Bsh1....."
DANIELLE: "Yeah him"
YYW: "I'm working on asking him out, I just haven't figured out the best way yet"
DANIELLE: "Stop trying to 'play it cool' like you"ve tried in the past and just ask him. No need to be a baby about it"
YYW: "I'll ask him out the way I wanna ask him out" He defended, still wondering if he would even bother trying again.
DANIELLE: "Because that worked out so well the last three times right?"

YYW frowned, but pocketed the weed and took Danielle's advice to heart. He had one more class with Bsh later on today, and if he could loosen up a little by smoking some weed, maybe he would try asking him out again. YYW and Bsh were so different personality wise that getting stoned out of his mind might just show Bsh a different side of him that he really would want to be with, because Bsh sure as hell wasnt interested in the jockey, muscular, football-star qualities in him.

The warning bell rang and Danielle watched as YYW scurried back into DDO High. She remembered the valedictorian speech that she gave at graduation, where she praised the school and all it had done for her to open up her mind and all that, but part of her still wanted to burn the whole f*cking place to the ground and watch the place be reduced to rubble..... Watching flames consume manmade structures as nature reclaimed itself was always a sight that made Danielle feel at peace on the inside".

That, and weed. Good ole weed.....
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
imabench
Posts: 21,206
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5/21/2016 7:20:14 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
3 - The Hall Monitor:

I was the hero this high school deserved, AND the one that it needed right now... They just didnt realize it yet. Patrolling these halls enforcing the law isnt something that anybody could do, it takes guts. It takes courage, and you cannot show fear or mercy around here, otherwise you'll get eaten alive by these ungrateful peasants.........

Whiteflame patrolled the halls of the school as second period began... There were always a few stragglers in the halls at this time of day, it was only a matter of finding them. Armed with the gold badge Whiteflame made at home, A $10 set of sunglasses that served no valuable purpose whatsoever, skinny jeans, and now his secret weapon......... Industrial Strength Bear Mace capable of stopping an 800 pound godless killing machine right in its tracks

Time to enforce some muthafuckin JUSTICE up in here

There were two types of people who could be found in the halls at this time of day, freshman who didn't quite know the rules yet, or seniors who had run out of f*cks to give about the rules. God help whichever poor bastard crossed Whiteflame's path today.

He had already cleared three hallways before he had spotted the first violator that day. Some freshman hunched over a water fountain, earbuds still in his ears. He had no idea the bell wrung, and had no idea that Whiteflame was eying him from the other side of the hall.

Whiteflame sneered, this was gonna be too easy.

He dashed around the corner and sprinted full-speed at the target, coming at him like a runaway train. He had his badge in one hand, bear mace in the other, and an uncontrollable itch to use both on whatever poor sap he was about to knock the lights out of.

The freshman didnt even hear Whiteflame charging towards him until it was far too late. He had only turned his head by a fraction of a degree before Whiteflame had tackled him into some nearby lockers before pinning him to the ground.

WHITEFLAME: "HALL MONITOR!!! STOP RESISTING!!! WHERE IS YOUR HALL PASS, DIRTBAG?!?!?"
COLETRAIN: "Ow!! Stop, you're hurting me!"
WHITEFLAME: "WHERE IS YOUR HALL PASS? I WILL BEAR MACE THE SH** OUT OF YOU"
COLETRAIN: "It's there! Its over there!"

The hall pass Coletrain held while getting a drink was knocked out of his hand when Whiteflame blind-sided him, skidding across the floor a few feet away.... Whiteflame, keeping Coletrain pinned to the ground, stretched out his hand and grabbed the hall pass and examined it.

WHITEFLAME: "YOU THINK YOU"RE CLEVER? HUH??? DO YA????"
COLETRAIN: "What are you talking about?"

Whiteflame thrusted the hall pass in his face.

WHITEFLAME: "THIS HALL PASS SAYS YOU WERE GOING TO THE BATHROOM, YET HERE YOU ARE GETTING A DRINK OF WATER. HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THAT???"
COLETRAIN: "I just wanted to get a drink on my way!"
WHITEFLAME: "YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS?"
COLETRAIN: "What?"
WHITEFLAME: "DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE TIME IS?"
COLETRAIN: "No!"
WHITEFLAME: "IT'S 8:38, BUT YOU HAVE TO WAIT TIL 8:40 TO CHECK OUT A HALL PASS FOR THE SECOND PERIOD OF CLASS AFTER THE FIRST 10 MINUTES OF CLASS STARTS"
COLETRAIN: "Im sorry I didnt know!"
WHITEFLAME: "BULLSH**, YOURE GOING DOWN KID, TASTE BEAR MACE!"

===========================================================================

"What have I told you about using bear mace on students?"

Whiteflame sat in Airmax's office with his arms crossed, avoiding eye contact as Airmax scolded him.

AIRMAX: "This is the third time this week I've had to talk to you about using excessive force on students whiteflame.... Last week it was itching powder, and before that it was electrical cables hooked up to a car battery that you would then attach to a person's nipples...."
WHITEFLAME: "He was violating the rules!"
AIRMAX: "He had a hall pass"
WHITEFLAME: "The hall pass said he was going to the bathroom, not getting a drink of water. He also had only waited 8 minutes into the required 10 minute waiting period to ask for a hall pass to go-"
AIRMAX: "Whiteflame do you know why I made you the hall monitor?"
WHITEFLAME: "Because im the only one in this school who can do this job?"
AIRMAX: "Its cause you're the only person who applied...."
WHITEFLAME: "It aint easy to do this job"
AIRMAX: "It actually is, youre just making it way more complicated then it has to be"

Whiteflame stood up out of his seat, annoyed at how Airmax always was setting up roadblocks and preventing him from doing his job as Hall Monitor. Whether it be denying him the right to use lethal force as he saw fit, or saying he couldnt detain people for violating rules he had 'made up on the spot', Airmax always got in his way.

WHITEFLAME: "The only thing that prevents the hallways of these schools from being a post-apocalyptic hell is if someone is out there-"
AIRMAX: "Enforcing the rules because the rules keep people safe, I know, you"ve given me this speech before"
WHITEFLAME: "So what's the problem? Just let me go out there and let me do my job"
AIRMAX: "It's getting hard for me to do that because every other day youre in here for taking your authority as hall monitor WAY too far"
WHITEFLAME: "Well SOMEONE has to enforce the laws out there, what else is there to do, get rid of the Hall Monitor?"

Airmax paused. In doing so, he tipped his hand to Whiteflame, who looked mortified

WHITEFLAME: "You want to get RID OF THE HALL MONITOR POSITION?"
AIRMAX: "A lot of people think that Hall Monitor position doesn't serve a real purpose around here anymore, and that it only ever causes drama..."
WHITEFLAME: "The Hall Monitor is the person who does what the principal can't, enforce the rules of the hallways!"
AIRMAX: "And thats why I'm going to keep it, FOR NOW"

Whiteflame relaxed a little, but was still concerned

AIRMAX: "You can still be the hall monitor, but If I find you in my office again for misusing force, I"m going to terminate the Hall Monitor position... Is that understood?"
WHITEFLAME: "There needs to be someone out there to enfor-"
AIRMAX: "Is that... Understood....?"

Whiteflame relented. The writing was on the wall

WHITEFLAME: "Yes sir...."

Airmax motioned for Whiteflame to leave, and Whiteflame trudged out of his office, wondering what life would be like if he couldn't be a Hall Monitor. He wasn't about to let the position be extinguished, to do so would be an insult to the every Hall Monitor before him, even though the only other person to be Hall Monitor was F-16, who graduated last year. But to submit to Airmax's crazy policies that he couldnt use bear mace, or an improvised tazer, or a nailgun to enforce the rules of the Hall Monitor was arguably just as bad. The Hall Monitor would either have no real authority or not exist at all if Airmax got what he wanted....

Whiteflame then had an idea. Airmax said he couldnt USE excessive force, but he didnt say anything about THREATENING excessive force, and the students didn't know that either..... Whiteflame figured he could still use his bear mace as a threat to deter people from breaking the rules, because that wouldnt violate Airmax's orders.

