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How to let go of anger?

Truth_seeker
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7/6/2014 9:56:17 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
I'm still angry at something that happened. I don't want to be angry anymore, but at times, still feel it. I don't want to be messed withand it 's happened several of times.. Having feelings is hard to let go of because it like grief.. Like someone died.. Mentally, In a blind anger, I wrecked all the feelings.. The passions, the world, the affections, everything for that person and just scream out in agony. I never hurt someone so much in my life.. And it was someone I never planned on hurting before :-( know compassion will help. I just want to move on and start over. Any suggestions?
YYW
Posts: 36,394
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7/6/2014 9:59:27 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/6/2014 9:56:17 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
I'm still angry at something that happened. I don't want to be angry anymore, but at times, still feel it. I don't want to be messed withand it 's happened several of times.. Having feelings is hard to let go of because it like grief.. Like someone died.. Mentally, In a blind anger, I wrecked all the feelings.. The passions, the world, the affections, everything for that person and just scream out in agony. I never hurt someone so much in my life.. And it was someone I never planned on hurting before :-( know compassion will help. I just want to move on and start over. Any suggestions?

What the actual fvck did you do?
Tsar of DDO
ChosenWolff
Posts: 3,361
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7/6/2014 10:14:51 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/6/2014 9:59:27 PM, YYW wrote:
What the actual fvck did you do?
Who said he did anything?
How about NO elections?

#onlyonedeb8
YYW
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7/6/2014 10:16:36 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/6/2014 10:14:51 PM, ChosenWolff wrote:
At 7/6/2014 9:59:27 PM, YYW wrote:
What the actual fvck did you do?
Who said he did anything?

The flying spaghetti monster.
Tsar of DDO
ChosenWolff
Posts: 3,361
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7/6/2014 10:19:15 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/6/2014 10:16:36 PM, YYW wrote:
At 7/6/2014 10:14:51 PM, ChosenWolff wrote:
At 7/6/2014 9:59:27 PM, YYW wrote:
What the actual fvck did you do?
Who said he did anything?

The flying spaghetti monster.
Duh
How about NO elections?

#onlyonedeb8
SPENCERJOYAGE14
Posts: 1,040
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7/6/2014 11:12:53 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/6/2014 9:59:27 PM, YYW wrote:
At 7/6/2014 9:56:17 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
I'm still angry at something that happened. I don't want to be angry anymore, but at times, still feel it. I don't want to be messed withand it 's happened several of times.. Having feelings is hard to let go of because it like grief.. Like someone died.. Mentally, In a blind anger, I wrecked all the feelings.. The passions, the world, the affections, everything for that person and just scream out in agony. I never hurt someone so much in my life.. And it was someone I never planned on hurting before :-( know compassion will help. I just want to move on and start over. Any suggestions?

What the actual fvck did you do?

He yelled at someone.
I'm so fancy, you already know.
SPENCERJOYAGE14
Posts: 1,040
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7/6/2014 11:29:52 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
A wise man once said, "You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger."

In your case this is true. You need to pray, and remember, that "For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction." If you feel angry, go. You will be punished. It will not be beautiful.

Yes, I did quote Newton's third law and Buddha.
I'm so fancy, you already know.
mishapqueen
Posts: 3,995
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7/6/2014 11:31:39 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/6/2014 9:56:17 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
I'm still angry at something that happened. I don't want to be angry anymore, but at times, still feel it. I don't want to be messed withand it 's happened several of times.. Having feelings is hard to let go of because it like grief.. Like someone died.. Mentally, In a blind anger, I wrecked all the feelings.. The passions, the world, the affections, everything for that person and just scream out in agony. I never hurt someone so much in my life.. And it was someone I never planned on hurting before :-( know compassion will help. I just want to move on and start over. Any suggestions?

When I'm angry/upset/distraught I find it helpful to write out my thoughts until I have no more to write. That way I can vent my thoughts and feelings without hurting anyone. Once I have all that junk out of my system, I try to distract myself with something for a little while, and sleep on it. Next morning, I like to evaluate what the next step is, and go ahead with it. A trusted person I can confide in completely also helps me sort through everything. Since I am a Christian, I do a lot of praying, which is a tremendous help.

This method has worked well for me in the past and I hope you find it helpful. I am praying for you.
You cannot choose whether or not you will live by rules, but you can choose which rules you will live by. --Me

"I was wrong. Squirrels are objectively superior to bunnies in every conceivable dimension."
--Joey

"Silence is golden, duct tape is silver" --PetersSmith

Nunc aut Numquam
Truth_seeker
Posts: 1,811
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7/6/2014 11:32:38 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/6/2014 11:29:52 PM, SPENCERJOYAGE14 wrote:
A wise man once said, "You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger."

In your case this is true. You need to pray, and remember, that "For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction." If you feel angry, go. You will be punished. It will not be beautiful.

