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Irritation at work and how to deal

CrimsonTokala
Posts: 61
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11/4/2011 6:01:37 PM
Posted: 5 years ago
I'm having a lot of issues at work lately. I'm stuck with idiot co-workers, bosses who think they're masters of the universe and rude customers. I get crap from some of them because I don't party and smoke pot. Some of them crack jokes and are downright horrid to me for my faith. I know this sounds like i'm just whining and complaining but i'm putting up with this every day and I really needed to vent and get some ideas how to deal with them. They're making me want to smack my head into a wall.
CosmicAlfonzo
Posts: 5,955
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11/4/2011 6:18:24 PM
Posted: 5 years ago
y so srs?
Official "High Priest of Secular Affairs and Transient Distributor of Sonic Apple Seeds relating to the Reptilian Division of Paperwork Immoliation" of The FREEDO Bureaucracy, a DDO branch of the Erisian Front, a subdivision of the Discordian Back, a Limb of the Illuminatian Cosmic Utensil Corp
Cerebral_Narcissist
Posts: 10,806
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11/4/2011 7:11:47 PM
Posted: 5 years ago
Your co-workers will always be idiots and your bosses will always be little hitlers and the customers will always be rude. You can't change these factors.

However what you are describing is bullying. There are two reasons why people are bullied, firstly that they are jerks... or perceived to be, secondly that they are weak.

You say they attack your faith, why is your even on the table to be attacked? Do you go out of your way to make it a subject, in which case you are being a jerk.

In the latter case when they attack you how do you respond... do you get upset? In which case you are giving them power over you. People take what they give you. If you are weak they will walk on you.

You have a few options, some wont work depending on your exact situation or who you are.
1: Make yourself less of a target.
2: Ignore negative comments.
3: Treat it as banter, laugh loudly and insult them back.
4: Get aggressive.
5: Invoke authority. Go to the manager, not a manager, the manager (or union rep). Make a formal complaint/threaten to sue for religious hatred.

All these approaches may backfire, it depends on the dynamics. Even if option five backfires it will likely result in a pay out if you are willing and able to go through with it.
I am voting for Innomen because of his intelligence, common sense, humility and the fact that Juggle appears to listen to him. Any other Presidential style would have a large sub-section of the site up in arms. If I was President I would destroy the site though elitism, others would let it run riot. Innomen represents a middle way that works, neither draconian nor anarchic and that is the only way things can work. Plus he does it all without ego trips.
CrimsonTokala
Posts: 61
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11/4/2011 9:38:45 PM
Posted: 5 years ago
At 11/4/2011 7:11:47 PM, Cerebral_Narcissist wrote:
Your co-workers will always be idiots and your bosses will always be little hitlers and the customers will always be rude. You can't change these factors.

: However what you are describing is bullying. There are two reasons why people are bullied, firstly that they are jerks... or perceived to be, secondly that they are weak.
They think i'm weak because i'm female. They've told me this.

: You say they attack your faith, why is your even on the table to be attacked? Do you go out of your way to make it a subject, in which case you are being a jerk.

I drive a Blazer with a decal that says "Jesus For Life" with a cross in the middle of it, so now all I hear are the zombie jew jokes. I've never brought it up to them personally.
: In the latter case when they attack you how do you respond... do you get upset? In which case you are giving them power over you. People take what they give you. If you are weak they will walk on you.

I did get upset, very much so, and they left me alone. For a day or so.
: You have a few options, some wont work depending on your exact situation or who you are.
1: Make yourself less of a target.
2: Ignore negative comments.
3: Treat it as banter, laugh loudly and insult them back.
4: Get aggressive.
5: Invoke authority. Go to the manager, not a manager, the manager (or union rep). Make a formal complaint/threaten to sue for religious hatred.

All these approaches may backfire, it depends on the dynamics. Even if option five backfires it will likely result in a pay out if you are willing and able to go through with it.

