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The DDO Weekly Standard, Issue I

YYW
Posts: 36,242
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7/4/2016 5:45:28 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
HEADLINE READS: "SNOWFLAKES OPPOSE FREEDOM!"

Milwaukee, WI - A new resolution was proposed in the DDO house of commons today by Comrade Bench, which entertained the possibility of a "purge," similar to and perhaps inspired by a movie bearing the same name. The proposal emanated from previous backroom discussions that had taken place among the DDO Elite, who populate the hangouts.

A confidential source, off the record, suggested Chairman Max's amenability to the idea. The Standard has learned from an unnamed high ranking Politburo Official that "[m]embers within the Politburo have been quietly discussing [the purge] for months, but we have had to wait until the timing was appropriate. We know that because of how slow the Chairman makes decisions, and how unwilling he is to relinquish control of any kind, it was necessary to delay bringing this to his attention until after a very public spectacle where his legitimacy was seriously called into question." However, the Chairman's characteristic reticence has caused much speculation as to his true feelings on the matter.

Strong opposition from The Snowflakes (a vanguard faction within the DDO Communist Party who oppose freedom or free expression of any kind) immediately followed the public announcement. Through back channels, the current head of the NKVD and "President of the Site" sent his stooge to publicly oppose the proposal with the predictable party line. Though not officially, one Snowflake neurotically decried that such a purge would cause great harm, including "hurt fee fees" and other kinds of woe. One Snowflake even suggested that he would "leave the site" if such a purge was allowed.

Predictably, the Snowflakes and their feigned concerns were dismissed entirely by the Supreme Soviet Majority and Badger Party Leader, Wylted, who has made a career manipulating and trolling the Snowflake party head and current "president of the site"/NKVD leader. Wylted characterized the Snowflake's concerns as "complete garbage not even worth acknowledgement," and continued that "the only reason the Snowflakes oppose the Purge is because they know that they will be the ones purged."

Wylted continued to elaborate: "The Snowflakes have held, barely, a majority in the Soviet only because their leader was elected after the Communist party's former president had a psychotic breakdown and was forced to resign in disgrace. After multiple failed presidencies came and passed, DDO was willing to settle, even for a Snowflake... but he never had the site's real support. He just had the appearance of support, which I know because I almost took his job."

When asked why he was not running for President in the coming election, Wylted suggested that he may be planning to stage a coup, because the "establishment" candidate, though not a snowflake, shares much in common with the snowflakes. "The Badger Party has always opposed the Politburo's control on free speech, and the Snowflake Party's perverse imposition of 'political correctness' on the site. It's disgusting, and perverse."

The Snowflakes, when contacted, refused to comment, citing political correctness concerns. The Snowflake party spokesman added that the Standard is under investigation by the politburo. Wylted, when informed of this, suggested that when the Badgers return to power, the Snowflakes will not only be purged, but sent to Siberian Gulags.
MrVindication
Posts: 86
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7/4/2016 5:50:35 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 7/4/2016 5:45:28 PM, YYW wrote:
HEADLINE READS: "SNOWFLAKES OPPOSE FREEDOM!"

Milwaukee, WI - A new resolution was proposed in the DDO house of commons today by Comrade Bench, which entertained the possibility of a "purge," similar to and perhaps inspired by a movie bearing the same name. The proposal emanated from previous backroom discussions that had taken place among the DDO Elite, who populate the hangouts.

A confidential source, off the record, suggested Chairman Max's amenability to the idea. The Standard has learned from an unnamed high ranking Politburo Official that "[m]embers within the Politburo have been quietly discussing [the purge] for months, but we have had to wait until the timing was appropriate. We know that because of how slow the Chairman makes decisions, and how unwilling he is to relinquish control of any kind, it was necessary to delay bringing this to his attention until after a very public spectacle where his legitimacy was seriously called into question." However, the Chairman's characteristic reticence has caused much speculation as to his true feelings on the matter.