A sly grin sneaked over Whiteflames face. He had found his calling again. He fastened his homemade badge to his shirt, pocketed the bear mace, and slid on his cheap pair of sunglasses

Time to enforce some muthafuckin justice up in here!
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
imabench
Posts: 21,206
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5/21/2016 7:20:26 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
4 - The Morning Announcements Kid:

Due to budget cuts at the school, the newspaper club was dissolved years ago and replaced with morning announcements where an announcer and 3 or 4 fellow students would work together to make the news in exchange for college credit... The announcer, Donald.Keller, was meant to give the announcements first thing in the morning, but recent school shootings in the morning along with a horde of muslim locusts pouring into the school cafeteria seeking refuge had pushed the announcements today from first period to the beginning of second period.

DONALD: "Are we ready to go?"

MassiveDump, a school administrator and the person who managed to convince Airmax to implement the morning announcements in the first place, nodded and gave a thumbs up. Donald pressed the red button on the microphone, playing the school theme song to get everyones attention.

INTERCOM: "HOLD UP, HEY, FOR MY N*GGAS WHO BE ACTING TOO BOLD, TAKE A SEAT, HOPE YOU READY FOR THE NEXT EPISODE, HEYYYYYY! SMOKE WEED EVERYDAYYYYYYY"

DONALD: "My name is Donald.Keller and here is today's news"

Donald looked down at the paper and began to read from line to line, sticking to the script and trying not to make any mistakes.

DONALD: "Lunch is still scheduled to take place at its regular time today after the swarm of locusts that flooded into the cafeteria from out of nowhere have been repopulated into other areas, and dealt with accordingly.... The lunch lady, who handled the entire operation, is to be commended for pulling off such a tremendous the feat... In an unrelated story, fried locust is now an option on the school menu..."

Donald paused and flipped over to the next page.

DONALD: "Also, another flamewar that erupted in the Religion classroom today was extinguished before classes began and before the fighting spilled over into Science or Politics classrooms. The flamewar proved to be quite extensive, but fortunately, the damage done to the Religion classroom itself was minimal, since 47 other flamewars dating back to Monday of this week alone had already destroyed anything that could have been damaged...... The petition of 5,000 signatures by school students to have the Religion classroom shutdown arrived at the front office this morning, and while no action from the staff has been formally announced, it should be noted that front office paper shredding is up 350% compared to all of last year."

(A collective groan is heard throughout the entire school)

Donald flipped over to the last page of his notes

DONALD: "And finally, the school has instituted a new rule where students who file to transfer out of the school have to have their mommies and daddies notarize the paper announcing their departure. This rule is meant to cut down on the number of transfer requests that previously did not require parental notice, which led to several dozens of students who said they were transferring out to end up transferring back into the school about a week to a month later.... This is DonaldKeller, DDO News, May 21st, 2015..... I mean 2016!.... 2016.... Sorry"

Donald pushed the red button on the microphone once again, and the intercom clicked off. He cursed himself out at messing up the date at the very end of the announcement, which ruined his streak of 17 straight announcements without a mistake, his longest streak ever.

MASSIVEDUMP: "You did great, don't worry about it. I doubt anyone will even care."
DONALD: "I guess so... Did you talk to Airmax about letting me and the guys take the rest of 2nd period off so that we can prepare the news for next Monday?"
MASSIVEDUMP: "Yeah he's fine with it. I gave a heads up to everyone else too, they're waiting for you in the News classroom."
DONALD: "Great, have a nice weekend!"

Donald walked out of the front office and scurried towards the News classroom, clutching his hall pass and hoping he could get there without getting maced by the hall monitor again. Everyone else was already in second period, so he got to the News classroom in record time.

He opened the door and walked in.

DONALD: "Who the hell put the year as 2015 instead of 2016 on my notes?"
IMABENCH: "That was my bad, I keep getting the years messed up"
DONALD: "Its MAY, you should be used to it by now"
IMABENCH: "You could have just said the correct year rather than read what I wrote"
ESOCIAL: "We've been over this before. No matter what you put on that paper, Donald will read it."
IMABENCH: "So its MY FAULT that Donald has the same disease as Ron f*cking Burgandy?"
DAYTONA: "Look lets just get this over with so that we don't have to come in early on Monday to do this, alright?"

Everyone sat down at the one table in the room. It was DK, Ima, Esocialbookworm, and Daytonanerd...

DONALD: "So what do we have for Monday?"
ESOCIAL: "The music program had its budget slashed again while the football team was granted a stash of penis pumps, we could run a story about misuse of school funds."
IMABENCH: "Can we push that story to Wednesday?"
DONALD: "Why?"
IMABENCH: "I know a guy on the football team who is about to ask someone out, and news of 'small-penis-syndrome' among the football team could mess up his odds of getting a date before he can even ask"
DAYTONA: "YYW is going to ask out BSH again?"
ESOCIAL: "Actually it would work better if we moved that story to Wednesday, because on Monday and Tuesday we are doing the two-part report about uber-christian students caught doing really gay things with each other in the Religion classroom after school hours..."

DONALD: "I thought Airmax banned us from doing that story"
ESOCIAL: "He did, but if we changed the names of the students who were caught doing it to preserve their identities, then he's okay with us airing the story"
DONALD: "What are we changing the names of the people in the article to?"
IMABENCH: "Well I recommended 'Shm-adcornishbiker and Shm-eogeer', but everyone else wants to be lame and go with 'Person A and Person B'..."
DAYTONA: "Its because adding 'shmuh' to the front of their names will still reveal who we are talking while trying to protect their identities"
IMABENCH: "Exactly!"
DONALD: "Go with Person A and Person B for that story. What else do we have for Monday?"

DAYTONA: "I also found something about the school switching fertilizers for the football field to a different brand to save money"
ESOCIAL: "So?"
DAYTONA: "So the brand they are using is made from dead SeaWorld whales...."
IMABENCH: "So?"
ESOCIAL: "............ You're not shocked that the school is fertilizing the football field with dead whales from SeaWorld?"
IMABENCH: "They're already dead so whats the harm?.... It's just making lemonade out of lemons... Or in this case dead SeaWorld whale carcasses..."
DONALD: "Lets definitely use the fertilizer story. We will still need a backup story to go with on Monday so that if the dead whale fertilizer story gets banned we still have something to replace it... Anyone have any ideas?"

There was an awkward silence at the table as everyone pretended to glance at their notes, hoping someone else would say something.

DAYTONA: "We could always make a passive-aggressive story where we complain about someone doing something without naming them by name..."

DONALD: "F*cking brilliant Daytona"
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
imabench
Posts: 21,206
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5/21/2016 7:20:38 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
5 - The Teachers Pet

Second period came to a close with everyone else giving their current event presentations. Bsh anxiously sat in the front row right in front of the teacher, his leg was bobbing up and down to burn off nervous energy. The teacher had given him a 97 on his last presentation rather than the full 100, and even though there was a 0.047829% chance it would effect his overall grade (Bsh calculated it out), he still wanted to try to convince the teacher to raise the grade before he had to go off to his least favorite period coming up next.... Gym.

The bell rang, and the class quickly scurried towards the door, many smaller kids being trampled.... Mirza's pet goat he had brought to class had suffered stage 4 Diarrhea near the end of class and had shat all over the floor, causing the entire room to smell as if.... Well, as if a goat just had stage 4 diarrhea in the room.

Bsh planted himself right in front of the teachers desk, patiently waiting to get his attention.

RYUU: "Your presentation on the impact of macro-economic affairs on Southeast Asian relations with the US was very interesting today" He began "But cramming such a detailed topic into a 2 minute class presentation might have confused some of the other students..."

BSH: "Will I get my grade marked down for that?"

Ryuu chuckled. "Bsh, the current events are done for a completion grade because state rules mandate that classes have at least 20 graded assignments be on the record in addition to tests and quizzes..... You"re not going to be penalized for going way above and beyond what is expected"

BSH: "The last current event I turned in got marked at a 97"
RYUU: "......... Okay?"
BSH: "I was wondering why it wasn't a 100"
RYUU: "Oh. Let me see if I have it."

