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Chivalry?

justin.graves
Posts: 220
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8/4/2013 1:37:04 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
In light of a recent opinions question in which many people espoused the values of slapping women, what is your take on chivalry. I've literally offered to carry stuff for women before only to be told "I have arms!" Or offered to pay for their lunch "I'm not poor!" Or held the door for them. "What, you think I'm too weak to open a door."

It appears women don't even want chivalry these days. Instead many seem like Skeptikitten, who pretty much says hitting women is OK because they aren't weak. What's your take on this.
-Justin K. Graves, Demon Hunter
AnDoctuir
Posts: 11,060
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8/4/2013 1:47:20 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
I don't think they want to be hit dude, just security. Times are changing and they've much more opportunity now, and given that people generally trust themselves most of all, it only makes sense that they'll strive for the greater sense of security that comes with complete independence. I'm pretty sure it's quite the opposite to that they want to be hit.
Magic8000
Posts: 975
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8/4/2013 2:15:20 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/4/2013 1:37:04 PM, justin.graves wrote:
Or held the door for them. "What, you think I'm too weak to open a door."

I've heard, that's where that tradition came from. They thought the women were too weak.
404 coherent debate topic not found. Please restart the debate with clear resolution.

"So Magic8000 believes Einstein was a proctologist who was persuaded by the Government and Hitler to fabricate the Theory of Relativity"- GWL-CPA
Jack212
Posts: 572
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8/4/2013 3:28:05 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/4/2013 1:37:04 PM, justin.graves wrote:
In light of a recent opinions question in which many people espoused the values of slapping women, what is your take on chivalry. I've literally offered to carry stuff for women before only to be told "I have arms!" Or offered to pay for their lunch "I'm not poor!" Or held the door for them. "What, you think I'm too weak to open a door."

It appears women don't even want chivalry these days. Instead many seem like Skeptikitten, who pretty much says hitting women is OK because they aren't weak. What's your take on this.

Men don't open doors because they think women are weak, they do it out of care and respect. As long as there are women who appreciate chivalry, I'm going to continue practicing it. I can handle a 50% success rate, which is what I get at the moment.
justin.graves
Posts: 220
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8/4/2013 3:29:01 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/4/2013 3:28:05 PM, Jack212 wrote:
At 8/4/2013 1:37:04 PM, justin.graves wrote:
In light of a recent opinions question in which many people espoused the values of slapping women, what is your take on chivalry. I've literally offered to carry stuff for women before only to be told "I have arms!" Or offered to pay for their lunch "I'm not poor!" Or held the door for them. "What, you think I'm too weak to open a door."

It appears women don't even want chivalry these days. Instead many seem like Skeptikitten, who pretty much says hitting women is OK because they aren't weak. What's your take on this.

Men don't open doors because they think women are weak, they do it out of care and respect. As long as there are women who appreciate chivalry, I'm going to continue practicing it. I can handle a 50% success rate, which is what I get at the moment.

Thank you, Jack. I have, however, been publicly berated for it. That counts as a negative success rate.
-Justin K. Graves, Demon Hunter
DakotaKrafick
Posts: 1,517
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8/4/2013 3:46:16 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/4/2013 1:37:04 PM, justin.graves wrote:
In light of a recent opinions question in which many people espoused the values of slapping women, what is your take on chivalry. I've literally offered to carry stuff for women before only to be told "I have arms!" Or offered to pay for their lunch "I'm not poor!" Or held the door for them. "What, you think I'm too weak to open a door."

It appears women don't even want chivalry these days. Instead many seem like Skeptikitten, who pretty much says hitting women is OK because they aren't weak. What's your take on this.

I hold doors open for everyone and I'd offer to help someone carry something if it looked strenuous enough regardless of their gender (I wouldn't just say "Hey, need some extra muscle for that binder you're not struggling with?"). And I wouldn't buy lunch for a stranger.

Of course, I'm not single, but even when I was, I don't think I was chivalrous to women exclusively.
justin.graves
Posts: 220
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8/4/2013 3:51:32 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/4/2013 3:46:16 PM, DakotaKrafick wrote:
At 8/4/2013 1:37:04 PM, justin.graves wrote:
In light of a recent opinions question in which many people espoused the values of slapping women, what is your take on chivalry. I've literally offered to carry stuff for women before only to be told "I have arms!" Or offered to pay for their lunch "I'm not poor!" Or held the door for them. "What, you think I'm too weak to open a door."

It appears women don't even want chivalry these days. Instead many seem like Skeptikitten, who pretty much says hitting women is OK because they aren't weak. What's your take on this.

I hold doors open for everyone and I'd offer to help someone carry something if it looked strenuous enough regardless of their gender (I wouldn't just say "Hey, need some extra muscle for that binder you're not struggling with?"). And I wouldn't buy lunch for a stranger.

Of course, I'm not single, but even when I was, I don't think I was chivalrous to women exclusively.

