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Complete the story

breakingamber
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12/8/2015 2:14:04 AM
Posted: 12 months ago
At 12/5/2015 10:45:26 PM, Voxol wrote:
Once there was a man named Josh, who often peed in his pants because he had to go onstage a lot to perform a belly flop because his was so hilarious.
I like story tags!
MAY THE WRATH OF THE MODS BE UPON YOU!
- Master Elodin

"When will [Obliteration] learn that Funtimes' plan of saving/destroying the world with pancakes is the only way? "
"She wouldn't even have to make real pancakes! Just the batter, and Obliteration could cook it with his powers! OBLITERATION, YOU'RE WASTING YOUR TALENTS"
- Voidus and TwiLyghtSansSparkles

"An Epic stage magician and a zombie dinosaur? She sure as Braize won"t pull the line there!"
- Edgedancer
SM2
Posts: 546
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12/8/2015 10:03:51 PM
Posted: 12 months ago
Josh was so obnoxious, that nobody liked him. One day, he annoyed Carl so much that Carl shot him.

Chapter 2:

Carl went to prison...
Rosalie
Posts: 4,605
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12/8/2015 11:40:08 PM
Posted: 12 months ago
At 12/8/2015 10:03:51 PM, SM2 wrote:
Josh was so obnoxious, that nobody liked him. One day, he annoyed Carl so much that Carl shot him.

Chapter 2:

Carl went to prison...

And there he met the love of his life named Jim John.
" We need more videos of cat's playing the piano on the internet" - My art professor.

"Criticism is easier to take when you realize that the only people who aren't criticized are those who don't take risks." - Donald Trump

Officially Mrs. 16Kadams 8-30-16
SM2
Posts: 546
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12/8/2015 11:44:11 PM
Posted: 12 months ago
At 12/8/2015 11:40:08 PM, Rosalie wrote:
At 12/8/2015 10:03:51 PM, SM2 wrote:
Josh was so obnoxious, that nobody liked him. One day, he annoyed Carl so much that Carl shot him.

Chapter 2:

Carl went to prison...

And there he met the love of his life named Jim John.

Jim John showed Carl his dong...
Rosalie
Posts: 4,605
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12/8/2015 11:50:19 PM
Posted: 12 months ago
At 12/8/2015 11:44:11 PM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:40:08 PM, Rosalie wrote:
At 12/8/2015 10:03:51 PM, SM2 wrote:
Josh was so obnoxious, that nobody liked him. One day, he annoyed Carl so much that Carl shot him.

Chapter 2:

Carl went to prison...

And there he met the love of his life named Jim John.

Jim John showed Carl his dong...

Carl was fairly conservative. He broke up with Jim John after Carl had dropped the soap, and Jim John took advantage of Carl...
" We need more videos of cat's playing the piano on the internet" - My art professor.

"Criticism is easier to take when you realize that the only people who aren't criticized are those who don't take risks." - Donald Trump

Officially Mrs. 16Kadams 8-30-16
SM2
Posts: 546
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12/8/2015 11:52:34 PM
Posted: 12 months ago
At 12/8/2015 11:50:19 PM, Rosalie wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:44:11 PM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:40:08 PM, Rosalie wrote:
At 12/8/2015 10:03:51 PM, SM2 wrote:
Josh was so obnoxious, that nobody liked him. One day, he annoyed Carl so much that Carl shot him.

Chapter 2:

Carl went to prison...

And there he met the love of his life named Jim John.

Jim John showed Carl his dong...

Carl was fairly conservative. He broke up with Jim John after Carl had dropped the soap, and Jim John took advantage of Carl...

Jim John was heartbroken. In his anger, he took a shiv, and ambushed Carl in his cell...
Beginner
Posts: 4,292
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12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM
Posted: 12 months ago
At 12/8/2015 11:50:19 PM, Rosalie wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:44:11 PM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:40:08 PM, Rosalie wrote:
At 12/8/2015 10:03:51 PM, SM2 wrote:
Josh was so obnoxious, that nobody liked him. One day, he annoyed Carl so much that Carl shot him.

Chapter 2:

Carl went to prison...

And there he met the love of his life named Jim John.

Jim John showed Carl his dong...

Carl was fairly conservative. He broke up with Jim John after Carl had dropped the soap, and Jim John took advantage of Carl...

"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.
Senpai has noticed you.
SM2
Posts: 546
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12/9/2015 12:19:17 AM
Posted: 12 months ago
At 12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM, Beginner wrote:
"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.

Jim shook with rage. He gripped the shiv so tight that his knuckles hurt. "You broke my heart, Carl. So now, I'll break yours."
He lunged, jabbing the shiv between Carl's ribs. Carl cried out. Jim stabbed again, and again, and again. Alarms sounded in the distance, as the prison guards tackled Jim against the wall. Carl collapsed to the floor, bleeding out of every orifice, and gasped his final, bloody breath.
PetersSmith
Posts: 5,819
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12/9/2015 12:23:39 AM
Posted: 12 months ago
And then everyone died, the end!
Empress of DDO (also Poll and Forum "Maintenance" Moderator)

"The two most important days in your life is the day you were born, and the day you find out why."
~Mark Twain

"Wow"
-Doge

"Don't believe everything you read on the internet just because there's a picture with a quote next to it."
~Abraham Lincoln

Guide to the Polls Section: http://www.debate.org...
SM2
Posts: 546
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12/9/2015 12:26:25 AM
Posted: 12 months ago
At 12/9/2015 12:23:39 AM, PetersSmith wrote:
And then everyone died, the end!

And then God reset the timeline, so that everyone continued living instead.
Rosalie
Posts: 4,605
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12/9/2015 12:32:25 AM
Posted: 12 months ago
At 12/9/2015 12:26:25 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:23:39 AM, PetersSmith wrote:
And then everyone died, the end!

And then God reset the timeline, so that everyone continued living instead.

Then he made Rosalie, who should rule the world!!
" We need more videos of cat's playing the piano on the internet" - My art professor.

"Criticism is easier to take when you realize that the only people who aren't criticized are those who don't take risks." - Donald Trump

Officially Mrs. 16Kadams 8-30-16
SM2
Posts: 546
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12/9/2015 12:36:01 AM
Posted: 12 months ago
At 12/9/2015 12:32:25 AM, Rosalie wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:26:25 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:23:39 AM, PetersSmith wrote:
And then everyone died, the end!

And then God reset the timeline, so that everyone continued living instead.

Then he made Rosalie, who should rule the world!!

"But first," said God, "you must complete a task for me. There is a prison inmate named Jim John, who is destined to become the new king of Israel. You must ensure that he fulfills his destiny, and you must do so without revealing the existence of Heaven to anybody. If the paparazzi caught wind of my existence..." God shuddered.
Beginner
Posts: 4,292
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12/9/2015 12:55:20 AM
Posted: 12 months ago
At 12/9/2015 12:19:17 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM, Beginner wrote:
"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.

Jim shook with rage. He gripped the shiv so tight that his knuckles hurt. "You broke my heart, Carl. So now, I'll break yours."
He lunged, jabbing the shiv between Carl's ribs. Carl cried out. Jim stabbed again, and again, and again. Alarms sounded in the distance, as the prison guards tackled Jim against the wall. Carl collapsed to the floor, bleeding out of every orifice, and gasped his final, bloody breath.

The prison guards arrived and, upon seeing the knife-wielding Jim standing over the bloody body of the inmate known as Carl, knew instantly what had happened.
"Seize him!" Cried the lead guard.
Grinning manically, Jim twirled his knife around and slit the throat of the first sucker to reach him.
Senpai has noticed you.
SM2
Posts: 546
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12/9/2015 12:59:50 AM
Posted: 12 months ago
At 12/9/2015 12:55:20 AM, Beginner wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:19:17 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM, Beginner wrote:
"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.

