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Stuff That Doesn't Make Sense

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6/4/2013 1:15:39 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
Why does lemonade have imitation flavoring, but furniture polish contains real lemon juice?
Why do we park in driveways, and drive on parkways?
Why is it that when I transport something by car it's called a shipment, but when I transport something by ship it's called cargo?
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?
Why are wise men and wise guys opposites?
Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked and dry cleaners depressed?
Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe them, but if they tell you a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?
Why do "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?
Why did Japanese Kamikaze pilots wear crash helmets.
Why is there no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
Why are sweetmeats candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
Why do people recite at a play and play at a recital?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same?
How can overlook and oversee be opposites, while quite a lot and quite a few are alike?
How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?
Have you ever run into someone who was combobulated, gruntled, ruly or peccable?
Does it make any sense that you fill in a form by filling it out?
Why do your feet smell and your nose runs?
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
Why is it called a TV "set" when you only get one of them?
Why is that when you are driving and looking for an address you turn the radio down?
If a convenience store is open 24hrs a day 365 days a year, why are there looks on the door?
Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited?
How does the man who drives the snow plow get to work?
Why is it so hard to remember how to spell mnemonic?
Why is it called quicksand if it takes you down slowly?
Why are boxing rings are square?
Why do they sterilize needles used for lethal injections?
Why do celebrities spend their entire lives trying to become well-known, and then wear dark glasses so no one will recognize them?
Why do people ask you, "Can I ask you a question?" It's not like you have a choice, they already did.
If something is top secret, why would you write "confidential" on the envelope? Wouldn't it make people want to open it, as opposed to a plain old manila envelope with nothing on it?
What's the point of thongs? It's like buying a wedgie.
What's a free gift? Aren't all gifts free?
Why is it that snowfalls, but raindrops?
Why do people make rubber duckies yellow, when real ducks are green, or brown? It's kind of dumb.
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
If you can't drink and drive, why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor?
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
Why does an alarm clock "go off" when it begins ringing?
Why is it called a "building" when it is already built?
Why is there an expiration date on "sour" cream?
Shouldn't there be a shorter word for "monosyllabic?"
Why is the word "abbreviate" so long?
Why do "tug" boats push their barges?
Why do we sing "take me out to the ball game", when we are already there?
Why is there only one Monopolies Commission?
Why is it when two planes almost hit each other it is called a "near miss?" Shouldn't it be called a "near hit?"
Why do light switches say on/off? When it's on you can see it's on, when it's off you can't see to read.
If "con" is the opposite of "pro," is Congress the opposite of progress?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored catfood?
Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?"
If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
Isn't it a bit unnerving that what doctors and lawyers call what they do "practice?"
Why do people long for eternal life when they don't even know what to do on a rainy Saturday afternoon?
Why do we call this planet Earth when it is 90% water?

Obviously, English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which, of course, isn't a race at all).