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Depression Getting Worse

THEVIRUS
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2/16/2013 7:33:58 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
Goldberg's depression test

You have reached level 34 on the Goldberg scale.

0 - 9 Depression unlikely 21 - 35 Minor to moderate depression
10 - 17 Possibly minor depression 36 - 53 Moderate to severe depression
18 - 21 On the verge of depression 54+ Severe depression

You are having suicidal thoughts. This is a serious warning sign, and you must seek help quickly.

You have the symptoms of depression. These symptoms seem to cause a considerable amount of problems in your everyday life, and it would be advisable to consult a doctor.

Depression is a disease like any other disease, and it can be treated very effectively. Recognising that you are suffering from depression is the first positive step. If you are depressed, you should arrange to see your doctor to talk about the illness right away. You may also want to raise the issue with your friends and family. You should look for support from these people you until you get well. Anyone can suffer from depression, and the symptoms can vary from person to person. Treatments, including medication and psychotherapy, have a very high success rate.

This was my "score". Slightly surprised. It isn't that I don't find worth in life, it is more as if the rules prohibit the few things I enjoy. And being 14 doesn't help. My parents keep a hold on these restrictions tighter than need be and I feel like I'm stuck in a cage. Not quite to suicide, but already have plans set up to run away if things get worse and when I turn 16 I think I might just get in the car and drive for a long, long time. I feel like it's getting worse, and need more stability. Any ideas?
"So you want me to go to the judge with 'unit, corps, God, country'?" - A Few Good Men

"And the hits just keep on comin'." -A Few Good Men
SovereignDream
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2/16/2013 7:42:26 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
What the hell could be so wrong in your life at 14 to make you want to run away, kill yourself, or be "depressed"? Honestly, my first reaction when I hear somebody say that they're "depressed" is to tell them to grow some balls and get over such an often very silly "depression".
THEVIRUS
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2/16/2013 7:52:51 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 7:42:26 PM, SovereignDream wrote:
What the hell could be so wrong in your life at 14 to make you want to run away, kill yourself, or be "depressed"? Honestly, my first reaction when I hear somebody say that they're "depressed" is to tell them to grow some balls and get over such an often very silly "depression".

I am a different religion, forced to do pointless stuff because they think what I want to do is pointless, can't go to a friends house because all my homework isn't done on day 1 of a 5 day weekend, and all my thoughts and feelings have no outlet except... my family or the friends I can't see or the pastor at the church I don't want to be at. Plus I am in all honors classes and have 3 hours of homework every night and when I want to do my own thing I have to stay up until my parents are asleep to do it (midnight) and there's more that I really am not in the time slot to include. the stress of all that and all that in general is why I'm slightly depressed
"So you want me to go to the judge with 'unit, corps, God, country'?" - A Few Good Men

"And the hits just keep on comin'." -A Few Good Men
TheElderScroll
Posts: 643
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2/16/2013 7:56:10 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 7:33:58 PM, THEVIRUS wrote:
Goldberg's depression test


You have reached level 34 on the Goldberg scale.


0 - 9 Depression unlikely 21 - 35 Minor to moderate depression
10 - 17 Possibly minor depression 36 - 53 Moderate to severe depression
18 - 21 On the verge of depression 54+ Severe depression



You are having suicidal thoughts. This is a serious warning sign, and you must seek help quickly.



You have the symptoms of depression. These symptoms seem to cause a considerable amount of problems in your everyday life, and it would be advisable to consult a doctor.

Depression is a disease like any other disease, and it can be treated very effectively. Recognising that you are suffering from depression is the first positive step. If you are depressed, you should arrange to see your doctor to talk about the illness right away. You may also want to raise the issue with your friends and family. You should look for support from these people you until you get well. Anyone can suffer from depression, and the symptoms can vary from person to person. Treatments, including medication and psychotherapy, have a very high success rate.

This was my "score". Slightly surprised. It isn't that I don't find worth in life, it is more as if the rules prohibit the few things I enjoy. And being 14 doesn't help. My parents keep a hold on these restrictions tighter than need be and I feel like I'm stuck in a cage. Not quite to suicide, but already have plans set up to run away if things get worse and when I turn 16 I think I might just get in the car and drive for a long, long time. I feel like it's getting worse, and need more stability. Any ideas?

You feel helpless, beleaguered, and despondent. What troubles you? Why do your parents prevent you from doing something that you desire?
darkkermit
Posts: 11,204
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2/16/2013 8:06:40 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 7:42:26 PM, SovereignDream wrote:
What the hell could be so wrong in your life at 14 to make you want to run away, kill yourself, or be "depressed"? Honestly, my first reaction when I hear somebody say that they're "depressed" is to tell them to grow some balls and get over such an often very silly "depression".

Do you remember what it was like to be 14? I wouldn't exactly call it an awesome time, especially for different people.
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THEVIRUS
Posts: 1,321
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2/16/2013 8:08:19 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 7:56:10 PM, TheElderScroll wrote:
At 2/16/2013 7:33:58 PM, THEVIRUS wrote:
Goldberg's depression test


You have reached level 34 on the Goldberg scale.


0 - 9 Depression unlikely 21 - 35 Minor to moderate depression
10 - 17 Possibly minor depression 36 - 53 Moderate to severe depression
18 - 21 On the verge of depression 54+ Severe depression



You are having suicidal thoughts. This is a serious warning sign, and you must seek help quickly.



You have the symptoms of depression. These symptoms seem to cause a considerable amount of problems in your everyday life, and it would be advisable to consult a doctor.

Depression is a disease like any other disease, and it can be treated very effectively. Recognising that you are suffering from depression is the first positive step. If you are depressed, you should arrange to see your doctor to talk about the illness right away. You may also want to raise the issue with your friends and family. You should look for support from these people you until you get well. Anyone can suffer from depression, and the symptoms can vary from person to person. Treatments, including medication and psychotherapy, have a very high success rate.