Jim shook with rage. He gripped the shiv so tight that his knuckles hurt. "You broke my heart, Carl. So now, I'll break yours."
He lunged, jabbing the shiv between Carl's ribs. Carl cried out. Jim stabbed again, and again, and again. Alarms sounded in the distance, as the prison guards tackled Jim against the wall. Carl collapsed to the floor, bleeding out of every orifice, and gasped his final, bloody breath.

The prison guards arrived and, upon seeing the knife-wielding Jim standing over the bloody body of the inmate known as Carl, knew instantly what had happened.
"Seize him!" Cried the lead guard.
Grinning manically, Jim twirled his knife around and slit the throat of the first sucker to reach him.

BANG! BANG! The guards shot Jim twice in the chest. Jim collapsed to the floor, convulsing.
God sighed. "This is turning into the shittiest_ day ever. Rosalie, get down there and save him! I do NOT want to have to find a new king of Israel!"
breakingamber
Posts: 1,422
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12/10/2015 11:56:00 PM
Posted: 12 months ago
At 12/9/2015 12:59:50 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:55:20 AM, Beginner wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:19:17 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM, Beginner wrote:
"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.

Jim shook with rage. He gripped the shiv so tight that his knuckles hurt. "You broke my heart, Carl. So now, I'll break yours."
He lunged, jabbing the shiv between Carl's ribs. Carl cried out. Jim stabbed again, and again, and again. Alarms sounded in the distance, as the prison guards tackled Jim against the wall. Carl collapsed to the floor, bleeding out of every orifice, and gasped his final, bloody breath.

The prison guards arrived and, upon seeing the knife-wielding Jim standing over the bloody body of the inmate known as Carl, knew instantly what had happened.
"Seize him!" Cried the lead guard.
Grinning manically, Jim twirled his knife around and slit the throat of the first sucker to reach him.

BANG! BANG! The guards shot Jim twice in the chest. Jim collapsed to the floor, convulsing.
God sighed. "This is turning into the shittiest_ day ever. Rosalie, get down there and save him! I do NOT want to have to find a new king of Israel!"

So, Rosalie thought quickly and grabbed her own futuristic-technology-gun-thingy that only killed prison guards.

However, an unexpected glitch occured: The futuristic-technology-gun-thingy also killed everyone in a 100000 lightyear radius whose name began with "T"
MAY THE WRATH OF THE MODS BE UPON YOU!
- Master Elodin

"When will [Obliteration] learn that Funtimes' plan of saving/destroying the world with pancakes is the only way? "
"She wouldn't even have to make real pancakes! Just the batter, and Obliteration could cook it with his powers! OBLITERATION, YOU'RE WASTING YOUR TALENTS"
- Voidus and TwiLyghtSansSparkles

"An Epic stage magician and a zombie dinosaur? She sure as Braize won"t pull the line there!"
- Edgedancer
breakingamber
Posts: 1,422
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12/11/2015 12:06:52 AM
Posted: 12 months ago
At 12/10/2015 11:56:00 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:59:50 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:55:20 AM, Beginner wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:19:17 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM, Beginner wrote:
"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.

Jim shook with rage. He gripped the shiv so tight that his knuckles hurt. "You broke my heart, Carl. So now, I'll break yours."
He lunged, jabbing the shiv between Carl's ribs. Carl cried out. Jim stabbed again, and again, and again. Alarms sounded in the distance, as the prison guards tackled Jim against the wall. Carl collapsed to the floor, bleeding out of every orifice, and gasped his final, bloody breath.

The prison guards arrived and, upon seeing the knife-wielding Jim standing over the bloody body of the inmate known as Carl, knew instantly what had happened.
"Seize him!" Cried the lead guard.
Grinning manically, Jim twirled his knife around and slit the throat of the first sucker to reach him.

BANG! BANG! The guards shot Jim twice in the chest. Jim collapsed to the floor, convulsing.
God sighed. "This is turning into the shittiest_ day ever. Rosalie, get down there and save him! I do NOT want to have to find a new king of Israel!"

So, Rosalie thought quickly and grabbed her own futuristic-technology-gun-thingy that only killed prison guards.

However, an unexpected glitch occured: The futuristic-technology-gun-thingy also killed everyone in a 100000 lightyear radius whose name began with "T"

//Might as well go twice in the row to bump this thing up.

So, billions of people died, decillions of non-people died (termites)
Rosalie said, "What have I done?"

Then, Jim John, who had gone insane, stabbed poor Rosalie in her heart with the shiv.
MAY THE WRATH OF THE MODS BE UPON YOU!
- Master Elodin

"When will [Obliteration] learn that Funtimes' plan of saving/destroying the world with pancakes is the only way? "
"She wouldn't even have to make real pancakes! Just the batter, and Obliteration could cook it with his powers! OBLITERATION, YOU'RE WASTING YOUR TALENTS"
- Voidus and TwiLyghtSansSparkles

"An Epic stage magician and a zombie dinosaur? She sure as Braize won"t pull the line there!"
- Edgedancer
yomama12
Posts: 340
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12/14/2015 3:11:40 PM
Posted: 11 months ago
At 12/11/2015 12:06:52 AM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/10/2015 11:56:00 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:59:50 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:55:20 AM, Beginner wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:19:17 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM, Beginner wrote:
"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.

Jim shook with rage. He gripped the shiv so tight that his knuckles hurt. "You broke my heart, Carl. So now, I'll break yours."
He lunged, jabbing the shiv between Carl's ribs. Carl cried out. Jim stabbed again, and again, and again. Alarms sounded in the distance, as the prison guards tackled Jim against the wall. Carl collapsed to the floor, bleeding out of every orifice, and gasped his final, bloody breath.

The prison guards arrived and, upon seeing the knife-wielding Jim standing over the bloody body of the inmate known as Carl, knew instantly what had happened.
"Seize him!" Cried the lead guard.
Grinning manically, Jim twirled his knife around and slit the throat of the first sucker to reach him.

BANG! BANG! The guards shot Jim twice in the chest. Jim collapsed to the floor, convulsing.
God sighed. "This is turning into the shittiest_ day ever. Rosalie, get down there and save him! I do NOT want to have to find a new king of Israel!"

So, Rosalie thought quickly and grabbed her own futuristic-technology-gun-thingy that only killed prison guards.

However, an unexpected glitch occured: The futuristic-technology-gun-thingy also killed everyone in a 100000 lightyear radius whose name began with "T"

//Might as well go twice in the row to bump this thing up.

So, billions of people died, decillions of non-people died (termites)
Rosalie said, "What have I done?"

Then, Jim John, who had gone insane, stabbed poor Rosalie in her heart with the shiv.

At least she thought she did, but when the knife came out, no blood did. Only electrical wires and oil. "What..." Jim John shrieked, then felt a punch to the face, so hard he smashed through the cinderblock wall and crashed into the lawn outside. When he looked up, Rosalie's masked was peeled off, and the true image revealed... Rosalie was actually Mecha-Hitler!
"Psycotic. Thats a three syllable word that explains ideas too big for little minds" -Alexander Luthor

"I choose not to take sides. No matter which I choose, someone's gonna be pissy with me." -Me.

"If I had wanted to be sober, I wouldn't have gotten drunk." -Unity

"Some people say I'm not smart. Those people get my fist." -Farkas
breakingamber
Posts: 1,422
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12/14/2015 4:10:05 PM
Posted: 11 months ago
At 12/14/2015 3:11:40 PM, yomama12 wrote:
At 12/11/2015 12:06:52 AM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/10/2015 11:56:00 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:59:50 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:55:20 AM, Beginner wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:19:17 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM, Beginner wrote:
"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.

Jim shook with rage. He gripped the shiv so tight that his knuckles hurt. "You broke my heart, Carl. So now, I'll break yours."
He lunged, jabbing the shiv between Carl's ribs. Carl cried out. Jim stabbed again, and again, and again. Alarms sounded in the distance, as the prison guards tackled Jim against the wall. Carl collapsed to the floor, bleeding out of every orifice, and gasped his final, bloody breath.