Yes, I did quote Newton's third law and Buddha.

Wise sayings..
R0b1Billion
Posts: 3,733
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7/7/2014 8:38:46 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/6/2014 11:31:39 PM, mishapqueen wrote:

When I'm angry/upset/distraught I find it helpful to write out my thoughts until I have no more to write. That way I can vent my thoughts and feelings without hurting anyone. Once I have all that junk out of my system, I try to distract myself with something for a little while, and sleep on it. Next morning, I like to evaluate what the next step is, and go ahead with it. A trusted person I can confide in completely also helps me sort through everything. Since I am a Christian, I do a lot of praying, which is a tremendous help.

This method has worked well for me in the past and I hope you find it helpful. I am praying for you.

That's really good advice. Writing out your angry thoughts is excellent because it's a lot easier to maintain stupidity when you don't organize your thoughts on paper and see how marvelously vicious and illogical they are. Sleeping on it's a good idea too, not just because time gives you an opportunity for analysis, but because you won't be so angry the next day!
Beliefs in a nutshell:
- The Ends never justify the Means.
- Objectivity is secondary to subjectivity.
- The War on Drugs is the worst policy in the U.S.
- Most people worship technology as a religion.
- Computers will never become sentient.
Truth_seeker
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7/10/2014 3:57:51 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/7/2014 8:38:46 PM, R0b1Billion wrote:
At 7/6/2014 11:31:39 PM, mishapqueen wrote:

When I'm angry/upset/distraught I find it helpful to write out my thoughts until I have no more to write. That way I can vent my thoughts and feelings without hurting anyone. Once I have all that junk out of my system, I try to distract myself with something for a little while, and sleep on it. Next morning, I like to evaluate what the next step is, and go ahead with it. A trusted person I can confide in completely also helps me sort through everything. Since I am a Christian, I do a lot of praying, which is a tremendous help.

This method has worked well for me in the past and I hope you find it helpful. I am praying for you.

That's really good advice. Writing out your angry thoughts is excellent because it's a lot easier to maintain stupidity when you don't organize your thoughts on paper and see how marvelously vicious and illogical they are. Sleeping on it's a good idea too, not just because time gives you an opportunity for analysis, but because you won't be so angry the next day!

I am afraid my family will see it and know what I have been doing. I need some more healthy ways of expressing anger than venting online.
GodChoosesLife
Posts: 3,461
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7/10/2014 4:38:05 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/10/2014 3:57:51 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
At 7/7/2014 8:38:46 PM, R0b1Billion wrote:
At 7/6/2014 11:31:39 PM, mishapqueen wrote:

When I'm angry/upset/distraught I find it helpful to write out my thoughts until I have no more to write. That way I can vent my thoughts and feelings without hurting anyone. Once I have all that junk out of my system, I try to distract myself with something for a little while, and sleep on it. Next morning, I like to evaluate what the next step is, and go ahead with it. A trusted person I can confide in completely also helps me sort through everything. Since I am a Christian, I do a lot of praying, which is a tremendous help.

This method has worked well for me in the past and I hope you find it helpful. I am praying for you.

That's really good advice. Writing out your angry thoughts is excellent because it's a lot easier to maintain stupidity when you don't organize your thoughts on paper and see how marvelously vicious and illogical they are. Sleeping on it's a good idea too, not just because time gives you an opportunity for analysis, but because you won't be so angry the next day!

I am afraid my family will see it and know what I have been doing. I need some more healthy ways of expressing anger than venting online.

Usually when I'm angry, I go find something constructive to do. Like let's say, clean cause then it gives me focus to clean thoroughly which I do. Or I listen to some music that has good intentional meaning that would give me a reason go listen to the lyrics rather than just the music. Sometimes I just take a step outside and walk around. It's a good idea to get alone when your angry cause then at least when your angry you won't say or do things you'll regret later. Hopefully that helps?
Better than deserved, as ALWAYS.
"The strongest principle of growth lies in human choices."
"The Lord doesn't promise us a perfect life that is free of problems, but he does promise that He'll get us through anything." ~SweeTea
"Good Times" ~ Max
"If Jesus isn't in heaven, then it's not heaven; instead, it's hell." ~anonymous
"Suffering is unimaginably confusing, but it's a way to be drawn closer to God" ~Me
"Tell me what consumes your heart most, and I'll tell you who your God is." ~Dad
Truth_seeker
Posts: 1,811
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7/10/2014 4:42:34 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/10/2014 4:38:05 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/10/2014 3:57:51 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
At 7/7/2014 8:38:46 PM, R0b1Billion wrote:
At 7/6/2014 11:31:39 PM, mishapqueen wrote:

When I'm angry/upset/distraught I find it helpful to write out my thoughts until I have no more to write. That way I can vent my thoughts and feelings without hurting anyone. Once I have all that junk out of my system, I try to distract myself with something for a little while, and sleep on it. Next morning, I like to evaluate what the next step is, and go ahead with it. A trusted person I can confide in completely also helps me sort through everything. Since I am a Christian, I do a lot of praying, which is a tremendous help.