This was my "score". Slightly surprised. It isn't that I don't find worth in life, it is more as if the rules prohibit the few things I enjoy. And being 14 doesn't help. My parents keep a hold on these restrictions tighter than need be and I feel like I'm stuck in a cage. Not quite to suicide, but already have plans set up to run away if things get worse and when I turn 16 I think I might just get in the car and drive for a long, long time. I feel like it's getting worse, and need more stability. Any ideas?

You feel helpless, beleaguered, and despondent. What troubles you? Why do your parents prevent you from doing something that you desire?

imagine everything you love in life and imagine yourself in jail with those things right outside your cell. every once and a while you can go out, or enjoy one of those hobbies while slaving outside in the yard, but any time you try to be or express yourself it is either reprimanded or punished or quenched.

to be exact the thing I pleasure most is probably gaming, and dream of working for 343i. It is probably the thing that keeps me going but also the thing most hated by my parents.
"So you want me to go to the judge with 'unit, corps, God, country'?" - A Few Good Men

"And the hits just keep on comin'." -A Few Good Men
SovereignDream
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2/16/2013 8:10:18 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 7:52:51 PM, THEVIRUS wrote:
At 2/16/2013 7:42:26 PM, SovereignDream wrote:
What the hell could be so wrong in your life at 14 to make you want to run away, kill yourself, or be "depressed"? Honestly, my first reaction when I hear somebody say that they're "depressed" is to tell them to grow some balls and get over such an often very silly "depression".

I am a different religion, forced to do pointless stuff because they think what I want to do is pointless, can't go to a friends house because all my homework isn't done on day 1 of a 5 day weekend, and all my thoughts and feelings have no outlet except... my family or the friends I can't see or the pastor at the church I don't want to be at. Plus I am in all honors classes and have 3 hours of homework every night and when I want to do my own thing I have to stay up until my parents are asleep to do it (midnight) and there's more that I really am not in the time slot to include. the stress of all that and all that in general is why I'm slightly depressed

All you'll get from me is a big "boo hoo". I was expecting to hear something one could actually be depressed about. Like a terminal illness, the death of a loved one, etc., etc. All the problems you list are just so rudimentary and banal that I can't help but feel that you're just grossly overreacting. How about you talk to your parents and tell them how you're really feeling at the moment. Respectfully, of course. Just tell them what's on your mind and figure out what to do from there. So you have a lot of homework and you can't see your friend on the weekend. That sucks, sure. But you're gonna run away from home for that? Seriously? What's that gonna result in? Just think about it. You'll "run away," convincing everyone in your school and family that you're just some attention-wanting emo kid who does not have the willpower to talk things through like an adult with his parents and people he cares about. And then, after a day or two of "running away," you'll just come back and return to your regular routine, except now with a rockier relationship with your parents. They probably won't trust you much from then on and you'd just be worsening your relationship with them over 5 minutes of lame fame.

What's the other option you mention? Oh ya - suicide. Just think about how silly that is on the face of it: some 14 year old kid offed himself because he had a lot of homework and because he didn't have the cajones to talk with his parents about what dissatisfies him. Boo hoo. Maybe if you were a Syrian father who had to watch his wife's and children's bodies strewn on the road after an artillery strike would I pity you and at least understand the motivation to kill yourself, but some homework and silly problems? Come on, kid. You're 14 for Christ's sake! I wonder how many times you will fluctuate on your atheism throughout your allegedly "unbearable" life if you dared to live it. You have, if you would allow it, some 70-80 years of love, adventure, and experiencing joys of life to look forward to, to see what the future holds for humanity, to visit other countries foreign to you, to meet new people, to build relationships, to enjoy hobbies, to find your talent, to develop your skills, to get a job, to find a wife, to see what your future holds, to attain knowledge, etc., etc., etc., etc.! Why the hell waste it?!
THEVIRUS
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2/16/2013 8:18:14 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 8:10:18 PM, SovereignDream wrote:
At 2/16/2013 7:52:51 PM, THEVIRUS wrote:
At 2/16/2013 7:42:26 PM, SovereignDream wrote:
What the hell could be so wrong in your life at 14 to make you want to run away, kill yourself, or be "depressed"? Honestly, my first reaction when I hear somebody say that they're "depressed" is to tell them to grow some balls and get over such an often very silly "depression".

I am a different religion, forced to do pointless stuff because they think what I want to do is pointless, can't go to a friends house because all my homework isn't done on day 1 of a 5 day weekend, and all my thoughts and feelings have no outlet except... my family or the friends I can't see or the pastor at the church I don't want to be at. Plus I am in all honors classes and have 3 hours of homework every night and when I want to do my own thing I have to stay up until my parents are asleep to do it (midnight) and there's more that I really am not in the time slot to include. the stress of all that and all that in general is why I'm slightly depressed

All you'll get from me is a big "boo hoo". I was expecting to hear something one could actually be depressed about. Like a terminal illness, the death of a loved one, etc., etc. All the problems you list are just so rudimentary and banal that I can't help but feel that you're just grossly overreacting. How about you talk to your parents and tell them how you're really feeling at the moment. Respectfully, of course. Just tell them what's on your mind and figure out what to do from there. So you have a lot of homework and you can't see your friend on the weekend. That sucks, sure. But you're gonna run away from home for that? Seriously? What's that gonna result in? Just think about it. You'll "run away," convincing everyone in your school and family that you're just some attention-wanting emo kid who does not have the willpower to talk things through like an adult with his parents and people he cares about. And then, after a day or two of "running away," you'll just come back and return to your regular routine, except now with a rockier relationship with your parents. They probably won't trust you much from then on and you'd just be worsening your relationship with them over 5 minutes of lame fame.