The prison guards arrived and, upon seeing the knife-wielding Jim standing over the bloody body of the inmate known as Carl, knew instantly what had happened.
"Seize him!" Cried the lead guard.
Grinning manically, Jim twirled his knife around and slit the throat of the first sucker to reach him.

BANG! BANG! The guards shot Jim twice in the chest. Jim collapsed to the floor, convulsing.
God sighed. "This is turning into the shittiest_ day ever. Rosalie, get down there and save him! I do NOT want to have to find a new king of Israel!"

So, Rosalie thought quickly and grabbed her own futuristic-technology-gun-thingy that only killed prison guards.

However, an unexpected glitch occured: The futuristic-technology-gun-thingy also killed everyone in a 100000 lightyear radius whose name began with "T"

//Might as well go twice in the row to bump this thing up.

So, billions of people died, decillions of non-people died (termites)
Rosalie said, "What have I done?"

Then, Jim John, who had gone insane, stabbed poor Rosalie in her heart with the shiv.

At least she thought she did, but when the knife came out, no blood did. Only electrical wires and oil. "What..." Jim John shrieked, then felt a punch to the face, so hard he smashed through the cinderblock wall and crashed into the lawn outside. When he looked up, Rosalie's masked was peeled off, and the true image revealed... Rosalie was actually Mecha-Hitler!

Chapter 3: Revenge of the Insects

//This is actually turning out to be a good story!

The actual spirit of Rosalie saw what Mecha-Hitler was doing (Rosalie had been killed a few minutes ago and had been replaced) and then saw the mounds of dead termites outside the jail. She then raced to a colony of ants and told them the news. The ants riled up to defeat Mecha-Hitler and called up all the other ant colonies (plus other insects) and rushed at the machine, who was slowly moving toward Jim John.
MAY THE WRATH OF THE MODS BE UPON YOU!
- Master Elodin

"When will [Obliteration] learn that Funtimes' plan of saving/destroying the world with pancakes is the only way? "
"She wouldn't even have to make real pancakes! Just the batter, and Obliteration could cook it with his powers! OBLITERATION, YOU'RE WASTING YOUR TALENTS"
- Voidus and TwiLyghtSansSparkles

"An Epic stage magician and a zombie dinosaur? She sure as Braize won"t pull the line there!"
- Edgedancer
Deb-8-A-Bull
Posts: 2,181
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12/14/2015 4:11:57 PM
Posted: 11 months ago
At 12/14/2015 3:11:40 PM, yomama12 wrote:
At 12/11/2015 12:06:52 AM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/10/2015 11:56:00 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:59:50 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:55:20 AM, Beginner wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:19:17 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM, Beginner wrote:
"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.

Jim shook with rage. He gripped the shiv so tight that his knuckles hurt. "You broke my heart, Carl. So now, I'll break yours."
He lunged, jabbing the shiv between Carl's ribs. Carl cried out. Jim stabbed again, and again, and again. Alarms sounded in the distance, as the prison guards tackled Jim against the wall. Carl collapsed to the floor, bleeding out of every orifice, and gasped his final, bloody breath.

The prison guards arrived and, upon seeing the knife-wielding Jim standing over the bloody body of the inmate known as Carl, knew instantly what had happened.
"Seize him!" Cried the lead guard.
Grinning manically, Jim twirled his knife around and slit the throat of the first sucker to reach him.

BANG! BANG! The guards shot Jim twice in the chest. Jim collapsed to the floor, convulsing.
God sighed. "This is turning into the shittiest_ day ever. Rosalie, get down there and save him! I do NOT want to have to find a new king of Israel!"

So, Rosalie thought quickly and grabbed her own futuristic-technology-gun-thingy that only killed prison guards.

However, an unexpected glitch occured: The futuristic-technology-gun-thingy also killed everyone in a 100000 lightyear radius whose name began with "T"

//Might as well go twice in the row to bump this thing up.

So, billions of people died, decillions of non-people died (termites)
Rosalie said, "What have I done?"

Then, Jim John, who had gone insane, stabbed poor Rosalie in her heart with the shiv.

At least she thought she did, but when the knife came out, no blood did. Only electrical wires and oil. "What..." Jim John shrieked, then felt a punch to the face, so hard he smashed through the cinderblock wall and crashed into the lawn outside. When he looked up, Rosalie's masked was peeled off, and the true image revealed... Rosalie was actually Mecha-Hitler!

Jim John quickly grabbed for the wires. Connecting the red wire to the green and yellow to the brown then flicking the off switch. He counted to 5 then switched it back on . minutes past . A small screen popped up saying must update client. Knowing this could take between 5 mins to 5 hrs. Jim John just left.
breakingamber
Posts: 1,422
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12/14/2015 6:41:51 PM
Posted: 11 months ago
At 12/14/2015 4:11:57 PM, Deb-8-A-Bull wrote:
At 12/14/2015 3:11:40 PM, yomama12 wrote:
At 12/11/2015 12:06:52 AM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/10/2015 11:56:00 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:59:50 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:55:20 AM, Beginner wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:19:17 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM, Beginner wrote:
"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.

Jim shook with rage. He gripped the shiv so tight that his knuckles hurt. "You broke my heart, Carl. So now, I'll break yours."
He lunged, jabbing the shiv between Carl's ribs. Carl cried out. Jim stabbed again, and again, and again. Alarms sounded in the distance, as the prison guards tackled Jim against the wall. Carl collapsed to the floor, bleeding out of every orifice, and gasped his final, bloody breath.

The prison guards arrived and, upon seeing the knife-wielding Jim standing over the bloody body of the inmate known as Carl, knew instantly what had happened.
"Seize him!" Cried the lead guard.
Grinning manically, Jim twirled his knife around and slit the throat of the first sucker to reach him.

BANG! BANG! The guards shot Jim twice in the chest. Jim collapsed to the floor, convulsing.
God sighed. "This is turning into the shittiest_ day ever. Rosalie, get down there and save him! I do NOT want to have to find a new king of Israel!"

So, Rosalie thought quickly and grabbed her own futuristic-technology-gun-thingy that only killed prison guards.

However, an unexpected glitch occured: The futuristic-technology-gun-thingy also killed everyone in a 100000 lightyear radius whose name began with "T"

//Might as well go twice in the row to bump this thing up.

So, billions of people died, decillions of non-people died (termites)
Rosalie said, "What have I done?"

Then, Jim John, who had gone insane, stabbed poor Rosalie in her heart with the shiv.

At least she thought she did, but when the knife came out, no blood did. Only electrical wires and oil. "What..." Jim John shrieked, then felt a punch to the face, so hard he smashed through the cinderblock wall and crashed into the lawn outside. When he looked up, Rosalie's masked was peeled off, and the true image revealed... Rosalie was actually Mecha-Hitler!

Chapter 3: Revenge of the Insects

//This is actually turning out to be a good story!

The actual spirit of Rosalie saw what Mecha-Hitler was doing (Rosalie had been killed a few minutes ago and had been replaced) and then saw the mounds of dead termites outside the jail. She then raced to a colony of ants and told them the news. The ants riled up to defeat Mecha-Hitler and called up all the other ant colonies (plus other insects) and rushed at the machine, who was slowly moving toward Jim John.
Jim John quickly grabbed for the wires. Connecting the red wire to the green and yellow to the brown then flicking the off switch. He counted to 5 then switched it back on . minutes past . A small screen popped up saying must update client. Knowing this could take between 5 mins to 5 hrs. Jim John just left.

Soon after Jim John left, the Mecha-Hitler finished updating (to be exact, 7 minutes afterward), the Mecha-Hitler's mission was clear: Kill the future King of Israel!

However, a few billion insects came and tore the Mecha-Hitler apart.