I offered to buy lunch for an acquaintance when I was a page for the NC Senate. She was quite the feminist I found out over lunch. According to her, men shouldn't help women. Ever. Even when they were complaining earlier that they didn't bring enough money for the week and you have plenty of cash and offer to buy...
-Justin K. Graves, Demon Hunter
DakotaKrafick
Posts: 1,517
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8/4/2013 3:54:26 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/4/2013 3:51:32 PM, justin.graves wrote:
At 8/4/2013 3:46:16 PM, DakotaKrafick wrote:
At 8/4/2013 1:37:04 PM, justin.graves wrote:
In light of a recent opinions question in which many people espoused the values of slapping women, what is your take on chivalry. I've literally offered to carry stuff for women before only to be told "I have arms!" Or offered to pay for their lunch "I'm not poor!" Or held the door for them. "What, you think I'm too weak to open a door."

It appears women don't even want chivalry these days. Instead many seem like Skeptikitten, who pretty much says hitting women is OK because they aren't weak. What's your take on this.

I hold doors open for everyone and I'd offer to help someone carry something if it looked strenuous enough regardless of their gender (I wouldn't just say "Hey, need some extra muscle for that binder you're not struggling with?"). And I wouldn't buy lunch for a stranger.

Of course, I'm not single, but even when I was, I don't think I was chivalrous to women exclusively.

I offered to buy lunch for an acquaintance when I was a page for the NC Senate. She was quite the feminist I found out over lunch. According to her, men shouldn't help women. Ever. Even when they were complaining earlier that they didn't bring enough money for the week and you have plenty of cash and offer to buy...

I have nothing interesting to say, so: Okay.
tulle
Posts: 4,445
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8/4/2013 5:11:18 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
I don't think chivalry is necessarily a bad thing. Just today Maikuru and I were sitting outside on stone steps and he offered me his sweater to sit on. It's very thoughtful :)

And I would prefer people hold open doors for everyone---not just men holding them for women. It's just kindness in general.
yang.
Jack212
Posts: 572
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8/4/2013 5:19:55 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/4/2013 3:29:01 PM, justin.graves wrote:
Thank you, Jack. I have, however, been publicly berated for it. That counts as a negative success rate.

There are plenty of women who complain about the lack of gentlemen in today's society. Keep opening doors for them, and the feminists who yell abuse at you will just look like b!tches.
000ike
Posts: 11,196
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8/4/2013 5:43:52 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
I respect women that are offended by chivalry more than those who demand it. Equality means equality. You're not a weak child and you're not a princess, now hold your own damn door and carry your own damn stuff like a self-sufficient human being.
"A stupid despot may constrain his slaves with iron chains; but a true politician binds them even more strongly with the chain of their own ideas" - Michel Foucault
dylancatlow
Posts: 12,245
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8/4/2013 6:29:51 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/4/2013 5:43:52 PM, 000ike wrote:
I respect women that are offended by chivalry more than those who demand it. Equality means equality. You're not a weak child and you're not a princess, now hold your own damn door and carry your own damn stuff like a self-sufficient human being.

Someone's never had a girlfriend.
000ike
Posts: 11,196
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8/4/2013 6:32:52 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/4/2013 6:29:51 PM, dylancatlow wrote:
At 8/4/2013 5:43:52 PM, 000ike wrote:
I respect women that are offended by chivalry more than those who demand it. Equality means equality. You're not a weak child and you're not a princess, now hold your own damn door and carry your own damn stuff like a self-sufficient human being.

Someone's never had a girlfriend.

Doing something for a girlfriend =/= being obligated to help woman stranger because society says so. And I have by the way, though it was a long time ago :P
"A stupid despot may constrain his slaves with iron chains; but a true politician binds them even more strongly with the chain of their own ideas" - Michel Foucault
Magic8000
Posts: 975
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8/4/2013 9:00:40 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/4/2013 5:11:18 PM, tulle wrote:
I don't think chivalry is necessarily a bad thing. Just today Maikuru and I were sitting outside on stone steps and he offered me his sweater to sit on. It's very thoughtful :)

Better love story than Twilight.
404 coherent debate topic not found. Please restart the debate with clear resolution.

"So Magic8000 believes Einstein was a proctologist who was persuaded by the Government and Hitler to fabricate the Theory of Relativity"- GWL-CPA
Andromeda_Z
Posts: 4,151
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8/7/2013 12:25:42 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
I appreciate it, to an extent. It makes a good impression on someone. My boyfriend opened every door and payed for everything at first (and still often does), but over time he learned that I like to take care of him sometimes, too. Sometimes, it isn't chivalry, but just manners. If I see someone struggling to carry something I'd have no trouble with, I'm going to offer to carry it for them, to hell with my gender. And I'll always hold the door open for the person behind me.
Tiffany1billion
Posts: 44
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8/7/2013 2:44:28 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/4/2013 1:37:04 PM, justin.graves wrote:
In light of a recent opinions question in which many people espoused the values of slapping women, what is your take on chivalry. I've literally offered to carry stuff for women before only to be told "I have arms!" Or offered to pay for their lunch "I'm not poor!" Or held the door for them. "What, you think I'm too weak to open a door."