What's the other option you mention? Oh ya - suicide. Just think about how silly that is on the face of it: some 14 year old kid offed himself because he had a lot of homework and because he didn't have the cajones to talk with his parents about what dissatisfies him. Boo hoo. Maybe if you were a Syrian father who had to watch his wife's and children's bodies strewn on the road after an artillery strike would I pity you and at least understand the motivation to kill yourself, but some homework and silly problems? Come on, kid. You're 14 for Christ's sake! I wonder how many times you will fluctuate on your atheism throughout your allegedly "unbearable" life if you dared to live it. You have, if you would allow it, some 70-80 years of love, adventure, and experiencing joys of life to look forward to, to see what the future holds for humanity, to visit other countries foreign to you, to meet new people, to build relationships, to enjoy hobbies, to find your talent, to develop your skills, to get a job, to find a wife, to see what your future holds, to attain knowledge, etc., etc., etc., etc.! Why the hell waste it?!

I don't doubt that it gets better. I am actually excited for college and life past that. I just don't know how to make it that far.

Go in your backyard and make a circle. every once and a while after being stuck inside of it you can break out of it, but are soon pulled back in. everything you love is outside the boundaries.

And maybe I am too wimpy to talk to my parents, but if you knew my parents you'd know there is a 50/50 chance it gets worse. I am not willing to take that risk, because though life sucks it is just barely manageable
"So you want me to go to the judge with 'unit, corps, God, country'?" - A Few Good Men

"And the hits just keep on comin'." -A Few Good Men
SovereignDream
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2/16/2013 8:26:22 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 8:18:14 PM, THEVIRUS wrote:
I don't doubt that it gets better. I am actually excited for college and life past that. I just don't know how to make it that far.

What do you mean "you don't know how to make it that far"?! Here's some advice: how about "don't kill yourself"? Because barring suicide, I highly doubt some 14 year old kid in a first world country is apt to die from starvation or from a militia strike, etc. Again, you're 14! If you think that at 14 you are in a position to deem your life not worthy of continuing living, you're likely self deluded.

Go in your backyard and make a circle. every once and a while after being stuck inside of it you can break out of it, but are soon pulled back in. everything you love is outside the boundaries.

God, that is so cheesy. It sounds like something you just repeat to yourself in order to pity yourself. Start finding some things to like inside that "circle" or grow the balls to talk to the people who have placed it upon you.

And maybe I am too wimpy to talk to my parents, but if you knew my parents you'd know there is a 50/50 chance it gets worse. I am not willing to take that risk, because though life sucks it is just barely manageable
Kinesis
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2/16/2013 8:26:56 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 7:42:26 PM, SovereignDream wrote:
What the hell could be so wrong in your life at 14 to make you want to run away, kill yourself, or be "depressed"? Honestly, my first reaction when I hear somebody say that they're "depressed" is to tell them to grow some balls and get over such an often very silly "depression".

"Depression is more than simply feeling unhappy or fed up for a few days.
We all go through spells of feeling down, but when you're depressed you feel persistently sad for weeks or months, rather than just a few days.
Some people still think that depression is trivial and not a genuine health condition. They're wrong. Depression is a real illness with real symptoms, and it's not a sign of weakness or something you can "snap out of" by "pulling yourself together"."

"People with a family history of depression are also more likely to experience it themselves.
But you can also become depressed for no obvious reason.
Depression is quite common and affects about one in 10 of us at some point. It affects men and women, young and old.
Depression can also strike children. Studies have shown that about 4% of children aged five to 16 in the UK are affected by depression."

http://www.nhs.uk...

Furthermore, read this page on the causes of depression: http://www.nhs.uk.... Bad events/situations are far from the only cause of depression.
THEVIRUS
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2/16/2013 8:36:16 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 8:26:22 PM, SovereignDream wrote:
At 2/16/2013 8:18:14 PM, THEVIRUS wrote:
I don't doubt that it gets better. I am actually excited for college and life past that. I just don't know how to make it that far.

What do you mean "you don't know how to make it that far"?! Here's some advice: how about "don't kill yourself"? Because barring suicide, I highly doubt some 14 year old kid in a first world country is apt to die from starvation or from a militia strike, etc. Again, you're 14! If you think that at 14 you are in a position to deem your life not worthy of continuing living, you're likely self deluded.

I wouldn't be the first, and suicide was too strong a word for my current position. I meant that if things continually get worse. I also left out (as stated earlier) the fact that I have people at school who put me in headlocks, choke me, and hold me against a wall when I try to do something - basically bullying, but they do something to make it up before they continue. So school isn't just homework and teachers.

Go in your backyard and make a circle. every once and a while after being stuck inside of it you can break out of it, but are soon pulled back in. everything you love is outside the boundaries.

God, that is so cheesy. It sounds like something you just repeat to yourself in order to pity yourself. Start finding some things to like inside that "circle" or grow the balls to talk to the people who have placed it upon you.

If it is I thought it up on consideration and repeat things like this to myself thinking "just make it out... not too much longer." I don't mean to sound cheesy but am trying to put into perspective/analogy how I feel. If you don't think I really feel this way, how about some pointers besides "grow some balls"?

And maybe I am too wimpy to talk to my parents, but if you knew my parents you'd know there is a 50/50 chance it gets worse. I am not willing to take that risk, because though life sucks it is just barely manageable
"So you want me to go to the judge with 'unit, corps, God, country'?" - A Few Good Men

"And the hits just keep on comin'." -A Few Good Men
THEVIRUS
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2/16/2013 8:39:07 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 8:26:56 PM, Kinesis wrote:
At 2/16/2013 7:42:26 PM, SovereignDream wrote:
What the hell could be so wrong in your life at 14 to make you want to run away, kill yourself, or be "depressed"? Honestly, my first reaction when I hear somebody say that they're "depressed" is to tell them to grow some balls and get over such an often very silly "depression".