Thanks...ya took the time to give some great answers...I think with these people numbers three and four would work best...
CrimsonTokala
Posts: 61
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11/4/2011 9:40:49 PM
Posted: 5 years ago
: At 11/4/2011 6:18:24 PM, CosmicAlfonzo wrote:
y so srs?

Because it's my job that I depend on to pay my bills and these kids make it really hard to do it...but I might be worrying to much about it...
Wnope
Posts: 6,924
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11/8/2011 3:33:09 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
At 11/4/2011 9:40:49 PM, CrimsonTokala wrote:
: At 11/4/2011 6:18:24 PM, CosmicAlfonzo wrote:
y so srs?

Because it's my job that I depend on to pay my bills and these kids make it really hard to do it...but I might be worrying to much about it...

You are the butt of jokes either because your co-workers want to take the pressure off themselves and focus their negative attitudes towards some outside source (the usual reason you get that black sheep in most groups), because they get a rise out of you (which it sounds like isn't the case), because they artificially bond over shared "enemies" (another common cause of mass bullying), because they found you intimidating or perhaps reminding them of their own faults (one reason alcoholics make so much fun of squares is so they can pretend their behavior is justifiable), or because they compensate for feeling socially insecure by aiming others persecutory tendencies towards an outsider. The other option is that they misinterpret your reaction and think you don't mind the jokes or are too insensitive to care how their comments affect you.

The common thread here is that this is THEIR problem. Keep that in mind. When they treat you badly, they are reflecting personal defects and insecurities.

It's not a solution, but it helps put things in perspective when you feel people ganging up on you.
CosmicAlfonzo
Posts: 5,955
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11/8/2011 4:04:50 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
My god you are overly analytic.

And the OP cares too much.

Just let a part of you die, things will be easier.
Official "High Priest of Secular Affairs and Transient Distributor of Sonic Apple Seeds relating to the Reptilian Division of Paperwork Immoliation" of The FREEDO Bureaucracy, a DDO branch of the Erisian Front, a subdivision of the Discordian Back, a Limb of the Illuminatian Cosmic Utensil Corp
CosmicAlfonzo
Posts: 5,955
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11/8/2011 4:05:50 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
And no, this is the OP's problem.

Never blame someone else for your own inability to stop giving a fvck.
Official "High Priest of Secular Affairs and Transient Distributor of Sonic Apple Seeds relating to the Reptilian Division of Paperwork Immoliation" of The FREEDO Bureaucracy, a DDO branch of the Erisian Front, a subdivision of the Discordian Back, a Limb of the Illuminatian Cosmic Utensil Corp
innomen
Posts: 10,052
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11/10/2011 3:22:14 PM
Posted: 5 years ago
Cosmic is correct in this, you cannot care so much, or at all. I never care if people like me or talk about me, it's really none of my business, and as long as i am able to function fully, it isn't my problem.
CrimsonTokala
Posts: 61
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11/10/2011 10:53:02 PM
Posted: 5 years ago
: At 11/8/2011 10:29:35 AM, Mirza wrote:
At 11/4/2011 6:01:37 PM, CrimsonTokala wrote:
I don't party and smoke pot.
Hello and nice to meet you!

Hello!

And I fixed this whole mess...finally. So no more work drama....
Veridas
Posts: 733
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11/11/2011 5:24:30 AM
Posted: 5 years ago
At 11/4/2011 6:01:37 PM, CrimsonTokala wrote:
I'm having a lot of issues at work lately. I'm stuck with idiot co-workers, bosses who think they're masters of the universe and rude customers. I get crap from some of them because I don't party and smoke pot. Some of them crack jokes and are downright horrid to me for my faith. I know this sounds like i'm just whining and complaining but i'm putting up with this every day and I really needed to vent and get some ideas how to deal with them. They're making me want to smack my head into a wall.

I find a shotgun, a shovel and twelve acres of land does just the trick.
What fresh dickery is the internet up to today?