Ryuu, after putting a clothespin over his nose to block out the scent of rotten liquified goat feces, dug around in his bag to see if he could locate Bsh's last paper. He found it with ease, since Bsh was the only person in his class, ever, to actually laminate his current-event assignment that individually was worth 0.3% of one's overall grade.

RYUU: "Here it is" He said, pulling out the paper
BSH: "So what was wrong with it?"

Ryuu scanned the paper.

RYUU: "Oh, see here, you forgot to put your name on it..."

Sure enough, Bsh's assignment, which was color coded, laminated, and given a file number for the filing system that Bsh recommended to Ryuu to use for filing assignments, was left blank for where people were supposed to write their names.

BSH: "Oh no....."
RYUU: "Yeah.... Forgetting to write your name on a current event is an automatic 10 point deduction, but I lowered it to 3 since I could already tell from..... Well, EVERYTHING.... That this was your paper...."

BSH: "Is there anything I can do to raise my grade?"
RYUU: "Bsh its alright..... The 3 points on this assignment are worth such a small amount of your overall-"
BSH: "0.047829% to be precise..... I did the math..... Four times......"
RYUU: "Right...... Your grades you've gotten so far in the class are more then high enough to not be affected by 3 missed points on a current events assignment that, between you and me, is barely worth any grade at all....."
BSH: "But if hypothetically speaking I got a 87 on the final exam, an 84 on the final exam practice test before class, missed 3 other current events prior to that point due to an unexpected illness i might contract that would bar me from being able to email the assignment....."

RYUU: "Bsh, it will be fine....."
BSH: "But what if it ISNT?"
RYUU: "Bsh I already gave you back 7 points of the 10 that was docked from the grade in the first place...."
BSH: "But there is a scenario in place where-"
RYUU: "And you"ve never gotten below a 94 on any assignment that we've had so far...."
BSH: "Hypothetically speaking-"

Ryuu quieted him and lowered his own voice.

RYUU: "If it really comes down to being the difference between an A++ and an A+ for you, I promise Ill go back and give you the rest of the 3 points...."
BSH: "But for peace of mind could you adjust the grade now rather than wait until-"
RYUU: "Bsh youre running late for your next class"

BSH: "Oh crap, oh CRAP!..... Alright, I'll just email you a 30 slide powerpoint presentation of why its in your best interest to raise the grade up to a 100, I have to go"

Ryuu waved Bsh out the door and got ready to leave himself.... He stopped on the way out to look at Mirza's goat's diarrhea, which had begun to dissolve a hole in the floor and settle in the classroom down on the first floor beneath them. Ryuu laughed and then walked out as if he hadn't noticed it.

===========================================================================

Bsh darted through hallways, hoping not to be tackled and/or electrocuted by the hall monitor for running 7 mph in a 5 mph zone, making his way towards his locker. He looked at his watch to see that Ryuu had lied to him, and that he still had a good 5 minutes to get to gym class before class started. Ryuu had tricked him into thinking he was running late in order to get rid of him.

YYW: "Hey there hot thaaaaang"
YYW leaned on a locker near Bsh in another attempt to try to ask him out, and Bsh was not having any of it.

BSH: "Not now YYW"
YYW: "Easy there, just relax while I ask you something"
BSH: "No, I do not want to go out with you, for the fourth time."
YYW: "I wasnt going to ask if you wanted to go out with me...."
BSH: "What then?"
YYW: "........ Okay I was going to ask if you wanted to go out with me....."
BSH: "Ugh"

He tried to push past YYW on his way to gym

YYW: "Wait, you smell that?"
Bsh sniffed the air. "Yeah?"
YYW: "Thats what being in love smells like"
BSH: "You smell like weed"
YYW: "........................................... Love smells like that sometimes"
BSH: "Look I have to go"
YYW: "Please?"
BSH: "Youre begging me to go out with you?"
YYW: "I just think that........ We have so much in common"
BSH: "You're stoned...."
YYW: "Ask me a question only a smart person could have a good answer to, I guarantee Ill be able to impress you with my grains..... I mean brains"

Bsh rolled his eyes and thought about it, if he could give YYW a ridiculously complex question he was bound to fail, he could thwart YYW's attempt to ask him out, as long as persuade him from not trying again in the future.

BSH: "Okay.... Astronomers postulate that because the size of the universe can only be observed by 14 billion light years, since light has not traveled far enough for the rest of the universe to be seen here on Earth, that the entire universe itself may actually be just part of a structure that forms the shape of something rather than just expands into infinite abyss...... Do you believe in some other belief of the overall shape of the universe, or do you instead have a reasonable belief of what the actual shape you think the universe is?"

YYW: ".......................................... I hope it looks like a boob"

Bsh rolled his eyes so hard they almost rolled back into his own brain. "Im out of here"

YYW: "Wait, don't, I'm sorry, let me try again!............ I think it"s a rhombus!"
BSH from a distance: "You don't even know how to SPELL rhombus!"
YYW, louder in response: "DATE ME AND I'LL PROVE YOU WRONG"
WHITEFLAME: "DO I HEAR SOMEONE YELLING IN THE HALLWAYS???"
YYW: "Oh sh**...."
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
imabench
Posts: 21,206
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5/21/2016 7:20:55 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
6 - The ROTC Kid

Lannan13 got ready for gym class as fast as he could. He had to change out of his military uniform into his gym clothes, which was far more time-consuming to do than changing out of regular clothes that everyone else was wearing. Lannan though absolutely loved gym class, he kicked wholesale a** in just about any sport the gym teacher, TUF, had decided for that day, he was regularly one of the first kids picked due to his sheer athleticism, and had he not been in ROTC he easily could have made any one of the junior varsity school teams the school had....

IMABENCH: "I swear to god he better not make us run laps all period again...."
MIKAL: "Im praying to Satan right now hoping he doesn't"

Mikal lit candles in his gym locker which was decorated with a dark red paint and dominated by a goat-headed bust of Satan kneeling over a pile of skulls. Mikal then began chanting, which consisted almost entirely out of deep-throated groaning in Latin and offering a dead bird as sacrifice.

LANNAN: "Isn"t it illegal to have candles in school?"
MIKAL: "Nope..... Texas legalized candles in schools if they are used for school prayer, but thanks to a loophole in that same law, Satanism is covered by the school prayer laws making this completely legal". Hail Satan."

Mirza walked into the room, causing Thett3 to freak out.

THETT3: "HE'S GOT A BOMB!!!"
LANNAN: "Thett that's a clock...."
THETT3: "IT LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE A BOMB"
MIRZA: "Capitalist swine Lannan13 is right, it is just a clock.... My goat ate the rest of the bomb...."
FAMOUS: "Thett keep your voice down, could you imagine the field day people would have if a school in Texas arrested a Muslim kid for mistaking a clock as a bomb?"
LANNAN: "I think something like that has happened before actually"
SMITHEREENS: "Is the goat okay?"
MIRZA: "Yes, his internal organs will survive as long as someone does not mutter the trigger code."
SMITHEREENS: "No I mean is the goat okay mentally. How does he feel about having a live bomb inside him?"
MIKAL: "Smithereens can you cut the philosophical crap for a second? Im trying to worship Satan over here".. Jesus Christ."
MIRZA: "I do hope we run laps today. Running without hope is the national sport of my home country, YugoRomanovia."

F-16 walked into the locker room. "Alright guys, everyone to the gym.... We're playing dodgeball today!"

LANNAN: "YES!"
MIKAL: "PRAISE MERCIFUL SATAN!"
MIRZA: "Damn corrupted, capitalist Satan....."
IMABENCH: "Hey YYW you got any of that weed left?"

Lannan led the excited class from the locker room into the gym, which unlike the rest of the school was somewhat presentable and well constructed.... School funding for sports actually made the gym the only part of the school that met Texas building codes, which were already lax to begin with. As they all poured into the gym, F-16 didnt even have to tell people to line up since everyone minus Mirza was already excited to play.

TUF: "Captains today will be..." He glanced at his attendance sheet. "YYW and Lannan"
YYW: "Who gets to pick first?"
TUF: "The person with the better attendance record always gets to pick first, in this case its Lannan"

YYW and Lannan stood across from the rest of the class and began picking teams. YYW picked Bsh, Ima, Mikal, 000ike, Thett3, Esocial, and Donald.Keller.... Lannan picked Tulle, Maikuru, ADreamofLiberty, PetersSmith, Whiteflame, Marie, and Mirza.