As for Jim John, his close encounter with death drove him to the brink of insanity, and tripping on a soda can while trying to throw his shiv at a relatively attractive woman drove him over the brink.
Translation: He went sane again.
MAY THE WRATH OF THE MODS BE UPON YOU!
- Master Elodin

"When will [Obliteration] learn that Funtimes' plan of saving/destroying the world with pancakes is the only way? "
"She wouldn't even have to make real pancakes! Just the batter, and Obliteration could cook it with his powers! OBLITERATION, YOU'RE WASTING YOUR TALENTS"
- Voidus and TwiLyghtSansSparkles

"An Epic stage magician and a zombie dinosaur? She sure as Braize won"t pull the line there!"
- Edgedancer
Vaarka
Posts: 7,549
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12/14/2015 11:17:35 PM
Posted: 11 months ago
At 12/14/2015 6:41:51 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/14/2015 4:11:57 PM, Deb-8-A-Bull wrote:
At 12/14/2015 3:11:40 PM, yomama12 wrote:
At 12/11/2015 12:06:52 AM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/10/2015 11:56:00 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:59:50 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:55:20 AM, Beginner wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:19:17 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM, Beginner wrote:
"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.

Jim shook with rage. He gripped the shiv so tight that his knuckles hurt. "You broke my heart, Carl. So now, I'll break yours."
He lunged, jabbing the shiv between Carl's ribs. Carl cried out. Jim stabbed again, and again, and again. Alarms sounded in the distance, as the prison guards tackled Jim against the wall. Carl collapsed to the floor, bleeding out of every orifice, and gasped his final, bloody breath.

The prison guards arrived and, upon seeing the knife-wielding Jim standing over the bloody body of the inmate known as Carl, knew instantly what had happened.
"Seize him!" Cried the lead guard.
Grinning manically, Jim twirled his knife around and slit the throat of the first sucker to reach him.

BANG! BANG! The guards shot Jim twice in the chest. Jim collapsed to the floor, convulsing.
God sighed. "This is turning into the shittiest_ day ever. Rosalie, get down there and save him! I do NOT want to have to find a new king of Israel!"

So, Rosalie thought quickly and grabbed her own futuristic-technology-gun-thingy that only killed prison guards.

However, an unexpected glitch occured: The futuristic-technology-gun-thingy also killed everyone in a 100000 lightyear radius whose name began with "T"

//Might as well go twice in the row to bump this thing up.

So, billions of people died, decillions of non-people died (termites)
Rosalie said, "What have I done?"

Then, Jim John, who had gone insane, stabbed poor Rosalie in her heart with the shiv.

At least she thought she did, but when the knife came out, no blood did. Only electrical wires and oil. "What..." Jim John shrieked, then felt a punch to the face, so hard he smashed through the cinderblock wall and crashed into the lawn outside. When he looked up, Rosalie's masked was peeled off, and the true image revealed... Rosalie was actually Mecha-Hitler!

Chapter 3: Revenge of the Insects

//This is actually turning out to be a good story!

The actual spirit of Rosalie saw what Mecha-Hitler was doing (Rosalie had been killed a few minutes ago and had been replaced) and then saw the mounds of dead termites outside the jail. She then raced to a colony of ants and told them the news. The ants riled up to defeat Mecha-Hitler and called up all the other ant colonies (plus other insects) and rushed at the machine, who was slowly moving toward Jim John.
Jim John quickly grabbed for the wires. Connecting the red wire to the green and yellow to the brown then flicking the off switch. He counted to 5 then switched it back on . minutes past . A small screen popped up saying must update client. Knowing this could take between 5 mins to 5 hrs. Jim John just left.

Soon after Jim John left, the Mecha-Hitler finished updating (to be exact, 7 minutes afterward), the Mecha-Hitler's mission was clear: Kill the future King of Israel!

However, a few billion insects came and tore the Mecha-Hitler apart.

As for Jim John, his close encounter with death drove him to the brink of insanity, and tripping on a soda can while trying to throw his shiv at a relatively attractive woman drove him over the brink.
Translation: He went sane again.

As Jim John's sanity returned, he stopped mid launch. The shiv still in his bloody hand, he nearly went limp as every memory of what had happened, from Carl, to Rosalie, to the ants, to Mecha-Hitler, came back to his criminal head. Slowly, he turned back, staring at the can that had just tripped him back to sanity...and he was furious. The tall, scarred Jim John, the type to resemble a hot dog that was swollen in the middle, began to stomp the can into the pavement, screaming in Arabic as he did so.

This wasn't what he wanted. Things were so much easier when he was insane. Why did he have to go back? Why did he have to trip over that can?

"Sir, are you okay?" the attractive woman asked, noticing Jim John in his rageful state. Jim John's wild eyes turned towards her, blood slowly dripping down his chin. He awkwardly stood up straight and took a step closer, opening his sore jaw to respond...
You're probably thinking right now "haha I'm a genius". Well you're not -Valkrin

inferno: "I don't know, are you attracted to women?"
ButterCatX: "No, Vaarka is mine!"

All hail scum Vaarka, wielder of the bastard sword, smiter of nations, destroyer of spiders -VOT

"Vaarka, I've been thinking about this for a long time now," (pulls out small box made of macaroni) "W-will you be my noodle buddy?" -Kirigaya
breakingamber
Posts: 1,422
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12/14/2015 11:22:05 PM
Posted: 11 months ago
At 12/14/2015 11:17:35 PM, Vaarka wrote:
At 12/14/2015 6:41:51 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/14/2015 4:11:57 PM, Deb-8-A-Bull wrote:
At 12/14/2015 3:11:40 PM, yomama12 wrote:
At 12/11/2015 12:06:52 AM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/10/2015 11:56:00 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:59:50 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:55:20 AM, Beginner wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:19:17 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM, Beginner wrote:
"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.

Jim shook with rage. He gripped the shiv so tight that his knuckles hurt. "You broke my heart, Carl. So now, I'll break yours."
He lunged, jabbing the shiv between Carl's ribs. Carl cried out. Jim stabbed again, and again, and again. Alarms sounded in the distance, as the prison guards tackled Jim against the wall. Carl collapsed to the floor, bleeding out of every orifice, and gasped his final, bloody breath.

The prison guards arrived and, upon seeing the knife-wielding Jim standing over the bloody body of the inmate known as Carl, knew instantly what had happened.
"Seize him!" Cried the lead guard.
Grinning manically, Jim twirled his knife around and slit the throat of the first sucker to reach him.

BANG! BANG! The guards shot Jim twice in the chest. Jim collapsed to the floor, convulsing.
God sighed. "This is turning into the shittiest_ day ever. Rosalie, get down there and save him! I do NOT want to have to find a new king of Israel!"

So, Rosalie thought quickly and grabbed her own futuristic-technology-gun-thingy that only killed prison guards.

However, an unexpected glitch occured: The futuristic-technology-gun-thingy also killed everyone in a 100000 lightyear radius whose name began with "T"

//Might as well go twice in the row to bump this thing up.

So, billions of people died, decillions of non-people died (termites)
Rosalie said, "What have I done?"

Then, Jim John, who had gone insane, stabbed poor Rosalie in her heart with the shiv.

At least she thought she did, but when the knife came out, no blood did. Only electrical wires and oil. "What..." Jim John shrieked, then felt a punch to the face, so hard he smashed through the cinderblock wall and crashed into the lawn outside. When he looked up, Rosalie's masked was peeled off, and the true image revealed... Rosalie was actually Mecha-Hitler!

Chapter 3: Revenge of the Insects

//This is actually turning out to be a good story!

