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I need advice fast.

blackhawk1331
Posts: 4,932
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6/4/2011 11:15:35 PM
Posted: 5 years ago
We have a school dance coming up this Friday. I want to ask a girl out, but I'm pretty sure she has a boyfriend out of school. You can't take anyone out of grade to the dance let alone out of school. I don't know what I should do about this situation.
Because you said it was a waste, numb nuts. - Drafter

So fvck you. :) - TV

Use prima facie correctly or not at all. - Noumena
SuperRobotWars
Posts: 3,906
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6/4/2011 11:20:52 PM
Posted: 5 years ago
If it was me, I would just stay home and troll some forums, but I advise you simply call her ahead of schedule and ask, if she has someone else you can always continue to search or simply stay home and troll some forums.
Minister Of Trolling
: At 12/6/2011 2:21:41 PM, badger wrote:
: ugly people should beat beautiful people ugly. simple! you'd be killing two birds with the one stone... women like violent men and you're making yourself more attractive, relatively. i met a blonde dude who was prettier than me not so long ago. he's not so pretty now! ha!
:
: ...and well, he wasn't really prettier than me. he just had nice hair.
CosmicAlfonzo
Posts: 5,955
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6/4/2011 11:21:40 PM
Posted: 5 years ago
Ask.

Oh no, she says no.

What do you have to lose?

Your virginity.
Official "High Priest of Secular Affairs and Transient Distributor of Sonic Apple Seeds relating to the Reptilian Division of Paperwork Immoliation" of The FREEDO Bureaucracy, a DDO branch of the Erisian Front, a subdivision of the Discordian Back, a Limb of the Illuminatian Cosmic Utensil Corp
askbob
Posts: 7,254
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6/4/2011 11:54:13 PM
Posted: 5 years ago
At 6/4/2011 11:15:35 PM, blackhawk1331 wrote:
We have a school dance coming up this Friday. I want to ask a girl out, but I'm pretty sure she has a boyfriend out of school. You can't take anyone out of grade to the dance let alone out of school. I don't know what I should do about this situation.

Step 1

Organize a group of twenty friends

Step 2

Surround her when she is weak and vulnerable and has no friends near her

Step 3

Ask her to go to the dance

Step 4

Get group of twenty friends to chant say yes while pointing at her. The volume of their voices should rise with each chant

The peer pressure will be too much for her and she'll say yes.
Me -Phil left the site in my charge. I have a recorded phone conversation to prove it.
kohai -If you're the owner, then do something useful like ip block him and get us away from juggle and on a dofferent host!
Me -haha you apparently don't know my history
Kohai - Maybe not, but that doesn't matter! You shoukd still listen to your community and quit being a tyrrant!
Me - i was being completely sarcastic
Kohai - then u misrepresented yourself by impersonating the owner—a violation of the tos
askbob
Posts: 7,254
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6/4/2011 11:59:30 PM
Posted: 5 years ago
Plan #2

Step 1
Get a group of 200 friends and spend 3 hours every day after school doing choreography to a popular pop song that is romantic and has the choreography centered around her with you as the star and your friends being the supporting dancers

Step 2

When you have the routine down during lunch in the cafeteria bring a boombox down and start playing the music while lipsyncing the lyrics and looking at her. Then start your choreography routine.

Step 3
Have 10 muscular friends keep watch for any adults attempting to interrupt the routine and have them tackle and dismember anyone who gets in your way.

Step 4
Once your friends have joined in the flashmob and the song is winding down have the music toned down to a lower volume and ask her to the dance. If she says yes throw your arms around her and kiss her in front of the entire school.

Step 5
Enjoy the thunderous applause, the inevitable sex to follow, and respect amongst your peers as the coolest cat in school.
Me -Phil left the site in my charge. I have a recorded phone conversation to prove it.
kohai -If you're the owner, then do something useful like ip block him and get us away from juggle and on a dofferent host!
Me -haha you apparently don't know my history
Kohai - Maybe not, but that doesn't matter! You shoukd still listen to your community and quit being a tyrrant!
Me - i was being completely sarcastic
Kohai - then u misrepresented yourself by impersonating the owner—a violation of the tos
askbob
Posts: 7,254
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6/5/2011 12:04:34 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
Plan #3

Step 1
Befriend her out of town boyfriend

Step 2
In the process become her best friend

Step 3
Kill off the boyfriend but make it look like a tragic car accident where you are slightly injured and break a leg

Step 4
Comfort her in her solace and pretend like you're really sad he died even though you killed him.