"Depression is more than simply feeling unhappy or fed up for a few days.
We all go through spells of feeling down, but when you're depressed you feel persistently sad for weeks or months, rather than just a few days.
Some people still think that depression is trivial and not a genuine health condition. They're wrong. Depression is a real illness with real symptoms, and it's not a sign of weakness or something you can "snap out of" by "pulling yourself together"."

"People with a family history of depression are also more likely to experience it themselves.
But you can also become depressed for no obvious reason.
Depression is quite common and affects about one in 10 of us at some point. It affects men and women, young and old.
Depression can also strike children. Studies have shown that about 4% of children aged five to 16 in the UK are affected by depression."

http://www.nhs.uk...

Furthermore, read this page on the causes of depression: http://www.nhs.uk.... Bad events/situations are far from the only cause of depression.

this has gone on since about 13 and a half (Summer and more in September when school started)
"So you want me to go to the judge with 'unit, corps, God, country'?" - A Few Good Men

"And the hits just keep on comin'." -A Few Good Men
Kinesis
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2/16/2013 8:43:20 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
My advice: do something progressive. Something you can learn to be better at every day. So learn a language, learn to cook, go to a martial arts class or something like that. Something you can be proud of doing. Once you think you can do something worthwhile, you won't want to end yourself. Don't just do things you enjoy, do things that you can enjoy in the future too. Then you'll look forward to what the future holds. Also, exercise. The rush of endorphins after a good session will make you feel great.
Kinesis
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2/16/2013 8:46:41 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
If it's really bad, then seriously see a psychologist. It's not worth killing yourself at this age, but if you can't help your feelings you should see a professional to help you work through it.
THEVIRUS
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2/16/2013 8:52:49 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 8:43:20 PM, Kinesis wrote:
My advice: do something progressive. Something you can learn to be better at every day. So learn a language, learn to cook, go to a martial arts class or something like that. Something you can be proud of doing. Once you think you can do something worthwhile, you won't want to end yourself. Don't just do things you enjoy, do things that you can enjoy in the future too. Then you'll look forward to what the future holds. Also, exercise. The rush of endorphins after a good session will make you feel great.

I have tried some things, but some of them are extra stress. I know they will help in the future, but some days I just come home and fall asleep (at 3 o'clock) and wake up for school the next morning to find out that while sleeping I missed out on something I would enjoy. A bad circumstance?
"So you want me to go to the judge with 'unit, corps, God, country'?" - A Few Good Men

"And the hits just keep on comin'." -A Few Good Men
natoast
Posts: 204
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2/16/2013 10:28:05 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 7:42:26 PM, SovereignDream wrote:
What the hell could be so wrong in your life at 14 to make you want to run away, kill yourself, or be "depressed"? Honestly, my first reaction when I hear somebody say that they're "depressed" is to tell them to grow some balls and get over such an often very silly "depression".

At 2/16/2013 7:42:26 PM, SovereignDream wrote:
What the hell could be so wrong in your life at 14 to make you want to run away, kill yourself, or be "depressed"? Honestly, my first reaction when I hear somebody say that they're "depressed" is to tell them to grow some balls and get over such an often very silly "depression".

Jesus man, what's your problem? Depression is relative. Just because his problems wouldn't make you depressed doesn't mean that suddenly he has no right to be. Wait until you've been depressed to judge someone for it. Also, it's mostly a result of chemicals anyways.
As for my advice to you Virus, I would say you should just stop thinking about it all. Just go with whatever happens and don't consider the future and stop trying to analyze every little detail. Keep your mind as blank as possible until it passes, which it will. It worked for me.
THEVIRUS
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2/17/2013 1:55:41 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 10:28:05 PM, natoast wrote:
At 2/16/2013 7:42:26 PM, SovereignDream wrote:
What the hell could be so wrong in your life at 14 to make you want to run away, kill yourself, or be "depressed"? Honestly, my first reaction when I hear somebody say that they're "depressed" is to tell them to grow some balls and get over such an often very silly "depression".

At 2/16/2013 7:42:26 PM, SovereignDream wrote:
What the hell could be so wrong in your life at 14 to make you want to run away, kill yourself, or be "depressed"? Honestly, my first reaction when I hear somebody say that they're "depressed" is to tell them to grow some balls and get over such an often very silly "depression".

Jesus man, what's your problem? Depression is relative. Just because his problems wouldn't make you depressed doesn't mean that suddenly he has no right to be. Wait until you've been depressed to judge someone for it. Also, it's mostly a result of chemicals anyways.
As for my advice to you Virus, I would say you should just stop thinking about it all. Just go with whatever happens and don't consider the future and stop trying to analyze every little detail. Keep your mind as blank as possible until it passes, which it will. It worked for me.

Thanks
"So you want me to go to the judge with 'unit, corps, God, country'?" - A Few Good Men

"And the hits just keep on comin'." -A Few Good Men
bladerunner060
Posts: 7,126
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2/17/2013 2:51:39 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
Depression is messed up. No es bueno. And those that tell you to "just get over it" can, generally, eat a bowl of dick.

In general, though, I would say this (and bear in mind, I'm not exactly a neurotypical, so certain aspects of this are easier for me than others, and certain others are harder):

Analyze your depression, if you can. Is it REALLY related to SPECIFIC things? If so, then fix them. Sure, that sounds easy. And far be it from me to say "just fix them" in a general sense. What I mean is, to figure out how you can fix them. Pinpoint problems, and figure out solutions. If you have specific problems, ask for help from people whose opinion you respect, but don't just say "I"m depressed", say "I am depressed BECAUSE X". There are ALWAYS solutions, though they obviously aren't always "easy" ones. If you can't really pinpoint it to specific things, there may well be a chemical reason for your depression, and if that's the case, the answer is drugs.

See a shrink if at all possible.

