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I no longer have the will to debate.

Eitan_Zohar
Posts: 2,697
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7/2/2013 6:09:25 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
It's been over a year and a half, I think, and I have completely and utterly lost the will to invest any time in a debate. Every round that I have ever posted in the last six months has been last minute and rushed, in every debate. It's not about procrastination. Something is physically stopping me. I'll intend to post my argument on the first day, and I can't do it. It makes sense to, but my fingers will not move. I need time to prepare, mentally. A few minutes goes by. I'll look at a discussion on the forums. I'll post something and get involved. Sometimes I'll read. I cannot wrap the part of my mind responsible for action around the fact that I need to make an argument. Maybe I'll play a game. After all, I do have hours left to the day, and two more entire days in which to post one measly round. After a few hours, I've forgotten about it. When I do remember it's usually late and I need to try getting to sleep. So why not get a head start on it and at least do some research; find some sources, I ask myself? After staring at the first Google results I get, I realize that I simply don't have the will to do research anymore. And why should I? I have an entire day ahead of me in which I can awake refreshed and put actual energy into. At that point I no longer have free will. I don't procrastinate because I don't want to do it, and certainly not because I'm incapable of it; the part of me that I can't control, that exists beyond my waking mind and gives me the need to breath, to eat, and to rest simply slithers out of its hole and takes charge.

This scenario repeats itself, until I realize that I have a few hours left and that I will, for sure, forfeit the round unless I start typing now. In that situation, I guess the knowledge that this has to be done now affects the part of my subconscious in control and it finally relents, as long as I don't spend any more energy on it than I absolutely need to. Even during the final day, I can't bring myself to do it unless I estimate that I'll just make it.

Even when I come to the computer completely determined to type up and post an entire round, I can't help it but turn to something more stimulating for a few seconds, and in those seconds I lose minutes, hours, days, and finally I end up posting whatever garbage links I can get from Google and Wikipedia because I don't have any time to do genuine research (I'm not even sure how that is done on the internet- Wikipedia is horrifically sourced, often not at all, and Google Scholar is every bit as useless as Google vanilla).

I'm not sure if this is normal procrastination or if something is wrong with me. Maybe it's because I'm incredibly cynical about the idea of "honesty" or "promises." I see no genuine philosophical reason why either of those concepts matter fundamentally. I wouldn't hesitate to betray a country which I had served all my life, or a deal with a businessman if I thought that my actions would result in a better outcome. Maybe those obligations evolved for an important psychological purpose and that's what I'm missing. I don't know.

When I first joined the site I actually enjoyed posting. My first serious debate was with WSA over tariffs. Of course I didn't grasp even the most basic principles of economics and to me research was an alien concept, but I took sources from other debates and from whatever articles I could scrap up on Google. At that time he wasn't really knowledgeable either (or I would have been toast), but I refuted all his arguments, dodged the ones I couldn't make sense of, and won. A lot of my early debates were like that, and they certainly weren't postponed or ignored until the last minute because I actually looked forward to refuting the arguments.

I think that the last debate in which felt passionate about infamous debate with Danielle over her alleged cheating tactics. My last round which required me to type over 30,000 characters of text (the entire post was 60,000, actually, but half of it was quoted material) made me stay up the entire night and drained me to the bone. It was early morning when I finished and I had an hour and a half left on the clock. During the final editing process I actually fell asleep, but the primordial instinct that recognizes need somehow woke me up only an hour later, whereupon I managed to finish and post it (I still don't know how- maybe that's how some people manage to wake up on schedule no matter when they go to sleep).

Anyway, I wanted to throw up over the idea of having a debate after that. I simply didn't enjoy it anymore. I assumed that it would last for a few days because of the bad taste from it, but it didn't go away. I don't know why, and I don't know how (perhaps it was because I lost faith in the whole concept and realized that voting genuinely didn't follow argumentation- after all, I gave detailed, line-by-line refutation to which we both knew there was no response to and I still lost unanimously).

Yes, I was growing bored with it before the debate with Danielle, but I had absolutely no desire to afterward. And I'm no longer fit to do it. My entire edge is gone. Of course I can easily refute nonsense from, *ahem* certain users on here, but in a serious debate I think I'd just forfeit. I don't enjoy the clash of facts and sources anymore.

I'm not going to ever leave the site; there are too many intelligent and awesome people here, but I don't see how I'll ever return to debating.
"It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what others say in a whole book."
ConservativePolitico
Posts: 8,210
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7/2/2013 6:50:45 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
Thus is the evolution of DDO users. There was a good forum thread about it. This is just the natural progression.

