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Things Not To Say To Girls

Wallstreetatheist
Posts: 7,132
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9/25/2013 9:49:08 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
I want to use your vagina as a deep sea breathing apparatus.
Have you tuned your queef instrument?
I'm going to put 19 babies in your tummy.
I'm going to kill your family and fvck your dog.
Dog.
*show gifs of My Little Pony porn*
You look a little pregnant.
Your face is pretty big. Do you have downs?
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Primal Diet. Lifting. Reading. Psychedelics. Cold-Approach Pickup. Music.
Andromeda_Z
Posts: 4,151
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9/25/2013 10:18:33 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/25/2013 9:49:08 PM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:
I want to use your vagina as a deep sea breathing apparatus.
I'm going to kill your family and fvck your dog.

But... These ones are really funny...
*show gifs of My Little Pony porn*

Lol, my bf has actually done this and seeing as I still love him, I clearly don't mind...
Andromeda_Z
Posts: 4,151
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9/25/2013 10:23:01 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
My bf asked me on the first date if i had a penis and i took at as one hell of a compliment, which is how he meant it, so yeah
Maikuru
Posts: 9,112
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9/25/2013 10:35:18 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
I told my female friend yesterday that I no longer find Beyonce attractive because she has stretchmarks. She flipped out.
"You assume I wouldn't want to burn this whole place to the ground."
- lamerde

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Wallstreetatheist
Posts: 7,132
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9/26/2013 1:07:59 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/25/2013 10:23:01 PM, Andromeda_Z wrote:
My bf asked me on the first date if i had a penis and i took at as one hell of a compliment, which is how he meant it, so yeah

lolwut
1) How is that a compliment?
2) How can someone mean that question as a compliment?
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Primal Diet. Lifting. Reading. Psychedelics. Cold-Approach Pickup. Music.
Wallstreetatheist
Posts: 7,132
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9/26/2013 1:08:40 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/25/2013 10:35:18 PM, Maikuru wrote:
I told my female friend yesterday that I no longer find Beyonce attractive because she has stretchmarks. She flipped out.

I also care very deeply about who you think is attractive.
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Primal Diet. Lifting. Reading. Psychedelics. Cold-Approach Pickup. Music.
AnDoctuir
Posts: 11,060
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9/26/2013 1:16:20 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
I'm actually being sexually harassed at present. And by like 15 women on a good day.

No lie... They're all writing me love notes and blowing me kisses and everything.... crawling towards me very provocatively.... yawning right when I look their direction or past them.....you know like "look at my tits" yawning...

Like Jeez... what happened to "my eyes are up here"??

Also my pregnant teacher told me she was free for lunch. ONE of my pregnant teachers. Sociology has to be like the horniest course there is...
Wallstreetatheist
Posts: 7,132
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9/26/2013 3:46:34 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/26/2013 1:23:35 AM, AnDoctuir wrote:
I might be addicted to attention...

It's one of the symptoms of advanced-age virginity.
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Primal Diet. Lifting. Reading. Psychedelics. Cold-Approach Pickup. Music.
AnDoctuir
Posts: 11,060
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9/26/2013 5:38:08 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
Yeah, not a virgin though, so... I'd say it's more in line with my sometimes considering myself just narcisstic.
brian_eggleston
Posts: 3,347
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9/26/2013 7:31:23 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
Thing's I have actually heard men say to girls in London pubs:

"You don't sweat much for a fat bird." (bird = girl)

"Hello, love. Are you hungry? 'Coz I've got a quarter pounder with cheese in my pants you can chomp on if you like."

"'Ere, darlin', let me put you up the duff to prove I'm not a Jaffa." (Excuse me, darling, please allow me to impregnate you in order to demonstrate that I am not infertile).

The last one actually worked!
Visit the burglars' bulletin board: http://www.break-in-news.com...
MassiveDump
Posts: 3,423
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9/26/2013 8:02:22 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/25/2013 10:45:28 PM, Andromeda_Z wrote:
At 9/25/2013 9:49:08 PM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:
*show gifs of My Little Pony porn*

Also! This is called "clop"
http://www.promoboxx.com...

But we don't talk about that here.
AlbinoBunny
Posts: 3,781
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9/26/2013 9:53:17 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/26/2013 7:31:23 AM, brian_eggleston wrote:
Thing's I have actually heard men say to girls in London pubs: ...

... "'Ere, darlin', let me put you up the duff to prove I'm not a Jaffa." (Excuse me, darling, please allow me to impregnate you in order to demonstrate that I am not infertile).

The last one actually worked!
bladerunner060 | bsh1 , 2014! Presidency campaign!

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http://www.debate.org... - Running for president.
http://www.debate.org... - Running as his vice president.

May the best man win!
Mysterious_Stranger
Posts: 1,562
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9/26/2013 10:14:23 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/25/2013 10:45:28 PM, Andromeda_Z wrote:
At 9/25/2013 9:49:08 PM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:
*show gifs of My Little Pony porn*

Also! This is called "clop"
http://www.promoboxx.com...

A long time ago I went onto a site named rule 34, I returned a different man. God the crossovers... please no more...
Turn around, go back.
MassiveDump
Posts: 3,423
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9/26/2013 11:15:15 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/26/2013 10:14:23 AM, Mysterious_Stranger wrote:
At 9/25/2013 10:45:28 PM, Andromeda_Z wrote:
At 9/25/2013 9:49:08 PM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:
*show gifs of My Little Pony porn*

Also! This is called "clop"
http://www.promoboxx.com...

A long time ago I went onto a site named rule 34, I returned a different man. God the crossovers... please no more...

If you had known what rule 34 was, you would never had dare set foot on that site.