Remember that suicide is the nuclear option, and in general it's a bad answer, as seductive as it might seem. PM someone specific, or make a phone call. Hell, if you don't want to call the suicide line, call 911. I've known more than a few people that took a trip to the ER, and after some time there managed to get themselves adjusted.
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Kinesis
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2/17/2013 6:05:20 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 8:52:49 PM, THEVIRUS wrote:
At 2/16/2013 8:43:20 PM, Kinesis wrote:
My advice: do something progressive. Something you can learn to be better at every day. So learn a language, learn to cook, go to a martial arts class or something like that. Something you can be proud of doing. Once you think you can do something worthwhile, you won't want to end yourself. Don't just do things you enjoy, do things that you can enjoy in the future too. Then you'll look forward to what the future holds. Also, exercise. The rush of endorphins after a good session will make you feel great.

I have tried some things, but some of them are extra stress. I know they will help in the future, but some days I just come home and fall asleep (at 3 o'clock) and wake up for school the next morning to find out that while sleeping I missed out on something I would enjoy. A bad circumstance?

Yeah, I know, it's a catch 22. You might be able to pull out of your depression by doing something like that, but because of your depression you can't muster up the willpower to do it. If you're massively oversleeping then it sounds to me like you have an actual chemical problem or something. I don't have an answer for you, you should probably try and see a professional. It might be curable with meds or therapy. I don't have the answer, but good luck.
TUF
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2/17/2013 7:32:35 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
Embrace the suck, the reward at the end is far more worth it than the temporary pain you feel now. I just graduated basic combat training in the army, and the stress of being awau from my family, friends, and fiance, with no communication whatsoever for 3 months was pretty hard on me because I wasn't used to it (maybe I am not as strong as other people are when it comes to this kind of stuff, I thought I would be though).

To help motivate me through it, I had to constantly remind myself that it was going to get better, and that I would have everything I want and more soon. You should be greatful for the hard times, that make life a bit moer challenging. If everything was handed to you on a silver platter, than accomplishing the things you want wouldn't be nearly as fulfilling.

I know your young, and a lot of this may not make sense to you, but this is my best advice.

I know you dis-agree with your parents and the way they do things. I know it feels like they are ostricizing you. And at 14, this might be the absolute hardest thing you will ever have to do but, try it anyway.

Look at things from their point of view. Try to find and understand the reasons they are doing the things they are doing. Most parents aren't out to intentionally make their children suffer, no matter how much it seems to you at that moment.
When you look at things from a different perspective, you mat find that your parents aren't out to get you so much as they are trying to help you. The homework being finished early than it's supposed to be, may just be because they want to teach you iportant life tools for later on. I for one, have first hand experience in seeing how being early, rather than doing things last minute can be far more helpful than stalling to the last minute. Again, try seeing things from the POV that they are setting you up for success later on in life.

My last piece of advice is to toughen up, and love yourself enough to realize that you are worth the end means. That small circle you feel so confined to, you may have the power to widen it a lot more than you think you do. Maybe by showing your parents that you care about what they have to say, and by letting your gaurd down just a bit, they will realize that they can entrust more responsibility on you. And even if they don't, (I don't know your parents), try being greatful for what you do have in that circle and utilize every tool you've got. Giving up definitely isn't the way to go, I can promise you that. Nothing you want is assosiacted with death. Death is unknown, no matter your religion. But we are far too young to want to give up our life because of our dis-agreeance with somebody else. All is not lost. Use your parents to your advantage. Manipulate them (in a good way) if you have to, to use them to your advantage.
Find your self worth, the things that you find most motivated for living for. Like 343 for example. What ways can you prepare youself to that goal? Think of things you parents are doing and associate them with you preparing to be a better individual, or employee, or whatever it is you need. Your life is only as exciting as you want it to be, and you have a lot more control than you probably think you do.

I hope my advice is at least semi-helpful. If you have any questions, I'll answer them for you. But understand I am only here to help you if you generally want things to get better. I have realized time and time again the difference between people looking for someone to feel sorry for them, and people who actually want help. If you are the latter, then maybe there is hope for you.
"I've got to go and grab a shirt" ~ Airmax1227
TheElderScroll
Posts: 643
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2/17/2013 10:10:37 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
imagine everything you love in life and imagine yourself in jail with those things right outside your cell. every once and a while you can go out, or enjoy one of those hobbies while slaving outside in the yard, but any time you try to be or express yourself it is either reprimanded or punished or quenched.

to be exact the thing I pleasure most is probably gaming, and dream of working for 343i. It is probably the thing that keeps me going but also the thing most hated by my parents.

Your words: "but any time you try to be or express yourself it is either reprimanded or punished or quenched." caught my attentions. My advice is: attempt to find the middle ground that both you and your parents would accept. Although I am not familiar with gaming industry, but from what I do know, in order for one to work in it, one must be very knowledgable in computer programing. Perhaps instead of playing games, you can try to allocate some of your free time to programing study. It may help your parents reevaluate the value of your endeavors.

Whenever you feel despaired: Cry. It is not a sign of weakness. And trust me, you will feel much better after you cry. Smile whenever you can. Self-immolation is not a path you should travel upon.
SovereignDream
Posts: 1,119
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2/17/2013 10:57:20 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 8:06:40 PM, darkkermit wrote:
At 2/16/2013 7:42:26 PM, SovereignDream wrote:
What the hell could be so wrong in your life at 14 to make you want to run away, kill yourself, or be "depressed"? Honestly, my first reaction when I hear somebody say that they're "depressed" is to tell them to grow some balls and get over such an often very silly "depression".

Do you remember what it was like to be 14? I wouldn't exactly call it an awesome time, especially for different people.

Yea, I remember. I don't remember anything bad about it (I speak generally, of course; there's always conflicts in one's life). I seemed to enjoy life back then, just as I do now.
SovereignDream
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2/17/2013 11:00:38 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 8:36:16 PM, THEVIRUS wrote:
I wouldn't be the first, and suicide was too strong a word for my current position. I meant that if things continually get worse. I also left out (as stated earlier) the fact that I have people at school who put me in headlocks, choke me, and hold me against a wall when I try to do something - basically bullying, but they do something to make it up before they continue. So school isn't just homework and teachers.