It might come back to you. I thought I was done debating but I've restarted again.
benevolent
Posts: 1,040
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7/2/2013 6:51:25 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/2/2013 6:50:45 PM, ConservativePolitico wrote:
Thus is the evolution of DDO users. There was a good forum thread about it. This is just the natural progression.

It might come back to you. I thought I was done debating but I've restarted again.

hilarious. jesus christ
ConservativePolitico
Posts: 8,210
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7/2/2013 6:55:01 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/2/2013 6:51:25 PM, benevolent wrote:
At 7/2/2013 6:50:45 PM, ConservativePolitico wrote:
Thus is the evolution of DDO users. There was a good forum thread about it. This is just the natural progression.

It might come back to you. I thought I was done debating but I've restarted again.

hilarious. jesus christ

Can we IP ban you? I really do hate you.
ConservativePolitico
Posts: 8,210
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7/2/2013 7:01:48 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/2/2013 6:59:37 PM, benevolent wrote:
only because you're a child

No, quite the opposite actually. You never put forward anything constructive. Ever. Not once. You're a waste of space here.
Eitan_Zohar
Posts: 2,697
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7/2/2013 7:02:00 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/2/2013 6:50:45 PM, ConservativePolitico wrote:
Thus is the evolution of DDO users. There was a good forum thread about it. This is just the natural progression.

It might come back to you. I thought I was done debating but I've restarted again.

Six months bro.
"It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what others say in a whole book."
Eitan_Zohar
Posts: 2,697
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7/2/2013 7:03:05 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/2/2013 7:01:48 PM, ConservativePolitico wrote:
At 7/2/2013 6:59:37 PM, benevolent wrote:
only because you're a child

No, quite the opposite actually. You never put forward anything constructive. Ever. Not once. You're a waste of space here.

Don't worry, reported to airmax.
"It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what others say in a whole book."
benevolent
Posts: 1,040
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7/2/2013 7:05:19 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/2/2013 7:01:48 PM, ConservativePolitico wrote:
At 7/2/2013 6:59:37 PM, benevolent wrote:
only because you're a child

No, quite the opposite actually. You never put forward anything constructive. Ever. Not once. You're a waste of space here.

i am the reason this gem of idiocy of a thread exists
benevolent
Posts: 1,040
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7/2/2013 7:07:22 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/2/2013 7:05:19 PM, benevolent wrote:
At 7/2/2013 7:01:48 PM, ConservativePolitico wrote:
At 7/2/2013 6:59:37 PM, benevolent wrote:
only because you're a child

No, quite the opposite actually. You never put forward anything constructive. Ever. Not once. You're a waste of space here.

i am the reason this gem of idiocy of a thread exists

and your posts here too. i seem to be living comfortably inside your heads i think
benevolent
Posts: 1,040
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7/2/2013 7:08:35 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
i'm pretty much the most influential person on this forum.......... maybe i should get to trying to predict your idiocy :3
Magic8000
Posts: 975
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7/2/2013 7:15:58 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
Interesting. I've had the feeling of just not wanting to go on when a debate is 5 rounds. Even if I'm doing really well. I do get really board with debating, but if you just stop for a few weeks you tend to come back. Try cutting back to 3 rounds or going off for a few weeks.
404 coherent debate topic not found. Please restart the debate with clear resolution.

"So Magic8000 believes Einstein was a proctologist who was persuaded by the Government and Hitler to fabricate the Theory of Relativity"- GWL-CPA
Eitan_Zohar
Posts: 2,697
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7/2/2013 7:25:22 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/2/2013 7:15:58 PM, Magic8000 wrote:
Interesting. I've had the feeling of just not wanting to go on when a debate is 5 rounds. Even if I'm doing really well. I do get really board with debating, but if you just stop for a few weeks you tend to come back. Try cutting back to 3 rounds or going off for a few weeks.

I've been off for months, and making it shorter wouldn't help. I don't do five rounds anyway.
"It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what others say in a whole book."
Magic8000
Posts: 975
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7/2/2013 7:26:19 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
Or you could try troll debates instead of serious ones. All of the troll debates I've done have been really fun.
404 coherent debate topic not found. Please restart the debate with clear resolution.

