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Chuck Norris Facts

yay842
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10/7/2013 7:31:32 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
I dedicate this topic to the best Chuck Norris Facts.
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yay842
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10/9/2013 7:02:55 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
Chuck Norris can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
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Disquisition
Posts: 391
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10/9/2013 7:14:01 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
When Chuck Norris' heart tried to attack him, it lost...

When Chuck Norris goes to sleep he leaves on a night light, not because he is afraid of the dark but because the dark is afraid of him
Jack212
Posts: 572
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10/10/2013 12:57:46 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
Who would win in Chuck Norris vs. Thor?

Next time Chuck Norris and Chris Hemsworth are in the same room, we should get them to settle the matter by arm wrestling.
TheAntidoter
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10/10/2013 3:00:20 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
Chuck norris can slam a revolving door.
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Nac.

WOAH, COLORED FONT!
TheAntidoter
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10/11/2013 10:57:37 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
If you can see Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris can see you.

If you can't see Chuck Norris, Death may be only a few seconds away.
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Nac.

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thedebatekid
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10/11/2013 11:16:56 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
A man was walking along the sidewalk when he accidentally bumped into Chuck Norris. Upon seeing who he ran into the man then decided to pour gasoline on himself and set himself on fire. He knew this would be a less painful way to die than getting roundhouse kicked by Chuck. Chuck roundhouse kicked him either way.
How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of the tootsie pop? 1, 2, 3, *crunch* SON OF A !@#%!@#$!@$%$^^$$#%!!!

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yay842
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10/12/2013 1:56:20 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
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yay842
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10/12/2013 1:56:59 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he doesn't lift himself up; he pushes the Earth down.
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TheAntidoter
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10/26/2013 3:51:04 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
Chuck Norris's tears can cure cancer.

Too bad he never cries.
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PatriotPerson
Posts: 1,062
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10/27/2013 6:26:50 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
Carlos Ray "Chuck" Norris is an American martial artist and actor. He was born March 10, 1940 in Ryan, Oklahoma. He is currently 73 years old and stands at five feet ten inches.
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PatriotPerson
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10/27/2013 6:45:45 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 10/27/2013 6:28:39 PM, Ore_Ele wrote:
Chuck Norris was killed by Bruce Lee.

And Liam Neeson, and Clint Eastwood...

There really are tougher people than Norris.
"Victory has a thousand fathers, but defeat is an orphan" -JFK
"You all stink like poo poo" - Rich Davis
"That idea may just be crazy enough... TO GET US ALL KILLED!" -Squidward Tentacles
"My heart is always breaking for the ghosts that haunt this room." -Nate Ruess
NightofTheLivingCats
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10/29/2013 7:55:36 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
When Alexander Grand Bell invented the telephone, he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris.

Some magicans can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land.

Chuck Norris can cut through a hot knife with butter

Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.

Chuck Norris knows what he did, tomorrow.

Chuck Norris killed 2 stones with 1 bird
yay842
Posts: 5,680
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10/30/2013 7:06:34 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
After Chuck Norris farted twice, Japan surrendered from WW2.
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Ragnar
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10/30/2013 10:54:48 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 10/27/2013 6:26:50 PM, PatriotPerson wrote:
Carlos Ray "Chuck" Norris is an American martial artist and actor. He was born March 10, 1940 in Ryan, Oklahoma. He is currently 73 years old and stands at five feet ten inches.

I call BS on this one.
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yay842
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12/4/2013 11:31:48 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
The boogeyman checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
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Name One Song That Can't Match This GIF
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TheAntidoter
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12/11/2013 9:33:43 AM
Posted: 2 years ago
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door while strangling you with a cordless phone.
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Nac.

WOAH, COLORED FONT!
yay842
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12/14/2013 9:17:29 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
Chuck Norris doesn't get heart attacks, his hear is too foolish to attack him.
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Name One Song That Can't Match This GIF
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dtaylor971
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12/15/2013 12:23:38 AM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 12/14/2013 9:17:29 PM, yay842 wrote:
Chuck Norris doesn't get heart attacks, his hear is too foolish to attack him.

Chuck Norris doesn't get cancer.
Cancer gets Chuck Norris.

Once a mosquito bit Chuck Norris.
The mosquito died from malaria two hours after.

The monster checks for Chuck Norris under his bed.

Chuck Norris created God.

Chuck Norris once gave AIDS cancer.
"I don't know why gays want to marry, I have spent the last 25 years wishing I wasn't allowed to." -Sadolite
TorqueDork
Posts: 14
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12/15/2013 7:53:20 AM
Posted: 2 years ago
Mosquito's don't bite Chuck Norris out of respect.

Fear of spiders is arachnophobia, fear of tight spaces is claustrophobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic.

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
yay842
Posts: 5,680
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12/15/2013 2:11:30 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
Chuck Norris can fall up and jump down.
30 Important Life Lessons
http://www.debate.org...
20 Terrifying Two-Sentence Horrors
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20 Jokes That Only Geniuses Will Understand
http://www.debate.org...
Name One Song That Can't Match This GIF
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dtaylor971
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12/16/2013 12:28:56 AM
Posted: 2 years ago
Chuck Norris destroyed this joke.
"I don't know why gays want to marry, I have spent the last 25 years wishing I wasn't allowed to." -Sadolite