I'm sorry to hear that. Why the hell are people doing that to you? What type of school do you got to, for Pete's sake? I ask seriously: why does that happen to you, and what can you do to make it stop (you know, without going all out Columbine, of course)?
THEVIRUS
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2/17/2013 3:02:37 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/17/2013 11:00:38 AM, SovereignDream wrote:
At 2/16/2013 8:36:16 PM, THEVIRUS wrote:
I wouldn't be the first, and suicide was too strong a word for my current position. I meant that if things continually get worse. I also left out (as stated earlier) the fact that I have people at school who put me in headlocks, choke me, and hold me against a wall when I try to do something - basically bullying, but they do something to make it up before they continue. So school isn't just homework and teachers.

I'm sorry to hear that. Why the hell are people doing that to you? What type of school do you got to, for Pete's sake? I ask seriously: why does that happen to you, and what can you do to make it stop (you know, without going all out Columbine, of course)?

It is slowly getting better, but one time unknowingly I annoyed them (they don't even remember exactly) and they started using my lack of physical strength - I weigh 74 pounds - against me, and my passive aggression only annoyed them more. Luckily it isn't as bad as it was one time, but it is still an issue. I've found some friends (actual friends not just bodyguards) who can help when they pin me or do other stuff.
"So you want me to go to the judge with 'unit, corps, God, country'?" - A Few Good Men

"And the hits just keep on comin'." -A Few Good Men
THEVIRUS
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2/17/2013 3:05:12 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/17/2013 2:51:39 AM, bladerunner060 wrote:
Depression is messed up. No es bueno. And those that tell you to "just get over it" can, generally, eat a bowl of dick.

In general, though, I would say this (and bear in mind, I'm not exactly a neurotypical, so certain aspects of this are easier for me than others, and certain others are harder):

Analyze your depression, if you can. Is it REALLY related to SPECIFIC things? If so, then fix them. Sure, that sounds easy. And far be it from me to say "just fix them" in a general sense. What I mean is, to figure out how you can fix them. Pinpoint problems, and figure out solutions. If you have specific problems, ask for help from people whose opinion you respect, but don't just say "I"m depressed", say "I am depressed BECAUSE X". There are ALWAYS solutions, though they obviously aren't always "easy" ones. If you can't really pinpoint it to specific things, there may well be a chemical reason for your depression, and if that's the case, the answer is drugs.

See a shrink if at all possible.

Remember that suicide is the nuclear option, and in general it's a bad answer, as seductive as it might seem. PM someone specific, or make a phone call. Hell, if you don't want to call the suicide line, call 911. I've known more than a few people that took a trip to the ER, and after some time there managed to get themselves adjusted.

Why should I take drugs? do you mean by doctor's prescription or just take a lot of stuff I don't need?
"So you want me to go to the judge with 'unit, corps, God, country'?" - A Few Good Men

"And the hits just keep on comin'." -A Few Good Men
THEVIRUS
Posts: 1,321
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2/17/2013 3:09:27 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/17/2013 7:32:35 AM, TUF wrote:
Embrace the suck, the reward at the end is far more worth it than the temporary pain you feel now. I just graduated basic combat training in the army, and the stress of being awau from my family, friends, and fiance, with no communication whatsoever for 3 months was pretty hard on me because I wasn't used to it (maybe I am not as strong as other people are when it comes to this kind of stuff, I thought I would be though).

To help motivate me through it, I had to constantly remind myself that it was going to get better, and that I would have everything I want and more soon. You should be greatful for the hard times, that make life a bit moer challenging. If everything was handed to you on a silver platter, than accomplishing the things you want wouldn't be nearly as fulfilling.

I know your young, and a lot of this may not make sense to you, but this is my best advice.

I know you dis-agree with your parents and the way they do things. I know it feels like they are ostricizing you. And at 14, this might be the absolute hardest thing you will ever have to do but, try it anyway.

Look at things from their point of view. Try to find and understand the reasons they are doing the things they are doing. Most parents aren't out to intentionally make their children suffer, no matter how much it seems to you at that moment. : When you look at things from a different perspective, you mat find that your parents aren't out to get you so much as they are trying to help you. The homework being finished early than it's supposed to be, may just be because they want to teach you iportant life tools for later on. I for one, have first hand experience in seeing how being early, rather than doing things last minute can be far more helpful than stalling to the last minute. Again, try seeing things from the POV that they are setting you up for success later on in life.

My last piece of advice is to toughen up, and love yourself enough to realize that you are worth the end means. That small circle you feel so confined to, you may have the power to widen it a lot more than you think you do. Maybe by showing your parents that you care about what they have to say, and by letting your gaurd down just a bit, they will realize that they can entrust more responsibility on you. And even if they don't, (I don't know your parents), try being greatful for what you do have in that circle and utilize every tool you've got. Giving up definitely isn't the way to go, I can promise you that. Nothing you want is assosiacted with death. Death is unknown, no matter your religion. But we are far too young to want to give up our life because of our dis-agreeance with somebody else. All is not lost. Use your parents to your advantage. Manipulate them (in a good way) if you have to, to use them to your advantage.
Find your self worth, the things that you find most motivated for living for. Like 343 for example. What ways can you prepare youself to that goal? Think of things you parents are doing and associate them with you preparing to be a better individual, or employee, or whatever it is you need. Your life is only as exciting as you want it to be, and you have a lot more control than you probably think you do.


I hope my advice is at least semi-helpful. If you have any questions, I'll answer them for you. But understand I am only here to help you if you generally want things to get better. I have realized time and time again the difference between people looking for someone to feel sorry for them, and people who actually want help. If you are the latter, then maybe there is hope for you.