The actual spirit of Rosalie saw what Mecha-Hitler was doing (Rosalie had been killed a few minutes ago and had been replaced) and then saw the mounds of dead termites outside the jail. She then raced to a colony of ants and told them the news. The ants riled up to defeat Mecha-Hitler and called up all the other ant colonies (plus other insects) and rushed at the machine, who was slowly moving toward Jim John.
Jim John quickly grabbed for the wires. Connecting the red wire to the green and yellow to the brown then flicking the off switch. He counted to 5 then switched it back on . minutes past . A small screen popped up saying must update client. Knowing this could take between 5 mins to 5 hrs. Jim John just left.

Soon after Jim John left, the Mecha-Hitler finished updating (to be exact, 7 minutes afterward), the Mecha-Hitler's mission was clear: Kill the future King of Israel!

However, a few billion insects came and tore the Mecha-Hitler apart.

As for Jim John, his close encounter with death drove him to the brink of insanity, and tripping on a soda can while trying to throw his shiv at a relatively attractive woman drove him over the brink.
Translation: He went sane again.

As Jim John's sanity returned, he stopped mid launch. The shiv still in his bloody hand, he nearly went limp as every memory of what had happened, from Carl, to Rosalie, to the ants, to Mecha-Hitler, came back to his criminal head. Slowly, he turned back, staring at the can that had just tripped him back to sanity...and he was furious. The tall, scarred Jim John, the type to resemble a hot dog that was swollen in the middle, began to stomp the can into the pavement, screaming in Arabic as he did so.

This wasn't what he wanted. Things were so much easier when he was insane. Why did he have to go back? Why did he have to trip over that can?

"Sir, are you okay?" the attractive woman asked, noticing Jim John in his rageful state. Jim John's wild eyes turned towards her, blood slowly dripping down his chin. He awkwardly stood up straight and took a step closer, opening his sore jaw to respond...

Then Rosalie spoke (God had given her a new body): "You have been chosen by God to become the new king of Israel."
Then a bunch of prison guards ran down the street screaming, "AAH!!! The Mecha-Hitler!"

Jim John and Rosalie turned to look and saw the Mecha-Hitler, ravaged by the ants, but still standing and lumbering towards them...
MAY THE WRATH OF THE MODS BE UPON YOU!
- Master Elodin

"When will [Obliteration] learn that Funtimes' plan of saving/destroying the world with pancakes is the only way? "
"She wouldn't even have to make real pancakes! Just the batter, and Obliteration could cook it with his powers! OBLITERATION, YOU'RE WASTING YOUR TALENTS"
- Voidus and TwiLyghtSansSparkles

"An Epic stage magician and a zombie dinosaur? She sure as Braize won"t pull the line there!"
- Edgedancer
Vaarka
Posts: 7,549
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12/15/2015 1:02:24 AM
Posted: 11 months ago
At 12/14/2015 11:22:05 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/14/2015 11:17:35 PM, Vaarka wrote:
At 12/14/2015 6:41:51 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/14/2015 4:11:57 PM, Deb-8-A-Bull wrote:
At 12/14/2015 3:11:40 PM, yomama12 wrote:
At 12/11/2015 12:06:52 AM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/10/2015 11:56:00 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:59:50 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:55:20 AM, Beginner wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:19:17 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM, Beginner wrote:
"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.

Jim shook with rage. He gripped the shiv so tight that his knuckles hurt. "You broke my heart, Carl. So now, I'll break yours."
He lunged, jabbing the shiv between Carl's ribs. Carl cried out. Jim stabbed again, and again, and again. Alarms sounded in the distance, as the prison guards tackled Jim against the wall. Carl collapsed to the floor, bleeding out of every orifice, and gasped his final, bloody breath.

The prison guards arrived and, upon seeing the knife-wielding Jim standing over the bloody body of the inmate known as Carl, knew instantly what had happened.
"Seize him!" Cried the lead guard.
Grinning manically, Jim twirled his knife around and slit the throat of the first sucker to reach him.

BANG! BANG! The guards shot Jim twice in the chest. Jim collapsed to the floor, convulsing.
God sighed. "This is turning into the shittiest_ day ever. Rosalie, get down there and save him! I do NOT want to have to find a new king of Israel!"

So, Rosalie thought quickly and grabbed her own futuristic-technology-gun-thingy that only killed prison guards.

However, an unexpected glitch occured: The futuristic-technology-gun-thingy also killed everyone in a 100000 lightyear radius whose name began with "T"

//Might as well go twice in the row to bump this thing up.

So, billions of people died, decillions of non-people died (termites)
Rosalie said, "What have I done?"

Then, Jim John, who had gone insane, stabbed poor Rosalie in her heart with the shiv.

At least she thought she did, but when the knife came out, no blood did. Only electrical wires and oil. "What..." Jim John shrieked, then felt a punch to the face, so hard he smashed through the cinderblock wall and crashed into the lawn outside. When he looked up, Rosalie's masked was peeled off, and the true image revealed... Rosalie was actually Mecha-Hitler!

Chapter 3: Revenge of the Insects

//This is actually turning out to be a good story!

The actual spirit of Rosalie saw what Mecha-Hitler was doing (Rosalie had been killed a few minutes ago and had been replaced) and then saw the mounds of dead termites outside the jail. She then raced to a colony of ants and told them the news. The ants riled up to defeat Mecha-Hitler and called up all the other ant colonies (plus other insects) and rushed at the machine, who was slowly moving toward Jim John.
Jim John quickly grabbed for the wires. Connecting the red wire to the green and yellow to the brown then flicking the off switch. He counted to 5 then switched it back on . minutes past . A small screen popped up saying must update client. Knowing this could take between 5 mins to 5 hrs. Jim John just left.

Soon after Jim John left, the Mecha-Hitler finished updating (to be exact, 7 minutes afterward), the Mecha-Hitler's mission was clear: Kill the future King of Israel!

However, a few billion insects came and tore the Mecha-Hitler apart.

As for Jim John, his close encounter with death drove him to the brink of insanity, and tripping on a soda can while trying to throw his shiv at a relatively attractive woman drove him over the brink.
Translation: He went sane again.

As Jim John's sanity returned, he stopped mid launch. The shiv still in his bloody hand, he nearly went limp as every memory of what had happened, from Carl, to Rosalie, to the ants, to Mecha-Hitler, came back to his criminal head. Slowly, he turned back, staring at the can that had just tripped him back to sanity...and he was furious. The tall, scarred Jim John, the type to resemble a hot dog that was swollen in the middle, began to stomp the can into the pavement, screaming in Arabic as he did so.

This wasn't what he wanted. Things were so much easier when he was insane. Why did he have to go back? Why did he have to trip over that can?

"Sir, are you okay?" the attractive woman asked, noticing Jim John in his rageful state. Jim John's wild eyes turned towards her, blood slowly dripping down his chin. He awkwardly stood up straight and took a step closer, opening his sore jaw to respond...

Then Rosalie spoke (God had given her a new body): "You have been chosen by God to become the new king of Israel."
Then a bunch of prison guards ran down the street screaming, "AAH!!! The Mecha-Hitler!"

Jim John and Rosalie turned to look and saw the Mecha-Hitler, ravaged by the ants, but still standing and lumbering towards them...

"Sweet Gillery Crackers!" Jim John yelled, stepping to run away (of course after stabbing his shiv into the woman's throat). The mecha-hitler recognized his face, and began to charge towards them like a titan. In mere seconds, the mecha-hitler was feet away, lifting a foot to smash down onto the future king of Israel. Several spikes lined the bottom of it's foot, and the boot came down harder than my math grades.

"OH SHI-"

Rosalie quickly grabbed Jim John's arm with her ghastly hand. He glanced over to see golden lines wrapping around her body begin to glow bright, and her eyes beamed brightly as golden particles began to surround them like beautiful fire. Then, in a flash, everything went dark.

When Jim John opened his eyes, everything was blurry, and it took time for his eyes to focus. He recognized something, noise in fact. It was noisy wherever he now was, and it sounded like the average restaurant.