Step 5
Lie and say that your last girlfriend also died in a car accident then start crying

Step 6
Slowly make romantic moves on her

Step 7
Ask her to the dance and receive a yes
Me -Phil left the site in my charge. I have a recorded phone conversation to prove it.
kohai -If you're the owner, then do something useful like ip block him and get us away from juggle and on a dofferent host!
Me -haha you apparently don't know my history
Kohai - Maybe not, but that doesn't matter! You shoukd still listen to your community and quit being a tyrrant!
Me - i was being completely sarcastic
Kohai - then u misrepresented yourself by impersonating the owner—a violation of the tos
askbob
Posts: 7,254
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6/5/2011 12:07:47 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
Plan #4

Step 1
Befriend the girl

Step 2
send her a series of creepy stalker notes that you slip into her locker, bookbag, etc.

Step 3
Listen to her complaints about the stalker and offer to protect her

Step 4
Hijack the microphone on the morning announcments and say you will kill whoever is sending her those stalker notes

Step 5
Wait one week and stop sending her the notes.

Step 6
Receive the praise from her for standing up to her stalker and scaring him away

Step 7
Ask her to the dance and get a yes
Me -Phil left the site in my charge. I have a recorded phone conversation to prove it.
kohai -If you're the owner, then do something useful like ip block him and get us away from juggle and on a dofferent host!
Me -haha you apparently don't know my history
Kohai - Maybe not, but that doesn't matter! You shoukd still listen to your community and quit being a tyrrant!
Me - i was being completely sarcastic
Kohai - then u misrepresented yourself by impersonating the owner—a violation of the tos
askbob
Posts: 7,254
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6/5/2011 12:09:30 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
Plan #5

Step 1
Let out the news that you just found out you have contracted a lethal form of cancer and are not expected to live the next year

Step 2
Start skipping class once every two weeks and say you are going for chemo treatments

Step 3
Ask the girl to the dance and if she says no start crying

Step 4
Receive a yes answer
Me -Phil left the site in my charge. I have a recorded phone conversation to prove it.
kohai -If you're the owner, then do something useful like ip block him and get us away from juggle and on a dofferent host!
Me -haha you apparently don't know my history
Kohai - Maybe not, but that doesn't matter! You shoukd still listen to your community and quit being a tyrrant!
Me - i was being completely sarcastic
Kohai - then u misrepresented yourself by impersonating the owner—a violation of the tos
askbob
Posts: 7,254
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6/5/2011 12:15:49 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
Plan #6

Step 1
Find out her boyfriends email address

Step 2
Click forgot password on the email address

Step 3
Use his facebook to answer the secret questions and ask the girl about her boyfriend eventually leading into the answers to the secret questions

Step 4
Gain access to his facebook

Step 5
Befriend her boyfriend and accidentally break his cell phone by asking to see it then accidentily dropping it in some body of water.

Step 5
Photoshop photos of him with other gay boys and post it on his facebook. Also change his orientation on his facebook

Step 6
Spread the rumor that he came out of the closet while in school and show people his facebook as proof.

Step 7
Eventually the girl will break down in tears. Comfort her and tell her you will go to the dance with her.

Step 8
Receive a yes
Me -Phil left the site in my charge. I have a recorded phone conversation to prove it.
kohai -If you're the owner, then do something useful like ip block him and get us away from juggle and on a dofferent host!
Me -haha you apparently don't know my history
Kohai - Maybe not, but that doesn't matter! You shoukd still listen to your community and quit being a tyrrant!
Me - i was being completely sarcastic
Kohai - then u misrepresented yourself by impersonating the owner—a violation of the tos
askbob
Posts: 7,254
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6/5/2011 12:21:52 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
Plan #7

Step 1
Kidnap her boyfriend the night of the dance and tie him up in a locked van

Step 2
Go to the dance and watch as she has no date

Step 3
When a slow dance comes on ask her if she would like a dance

Step 4
Get a yes
Me -Phil left the site in my charge. I have a recorded phone conversation to prove it.
kohai -If you're the owner, then do something useful like ip block him and get us away from juggle and on a dofferent host!
Me -haha you apparently don't know my history
Kohai - Maybe not, but that doesn't matter! You shoukd still listen to your community and quit being a tyrrant!
Me - i was being completely sarcastic
Kohai - then u misrepresented yourself by impersonating the owner—a violation of the tos
askbob
Posts: 7,254
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6/5/2011 12:24:12 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
Plan #8

Step 1:
Compose a song about how lovely she is and why you want to go to the dance with her

Step 2:
Buy a acoustic guitar and learn how to play it

Step 3
Throw a rock at her window at night

Step four
When she opens her window whip out your guitar and start playing and singing your song at the end of the song ask her if she will go to the dance with you

Step 5
receive a yes
Me -Phil left the site in my charge. I have a recorded phone conversation to prove it.
kohai -If you're the owner, then do something useful like ip block him and get us away from juggle and on a dofferent host!
Me -haha you apparently don't know my history
Kohai - Maybe not, but that doesn't matter! You shoukd still listen to your community and quit being a tyrrant!
Me - i was being completely sarcastic
Kohai - then u misrepresented yourself by impersonating the owner—a violation of the tos
askbob
Posts: 7,254
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6/5/2011 12:26:24 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
Plan#9

Step 1
Convince her that you are suicidal and will kill yourself if she does not go to the dance with you.