I can see why they are doing it, but they always do things to make me grow into their idea of a good Christian man. If you've seen a lot of my posts and comments, I am an atheist, so I get some of it but what I don't like is when they wont let me hang out with an atheist so they make up stuff for me to do.
"So you want me to go to the judge with 'unit, corps, God, country'?" - A Few Good Men

"And the hits just keep on comin'." -A Few Good Men
darkkermit
Posts: 11,204
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2/17/2013 3:13:46 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/17/2013 3:09:27 PM, THEVIRUS wrote:
At 2/17/2013 7:32:35 AM, TUF wrote:
Embrace the suck, the reward at the end is far more worth it than the temporary pain you feel now. I just graduated basic combat training in the army, and the stress of being awau from my family, friends, and fiance, with no communication whatsoever for 3 months was pretty hard on me because I wasn't used to it (maybe I am not as strong as other people are when it comes to this kind of stuff, I thought I would be though).

To help motivate me through it, I had to constantly remind myself that it was going to get better, and that I would have everything I want and more soon. You should be greatful for the hard times, that make life a bit moer challenging. If everything was handed to you on a silver platter, than accomplishing the things you want wouldn't be nearly as fulfilling.

I know your young, and a lot of this may not make sense to you, but this is my best advice.

I know you dis-agree with your parents and the way they do things. I know it feels like they are ostricizing you. And at 14, this might be the absolute hardest thing you will ever have to do but, try it anyway.

Look at things from their point of view. Try to find and understand the reasons they are doing the things they are doing. Most parents aren't out to intentionally make their children suffer, no matter how much it seems to you at that moment. : When you look at things from a different perspective, you mat find that your parents aren't out to get you so much as they are trying to help you. The homework being finished early than it's supposed to be, may just be because they want to teach you iportant life tools for later on. I for one, have first hand experience in seeing how being early, rather than doing things last minute can be far more helpful than stalling to the last minute. Again, try seeing things from the POV that they are setting you up for success later on in life.

My last piece of advice is to toughen up, and love yourself enough to realize that you are worth the end means. That small circle you feel so confined to, you may have the power to widen it a lot more than you think you do. Maybe by showing your parents that you care about what they have to say, and by letting your gaurd down just a bit, they will realize that they can entrust more responsibility on you. And even if they don't, (I don't know your parents), try being greatful for what you do have in that circle and utilize every tool you've got. Giving up definitely isn't the way to go, I can promise you that. Nothing you want is assosiacted with death. Death is unknown, no matter your religion. But we are far too young to want to give up our life because of our dis-agreeance with somebody else. All is not lost. Use your parents to your advantage. Manipulate them (in a good way) if you have to, to use them to your advantage.
Find your self worth, the things that you find most motivated for living for. Like 343 for example. What ways can you prepare youself to that goal? Think of things you parents are doing and associate them with you preparing to be a better individual, or employee, or whatever it is you need. Your life is only as exciting as you want it to be, and you have a lot more control than you probably think you do.


I hope my advice is at least semi-helpful. If you have any questions, I'll answer them for you. But understand I am only here to help you if you generally want things to get better. I have realized time and time again the difference between people looking for someone to feel sorry for them, and people who actually want help. If you are the latter, then maybe there is hope for you.

I can see why they are doing it, but they always do things to make me grow into their idea of a good Christian man. If you've seen a lot of my posts and comments, I am an atheist, so I get some of it but what I don't like is when they wont let me hang out with an atheist so they make up stuff for me to do.

Have you tried lying? While I don't condone lying in all circumstances, if your in a situation where you have little power and don't have any options, sometimes it can be the best solution.
Open borders debate:
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THEVIRUS
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2/17/2013 3:34:13 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/17/2013 3:13:46 PM, darkkermit wrote:
At 2/17/2013 3:09:27 PM, THEVIRUS wrote:
At 2/17/2013 7:32:35 AM, TUF wrote:
Embrace the suck, the reward at the end is far more worth it than the temporary pain you feel now. I just graduated basic combat training in the army, and the stress of being awau from my family, friends, and fiance, with no communication whatsoever for 3 months was pretty hard on me because I wasn't used to it (maybe I am not as strong as other people are when it comes to this kind of stuff, I thought I would be though).

To help motivate me through it, I had to constantly remind myself that it was going to get better, and that I would have everything I want and more soon. You should be greatful for the hard times, that make life a bit moer challenging. If everything was handed to you on a silver platter, than accomplishing the things you want wouldn't be nearly as fulfilling.

I know your young, and a lot of this may not make sense to you, but this is my best advice.

I know you dis-agree with your parents and the way they do things. I know it feels like they are ostricizing you. And at 14, this might be the absolute hardest thing you will ever have to do but, try it anyway.

Look at things from their point of view. Try to find and understand the reasons they are doing the things they are doing. Most parents aren't out to intentionally make their children suffer, no matter how much it seems to you at that moment. : When you look at things from a different perspective, you mat find that your parents aren't out to get you so much as they are trying to help you. The homework being finished early than it's supposed to be, may just be because they want to teach you iportant life tools for later on. I for one, have first hand experience in seeing how being early, rather than doing things last minute can be far more helpful than stalling to the last minute. Again, try seeing things from the POV that they are setting you up for success later on in life.

My last piece of advice is to toughen up, and love yourself enough to realize that you are worth the end means. That small circle you feel so confined to, you may have the power to widen it a lot more than you think you do. Maybe by showing your parents that you care about what they have to say, and by letting your gaurd down just a bit, they will realize that they can entrust more responsibility on you. And even if they don't, (I don't know your parents), try being greatful for what you do have in that circle and utilize every tool you've got. Giving up definitely isn't the way to go, I can promise you that. Nothing you want is assosiacted with death. Death is unknown, no matter your religion. But we are far too young to want to give up our life because of our dis-agreeance with somebody else. All is not lost. Use your parents to your advantage. Manipulate them (in a good way) if you have to, to use them to your advantage.
Find your self worth, the things that you find most motivated for living for. Like 343 for example. What ways can you prepare youself to that goal? Think of things you parents are doing and associate them with you preparing to be a better individual, or employee, or whatever it is you need. Your life is only as exciting as you want it to be, and you have a lot more control than you probably think you do.