"Ow-hay are-ay ou-yay eeling-fay?" Rosalie asked.

Jim John blinked, giving her a quizzical look. "What?"

Rosalie leaned in close, whispering into his ear, "There are people around us, people who would love to turn you in, or kill a king for glory. We're both disguised, and we need to speak in a language foreign to them, or else we risk being killed." Rosalie leaned back, and continued. "Ou-yay are-ay estined-day o-tay e-bay he-tay ing-kay of-ay Israel-ay...o-day ou-yay understand-ay?"...
You're probably thinking right now "haha I'm a genius". Well you're not -Valkrin

inferno: "I don't know, are you attracted to women?"
ButterCatX: "No, Vaarka is mine!"

All hail scum Vaarka, wielder of the bastard sword, smiter of nations, destroyer of spiders -VOT

"Vaarka, I've been thinking about this for a long time now," (pulls out small box made of macaroni) "W-will you be my noodle buddy?" -Kirigaya
breakingamber
Posts: 1,422
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12/15/2015 1:09:06 AM
Posted: 11 months ago
At 12/15/2015 1:02:24 AM, Vaarka wrote:
At 12/14/2015 11:22:05 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/14/2015 11:17:35 PM, Vaarka wrote:
At 12/14/2015 6:41:51 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/14/2015 4:11:57 PM, Deb-8-A-Bull wrote:
At 12/14/2015 3:11:40 PM, yomama12 wrote:
At 12/11/2015 12:06:52 AM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/10/2015 11:56:00 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:59:50 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:55:20 AM, Beginner wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:19:17 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM, Beginner wrote:
"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.

Jim shook with rage. He gripped the shiv so tight that his knuckles hurt. "You broke my heart, Carl. So now, I'll break yours."
He lunged, jabbing the shiv between Carl's ribs. Carl cried out. Jim stabbed again, and again, and again. Alarms sounded in the distance, as the prison guards tackled Jim against the wall. Carl collapsed to the floor, bleeding out of every orifice, and gasped his final, bloody breath.

The prison guards arrived and, upon seeing the knife-wielding Jim standing over the bloody body of the inmate known as Carl, knew instantly what had happened.
"Seize him!" Cried the lead guard.
Grinning manically, Jim twirled his knife around and slit the throat of the first sucker to reach him.

BANG! BANG! The guards shot Jim twice in the chest. Jim collapsed to the floor, convulsing.
God sighed. "This is turning into the shittiest_ day ever. Rosalie, get down there and save him! I do NOT want to have to find a new king of Israel!"

So, Rosalie thought quickly and grabbed her own futuristic-technology-gun-thingy that only killed prison guards.

However, an unexpected glitch occured: The futuristic-technology-gun-thingy also killed everyone in a 100000 lightyear radius whose name began with "T"

//Might as well go twice in the row to bump this thing up.

So, billions of people died, decillions of non-people died (termites)
Rosalie said, "What have I done?"

Then, Jim John, who had gone insane, stabbed poor Rosalie in her heart with the shiv.

At least she thought she did, but when the knife came out, no blood did. Only electrical wires and oil. "What..." Jim John shrieked, then felt a punch to the face, so hard he smashed through the cinderblock wall and crashed into the lawn outside. When he looked up, Rosalie's masked was peeled off, and the true image revealed... Rosalie was actually Mecha-Hitler!

Chapter 3: Revenge of the Insects

//This is actually turning out to be a good story!

The actual spirit of Rosalie saw what Mecha-Hitler was doing (Rosalie had been killed a few minutes ago and had been replaced) and then saw the mounds of dead termites outside the jail. She then raced to a colony of ants and told them the news. The ants riled up to defeat Mecha-Hitler and called up all the other ant colonies (plus other insects) and rushed at the machine, who was slowly moving toward Jim John.
Jim John quickly grabbed for the wires. Connecting the red wire to the green and yellow to the brown then flicking the off switch. He counted to 5 then switched it back on . minutes past . A small screen popped up saying must update client. Knowing this could take between 5 mins to 5 hrs. Jim John just left.

Soon after Jim John left, the Mecha-Hitler finished updating (to be exact, 7 minutes afterward), the Mecha-Hitler's mission was clear: Kill the future King of Israel!

However, a few billion insects came and tore the Mecha-Hitler apart.

As for Jim John, his close encounter with death drove him to the brink of insanity, and tripping on a soda can while trying to throw his shiv at a relatively attractive woman drove him over the brink.
Translation: He went sane again.

As Jim John's sanity returned, he stopped mid launch. The shiv still in his bloody hand, he nearly went limp as every memory of what had happened, from Carl, to Rosalie, to the ants, to Mecha-Hitler, came back to his criminal head. Slowly, he turned back, staring at the can that had just tripped him back to sanity...and he was furious. The tall, scarred Jim John, the type to resemble a hot dog that was swollen in the middle, began to stomp the can into the pavement, screaming in Arabic as he did so.

This wasn't what he wanted. Things were so much easier when he was insane. Why did he have to go back? Why did he have to trip over that can?

"Sir, are you okay?" the attractive woman asked, noticing Jim John in his rageful state. Jim John's wild eyes turned towards her, blood slowly dripping down his chin. He awkwardly stood up straight and took a step closer, opening his sore jaw to respond...

Then Rosalie spoke (God had given her a new body): "You have been chosen by God to become the new king of Israel."
Then a bunch of prison guards ran down the street screaming, "AAH!!! The Mecha-Hitler!"

Jim John and Rosalie turned to look and saw the Mecha-Hitler, ravaged by the ants, but still standing and lumbering towards them...

"Sweet Gillery Crackers!" Jim John yelled, stepping to run away (of course after stabbing his shiv into the woman's throat). The mecha-hitler recognized his face, and began to charge towards them like a titan. In mere seconds, the mecha-hitler was feet away, lifting a foot to smash down onto the future king of Israel. Several spikes lined the bottom of it's foot, and the boot came down harder than my math grades.

"OH SHI-"

Rosalie quickly grabbed Jim John's arm with her ghastly hand. He glanced over to see golden lines wrapping around her body begin to glow bright, and her eyes beamed brightly as golden particles began to surround them like beautiful fire. Then, in a flash, everything went dark.

When Jim John opened his eyes, everything was blurry, and it took time for his eyes to focus. He recognized something, noise in fact. It was noisy wherever he now was, and it sounded like the average restaurant.

"Ow-hay are-ay ou-yay eeling-fay?" Rosalie asked.

Jim John blinked, giving her a quizzical look. "What?"

Rosalie leaned in close, whispering into his ear, "There are people around us, people who would love to turn you in, or kill a king for glory. We're both disguised, and we need to speak in a language foreign to them, or else we risk being killed." Rosalie leaned back, and continued. "Ou-yay are-ay estined-day o-tay e-bay he-tay ing-kay of-ay Israel-ay...o-day ou-yay understand-ay?"...

"You realize, that Pig Latin isn't a language?" said Jim.
A couple of guys sitting at the nearby table muttered something about death.
Jim John switched to Pig Latin.
"Ine-fay. At-whay is-ay our-yay ame-nay? Ow-hay o-day ou-yay ow-knay y-may ame-nay?"
Rosalie stood up, paid for their order, and left the restaurant.
Then, in an alley, she spoke in plain English...
MAY THE WRATH OF THE MODS BE UPON YOU!
- Master Elodin

"When will [Obliteration] learn that Funtimes' plan of saving/destroying the world with pancakes is the only way? "
"She wouldn't even have to make real pancakes! Just the batter, and Obliteration could cook it with his powers! OBLITERATION, YOU'RE WASTING YOUR TALENTS"
- Voidus and TwiLyghtSansSparkles

"An Epic stage magician and a zombie dinosaur? She sure as Braize won"t pull the line there!"
- Edgedancer
Vaarka
Posts: 7,549
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12/15/2015 1:10:04 AM
Posted: 11 months ago
At 12/15/2015 1:09:06 AM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/15/2015 1:02:24 AM, Vaarka wrote:
At 12/14/2015 11:22:05 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/14/2015 11:17:35 PM, Vaarka wrote:
At 12/14/2015 6:41:51 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/14/2015 4:11:57 PM, Deb-8-A-Bull wrote:
At 12/14/2015 3:11:40 PM, yomama12 wrote:
At 12/11/2015 12:06:52 AM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/10/2015 11:56:00 PM, breakingamber wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:59:50 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:55:20 AM, Beginner wrote:
At 12/9/2015 12:19:17 AM, SM2 wrote:
At 12/8/2015 11:53:02 PM, Beginner wrote:
"Jim. Stop." Carl pleaded to no avail as the pain and humiliation threatened to overwhelm him.