Strong opposition from The Snowflakes (a vanguard faction within the DDO Communist Party who oppose freedom or free expression of any kind) immediately followed the public announcement. Through back channels, the current head of the NKVD and "President of the Site" sent his stooge to publicly oppose the proposal with the predictable party line. Though not officially, one Snowflake neurotically decried that such a purge would cause great harm, including "hurt fee fees" and other kinds of woe. One Snowflake even suggested that he would "leave the site" if such a purge was allowed.

Predictably, the Snowflakes and their feigned concerns were dismissed entirely by the Supreme Soviet Majority and Badger Party Leader, Wylted, who has made a career manipulating and trolling the Snowflake party head and current "president of the site"/NKVD leader. Wylted characterized the Snowflake's concerns as "complete garbage not even worth acknowledgement," and continued that "the only reason the Snowflakes oppose the Purge is because they know that they will be the ones purged."

Wylted continued to elaborate: "The Snowflakes have held, barely, a majority in the Soviet only because their leader was elected after the Communist party's former president had a psychotic breakdown and was forced to resign in disgrace. After multiple failed presidencies came and passed, DDO was willing to settle, even for a Snowflake... but he never had the site's real support. He just had the appearance of support, which I know because I almost took his job."

When asked why he was not running for President in the coming election, Wylted suggested that he may be planning to stage a coup, because the "establishment" candidate, though not a snowflake, shares much in common with the snowflakes. "The Badger Party has always opposed the Politburo's control on free speech, and the Snowflake Party's perverse imposition of 'political correctness' on the site. It's disgusting, and perverse."

The Snowflakes, when contacted, refused to comment, citing political correctness concerns. The Snowflake party spokesman added that the Standard is under investigation by the politburo. Wylted, when informed of this, suggested that when the Badgers return to power, the Snowflakes will not only be purged, but sent to Siberian Gulags.

To the Gulags
imabench
Posts: 21,205
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7/4/2016 6:35:56 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 7/4/2016 5:45:28 PM, YYW wrote:

One Snowflake even suggested that he would "leave the site" if such a purge was allowed.

Who was it? I might be able to use that statement to hype up the purge further if it was said by an irrelevent member nobody liked in the first place
Kevin24018 : "He's just so mean it makes me want to ball up my fists and stamp on the ground"

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PetersSmith
Posts: 5,811
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7/4/2016 6:41:11 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
Snowflakes are pretty https://theblogofbaphomet.files.wordpress.com...
Empress of DDO (also Poll and Forum "Maintenance" Moderator)

"The two most important days in your life is the day you were born, and the day you find out why."
~Mark Twain

"Wow"
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"Don't believe everything you read on the internet just because there's a picture with a quote next to it."
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YYW
Posts: 36,242
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7/4/2016 6:45:36 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 7/4/2016 6:35:56 PM, imabench wrote:
At 7/4/2016 5:45:28 PM, YYW wrote:

One Snowflake even suggested that he would "leave the site" if such a purge was allowed.

Who was it? I might be able to use that statement to hype up the purge further if it was said by an irrelevent member nobody liked in the first place

The Standard is currently under investigation for political crimes, and therefore declined to comment further.
PetersSmith
Posts: 5,811
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7/4/2016 7:05:57 PM
Posted: 5 months ago
At 7/4/2016 6:42:38 PM, YYW wrote:
At 7/4/2016 6:41:11 PM, PetersSmith wrote:
Snowflakes are pretty https://theblogofbaphomet.files.wordpress.com...

This is anti-Semitic.

I won't deny that.
Empress of DDO (also Poll and Forum "Maintenance" Moderator)

"The two most important days in your life is the day you were born, and the day you find out why."
~Mark Twain

"Wow"
-Doge

"Don't believe everything you read on the internet just because there's a picture with a quote next to it."
~Abraham Lincoln

Guide to the Polls Section: http://www.debate.org...