#Rule34AwarenessDay
AnDoctuir
Posts: 11,060
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9/26/2013 11:37:15 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/26/2013 11:33:54 AM, NightofTheLivingCats wrote:
You be surprised of what doesn't wake you up.

lol
lewis20
Posts: 5,093
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9/26/2013 12:03:54 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
Most stuff in this
"If you are a racist I will attack you with the north"- Abraham Lincoln

"Do not wear clothing woven of two kinds of material" - Leviticus 19 19

"War is a racket" - Smedley Butler
Mysterious_Stranger
Posts: 1,562
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9/26/2013 12:21:56 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/26/2013 11:15:15 AM, MassiveDump wrote:
At 9/26/2013 10:14:23 AM, Mysterious_Stranger wrote:
At 9/25/2013 10:45:28 PM, Andromeda_Z wrote:
At 9/25/2013 9:49:08 PM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:
*show gifs of My Little Pony porn*

Also! This is called "clop"
http://www.promoboxx.com...

A long time ago I went onto a site named rule 34, I returned a different man. God the crossovers... please no more...

If you had known what rule 34 was, you would never had dare set foot on that site.

#Rule34AwarenessDay

I had a slight idea of what it was, it was all really just speculation. We were so young back then, nothing seemed to matter to our foolish selves, it was really a way of proving yourself to each other, a question of who was the bravest, who could tolerate the most, who above all could be a man. So I did what no one else could, I sat right down one evening and opened up chrome. I still remember their reactions when I told them I was really going to do it. "You never would" "Yeah I totally believe you" Their sarcastic tones just made me crave it more, I was now finally going to prove myself. I typed the fabled address in the search bar "www.rule34.com" and sat back. It at first was not at all bad, like floating in space or taking heroin for the first time, but after about a minute I realised truly where I was. My eyes would not close, for all I tried they would just not shut as I scrolled down page after page after page. I began to lose sense, where I was, who I was, and still my eyes would not shut, it was like they were being held open by the cold dead hands of the Equestria girls. Unable to tear myself away I tried to seek solace in my mind, and doing so I found a withered decaying figure clutching a gun to his head, I asked "who are you" the figure replied "I am your childhood I have come to tell you that I am dying" I spoke into his eyes "why are you dying" I asked. "Because you have killed me!" he laughed and with one dry breath he pulled the trigger, the gunshot echoed though my mind like a tremendous thunder and with that I was able to pull myself away from the wretched screen. I then stood up, looked in the mirror and whispered to myself "I am a man"
Turn around, go back.
Andromeda_Z
Posts: 4,151
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9/26/2013 1:36:32 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/26/2013 1:07:59 AM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:
At 9/25/2013 10:23:01 PM, Andromeda_Z wrote:
My bf asked me on the first date if i had a penis and i took at as one hell of a compliment, which is how he meant it, so yeah

lolwut
1) How is that a compliment?
2) How can someone mean that question as a compliment?

We're weird people... Idk how to explain
lannan13
Posts: 23,102
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9/26/2013 4:24:06 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/26/2013 11:37:15 AM, AnDoctuir wrote:
At 9/26/2013 11:33:54 AM, NightofTheLivingCats wrote:
You be surprised of what doesn't wake you up.

lol
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"If you are going through hell, keep going." "Sir Winston Churchill

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Topics I want to debate. (http://tinyurl.com...)
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NightofTheLivingCats
Posts: 2,294
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9/29/2013 2:31:17 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/26/2013 1:36:32 PM, Andromeda_Z wrote:
At 9/26/2013 1:07:59 AM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:
At 9/25/2013 10:23:01 PM, Andromeda_Z wrote:
My bf asked me on the first date if i had a penis and i took at as one hell of a compliment, which is how he meant it, so yeah

lolwut
1) How is that a compliment?
2) How can someone mean that question as a compliment?

We're weird people... Idk how to explain

Severe Asperger's.
NightofTheLivingCats
Posts: 2,294
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9/29/2013 2:50:31 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
Walk up to a woman, softly put your hand on her tummy, smile and say "soon your womb will be full of my seed"

I used to just stare at girls

Dude. Where did the spider go?

You need to change your underwear.
Andromeda_Z
Posts: 4,151
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9/29/2013 6:10:23 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/29/2013 2:31:17 AM, NightofTheLivingCats wrote:
At 9/26/2013 1:36:32 PM, Andromeda_Z wrote:
At 9/26/2013 1:07:59 AM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:
At 9/25/2013 10:23:01 PM, Andromeda_Z wrote:
My bf asked me on the first date if i had a penis and i took at as one hell of a compliment, which is how he meant it, so yeah

lolwut
1) How is that a compliment?
2) How can someone mean that question as a compliment?

We're weird people... Idk how to explain

Severe Asperger's.

Possibly. I'm betting on mental illness based on some unrelated stuff. But my counselor hasn't had me committed yet so who knows.
cybertron1998
Posts: 5,818
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9/29/2013 6:15:37 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 9/29/2013 2:31:17 AM, NightofTheLivingCats wrote:
At 9/26/2013 1:36:32 PM, Andromeda_Z wrote:
At 9/26/2013 1:07:59 AM, Wallstreetatheist wrote:
At 9/25/2013 10:23:01 PM, Andromeda_Z wrote:
My bf asked me on the first date if i had a penis and i took at as one hell of a compliment, which is how he meant it, so yeah

lolwut
1) How is that a compliment?
2) How can someone mean that question as a compliment?

We're weird people... Idk how to explain

Severe Asperger's.

bloody hell no, just don't joke about that
Epsilon: There are so many stories where some brave hero decides to give their life to save the day, and because of their sacrifice, the good guys win, the survivors all cheer, and everybody lives happily ever after. But the hero... never gets to see that ending. They'll never know if their sacrifice actually made a difference. They'll never know if the day was really saved. In the end, they just have to have faith.