YYW: "Ugh, literally everyone on Lannan's team are people I despise...."
IMABENCH: "Good, they'll all aim for you instead of me for once...."

Both teams lined up on opposite sides of the gym with each person given a red ball. There was no point in trying to come up with a gameplan since everybody only ever tried to nail the people on the other team they hated the most.....

F-16: "GO!"

Red balls began flying everywhere. It was a bloodbath. The balls they were using weren't red rubber balls typically used in high schools though. The school had decided to use red balls filled with low-grade cement rather than air, because Texas state law mandated that air in Texas must not be wasted for anything other than 'filling the lungs of the white man'.

Because, Texas....

Lannan immediately became the MVP in the game on his team. He caught two throws, saving one of his teammates, delivered a 60 mph cement-ball headshot to Thett3 even though he was aiming for Imabench, and soon enough people were lining up the sidelines, trying to stop the flow of blood from noses, mouths, and yes, even penises.

YYW though also led his team fairly well, being hit almost immediately but then getting tagged back in by a catch from Ima, before Ima was knocked out of the game by a wicked shot thrown by Tulle, who doesnt f*ck around while playing dodgeball..... YYW picked off other people in the game until after a minute or so it was just YYW on one side of the field against Lannan13 and Mirza on the other, Mirza somehow surviving being hit despite the flurry of shots aimed at him.

There were 2 balls left on the court. YYW held one in front of him in defense, the other was near Mirza's feet, all the way on the other side of the court from where Lannan was.

LANNAN: "Toss me a ball!"
MIRZA: "I will not partake in game with pawn for capitalist government like you"
LANNAN: "Just toss me the ball come on!"
MIRZA: "You wish to serve for military of worst nation ever, I will not help you"

Lannan took matters into his own hands. He tried to dash across his side of the gym to get the ball right at Mirza's feet before YYW could try to throw at him. He slid near the ball as if he was sliding into third base in a baseball game, but Mirza bent down and tried to keep the ball away from him, resisting.

LANNAN: "What are you doing???"
MIRZA: "I am doing my duty to resist American swine at all costs!"
LANNAN: "Give me the ball you idiot!!!"

Lannan's team demanded Mirza give Lannan the ball, but it was no use. While the two of them faught for the ball, YYW used the one he had and whirled it at both of them. The ball hit Lannan right in the arm, before ricocheting and hitting Mirza's arm as well.... Getting both of them out.

F-16: "YYW's team wins!"

YYW's team started cheering and jumping in disbelief, while Lannan's team accosted Mirza.
MAIKURU: "Mirza why did you do that?"
TULLE: "We almost won!"
MARIE: "Your mom should have aborted you!"

Mirza sneered though, proud of himself. "Let it be known on this day that I, Mirza, bested you all by sabotaging capitalist government pawn of worst nation in history-"

Mirza got cut off, as Lannan clenched a fist and punched Mirza in the face as hard as f*cking possible.

Mirza hit the floor hard, with several teeth landing on the other side of the gym. There was a pop as Lannan's fist nailed Mirza's face, leading many to think his jaw was broken even though it wasn't.

YYW: "Lannan you are my goddamn hero" he said to him after a stunned silence.

The rest of the period was spent mopping up blood off the floor, with almost everyone stopping and congratulating Lannan at some point for knocking the living sh*t out of Mirza, making Lannan a school celebrity in an instant.
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
imabench
Posts: 21,206
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5/21/2016 7:21:14 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
7 - The Stoner Kid

Wylted sat in the back of the class as fourth period started, blazed out of his mind. The new kid sitting next to him, Cole Train, looked as if he had been maced in the face, but as the drugs kicked in, ColeTrain morphed to look like a very upset Mushu from the movie Mulan, causing Wylted to feel bad for him. Wylted kept offering Coletrain snacks because he looked sad and wanted to try to cheer him up. Wylted though had mixed weed with psychedelic mushrooms and 3 ounces of iridium nitrate, so he didn"t even notice that the "snacks' he was offering to Coletrain was actually just hair he had pulled out of his own head just moments earlier, causing him feel and look even more uncomfortable.

At the front of the class, not that Wylted noticed, ResponsiblyIrresponsible was lecturing on economics, giving everyone in the classroom an effective brain*cking who weren"t already being brain*cked by powerful hallucinogens. Meanwhile, Mirza had been sent home after being caught trying to construct another bomb to blow up the school, Inferno was skipping class yet again, Imabench was shooting spitballs at people he didn"t like, Marie was giving birth in the second row, and Bsh was taking notes at the front of the classroom".. Just another typical Friday.

Class went by, and Wylted could only fantasize about his teeth falling out of his mouth, becoming people, and starting a rock band with them called "My Shiny Teeth and Weed". They would play in Denver, Seattle, and those were the only cities Wylted could think of.

"WYLTED!"

Wylted tried to look at the teacher who had called his name and act like he was paying attention.

WYLTED: "I swear, Weed, im not on, to". Jesus"
JOEY: "You mean you swear to Jesus you"re not on weed?"
WYLTED: "Whoaaaa man you can read minds? That makes you a".. Jedi!"
JOEY: "Wylted everyone else has left. Its lunchtime"

Sure enough, the classroom was empty, minus an umbilical cord underneath Marie"s desk. The class had been dismissed without Wylted even noticing.

WYLTED: "They were already gone when I first got here"

Joey rolled his eyes, but then got an idea". He was operating in a drug ring taking place within the school and needed to run a message to one of the science teachers to hide some contraband". However, he was under suspicion for being in a drug ring, and couldn"t meet with his regular shady business partners as usual. Wylted being stoned though could run the message, and would be too high to read the message himself, or even remember what he did once the drugs wore off.

It was risky, but Joey was in a tight spot, and had no other choice.

JOEY: "Wylted, I have a mission for you"
WYLTED: "From who?"
JOEY: "From me"
WYLTED: "Who sent you?"
JOEY: """".. God"
WYLTED: "Siiiiiiiiiick!"
JOEY: "Yes it is Wylted, and God needs your help"
WYLTED: "Uh-huh"
JOEY: "I want you to take this message..."
WYLTED: "Uh-huh"
JOEY: "And give it to the lunch lady"
WYLTED: "Uh-huh"
JOEY: "And don"t tell anyone else about this"
WYLTED: "Uh-huh"
JOEY: "DO you understand?"
WYLTED: "Uh-huh"
JOEY: "Are you just saying "uh-huh" because you"re too high to think of any other words?"
WYLTED: """"""""""""""""". Uh-huh"

Joey rolled his eyes. This was really risky, but he needed to get the message delivered, otherwise the 5 eastern European women he had in his basement were going to need to be 'disposed of.'

===========================================================================

Wylted was shoved out into the hallway after Joey drilled into his head what he had to do. He stood in the hallway, swaying, trying to stand as still as possible because the floor around him had turned into lava.

"WHERE"S YOUR HALL PASS???"

Whiteflame stood at the other end of the deserted hallway. The hallways were supposed to be clear during lunch, and Wylted was in clear violation of that. Wylted though clearly never cared for the rules, and Whiteflame knew that. The two of them had clashed many times in the past, often when Wylted was completely high.

WHITEFLAME: "WHERE"S YOUR HALL PASS WYLTED? YOU BETTER NOT BE STONED"
WYLTED: "STOP YELLING AT ME SHREK, IM DELIVERING A MESSAGE TO THE LUNCH LADY FROM GOD"

Yep, he"s high. Whiteflame thought to himself

Whiteflame put a hand near his bear mace. Wylted was no ordinary student for him to deal with, he was held back several times due to his preference to get high all the time, and was the size of a full-grown adult.... 6 Foot 3 and 250 pounds of 'you-dont-want-none-of-this-boy". Whenever he and Whiteflame clashed, Wylted usually won.

WHITEFLAME: "IF I DONT SEE A HALL PASS RIGHT NOW IM GOING TO HAUL YOU RIGHT TO AIRMAX HIMSELF!"
WYLTED: "F*CK YOU SHREK, FIONA DESERVES BETTER THAN YOU!"