Step 2
Tell her that you will also kill yourself if she tells anyone about this

Step 3
Go to the dance with her while guilt tripping her with your death the whole time.
Me -Phil left the site in my charge. I have a recorded phone conversation to prove it.
kohai -If you're the owner, then do something useful like ip block him and get us away from juggle and on a dofferent host!
Me -haha you apparently don't know my history
Kohai - Maybe not, but that doesn't matter! You shoukd still listen to your community and quit being a tyrrant!
Me - i was being completely sarcastic
Kohai - then u misrepresented yourself by impersonating the owner—a violation of the tos
askbob
Posts: 7,254
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6/5/2011 12:29:29 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
Plan #10

Step 1
Find the most handsome boy in school

Step 2
Write a bunch of poetry for the girl

Step 3
Pay the handsome boy a few hundred dollars to accompany you at night for 3 nights to her house

Step 4
Throw a rock on her window

Step 5
Hide in the bushes

Step 6
Whisper the handsome boy the poetry so he can read it to the girl

Step 7
Allow her to fall in love with the handsome boy

Step 8
Reveal you wrote the poetry and have her fall for you

Step 9
Ask her to the dance

Step 10
Receive a yes
Me -Phil left the site in my charge. I have a recorded phone conversation to prove it.
kohai -If you're the owner, then do something useful like ip block him and get us away from juggle and on a dofferent host!
Me -haha you apparently don't know my history
Kohai - Maybe not, but that doesn't matter! You shoukd still listen to your community and quit being a tyrrant!
Me - i was being completely sarcastic
Kohai - then u misrepresented yourself by impersonating the owner—a violation of the tos
askbob
Posts: 7,254
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6/5/2011 12:30:16 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
That's all the advice I have for tonight.
Me -Phil left the site in my charge. I have a recorded phone conversation to prove it.
kohai -If you're the owner, then do something useful like ip block him and get us away from juggle and on a dofferent host!
Me -haha you apparently don't know my history
Kohai - Maybe not, but that doesn't matter! You shoukd still listen to your community and quit being a tyrrant!
Me - i was being completely sarcastic
Kohai - then u misrepresented yourself by impersonating the owner—a violation of the tos
J.Kenyon
Posts: 4,194
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6/5/2011 12:42:52 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
At 6/5/2011 12:30:16 AM, askbob wrote:
That's all the advice I have for tonight.

I bet you got a lot of girls in high school through the aforementioned methods.
Grape
Posts: 989
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6/5/2011 12:44:55 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
At 6/4/2011 11:15:35 PM, blackhawk1331 wrote:
We have a school dance coming up this Friday. I want to ask a girl out, but I'm pretty sure she has a boyfriend out of school. You can't take anyone out of grade to the dance let alone out of school. I don't know what I should do about this situation.

My advice: ask her via text message at 12:30 AM a few days before the dance. In my experience, it works 100% of the time.
askbob
Posts: 7,254
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6/5/2011 12:54:56 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
At 6/5/2011 12:42:52 AM, J.Kenyon wrote:
At 6/5/2011 12:30:16 AM, askbob wrote:
That's all the advice I have for tonight.

I bet you got a lot of girls in high school through the aforementioned methods.

you have no idea.
Me -Phil left the site in my charge. I have a recorded phone conversation to prove it.
kohai -If you're the owner, then do something useful like ip block him and get us away from juggle and on a dofferent host!
Me -haha you apparently don't know my history
Kohai - Maybe not, but that doesn't matter! You shoukd still listen to your community and quit being a tyrrant!
Me - i was being completely sarcastic
Kohai - then u misrepresented yourself by impersonating the owner—a violation of the tos
PoeJoe
Posts: 3,822
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6/5/2011 3:13:40 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
At 6/5/2011 12:24:12 AM, askbob wrote:
Plan #8

Step 1:
Compose a song about how lovely she is and why you want to go to the dance with her

Step 2:
Buy a acoustic guitar and learn how to play it

Step 3
Throw a rock at her window at night

Step four
When she opens her window whip out your guitar and start playing and singing your song at the end of the song ask her if she will go to the dance with you