This method has worked well for me in the past and I hope you find it helpful. I am praying for you.

That's really good advice. Writing out your angry thoughts is excellent because it's a lot easier to maintain stupidity when you don't organize your thoughts on paper and see how marvelously vicious and illogical they are. Sleeping on it's a good idea too, not just because time gives you an opportunity for analysis, but because you won't be so angry the next day!

I am afraid my family will see it and know what I have been doing. I need some more healthy ways of expressing anger than venting online.

Usually when I'm angry, I go find something constructive to do. Like let's say, clean cause then it gives me focus to clean thoroughly which I do. Or I listen to some music that has good intentional meaning that would give me a reason go listen to the lyrics rather than just the music. Sometimes I just take a step outside and walk around. It's a good idea to get alone when your angry cause then at least when your angry you won't say or do things you'll regret later. Hopefully that helps?

anything than saying things I regret later is better.
GodChoosesLife
Posts: 3,461
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7/10/2014 4:49:42 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/10/2014 4:42:34 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
At 7/10/2014 4:38:05 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/10/2014 3:57:51 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
At 7/7/2014 8:38:46 PM, R0b1Billion wrote:
At 7/6/2014 11:31:39 PM, mishapqueen wrote:

When I'm angry/upset/distraught I find it helpful to write out my thoughts until I have no more to write. That way I can vent my thoughts and feelings without hurting anyone. Once I have all that junk out of my system, I try to distract myself with something for a little while, and sleep on it. Next morning, I like to evaluate what the next step is, and go ahead with it. A trusted person I can confide in completely also helps me sort through everything. Since I am a Christian, I do a lot of praying, which is a tremendous help.

This method has worked well for me in the past and I hope you find it helpful. I am praying for you.

That's really good advice. Writing out your angry thoughts is excellent because it's a lot easier to maintain stupidity when you don't organize your thoughts on paper and see how marvelously vicious and illogical they are. Sleeping on it's a good idea too, not just because time gives you an opportunity for analysis, but because you won't be so angry the next day!

I am afraid my family will see it and know what I have been doing. I need some more healthy ways of expressing anger than venting online.

Usually when I'm angry, I go find something constructive to do. Like let's say, clean cause then it gives me focus to clean thoroughly which I do. Or I listen to some music that has good intentional meaning that would give me a reason go listen to the lyrics rather than just the music. Sometimes I just take a step outside and walk around. It's a good idea to get alone when your angry cause then at least when your angry you won't say or do things you'll regret later. Hopefully that helps?

anything than saying things I regret later is better.

I think I'm misunderstanding, your okay with saying things? Or no?
Better than deserved, as ALWAYS.
"The strongest principle of growth lies in human choices."
"The Lord doesn't promise us a perfect life that is free of problems, but he does promise that He'll get us through anything." ~SweeTea
"Good Times" ~ Max
"If Jesus isn't in heaven, then it's not heaven; instead, it's hell." ~anonymous
"Suffering is unimaginably confusing, but it's a way to be drawn closer to God" ~Me
"Tell me what consumes your heart most, and I'll tell you who your God is." ~Dad
Truth_seeker
Posts: 1,811
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7/10/2014 4:52:44 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/10/2014 4:49:42 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/10/2014 4:42:34 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
At 7/10/2014 4:38:05 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/10/2014 3:57:51 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
At 7/7/2014 8:38:46 PM, R0b1Billion wrote:
At 7/6/2014 11:31:39 PM, mishapqueen wrote:

When I'm angry/upset/distraught I find it helpful to write out my thoughts until I have no more to write. That way I can vent my thoughts and feelings without hurting anyone. Once I have all that junk out of my system, I try to distract myself with something for a little while, and sleep on it. Next morning, I like to evaluate what the next step is, and go ahead with it. A trusted person I can confide in completely also helps me sort through everything. Since I am a Christian, I do a lot of praying, which is a tremendous help.

This method has worked well for me in the past and I hope you find it helpful. I am praying for you.

That's really good advice. Writing out your angry thoughts is excellent because it's a lot easier to maintain stupidity when you don't organize your thoughts on paper and see how marvelously vicious and illogical they are. Sleeping on it's a good idea too, not just because time gives you an opportunity for analysis, but because you won't be so angry the next day!

I am afraid my family will see it and know what I have been doing. I need some more healthy ways of expressing anger than venting online.