Wylted then charged full steam at Whiteflame, and Whiteflame froze. He wasn"t allowed to use any force against students, but Wylted was charging right at him like a bear who was also completely high on god knows what. He charged at him with 250 pounds of Texas fury with the full intention of plastering Whiteflame onto the wall before escaping.

Whiteflame dug in his heels and whipped out his bear mace.

WHITEFLAME: "I WILL MACE YOU LIKE IVE NEVER MACED YOU BEFORE IF YOU DONT STOP RIGHT NOW"
WYLTED: "FOR THE LUNCH LADYYYYYYYYYY!!!"

===========================================================================

"What have I told you about using bear mace on students?"

Whiteflame sat in Airmax's office with his arms crossed, avoiding eye contact as Airmax scolded him.

AIRMAX: "Do you realize how much damage was done to the school cause of your actions?"
WHITEFLAME: "Wylted charged at ME, I was only defending myself"
AIRMAX: "You sprayed bear mace at Wylted when he was high off his a** which caused him to go into an insatiable rage that destroyed half the school!"
WHITEFLAME: "It wasn"t THAT bad"
Airmax looked at a sheet of paper on his desk. "6 doors torn off from their hinges, 25 roof and ceiling tiles digested, 3 students missing fingers or toes, and Wylted gave someone a "Hungarian Meat Grinder""
WHITEFLAME: "Whats that?"

Imabench walked in.

IMABENCH: "It involves a funnel, broken glass, and the part of the penis where the pee comes out"

AIRMAX: "Ima please wait in the hallway, Im having a discussion with Whiteflame"
IMABENCH: "About what?"
WHITEFLAME: "He"s abolishing the Hall Monitor position because he thinks it only ever causes drama."
IMABENCH: "WHAT??? AIRMAX YOU CANT DO THAT!!! THE HALL MONITOR POSITION IS VITAL TO THE FUNCTION OF THE SCHOOL AND ABOLISHING IT WOULD CAUSE IRREVOCABLE HARM-"
AIRMAX: "Ima if you don"t leave my office right now I"ll tell your mother that you lit 3 cats on fire during lunch""
IMABENCH: "It was ONE cat that I lit on fire THREE TIMES."
WHITEFLAME: "Why would you light a cat on fire three times???"
IMABENCH: "Why would I get another cat and light it on fire instead? You"re a sick f*ck Whiteflame""
AIRMAX: "OUT!"

Imabench scurried out of Airmax"s office and closed the door behind him. Airmax turned to Whiteflame.

AIRMAX: "You were on thin ice, and then this happened". Turn in your badge and your effects."

White flame stood up and cautiously emptied his pockets onto Airmax"s desk. He put down his badge, the bear mace, a tear-gas grenade, 3 pistols, 2 flash-bang grenades, an MP44, a military grade rocket launcher, and a note Whiteflame tried to forge that said "I totally did this. -YYW". Without any more words being said, Whiteflame shuffled out of Airmax"s office..... Still in disbelief that he lost his job due to a total pothead.
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
imabench
Posts: 21,206
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5/21/2016 7:21:37 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
8 - The Lunch Lady

Joey's message failed to deliver. What a f*cking idiot. He thinks he had problems with the 5 women he needs to get rid of? His f*ck up caused me to have to pull some Heisenberg-level sh*t from Breaking Bad to cover up all these operations!

The lunch lady scrambled to dispose of all the evidence. Lunch had ended and all the "free-loader pc correct kids being coddled" had shuffled out of the cafeteria to "go be a burden on the system elsewhere", so she only had 2 more periods before she had to close up for the day. If she couldn"t get it all done by then, she would be f*cked.

Because the school had such tight finances, they could only afford to have one lunch lady do all the work in the cafeteria, which gave her access to all kinds of cooking equipment with almost zero interference from anyone else. Her past criminal record for drug trafficking also wasn"t discovered by the school, because they chose to skip the $5 background check to save money. Had they ordered the background check, they would have found out that the lunch lady had a huge list of convictions ranging from drug smuggling, drug manufacturing, murder, vehicular manslaughter, and even necrophilia. However, they had no idea she was a criminal mastermind, and one of the lunch lady"s clients was the school health inspector so she could bribe her way out of almost anything.

This time was different though. The fuckin feds were coming now that a Texas law requiring federal employees be shot on site was ruled unconstitutional. She couldnt pay or bribe her way away from these people, and her fallback option, which was Joey had failed to do the one thing that would have stalled their visit until 3 weeks later. she had to act quick, and she had to act fast.

First, she had to dispose of all the meth. She had loads of pet cats that she used to send messages to others in secrecy since everyone only looked at them as strays. She began shoving as much of the meth as possible down their furry throats, trying to get them to overdose as quickly as possible. Dead cats would be a red flag to the health officials, but they would simply refer the case to another branch of the Department of Agriculture, since feline animal deaths would fall under their jurisdiction compared to health inspectors.

The lunch lady stuffed as much meth as she could down their throats but it wasnt enough, a lot of the cats were simply choking to death on the mass quantities of meth or scattered away due to the effects of the drugs kicking in. They started dying one by one, but there was still 90 pounds of meth to dispose of.

The lunch lady took one of the dead cats and plopped it on the table. She couldnt cut open the cat and shove meth inside it, because any trace of blood would raise the suspicion of the health inspectors, and only lead to further more frequent inspections. She could try to shove some meth right into the cats' anuses, but there was simply too much product to get rid of to waste time shoving it up cats a**holes.... Time was of the essence, and she needed to get rid of it fast.

The lunch lady then had an idea. The high quality meth she manufactured could easily be mistaken for ice, and the industrial sized freezers could help her hide it in plain sight. She opened the fridge doors and peered inside. Cheap frozen goods of all kinds were stacked up on racks all the way to the back of the freezer, and all the meth was packed into clear bags each holding 2 pounds each, so she could easily make them look like ice packs to keep the food cold.

The problem was that freezing the product could ruin it, and if she was going to make her next delivery, she wouldnt be able to start from scratch if all of her product was ruined. The lunch lady decided to put half the bags into the freezer, because she could afford to remake half of it if the freezing temperatures did ruin it.... She loaded in the meth, and decided that the other 40 pounds could be stored in the tiles of the ceiling. The ceiling tiles were meant to support any weight of up to 10 pounds before cracking, but the school to save money bought defective tiles that could only hold up to 3 pounds. If she stacked one bag of meth behind every ceiling tile she could get to, that would leave her with just under 3 bags of meth left to hide.

Time ticked by though as the lunch lady hid all of her meth. There was only 1 period left before classes let out and the health inspectors arrived, and she was only halfway through hiding the bags int eh ceiling tiles. in addition to the meth, she also was going to have to stash the equipment used to make the meth somewhere as well. Any idiot wouldn't be able to tell the difference between meth equipment and normal cooking equipment, but the federal agents likely wouldn't be fooled, so the equipment had to be stashed somewhere as well. The ceiling tiles were also becoming increasingly hard to reach and set back in place with the meth still in store, minutes were ticking by quicker and quicker.

Just 10 minutes left. There were 10 bags of meth left adding up 20 pounds total, and still the cooking equipment to hide somewhere. The lunch lady struggled to reach the most difficult ceiling tiles to hide meth behind, and time began to run out even quicker than usual.

"Sorry Im late, I was wondering if we could-"

The lunch lady whipped out a silenced Colt 45 and shot the intruder on instinct, putting a bullet right into the person's heart.

It was SolonKR, a student who volunteered in the cafeteria for community service hours. Solon was the only person who didnt consider the lunch lady as some type of weird monster like everyone else did, and was more then happy to volunteer in the cafeteria. His body fell to the floor, but the lunch lady caught him.

LUNCH LADY: "F*ck! f*ck f*ck f*ck fuckin F*CK!!"

She had to act fast. If any blood got on the floor, it would ruin everything. The whole jig would be up. Solon was still alive, trying to squirm and call for help, but the lunch lady quickly silenced him by knocking him out with a bag of meth.

LUNCH LADY: "Im sorry, but I dont have any other choice...."

