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Funny things

fire_wings
Posts: 5,907
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2/7/2016 6:45:06 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
A first-grade teacher can"t R32;believe her student isn"t hepped up about the Super Bowl. "It"s a huge event. Why aren"t you excited?"

"Because I"m not a football fan. My parents love basketball, so I do too," says the student.

"Well, that"s a lousy reason," says the teacher. "What if your parents were morons? What would you be then?"

"Then I"d be a football fan."
fire_wings
Posts: 5,907
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2/7/2016 6:45:39 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
After football fans in Philadelphia were treated to a particularly excruciating loss earlier in the season, a man phoned a sports-radio talk-show host to say, "Everyone should call in and give one word for that game."

"What"s your word?" the host R32;replied.

"Bored out of my mind," said the caller.
fire_wings
Posts: 5,907
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2/7/2016 6:46:08 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
A Twitter exchange between an angry customer and an apologetic Domino"s Pizza:

Customer: Yoooo I ordered a Pizza R32;& Came with no Toppings on it or anything, Its Just Bread

Domino"s: We"re sorry to hear about this!

Customer (minutes later): Never mind, I opened the pizza upside down :/
fire_wings
Posts: 5,907
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2/7/2016 6:46:38 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
Scene: Horseback-riding stable.

Mom: Those horses are awfully big for my daughter.

Me: Our horses are very sweet "

Mom: Don"t you have something smaller? What about that one over there? It"s the perfect size for her!

Me: Um " that"s a goat.
brontoraptor
Posts: 11,685
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2/9/2016 2:14:44 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
Will Ferrell Sings (Stepbrothers)

http://youtu.be...

-Tom Green (We can live like kings!)
Soap on a rope

http://youtu.be...

Tom Green (woman gives birth)

http://youtu.be...
"What Donald Trump is doing is representing the absolute heartbreak, and anger, and frustration at a government gone mad."

http://youtu.be...