Jim shook with rage. He gripped the shiv so tight that his knuckles hurt. "You broke my heart, Carl. So now, I'll break yours."
He lunged, jabbing the shiv between Carl's ribs. Carl cried out. Jim stabbed again, and again, and again. Alarms sounded in the distance, as the prison guards tackled Jim against the wall. Carl collapsed to the floor, bleeding out of every orifice, and gasped his final, bloody breath.

The prison guards arrived and, upon seeing the knife-wielding Jim standing over the bloody body of the inmate known as Carl, knew instantly what had happened.
"Seize him!" Cried the lead guard.
Grinning manically, Jim twirled his knife around and slit the throat of the first sucker to reach him.

BANG! BANG! The guards shot Jim twice in the chest. Jim collapsed to the floor, convulsing.
God sighed. "This is turning into the shittiest_ day ever. Rosalie, get down there and save him! I do NOT want to have to find a new king of Israel!"

So, Rosalie thought quickly and grabbed her own futuristic-technology-gun-thingy that only killed prison guards.

However, an unexpected glitch occured: The futuristic-technology-gun-thingy also killed everyone in a 100000 lightyear radius whose name began with "T"

//Might as well go twice in the row to bump this thing up.

So, billions of people died, decillions of non-people died (termites)
Rosalie said, "What have I done?"

Then, Jim John, who had gone insane, stabbed poor Rosalie in her heart with the shiv.

At least she thought she did, but when the knife came out, no blood did. Only electrical wires and oil. "What..." Jim John shrieked, then felt a punch to the face, so hard he smashed through the cinderblock wall and crashed into the lawn outside. When he looked up, Rosalie's masked was peeled off, and the true image revealed... Rosalie was actually Mecha-Hitler!

Chapter 3: Revenge of the Insects

//This is actually turning out to be a good story!

The actual spirit of Rosalie saw what Mecha-Hitler was doing (Rosalie had been killed a few minutes ago and had been replaced) and then saw the mounds of dead termites outside the jail. She then raced to a colony of ants and told them the news. The ants riled up to defeat Mecha-Hitler and called up all the other ant colonies (plus other insects) and rushed at the machine, who was slowly moving toward Jim John.
Jim John quickly grabbed for the wires. Connecting the red wire to the green and yellow to the brown then flicking the off switch. He counted to 5 then switched it back on . minutes past . A small screen popped up saying must update client. Knowing this could take between 5 mins to 5 hrs. Jim John just left.

Soon after Jim John left, the Mecha-Hitler finished updating (to be exact, 7 minutes afterward), the Mecha-Hitler's mission was clear: Kill the future King of Israel!

However, a few billion insects came and tore the Mecha-Hitler apart.

As for Jim John, his close encounter with death drove him to the brink of insanity, and tripping on a soda can while trying to throw his shiv at a relatively attractive woman drove him over the brink.
Translation: He went sane again.

As Jim John's sanity returned, he stopped mid launch. The shiv still in his bloody hand, he nearly went limp as every memory of what had happened, from Carl, to Rosalie, to the ants, to Mecha-Hitler, came back to his criminal head. Slowly, he turned back, staring at the can that had just tripped him back to sanity...and he was furious. The tall, scarred Jim John, the type to resemble a hot dog that was swollen in the middle, began to stomp the can into the pavement, screaming in Arabic as he did so.

This wasn't what he wanted. Things were so much easier when he was insane. Why did he have to go back? Why did he have to trip over that can?

"Sir, are you okay?" the attractive woman asked, noticing Jim John in his rageful state. Jim John's wild eyes turned towards her, blood slowly dripping down his chin. He awkwardly stood up straight and took a step closer, opening his sore jaw to respond...

Then Rosalie spoke (God had given her a new body): "You have been chosen by God to become the new king of Israel."
Then a bunch of prison guards ran down the street screaming, "AAH!!! The Mecha-Hitler!"

Jim John and Rosalie turned to look and saw the Mecha-Hitler, ravaged by the ants, but still standing and lumbering towards them...

"Sweet Gillery Crackers!" Jim John yelled, stepping to run away (of course after stabbing his shiv into the woman's throat). The mecha-hitler recognized his face, and began to charge towards them like a titan. In mere seconds, the mecha-hitler was feet away, lifting a foot to smash down onto the future king of Israel. Several spikes lined the bottom of it's foot, and the boot came down harder than my math grades.

"OH SHI-"

Rosalie quickly grabbed Jim John's arm with her ghastly hand. He glanced over to see golden lines wrapping around her body begin to glow bright, and her eyes beamed brightly as golden particles began to surround them like beautiful fire. Then, in a flash, everything went dark.

When Jim John opened his eyes, everything was blurry, and it took time for his eyes to focus. He recognized something, noise in fact. It was noisy wherever he now was, and it sounded like the average restaurant.

"Ow-hay are-ay ou-yay eeling-fay?" Rosalie asked.

Jim John blinked, giving her a quizzical look. "What?"

Rosalie leaned in close, whispering into his ear, "There are people around us, people who would love to turn you in, or kill a king for glory. We're both disguised, and we need to speak in a language foreign to them, or else we risk being killed." Rosalie leaned back, and continued. "Ou-yay are-ay estined-day o-tay e-bay he-tay ing-kay of-ay Israel-ay...o-day ou-yay understand-ay?"...

"You realize, that Pig Latin isn't a language?" said Jim.
A couple of guys sitting at the nearby table muttered something about death.
Jim John switched to Pig Latin.
"Ine-fay. At-whay is-ay our-yay ame-nay? Ow-hay o-day ou-yay ow-knay y-may ame-nay?"
Rosalie stood up, paid for their order, and left the restaurant.
Then, in an alley, she spoke in plain English...

"Because I'm a f***ing wizard"
You're probably thinking right now "haha I'm a genius". Well you're not -Valkrin

inferno: "I don't know, are you attracted to women?"
ButterCatX: "No, Vaarka is mine!"