===========================================================================

The inspection went off without a hitch. The inspectors didnt find any violations in the kitchen and left with no further inquiries. The lunch lady looked stone-cold as ever as Joey finally relaxed, all suspicion finally erased.

JOEY: "I cant believe you pulled it off"
LUNCH LADY: "It wasnt easy, but you forget. Im a professional."
JOEY: "The meth in the freezer was brilliant, but where did you put the equipment?

The lunch lady led Joey out the backdoor of the school, towards the creek she had chucked her meth cats into. After squatting down near the edge, she reached in and grabbed Solon's carcass, hauling it out of the water. His ribcage had been opened up, and inside where his organs used to be, now there were the remaining bags of meth and the cooking equipment.

The lunch lady used Solon's carcass to hide the remaining contraband.

JOEY: "Oh my God! Thats SICK!"
LUNCH LADY: "It had to be done"
JOEY: "I dont even know who you are anymore!"
LUNCH LADY: "You know EXACTLY who I am...... Say my name"
JOEY: "What?"
LUNCH LADY: "Say. My. Name."

A heavy silence hung in the air that lasted a full 30 seconds

LUNCH LADY: "Do it. Say my name....."
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

JOEY: ".................. Sadolite"
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

LUNCH LADY: "Youre goddamn right"
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
imabench
Posts: 21,206
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5/21/2016 7:22:05 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
9 - The Principal

Airmax sighed deeply after he tried to put the past week behind him. So much crazy things happen on an hourly basis at DDO High that he still gets amazed at himself over how he can handle it all" In the past week alone there were 3 attempted bombings, 4 hijacked flights, 17 pregnancies, 4 harvested organs, 6 overdoses, 9 stabbings, 8 fires"" And the crazy thing was that those statistics were all rather tame for DDO High. In a particularly bad week there were up to 176 accidents before lunch period even started".

But another week was in the past, and another weekend of drinking away all his problems was finally here..... Thank Satan the Packers were playing this weekend.... Airmax offered a quick prayer to a statue of Aaron Rodgers that hung on his wall, and began cleaning up his desk. He was all done with official school business, but there was still one issue left for him to address before he could leave.

Once every few months, the teachers and faculty of DDO, present and former, would gather after school to discuss how to keep the school functioning. DDO High would have died out a long time ago had the school Superintendent had his way.... He, Juggle, had always had a complete lack of interest in the school in the hopes to see it condemned, so that then he could try to buy the land under it and rebuilt it into something more profitable, like a casino or a meth lab. To get his way, Juggle always tried to deny funding to the school and even take funding away from it whenever he could legally, the state laws of Texas giving him ample amounts of power to do so. Airmax though, by coordinating with former faculty and teachers, always came up with ways to get around Juggle to keep the school functioning, taking on themselves to keep things alive rather then let the site die and go somewhere else..... As crazy as DDO High was, every person who taught or worked there for a substantial amount of time had grown an unbreakable attachment to it, where no matter how much it drove them crazy or how many times they were almost maimed or killed, they only ever wanted to do their best to keep the school running so that other generations could share the experience they had while they worked there.....

The faculty met in the same part of the school they always met in: the arena under the school. Although the superintendent didnt know it, DDO was actually built on the ruins of an old Mayan temple called 'The Alamo', or something..... Nobody could remember why the ruins were significant and eventually it was simply forgotten. The original structure was bulldozed to the ground but the underground rooms were left intact, making it an ideal place to hold meetings in secret. Also to store meth, as the lunch lady found out on her own.

Airmax strode through the hallways until he came across a broom closet. Closing the door behind him, a keypad materialized out of the wall to grant entrance underground. All Airmax or any faculty had to do was type in the password.

AIRMAX: "Nine........ Nine....... Nine..................................... Nine"
KEYPAD *click*

The school started shaking and walls suddenly started moving out of place. The whole school was changing like some sort of Indiana Jones + Doctor Strange crossover scene, eventually leading Airmax to a dimly lit tunnel that was illuminated only by a single torch. airmax picked up the torch and followed the tunnel.

After crossing a moat, dodging a boulder, killing 5 native americans, and remembering the Alamo, Airmax finally arrived at the meeting room, where several other people were waiting for him.

AIRMAX: "How did you all get here so fast?"
KOOPIN: "We found a tunnel that makes it to get into this place that doesnt require the entire school shifting like an earthquake is taking place.
AIRMAX: "Where does it let out?"
FREEDO: "Starbucks"
AIRMAX: "You guys go to Starbucks?"
IZBO: "Ive found that their pumpkin-spiced drinks help me keep my cool"
AIRMAX: "Thats probably for the best..."
INNOMEN: "Anyone know what time it is? I left my watch in the car"
I-AM-A-PANDA: "Its 4:20"
KLEPTIN: "AYYYYYYYYYYYY"
AIRMAX: "Since we're all here, lets get started."

For the next several hours, Airmax and all the other faculty discussed ideas and tactics for improving DDO and keeping it functioning. Some had information on what Juggle's next move was going to be to try to put DDO in a pinch, while others mentioned ways they learned of hiding money away from Juggle that Juggle wouldnt be able to touch or would even be able to find. All of them brought many ideas to the table that was all that kept DDO running. Without this group and their meetings, DDO undeniably would have been shut down years ago.

The conversation went on for a while before Innomen spoke up

INNOMEN: "I think we should also consider attacking Juggle directly"

Everyone groaned and rolled their eyes.

KOOPIN: "The last time, we tried a full assault on Juggle before and it was a spectacular failure. We lost so many good people on that day...."
FREEDO: "Not to mention we would be completely out gunned.... The Texas Department of Education shares the same building with the NRA's Headquarters and the Texas National Guard Armory, we would be cut to shreds before we even got to their front lawn..."
KLEPTIN: "We also barely have the same man-power we did the last time we launched an attack"
ROYLATHAM: "Im against rising up against Juggle because that would make us a union, which goes against my political beliefs"
IZBO10: "I have shown great restraint in the face of unrelenting stupidity, but your idea is so goddamn stupid-"

AIRMAX: "Enough" he said, raising a hand and quieting all the protesters. "There is actually a means of defeating Juggle if we decide to attack."

A hush fell over the group as everyone listened to Airmax's every word.

AIRMAX: "Many students are aware of Juggle's role in DDO's current state, and are willing to do whatever it takes to make DDO great again. We could recruit the students themselves to help us with the attack, help us storm the facility and defeat Juggle once and for all. The weapons we found that have 'remember the Alamo' etched in them for some reason would help us storm Juggle, along with weapons that kids bring to school every day..... Let us vote on attacking Juggle"

Everyone raised either a thumbs up or thumbs down. The total count came to 23 in favor, and 22 opposed.

AIRMAX: "Then it is settled. We attack on Monday... Is there any other business we must address before we prepare?"
INNOMEN: "Actually there is a new member I'd like to introduce"

Innomen motioned to the corner of the room and Larztheloser stepped forward, after having spent the majority of the meeting in the shadows.

INNOMEN: "Larz left the school because he got a better job as a principal elsewhere, but he decided to rejoin us after the other school sucked."

LARZ: "Juggle also played a role in killing it by not transferring students to the school, so I wanna do anything I can to thwart him and help you guys beat him.

Airmax nodded. "Thank you for joining us, and welcome..... To the DDO Elite"
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
imabench
Posts: 21,206
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5/21/2016 7:22:31 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
10 - The DDO Elite

Monday morning progressed as the sun steadily climbed into the sky. The DDO Elite had sent out emails to students informing them of the plot and the need for volunteers to storm Juggle. Many students volunteered, but not all of them. It was still going to eb a tough fight to take down Juggle.

Together, There were about 300 DDO Elite and DDO students armed and ready to fight, standing side by side as brothers in arms to take the fight to Juggle once the signal was given. They were all tired and p*ssed off at having to get up so early, and they were ready to make Juggle pay for it.

Across the street, the Texas Department of Education stood before them. NRA flags flew proudly from every flagpole of the building, members of the Texas national guard patrolled the walls, and a mural of Obama being called a racist and derogatory remark was spray-painted on the main entrance.