"So Magic8000 believes Einstein was a proctologist who was persuaded by the Government and Hitler to fabricate the Theory of Relativity"- GWL-CPA
RyuuKyuzo
Posts: 3,074
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7/2/2013 7:28:28 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
It comes and goes. I took 2 years off once (back in my CreateDebate days).
If you're reading this, you're awesome and you should feel awesome.
phantom
Posts: 6,774
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7/2/2013 7:36:14 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
It happens.
"Music is a zen-like ecstatic state where you become the new man of the future, the Nietzschean merger of Apollo and Dionysus." Ray Manzarek (The Doors)
benevolent
Posts: 1,040
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7/2/2013 7:48:59 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
i'd just like to apologize for being a pr1ck before i go to bed. i lose the run of myself sometimes and talk sh*t. peace dudes.
benevolent
Posts: 1,040
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7/2/2013 7:52:36 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/2/2013 7:51:45 PM, benevolent wrote:
i have just constructed a cigarette from like 8 other cigarettes

it can be done!
ConservativePolitico
Posts: 8,210
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7/2/2013 11:22:46 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/2/2013 7:55:00 PM, benevolent wrote:
imagine being my family...

why don't you post again, once more. Or make another 5+ post chain of you talking to yourself. Those are wonderful.
drafterman
Posts: 18,870
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7/3/2013 8:46:22 AM
Posted: 3 years ago
Maybe not create 80 threads every time you want to generate publicity for one of your debates and you'd have more energy to spare in the debate itself?

Maybe?
Eitan_Zohar
Posts: 2,697
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7/3/2013 4:28:01 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/3/2013 8:46:22 AM, drafterman wrote:
Maybe not create 80 threads every time you want to generate publicity for one of your debates and you'd have more energy to spare in the debate itself?

Maybe?

Ah, but then how would I call out cheaters?

Serious answers please?
"It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what others say in a whole book."
Poetaster
Posts: 587
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7/3/2013 4:49:32 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
Fitting one's pursuits to a personal aesthetic framework, instead of one informed by obligation, ensures that the ugliness of intellectual burn-out will be minimized. For example, in the past, I've forced myself to finish books that I had ceased to enjoy, doing so out of a sense of misplaced discipline. I've since come to appreciate that electing discomfort in the name of private self-obligation is a needlessly stubborn and silly perversion of personal recreation; I now put the book down when I feel like it.

If something which once interested me loses its allure, I deny the instinct of morbid duty to those weakened interests by reminding myself that force-feeding is a form of torture. I then wait until I'm hungry again; that is both the beauty and burden of appetite.
"The book you are looking for hasn't been written yet. What you are looking for you are going to have to find yourself, it's not going to be in a book..." -Sidewalker
drafterman
Posts: 18,870
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7/3/2013 7:11:45 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/3/2013 4:28:01 PM, Eitan_Zohar wrote:
At 7/3/2013 8:46:22 AM, drafterman wrote:
Maybe not create 80 threads every time you want to generate publicity for one of your debates and you'd have more energy to spare in the debate itself?

Maybe?

Ah, but then how would I call out cheaters?

Serious answers please?

A PM to Airmax.
ClassicRobert
Posts: 2,487
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7/3/2013 9:02:45 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/2/2013 7:28:28 PM, RyuuKyuzo wrote:
It comes and goes. I took 2 years off once (back in my CreateDebate days).

You had another account before this one? It says you only joined 11 months ago.
Debate me: Economic decision theory should be adjusted to include higher-order preferences for non-normative purposes http://www.debate.org...

Do you really believe that? Or not? If you believe it, you should man up and defend it in a debate. -RoyLatham

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Eitan_Zohar
Posts: 2,697
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7/3/2013 10:34:11 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/3/2013 4:49:32 PM, Poetaster wrote:
Fitting one's pursuits to a personal aesthetic framework, instead of one informed by obligation, ensures that the ugliness of intellectual burn-out will be minimized. For example, in the past, I've forced myself to finish books that I had ceased to enjoy, doing so out of a sense of misplaced discipline. I've since come to appreciate that electing discomfort in the name of private self-obligation is a needlessly stubborn and silly perversion of personal recreation; I now put the book down when I feel like it.

If something which once interested me loses its allure, I deny the instinct of morbid duty to those weakened interests by reminding myself that force-feeding is a form of torture. I then wait until I'm hungry again; that is both the beauty and burden of appetite.

Amen.
"It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what others say in a whole book."
Eitan_Zohar
Posts: 2,697
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7/3/2013 10:34:41 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 7/3/2013 9:02:45 PM, ClassicRobert wrote:
At 7/2/2013 7:28:28 PM, RyuuKyuzo wrote:
It comes and goes. I took 2 years off once (back in my CreateDebate days).

You had another account before this one? It says you only joined 11 months ago.

I think he means on CreateDebate.
"It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what others say in a whole book."