All hail scum Vaarka, wielder of the bastard sword, smiter of nations, destroyer of spiders -VOT

"Vaarka, I've been thinking about this for a long time now," (pulls out small box made of macaroni) "W-will you be my noodle buddy?" -Kirigaya
breakingamber
Posts: 1,422
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12/15/2015 1:14:00 AM
Posted: 11 months ago
"Sweet Gillery Crackers!" Jim John yelled, stepping to run away (of course after stabbing his shiv into the woman's throat). The mecha-hitler recognized his face, and began to charge towards them like a titan. In mere seconds, the mecha-hitler was feet away, lifting a foot to smash down onto the future king of Israel. Several spikes lined the bottom of it's foot, and the boot came down harder than my math
"OH SHI-"
Rosalie quickly grabbed Jim John's arm with her ghastly hand. He glanced over to see golden lines wrapping around her body begin to glow bright, and her eyes beamed brightly as golden particles began to surround them like beautiful fire. Then, in a flash, everything went dark.
When Jim John opened his eyes, everything was blurry, and it took time for his eyes to focus. He recognized something, noise in fact. It was noisy wherever he now was, and it sounded like the average restaurant.
"Ow-hay are-ay ou-yay eeling-fay?" Rosalie asked.
Jim John blinked, giving her a quizzical look. "What?"
Rosalie leaned in close, whispering into his ear, "There are people around us, people who would love to turn you in, or kill a king for glory. We're both disguised, and we need to speak in a language foreign to them, or else we risk being killed." Rosalie leaned back, and continued. "Ou-yay are-ay estined-day o-tay e-bay he-tay ing-kay of-ay Israel-ay...o-day ou-yay understand-ay?"...
"You realize, that Pig Latin isn't a language?" said Jim.
A couple of guys sitting at the nearby table muttered something about death.
Jim John switched to Pig Latin.
"Ine-fay. At-whay is-ay our-yay ame-nay? Ow-hay o-day ou-yay ow-knay y-may ame-nay?"
Rosalie stood up, paid for their order, and left the restaurant.
Then, in an alley, she spoke in plain English...
"Because I'm a f*cking wizard"

Jim John sighed. "Another one of those days. I am really sick of really bizarre things happening to my life.
MAY THE WRATH OF THE MODS BE UPON YOU!
- Master Elodin

"When will [Obliteration] learn that Funtimes' plan of saving/destroying the world with pancakes is the only way? "
"She wouldn't even have to make real pancakes! Just the batter, and Obliteration could cook it with his powers! OBLITERATION, YOU'RE WASTING YOUR TALENTS"
- Voidus and TwiLyghtSansSparkles

"An Epic stage magician and a zombie dinosaur? She sure as Braize won"t pull the line there!"
- Edgedancer
Vaarka
Posts: 7,549
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12/15/2015 1:16:09 AM
Posted: 11 months ago
At 12/15/2015 1:14:00 AM, breakingamber wrote:
"Sweet Gillery Crackers!" Jim John yelled, stepping to run away (of course after stabbing his shiv into the woman's throat). The mecha-hitler recognized his face, and began to charge towards them like a titan. In mere seconds, the mecha-hitler was feet away, lifting a foot to smash down onto the future king of Israel. Several spikes lined the bottom of it's foot, and the boot came down harder than my math
"OH SHI-"
Rosalie quickly grabbed Jim John's arm with her ghastly hand. He glanced over to see golden lines wrapping around her body begin to glow bright, and her eyes beamed brightly as golden particles began to surround them like beautiful fire. Then, in a flash, everything went dark.
When Jim John opened his eyes, everything was blurry, and it took time for his eyes to focus. He recognized something, noise in fact. It was noisy wherever he now was, and it sounded like the average restaurant.
"Ow-hay are-ay ou-yay eeling-fay?" Rosalie asked.
Jim John blinked, giving her a quizzical look. "What?"
Rosalie leaned in close, whispering into his ear, "There are people around us, people who would love to turn you in, or kill a king for glory. We're both disguised, and we need to speak in a language foreign to them, or else we risk being killed." Rosalie leaned back, and continued. "Ou-yay are-ay estined-day o-tay e-bay he-tay ing-kay of-ay Israel-ay...o-day ou-yay understand-ay?"...
"You realize, that Pig Latin isn't a language?" said Jim.
A couple of guys sitting at the nearby table muttered something about death.
Jim John switched to Pig Latin.
"Ine-fay. At-whay is-ay our-yay ame-nay? Ow-hay o-day ou-yay ow-knay y-may ame-nay?"
Rosalie stood up, paid for their order, and left the restaurant.
Then, in an alley, she spoke in plain English...
"Because I'm a f*cking wizard"

Jim John sighed. "Another one of those days. I am really sick of really bizarre things happening to my life.

(It's like you just stole my part...)
You're probably thinking right now "haha I'm a genius". Well you're not -Valkrin

inferno: "I don't know, are you attracted to women?"
ButterCatX: "No, Vaarka is mine!"

All hail scum Vaarka, wielder of the bastard sword, smiter of nations, destroyer of spiders -VOT

"Vaarka, I've been thinking about this for a long time now," (pulls out small box made of macaroni) "W-will you be my noodle buddy?" -Kirigaya
breakingamber
Posts: 1,422
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12/15/2015 1:17:03 AM
Posted: 11 months ago
At 12/15/2015 1:16:09 AM, Vaarka wrote:
At 12/15/2015 1:14:00 AM, breakingamber wrote:
"Sweet Gillery Crackers!" Jim John yelled, stepping to run away (of course after stabbing his shiv into the woman's throat). The mecha-hitler recognized his face, and began to charge towards them like a titan. In mere seconds, the mecha-hitler was feet away, lifting a foot to smash down onto the future king of Israel. Several spikes lined the bottom of it's foot, and the boot came down harder than my math
"OH SHI-"
Rosalie quickly grabbed Jim John's arm with her ghastly hand. He glanced over to see golden lines wrapping around her body begin to glow bright, and her eyes beamed brightly as golden particles began to surround them like beautiful fire. Then, in a flash, everything went dark.
When Jim John opened his eyes, everything was blurry, and it took time for his eyes to focus. He recognized something, noise in fact. It was noisy wherever he now was, and it sounded like the average restaurant.
"Ow-hay are-ay ou-yay eeling-fay?" Rosalie asked.
Jim John blinked, giving her a quizzical look. "What?"
Rosalie leaned in close, whispering into his ear, "There are people around us, people who would love to turn you in, or kill a king for glory. We're both disguised, and we need to speak in a language foreign to them, or else we risk being killed." Rosalie leaned back, and continued. "Ou-yay are-ay estined-day o-tay e-bay he-tay ing-kay of-ay Israel-ay...o-day ou-yay understand-ay?"...
"You realize, that Pig Latin isn't a language?" said Jim.
A couple of guys sitting at the nearby table muttered something about death.
Jim John switched to Pig Latin.
"Ine-fay. At-whay is-ay our-yay ame-nay? Ow-hay o-day ou-yay ow-knay y-may ame-nay?"
Rosalie stood up, paid for their order, and left the restaurant.
Then, in an alley, she spoke in plain English...
"Because I'm a f*cking wizard"

Jim John sighed. "Another one of those days. I am really sick of really bizarre things happening to my life.

//(It's like you just stole my part...)
//Oops sorry.
MAY THE WRATH OF THE MODS BE UPON YOU!
- Master Elodin

"When will [Obliteration] learn that Funtimes' plan of saving/destroying the world with pancakes is the only way? "
"She wouldn't even have to make real pancakes! Just the batter, and Obliteration could cook it with his powers! OBLITERATION, YOU'RE WASTING YOUR TALENTS"
- Voidus and TwiLyghtSansSparkles

"An Epic stage magician and a zombie dinosaur? She sure as Braize won"t pull the line there!"
- Edgedancer
Bob13
Posts: 710
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12/15/2015 1:27:46 AM
Posted: 11 months ago
At 12/5/2015 10:45:26 PM, Voxol wrote:
Once there was a man named
Bob. He walked into a bar. Then he realized that he was in a story and refused to anything interesting. He walks out of the bar. He walks down the street. He eats a taco. He walks home. He takes a nap. He wakes up. He eats another taco. He walks out of his house. He sits under a tree. He walks away. He eats a burrito. He walks down another street. He sits on a bench. He eats another taco. He eats another burrito. He walks farther down the street. He continues to walk. He walks some more. He keeps walking. He doesn't want to stop walking. He wants to keep walking. He refuses to stop walking. He walks even more. He likes to walk. That's why he keeps walking. He is still walking. He walks a lot more. He trips over a fallen tree. He gets up. He resumes walking. He walks 200 more feet. He walks 20 more miles. He walks 2 more inches. He eats a quesadilla. He sees how bored the audience is. He laughs at them. He takes another nap in the middle of the street. He is run over by a car. He gets struck by lightning. He falls into a sinkhole.
The End. :-)
I don't have a signature. :-)