Airmax, on horseback, rode out in front of his companions looking to rally them for what was going to rally his troops

AIRMAX: "Every Week, I have led DDO through hell itself..... Every day, I have fought to keep Juggle from destroying DDO.... And every minute, I have dreamt of the day where we finally take the fight to him!"

He paused and pulled a Green-Bay Packers custom designed sword from its sheath, pointing it at the building across the street.

AIRMAX: "Somewhere in the halls of that wretched building is where Juggle is sitting on his fat a**, plotting some other way to kill DDO forever!.... For too long we have put up with Juggle!.... For too long has DDO languished due to Juggle's incompetence!... Well today we will NOT STAND FOR IT ANYMORE!.... WE'RE NOT GOING TO LET JUGGLE KILL DDO!..... WE WILL NOT GO QUIETLY INTO THE NIGHT, WE WILL NOT VANISH WITHOUT A FIGHT!..... WE'RE GOING TO LIVE ON!.....WE'RE GOING TO SURVIVE!..... TODAY, WE CELEBRATE, OUR INDEPENDENCE DAY!"

Airmax paused as the crowd roared.

AIRMAX: "NOW LETS GO F*CK UP JUGGLE!!!"

And with that, the fight was on.

===========================================================================

Airmax charged towards the building, every person of the DDO Elite and DDO itself charging behind, screaming at the top of their lungs. The National Guard patrols opened fire, but the guards were facing the sun as Airmax had planned, making it harder for them to aim.

DDO students fired back, shooting with pinpoint accuracy thanks to years and years of training in stopping school-shootings. Soldiers fell off the walls left and right, and students tea-bagged the bodies while they attacked the walls.

Ladders were raised along the walls as students climbed up, fueled by anger at being up so early for school, by Airmax's speech, and by the lunch lady's meth. Guards from further inside the complex though began picking off the students one by one as they overtook the wall, a bottleneck ensued as students got stuck trying to get over the walls. Zaradi went down first, then Koopin did after him, followed by Esocial and Endarkened, who died in each others arms.

AIRMAX: "We need to blast open the main gate!"

Mirza stepped up to the plate, throwing open his turban revealing explosives tied around his chest.

MIRZA: "ALLAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!"

Sprinting towards the doors, Mirza pushed the button on his trigger and blew open the doors to the complex, killing a few students in the process, but getting the job done. Students roared in glee as they charged full speed into the complex, storming the actual building to get Juggle. The walls may have been breached, but the fight was going to get even more brutal as DDO stormed the inside of the building because now the defenders were aware of the attack, and planned accordingly.

Thett3 broke through first and was cut down quickly, Donald.Keller charged in after and was gunned down as well. DDOians could barely get 4 feet into the main building without dying, a mountain of bodies quickly began to pile up. Airmax saw the carnage inside and turned to Innomen.

AIRMAX: "We're losing too many men!"
INNOMEN: "Im calling in air support!"

He pulled out a radio and began yelling coordinates.

INNOMEN: "ARIEL, ELSA, ANNA, BELLE, OLAF. DO YOU COPY?"
IMABENCH: "AFFIRMATIVE!!!"

High in the sky, Imabench led a fleet of WWII bombers overhead, all armed with explosives and dank weed. After receiving the order from Innomen, Ima relayed the order to all the other bombers to open the cargo bay doors. Bombs began to pepper the city of Dallas 3 miles below

None of the bombs hit anything even near where the fight was going down, but it was still really cool.

AIRMAX: "Now what?"
INNOMEN: "Lets go through the windows instead of the door!"
AIRMAX: "Okay sure!"

Airmax directed all the students to barge through windows rather than the front door. Chaos quickly ensued. None of the students knew who Juggle actually looked like, so many of them simply started to savagely murder every office worker they could find hoping it happened to be the right guy.... Others started pulling a Deadpool and demanded to know where to find Juggle from other employees before killing them anyways.

Airmax knew exactly what Juggle looked like though, so he charged through one of the windows to find him, gripping a bowie knife in one hand and his Green-Bay Packers themed sword in the other. He also knew that Juggle had a corner office, so he quickly darted around the building checking only the corner offices looking for Juggle. Like some sort of ninja, Airmax cut down any guard who got in his way. He slashed one throat, beheaded another guy, he even chucked a guy out of a window. After checking all the corner offices, Airmax quickly made his way upstairs, eventually hitting the 5th floor.

Meanwhile, the bombs falling on Dallas made the citizens of the city think Obama was invading them, so they all grabbed their own guns and headed right to the National Armory to get even more guns, which was right where the Department of Education happened to be.... Within minutes, the handful of DDO students still fighting were overjoyed at getting a tsunami of reinforcements storm the building, as the Texans mistook the siege as a sign that Obama was trying to take their guns to. Texans quickly began shooting every guard they could see while handing as many spare guns they could find to the students to keep shooting at other people.

Because, Texas.

Airmax then found Juggle's corner office on the fifth floor after an exhaustive search and barged into the room. Juggle was hiding under his desk, cowering in a puddle of his own fear and urine. He saw Airmax come in and got out from under his desk, begging for his life

JUGGLE: "Please! Im sorry! I'll do anything!"
AIRMAX: "Ive been waiting for this moment for a long time"
JUGGLE: "Please! Ill do whatever you want! Just have mercy!"
AIRMAX: "Sorry mate, Your a** is about to get got PERM-BANNED"

Airmax, with as much force as he could muster, kicked Juggle out of the window 300 style, where he fell 5 stories down onto the ground below, breaking his spine before being trampled by an armada of confused invading Texans worried Obama was here for their guns.

Juggle was finally vanquished. DDO could now operate in peace.

The End.
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
imabench
Posts: 21,206
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5/21/2016 7:34:01 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
At 5/21/2016 7:29:34 AM, SolonKR wrote:
You're fired.

<3
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
missbailey8
Posts: 1,881
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5/21/2016 7:37:59 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
This is so bootiful. :'(
~missbailey8~

Me: What is the weirdest thing I have ever done?
Solon: Agreeing to date me.

Skep: Bailey, you have sardonic written all over your face.
Annie: She has gorgeous written all over her face!

"[M]en are weak. All of us are weak."
-Fatihah

If you ever just want someone to vent, rant, or discuss anything troubling you, my PMs are always open. Have a fabulous day!

The Clown Queen of DDO
Rosalie
Posts: 4,605
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5/21/2016 7:39:38 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
This defineatly made my night. Lmao.
" We need more videos of cat's playing the piano on the internet" - My art professor.

"Criticism is easier to take when you realize that the only people who aren't criticized are those who don't take risks." - Donald Trump

Officially Mrs. 16Kadams 8-30-16
SamStevens
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5/21/2016 7:53:15 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
What a thumping good read :D
"This is the true horror of religion. It allows perfectly decent and sane people to believe by the billions, what only lunatics could believe on their own." Sam Harris
Life asked Death "Why do people love me but hate you?"
Death responded: "Because you are a beautiful lie, and I am the painful truth."
missbailey8
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5/21/2016 7:57:58 AM
Posted: 6 months ago
At 5/21/2016 7:53:15 AM, SamStevens wrote:
What a thumping good read :D
I know, right?
~missbailey8~

Me: What is the weirdest thing I have ever done?
Solon: Agreeing to date me.

Skep: Bailey, you have sardonic written all over your face.
Annie: She has gorgeous written all over her face!

"[M]en are weak. All of us are weak."
-Fatihah

If you ever just want someone to vent, rant, or discuss anything troubling you, my PMs are always open. Have a fabulous day!

The Clown Queen of DDO
lannan13
Posts: 23,022
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5/21/2016 1:35:10 PM
Posted: 6 months ago
That was awesome and reading this was a great way to start the day. I'm tempted to sig YYW calling me his hero.
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-Lannan13'S SIGNATURE-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-

If the sky's the limit then why do we have footprints on the Moon? I'm shooting my aspirations for the stars.

