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Thee Santa Question

Wallstreetatheist
Posts: 7,132
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4/26/2012 10:30:01 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
Okay, this has been bothering me for a while.
How does Santa provide presents to every good child in the world, but receive no revenue from the activity? He uses many different materials which are mined, grown, and produced in other parts of the world, yet has no savings with which to purchase the goods; even if he decided to get a loan, what respectable banker would provide a loan to a business plan that says, "We'll give toys to everyone for free?" This plan would only work if Santa had his own national North Pole currency with which he would persuade people to use as the world reserve currency, then he could inflate the currency by printing North Pole bills and exporting them for goods in return. Or, if Santa was heavily subsidized by the Finnish government, and was provided with guaranteed loans with the possibility of perpetual default. Or, he could pool investors money in the business, and then when they want their money out in troubling economic times, he just asks more investors to put money in, then more, forever; it's flawless. But this leads me to an inevitable conclusion: either Santa is a demigod or he's a socialist. Either way, my childhood was a charade.
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Wallstreetatheist
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4/26/2012 10:44:01 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 4/26/2012 10:31:04 PM, Koopin wrote:
Magic

Speaking of magic, how are your brethren raised so quickly for the slaughter in factory farms?
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Koopin
Posts: 12,090
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4/26/2012 11:06:53 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 4/26/2012 10:44:01 PM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:
At 4/26/2012 10:31:04 PM, Koopin wrote:
Magic

Speaking of magic, how are your brethren raised so quickly for the slaughter in factory farms?

Wishywash propaganda for mindless vegitarians. The FDA will shutdown steriod farms quicker than a premature jacker in a whore house. Chickens grow at such a rapid rate in factory farms becuase of special breeding.
kfc
Wallstreetatheist
Posts: 7,132
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4/26/2012 11:10:26 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 4/26/2012 11:06:53 PM, Koopin wrote:
At 4/26/2012 10:44:01 PM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:

Speaking of magic, how are your brethren raised so quickly for the slaughter in : : factory farms?

Magic :D

I knew it!!!
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Cermank
Posts: 3,773
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4/27/2012 12:01:13 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 4/26/2012 10:30:01 PM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:
Okay, this has been bothering me for a while.
How does Santa provide presents to every good child in the world, but receive no revenue from the activity? He uses many different materials which are mined, grown, and produced in other parts of the world, yet has no savings with which to purchase the goods; even if he decided to get a loan, what respectable banker would provide a loan to a business plan that says, "We'll give toys to everyone for free?" This plan would only work if Santa had his own national North Pole currency with which he would persuade people to use as the world reserve currency, then he could inflate the currency by printing North Pole bills and exporting them for goods in return. Or, if Santa was heavily subsidized by the Finnish government, and was provided with guaranteed loans with the possibility of perpetual default. Or, he could pool investors money in the business, and then when they want their money out in troubling economic times, he just asks more investors to put money in, then more, forever; it's flawless. But this leads me to an inevitable conclusion: either Santa is a demigod or he's a socialist. Either way, my childhood was a charade.

How do you come to that conclusion?

And what do you mean he doesn't get any revenue for the toys? He get's our love! That's pretty much the most valuable thing there is :P
Wallstreetatheist
Posts: 7,132
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4/27/2012 12:19:10 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 4/27/2012 12:01:13 AM, Cermank wrote:

How do you come to that conclusion?
And what do you mean he doesn't get any revenue for the toys? He get's our love! : That's pretty much the most valuable thing there is :P

You can't trade love for iron ore. Santa's a socialist because he's relying on a socialist government, he created a central bank, and uses corporatist leverage to gain price controls to guarantee loans to himself.

HE MUST BE EXECUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WANT SANTA'S BLOOD!!!
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Cermank
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4/27/2012 12:26:15 AM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 4/27/2012 12:19:10 AM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:
At 4/27/2012 12:01:13 AM, Cermank wrote:

How do you come to that conclusion?
And what do you mean he doesn't get any revenue for the toys? He get's our love! : That's pretty much the most valuable thing there is :P

You can't trade love for iron ore.

This makes me very sad, wallstreet.

Santa's a socialist because he's relying on a socialist government, he created a central bank, and uses corporatist leverage to gain price controls to guarantee loans to himself.

But Santa IS the government.

HE MUST BE EXECUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WANT SANTA'S BLOOD!!!

But... he's good. He gave me dairy milk. Your argument is invalid.
Wallstreetatheist
Posts: 7,132
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4/27/2012 3:19:03 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
I have corrected my position.

Santa was born sometime in the first century AD. He started with a small amount of money which he invested wisely. Later, when the Church grew in power, he got even more and continued to invest all of it. By the 15th Century, he had amassed enough money to get gifts for every child while at the same time leaving enough to more than replenish his account.

So Santa is not a demigod (despite the living for 2000 years) nor is he a socialist. He is just a very frugal, very long-term investing philanthropist.
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thett3
Posts: 14,334
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4/27/2012 6:11:55 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
Never lose faith!
DDO Vice President

#StandwithBossy

#UnbanTheMadman

#BetOnThett

"Don't quote me, ever." -Max

"My name is max. I'm not a big fan of slacks"- Max rapping

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"You fit the character of Regina George quite nicely"- Sam

: At 11/12/2016 11:49:40 PM, Raisor wrote:
: thett was right
Wallstreetatheist
Posts: 7,132
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4/28/2012 1:01:45 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 4/27/2012 12:26:15 AM, Cermank wrote:
At 4/27/2012 12:19:10 AM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:


You can't trade love for iron ore.

This makes me very sad, wallstreet.

Welcome to the real world, kid; it's tough. "You mean the streets aren't paved with marijuana?" Nope, no they're not. "You mean I can't purchase a sandwich with a song?" Nope, you cannot. "You can't elect a hackeysack mayor?" I'm sorry, but no.
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Stephen_Hawkins
Posts: 5,316
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4/28/2012 4:14:30 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
Santa has a very successful drug ring.
Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach him how to be Gay, he'll positively influence the GDP.

Social Contract Theory debate: http://www.debate.org...
OberHerr
Posts: 13,062
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4/28/2012 6:52:33 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
Prostitutes?
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Wallstreetatheist
Posts: 7,132
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4/29/2012 7:30:36 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
Conclusion
Jesus is an immortal Godfather who invests money into drug rings, prostitution, and gambling to be the benevolent toy-giver he is today.
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OberHerr
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4/29/2012 7:31:39 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
At 4/29/2012 7:30:36 PM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:
Conclusion
Jesus is an immortal Godfather who invests money into drug rings, prostitution, and gambling to be the benevolent toy-giver he is today.

And, Jesus came into this.....because?
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Wallstreetatheist
Posts: 7,132
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4/29/2012 8:09:37 PM
Posted: 4 years ago
lmao, I meant Santa. How did that happen?? lol

Conclusion
Santa is an immortal Godfather who invests money into drug rings, prostitution, and gambling to be the benevolent toy-giver he is today.

FIXED
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