Step 5
receive a yes

That didn't work for me.
Television Rot: http://tvrot.com...
PoeJoe
Posts: 3,822
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6/5/2011 3:17:46 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
At 6/5/2011 3:13:40 AM, PoeJoe wrote:
At 6/5/2011 12:24:12 AM, askbob wrote:
Plan #8

Step 1:
Compose a song about how lovely she is and why you want to go to the dance with her

Step 2:
Buy a acoustic guitar and learn how to play it

Step 3
Throw a rock at her window at night

Step four
When she opens her window whip out your guitar and start playing and singing your song at the end of the song ask her if she will go to the dance with you

Step 5
receive a yes

That didn't work for me.

For sure, I did it one time--and it worked.

The second time, though... it was more complicated. Like, it was all part of a deal where I'd serenade her if she posted a video of her dancing on YouTube. (It was a part of a really complicated, convoluted conversation we had.) Anyway, she thought I agreed to the deal platonically, which, also considering the way she consistently flirted with me, was... whatever.
Television Rot: http://tvrot.com...
Phoenix_Reaper
Posts: 318
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6/5/2011 7:33:54 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
At 6/4/2011 11:21:40 PM, CosmicAlfonzo wrote:
Ask.

Oh no, she says no.

What do you have to lose?

Your virginity.
Phoenix Reaper - To rise from the ashes of defeat and claim your soul.

: At 3/15/2011 4:23:07 PM, J.Kenyon wrote:
: Taste is for pussïes. Be a nihilist. Drink vodka.
MarquisX
Posts: 925
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6/5/2011 10:49:12 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
I asked my wife out at gun point, and we're still together 4 years later. it works
Sophisticated ignorance, write my curses in cursive
Rockylightning
Posts: 2,862
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6/5/2011 11:31:38 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
At 6/5/2011 10:49:12 AM, MarquisX wrote:
I asked my wife out at gun point, and we're still together 4 years later. it works

hahahaha this
askbob
Posts: 7,254
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6/5/2011 12:33:33 PM
Posted: 5 years ago
At 6/5/2011 12:21:21 PM, Koopin wrote:
I need cash quick. Askbob, please help!
Me -Phil left the site in my charge. I have a recorded phone conversation to prove it.
kohai -If you're the owner, then do something useful like ip block him and get us away from juggle and on a dofferent host!
Me -haha you apparently don't know my history
Kohai - Maybe not, but that doesn't matter! You shoukd still listen to your community and quit being a tyrrant!
Me - i was being completely sarcastic
Kohai - then u misrepresented yourself by impersonating the owner—a violation of the tos
askbob
Posts: 7,254
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6/6/2011 6:13:35 PM
Posted: 5 years ago
I'm still upset he didn't like my advice.
Me -Phil left the site in my charge. I have a recorded phone conversation to prove it.
kohai -If you're the owner, then do something useful like ip block him and get us away from juggle and on a dofferent host!
Me -haha you apparently don't know my history
Kohai - Maybe not, but that doesn't matter! You shoukd still listen to your community and quit being a tyrrant!
Me - i was being completely sarcastic
Kohai - then u misrepresented yourself by impersonating the owner—a violation of the tos
Charles0103
Posts: 523
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6/7/2011 11:57:23 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
At 6/4/2011 11:15:35 PM, blackhawk1331 wrote:
We have a school dance coming up this Friday. I want to ask a girl out, but I'm pretty sure she has a boyfriend out of school. You can't take anyone out of grade to the dance let alone out of school. I don't know what I should do about this situation.

You're in luck, blackhawk. Because I am the loooooove docter!

I was in a situation like that once... You can do three things.

1. Talk to the girl for a few days. Be a really good friend. Flirt a little. The night before the dance (not too late just in case she has an early bed time and misses your text. I suggest around 8 or 9 o'clock), text her (unless you've called her before. But if you haven't, text her because talking too her on the phone is too awkward) and ask her out. She might say yes, she might not. It depends.

2. Get another girl.

3. Don't go to the dance. Stay home and live a life of never knowing love.

And that is your prescription from the love doctor. :D
"And so I tell you, keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened." Jesus in Luke 11:9-10
lannan13
Posts: 23,078
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6/16/2015 12:20:37 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 6/16/2015 10:24:25 AM, Humanities wrote:
i am really really nervous to ask out this girl cause im scared she might say no

If you're always scared that she'd say no then you'd never get a guy in your life. If she'd say no then you can move on in life to the next girl.
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"If you are going through hell, keep going." "Sir Winston Churchill

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." "Eleanor Roosevelt

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