I hope my advice is at least semi-helpful. If you have any questions, I'll answer them for you. But understand I am only here to help you if you generally want things to get better. I have realized time and time again the difference between people looking for someone to feel sorry for them, and people who actually want help. If you are the latter, then maybe there is hope for you.

I can see why they are doing it, but they always do things to make me grow into their idea of a good Christian man. If you've seen a lot of my posts and comments, I am an atheist, so I get some of it but what I don't like is when they wont let me hang out with an atheist so they make up stuff for me to do.

Have you tried lying? While I don't condone lying in all circumstances, if your in a situation where you have little power and don't have any options, sometimes it can be the best solution.

I lie all the time. I go to church every sunday and act like I am fine with it, fake a prayer when they force me to pray, and hell, when they leave me alone at my house I start playing Xbox. Any specific ideas, or just lie?
"So you want me to go to the judge with 'unit, corps, God, country'?" - A Few Good Men

"And the hits just keep on comin'." -A Few Good Men
muzebreak
Posts: 2,781
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2/17/2013 3:43:30 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 7:33:58 PM, THEVIRUS wrote:
Goldberg's depression test


You have reached level 34 on the Goldberg scale.


0 - 9 Depression unlikely 21 - 35 Minor to moderate depression
10 - 17 Possibly minor depression 36 - 53 Moderate to severe depression
18 - 21 On the verge of depression 54+ Severe depression



You are having suicidal thoughts. This is a serious warning sign, and you must seek help quickly.



You have the symptoms of depression. These symptoms seem to cause a considerable amount of problems in your everyday life, and it would be advisable to consult a doctor.

Depression is a disease like any other disease, and it can be treated very effectively. Recognising that you are suffering from depression is the first positive step. If you are depressed, you should arrange to see your doctor to talk about the illness right away. You may also want to raise the issue with your friends and family. You should look for support from these people you until you get well. Anyone can suffer from depression, and the symptoms can vary from person to person. Treatments, including medication and psychotherapy, have a very high success rate.

This was my "score". Slightly surprised. It isn't that I don't find worth in life, it is more as if the rules prohibit the few things I enjoy. And being 14 doesn't help. My parents keep a hold on these restrictions tighter than need be and I feel like I'm stuck in a cage. Not quite to suicide, but already have plans set up to run away if things get worse and when I turn 16 I think I might just get in the car and drive for a long, long time. I feel like it's getting worse, and need more stability. Any ideas?

Your honor roll in all classes, so your clearly a smart kid. Here's what you do. You graduate high school as soon as possible. Instead of thinking about how much it sucks to have to spend all your time studying and doing stuff your parents want to do, think of it as being a few less hours that you have to go through that same crap. After you get out of high school, go to college and live away from your parents. Go as far away as you want. To a different country, or a different town. But what every you do, your best bet of getting out of this well off is to graduate high school first. Trust me, coming from a guy who dropped out when he was 16, if you have the choice make sure you graduate. If you don't it limits the things you can do in life.
"Every kid starts out as a natural-born scientist, and then we beat it out of them. A few trickle through the system with their wonder and enthusiasm for science intact." - Carl Sagan

This is the response of the defenders of Sparta to the Commander of the Roman Army: "If you are a god, you will not hurt those who have never injured you. If you are a man, advance - you will find men equal to yourself. And women.
sadolite
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2/17/2013 4:16:58 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 2/16/2013 7:33:58 PM, THEVIRUS wrote:
Goldberg's depression test


You have reached level 34 on the Goldberg scale.


0 - 9 Depression unlikely 21 - 35 Minor to moderate depression
10 - 17 Possibly minor depression 36 - 53 Moderate to severe depression
18 - 21 On the verge of depression 54+ Severe depression



You are having suicidal thoughts. This is a serious warning sign, and you must seek help quickly.



You have the symptoms of depression. These symptoms seem to cause a considerable amount of problems in your everyday life, and it would be advisable to consult a doctor.

Depression is a disease like any other disease, and it can be treated very effectively. Recognising that you are suffering from depression is the first positive step. If you are depressed, you should arrange to see your doctor to talk about the illness right away. You may also want to raise the issue with your friends and family. You should look for support from these people you until you get well. Anyone can suffer from depression, and the symptoms can vary from person to person. Treatments, including medication and psychotherapy, have a very high success rate.

This was my "score". Slightly surprised. It isn't that I don't find worth in life, it is more as if the rules prohibit the few things I enjoy. And being 14 doesn't help. My parents keep a hold on these restrictions tighter than need be and I feel like I'm stuck in a cage. Not quite to suicide, but already have plans set up to run away if things get worse and when I turn 16 I think I might just get in the car and drive for a long, long time. I feel like it's getting worse, and need more stability. Any ideas?

Do you have a cell phone connected to facebook. If you do get rid of it now and your life will improve over night.

And this may sound insensitive and mean but it is absolute truth. If you think it's bad now, it gets way way way way way way way way worse. You havent seen anything yet. The world and your parents don't owe you anything. Life is what you make of it. Don't blame your depression and sense of being caged on anyone but yourself. Your parents have a responsibilty to take care of you and teach you right from wrong the best they know how. Until you turn 18 and or pay your own way through life..................................
It's not your views that divide us, it's what you think my views should be that divides us.

If you think I will give up my rights and forsake social etiquette to make you "FEEL" better you are sadly mistaken

If liberal democrats would just stop shooting people gun violence would drop by 90%