"If you are going through hell, keep going." "Sir Winston Churchill

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." "Eleanor Roosevelt

Topics I want to debate. (http://tinyurl.com...)
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Hayd
Posts: 4,022
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5/21/2016 2:38:16 PM
Posted: 6 months ago
Damn, straight fire imabench, good job. This was awesome. Although I was sad to see the YYW-bsh1 storyline thing never get resolved. My favorite part was Mirza shicide bombing the wall. Mirza was the best character, then the lunch lady, and then whiteflame
imabench
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5/21/2016 4:55:25 PM
Posted: 6 months ago
At 5/21/2016 2:38:16 PM, Hayd wrote:
Damn, straight fire imabench, good job. This was awesome. Although I was sad to see the YYW-bsh1 storyline thing never get resolved.

yeah sorry about that, the bug downside to One-Shots is that sometimes a storyline wont get fully resolved in the space allotted for it.... Its hard to make a decent storyline with interesting characters in 8000 characters to begin with, let alone resolve it by the end of the same post :P

My favorite part was Mirza suicide bombing the wall. Mirza was the best character, then the lunch lady, and then Whiteflame

And thats the strength of one shots, everyone gets their own time in the spotlight rather than the same two or three people over and over again.
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
PetersSmith
Posts: 5,819
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5/21/2016 4:58:10 PM
Posted: 6 months ago
It's nice people are trying to start fanfictions again.
Empress of DDO (also Poll and Forum "Maintenance" Moderator)

"The two most important days in your life is the day you were born, and the day you find out why."
~Mark Twain

"Wow"
-Doge

"Don't believe everything you read on the internet just because there's a picture with a quote next to it."
~Abraham Lincoln

Guide to the Polls Section: http://www.debate.org...
imabench
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5/21/2016 5:00:27 PM
Posted: 6 months ago
At 5/21/2016 4:58:10 PM, PetersSmith wrote:
It's nice people are trying to start *One Shots*.

Fixed <3
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
PetersSmith
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5/21/2016 5:02:31 PM
Posted: 6 months ago
At 5/21/2016 5:00:27 PM, imabench wrote:
At 5/21/2016 4:58:10 PM, PetersSmith wrote:
It's nice people are trying to start *One Shots*.

Fixed <3

Well, one shots technically count as fanfictions...and if they don't then we point towards what Adam and Donald are doing ("So me and Donald have decided to revive the fanfic forums").
Empress of DDO (also Poll and Forum "Maintenance" Moderator)

"The two most important days in your life is the day you were born, and the day you find out why."
~Mark Twain

"Wow"
-Doge

"Don't believe everything you read on the internet just because there's a picture with a quote next to it."
~Abraham Lincoln

Guide to the Polls Section: http://www.debate.org...
imabench
Posts: 21,206
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5/21/2016 5:07:41 PM
Posted: 6 months ago
At 5/21/2016 5:02:31 PM, PetersSmith wrote:
At 5/21/2016 5:00:27 PM, imabench wrote:
At 5/21/2016 4:58:10 PM, PetersSmith wrote:
It's nice people are trying to start *One Shots*.

Fixed <3

Well, one shots technically count as fanfictions...

Theyre more like relatives of fanfictions since you only have to make one for it to be a one shot. Then when you have a collection of one shots set in almost the same setting, it begins to resemble a fanfiction

and if they don't then we point towards what Adam and Donald are doing ("So me and Donald have decided to revive the fanfic forums").

Good luck to them :P
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

DDO: THE MOVIE = http://www.debate.org...
http://www.debate.org...

VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
PetersSmith
Posts: 5,819
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5/21/2016 5:28:15 PM
Posted: 6 months ago
At 5/21/2016 5:07:41 PM, imabench wrote:
At 5/21/2016 5:02:31 PM, PetersSmith wrote:
At 5/21/2016 5:00:27 PM, imabench wrote:
At 5/21/2016 4:58:10 PM, PetersSmith wrote:
It's nice people are trying to start *One Shots*.

Fixed <3

Well, one shots technically count as fanfictions...

Theyre more like relatives of fanfictions since you only have to make one for it to be a one shot. Then when you have a collection of one shots set in almost the same setting, it begins to resemble a fanfiction

and if they don't then we point towards what Adam and Donald are doing ("So me and Donald have decided to revive the fanfic forums").

Good luck to them :P

You should do a DDO Pirates of the Caribbean.
Empress of DDO (also Poll and Forum "Maintenance" Moderator)

"The two most important days in your life is the day you were born, and the day you find out why."
~Mark Twain

"Wow"
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"Don't believe everything you read on the internet just because there's a picture with a quote next to it."
~Abraham Lincoln

Guide to the Polls Section: http://www.debate.org...
imabench
Posts: 21,206
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5/21/2016 5:29:33 PM
Posted: 6 months ago
At 5/21/2016 5:28:15 PM, PetersSmith wrote:
At 5/21/2016 5:07:41 PM, imabench wrote:
At 5/21/2016 5:02:31 PM, PetersSmith wrote:
At 5/21/2016 5:00:27 PM, imabench wrote:
At 5/21/2016 4:58:10 PM, PetersSmith wrote:
It's nice people are trying to start *One Shots*.

Fixed <3

Well, one shots technically count as fanfictions...

Theyre more like relatives of fanfictions since you only have to make one for it to be a one shot. Then when you have a collection of one shots set in almost the same setting, it begins to resemble a fanfiction

and if they don't then we point towards what Adam and Donald are doing ("So me and Donald have decided to revive the fanfic forums").

Good luck to them :P

You should do a DDO Pirates of the Caribbean.

I tried in the past but i got temp banned after the first episode and didnt have it in me to go back to it XD
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

7/14/16 = The Presidency Dies

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VP of DDO from Dec 14th 2014 to Jan 1st 2015
PetersSmith
Posts: 5,819
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5/21/2016 5:30:29 PM
Posted: 6 months ago
At 5/21/2016 5:29:33 PM, imabench wrote:
At 5/21/2016 5:28:15 PM, PetersSmith wrote:
At 5/21/2016 5:07:41 PM, imabench wrote:
At 5/21/2016 5:02:31 PM, PetersSmith wrote:
At 5/21/2016 5:00:27 PM, imabench wrote:
At 5/21/2016 4:58:10 PM, PetersSmith wrote:
It's nice people are trying to start *One Shots*.

Fixed <3

Well, one shots technically count as fanfictions...

Theyre more like relatives of fanfictions since you only have to make one for it to be a one shot. Then when you have a collection of one shots set in almost the same setting, it begins to resemble a fanfiction

and if they don't then we point towards what Adam and Donald are doing ("So me and Donald have decided to revive the fanfic forums").

Good luck to them :P

You should do a DDO Pirates of the Caribbean.

I tried in the past but i got temp banned after the first episode and didnt have it in me to go back to it XD

You should make a DDO the Happening except instead of trees making you kill yourself it's the religion forum.
Empress of DDO (also Poll and Forum "Maintenance" Moderator)

"The two most important days in your life is the day you were born, and the day you find out why."
~Mark Twain

"Wow"
-Doge

"Don't believe everything you read on the internet just because there's a picture with a quote next to it."
~Abraham Lincoln

Guide to the Polls Section: http://www.debate.org...
Sapphique
Posts: 4,110
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5/21/2016 6:17:28 PM
Posted: 6 months ago
At 5/21/2016 7:53:15 AM, SamStevens wrote:
What a thumping good read :D
DDO Beginners' Mafia Moderator -- PM me if you'd like to learn how to play mafia!

"We wondered what happiness would look like if we could give it a physical form...the shape of happiness might resemble glass...even though you don't usually notice it, it's still definitely there. You merely have to change your point of view slightly, and then that glass will sparkle when it reflects the light. I doubt that anything else could argue its own existence more eloquently." ~Lelouch
ESocialBookworm
Posts: 14,355
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5/21/2016 7:08:13 PM
Posted: 6 months ago
ctrl + f "esocial"

I shall read this tonight.
Solonkr~
I don't care about whether an ideology is "necessary" or not,
I care about how to solve problems,
which is what everyone else should also care about.

Ken~
In essence, the world is fucked up and you can either ignore it, become cynical or bitter about it.

Me~
"BAILEY + SOLON = SAILEY
MY SHIP SAILEY MUST SAIL"

SCREW THAT SHIZ #BANNIE = BAILEY & ANNIE

P.S. Shipped Sailey before it was cannon bitches.