It appears women don't even want chivalry these days. Instead many seem like Skeptikitten, who pretty much says hitting women is OK because they aren't weak. What's your take on this.

I would hope that chivalry never dies. It is never wrong to be courteous or generous, and if you act this way toward everyone,regardless of their gender, you will reap the rewards in the future (probably in the form of an amazing lady). Others will appreciate your kindness or go without because of their own rudeness or misunderstanding.
That said, if a man ever hit ME, there would be swift and definite consequences. The only women I know that "like" to be hit have deep-seeded psychological issues , usually caused by traumatic past experiences. Stay away from these crazies!!
Tiffany
000ike
Posts: 11,196
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8/7/2013 2:55:08 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/7/2013 2:44:28 PM, Tiffany1billion wrote:
At 8/4/2013 1:37:04 PM, justin.graves wrote:
In light of a recent opinions question in which many people espoused the values of slapping women, what is your take on chivalry. I've literally offered to carry stuff for women before only to be told "I have arms!" Or offered to pay for their lunch "I'm not poor!" Or held the door for them. "What, you think I'm too weak to open a door."

It appears women don't even want chivalry these days. Instead many seem like Skeptikitten, who pretty much says hitting women is OK because they aren't weak. What's your take on this.

I would hope that chivalry never dies. It is never wrong to be courteous or generous, and if you act this way toward everyone,regardless of their gender, you will reap the rewards in the future (probably in the form of an amazing lady). Others will appreciate your kindness or go without because of their own rudeness or misunderstanding.
That said, if a man ever hit ME, there would be swift and definite consequences. The only women I know that "like" to be hit have deep-seeded psychological issues , usually caused by traumatic past experiences. Stay away from these crazies!!

Well there's a difference between gender-specific chivalry and indiscriminate kindness - the former being the more sexist. Hopefully you mean the latter when you say "I hope chivalry never dies."
"A stupid despot may constrain his slaves with iron chains; but a true politician binds them even more strongly with the chain of their own ideas" - Michel Foucault
Poetaster
Posts: 587
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8/7/2013 2:57:58 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
If a woman castigates you for holding a door open for her, just apologize and explain that the deed wasn't gender-motivated because you thought she was a man anyway.
"The book you are looking for hasn't been written yet. What you are looking for you are going to have to find yourself, it's not going to be in a book..." -Sidewalker
dylancatlow
Posts: 12,245
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8/7/2013 3:02:34 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/7/2013 2:57:58 PM, Poetaster wrote:
If a woman castigates you for holding a door open for her, just apologize and explain that the deed wasn't gender-motivated because you thought she was a man anyway.

LOL
Tiffany1billion
Posts: 44
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8/7/2013 3:25:56 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/7/2013 2:55:08 PM, 000ike wrote:
At 8/7/2013 2:44:28 PM, Tiffany1billion wrote:
It appears women don't even want chivalry these days. Instead many seem like Skeptikitten, who pretty much says hitting women is OK because they aren't weak. What's your take on this.

I would hope that chivalry never dies. It is never wrong to be courteous or generous, and if you act this way toward everyone,regardless of their gender, you will reap the rewards in the future (probably in the form of an amazing lady). Others will appreciate your kindness or go without because of their own rudeness or misunderstanding.
That said, if a man ever hit ME, there would be swift and definite consequences. The only women I know that "like" to be hit have deep-seeded psychological issues , usually caused by traumatic past experiences. Stay away from these crazies!!

Well there's a difference between gender-specific chivalry and indiscriminate kindness - the former being the more sexist. Hopefully you mean the latter when you say "I hope chivalry never dies."

Absolutely. Chivalry was never intended to be gender-specific, but a code of individual training and service to others.
Tiffany
THE_OPINIONATOR
Posts: 575
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8/7/2013 5:18:31 PM
Posted: 3 years ago
At 8/4/2013 1:37:04 PM, justin.graves wrote:
In light of a recent opinions question in which many people espoused the values of slapping women, what is your take on chivalry. I've literally offered to carry stuff for women before only to be told "I have arms!" Or offered to pay for their lunch "I'm not poor!" Or held the door for them. "What, you think I'm too weak to open a door."

It appears women don't even want chivalry these days. Instead many seem like Skepticism, who pretty much says hitting women is OK because they aren't weak. What's your take on this.

Well considering the fact I do those things for my girlfriend and other girls, I believe that Chivalry will never die. Its the right thing to do, polite really. Hitting women is especially not okay, or hitting anyone that is.
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