Usually when I'm angry, I go find something constructive to do. Like let's say, clean cause then it gives me focus to clean thoroughly which I do. Or I listen to some music that has good intentional meaning that would give me a reason go listen to the lyrics rather than just the music. Sometimes I just take a step outside and walk around. It's a good idea to get alone when your angry cause then at least when your angry you won't say or do things you'll regret later. Hopefully that helps?

anything than saying things I regret later is better.

I think I'm misunderstanding, your okay with saying things? Or no?

I'm not ok with saying things while I'm mad :-\
GodChoosesLife
Posts: 3,461
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7/10/2014 5:14:02 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/10/2014 4:52:44 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
At 7/10/2014 4:49:42 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/10/2014 4:42:34 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
At 7/10/2014 4:38:05 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/10/2014 3:57:51 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
At 7/7/2014 8:38:46 PM, R0b1Billion wrote:
At 7/6/2014 11:31:39 PM, mishapqueen wrote:

When I'm angry/upset/distraught I find it helpful to write out my thoughts until I have no more to write. That way I can vent my thoughts and feelings without hurting anyone. Once I have all that junk out of my system, I try to distract myself with something for a little while, and sleep on it. Next morning, I like to evaluate what the next step is, and go ahead with it. A trusted person I can confide in completely also helps me sort through everything. Since I am a Christian, I do a lot of praying, which is a tremendous help.

This method has worked well for me in the past and I hope you find it helpful. I am praying for you.

That's really good advice. Writing out your angry thoughts is excellent because it's a lot easier to maintain stupidity when you don't organize your thoughts on paper and see how marvelously vicious and illogical they are. Sleeping on it's a good idea too, not just because time gives you an opportunity for analysis, but because you won't be so angry the next day!

I am afraid my family will see it and know what I have been doing. I need some more healthy ways of expressing anger than venting online.

Usually when I'm angry, I go find something constructive to do. Like let's say, clean cause then it gives me focus to clean thoroughly which I do. Or I listen to some music that has good intentional meaning that would give me a reason go listen to the lyrics rather than just the music. Sometimes I just take a step outside and walk around. It's a good idea to get alone when your angry cause then at least when your angry you won't say or do things you'll regret later. Hopefully that helps?

anything than saying things I regret later is better.

I think I'm misunderstanding, your okay with saying things? Or no?

I'm not ok with saying things while I'm mad :-\

Okay, maybe try doing the things I suggested, maybe?
Better than deserved, as ALWAYS.
"The strongest principle of growth lies in human choices."
"The Lord doesn't promise us a perfect life that is free of problems, but he does promise that He'll get us through anything." ~SweeTea
"Good Times" ~ Max
"If Jesus isn't in heaven, then it's not heaven; instead, it's hell." ~anonymous
"Suffering is unimaginably confusing, but it's a way to be drawn closer to God" ~Me
"Tell me what consumes your heart most, and I'll tell you who your God is." ~Dad
mishapqueen
Posts: 3,995
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7/10/2014 6:19:00 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/10/2014 3:57:51 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
At 7/7/2014 8:38:46 PM, R0b1Billion wrote:
At 7/6/2014 11:31:39 PM, mishapqueen wrote:

When I'm angry/upset/distraught I find it helpful to write out my thoughts until I have no more to write. That way I can vent my thoughts and feelings without hurting anyone. Once I have all that junk out of my system, I try to distract myself with something for a little while, and sleep on it. Next morning, I like to evaluate what the next step is, and go ahead with it. A trusted person I can confide in completely also helps me sort through everything. Since I am a Christian, I do a lot of praying, which is a tremendous help.

This method has worked well for me in the past and I hope you find it helpful. I am praying for you.

That's really good advice. Writing out your angry thoughts is excellent because it's a lot easier to maintain stupidity when you don't organize your thoughts on paper and see how marvelously vicious and illogical they are. Sleeping on it's a good idea too, not just because time gives you an opportunity for analysis, but because you won't be so angry the next day!

I am afraid my family will see it and know what I have been doing. I need some more healthy ways of expressing anger than venting online.

I'm afraid they will see it too, so I make sure I tear it up and throw it away immediately.

I know someone who chopped wood to cope with anger. My brother tears up rags, and my dad goes for a walk or mows the lawn.

According to your profile you are a Christian. Going off of that, there is no better way to cope with it than with prayer. God listens and he doesn't get hurt. If you ask him, he will show you the next step you need to take. He is also more than capable of healing any broken relationship and he would love to help you harness it.

I'm praying for you as you work through all this.
You cannot choose whether or not you will live by rules, but you can choose which rules you will live by. --Me

"I was wrong. Squirrels are objectively superior to bunnies in every conceivable dimension."
--Joey

"Silence is golden, duct tape is silver" --PetersSmith

Nunc aut Numquam
ThoughtsandThoughts
Posts: 178
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7/10/2014 10:16:13 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/6/2014 9:56:17 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
I'm still angry at something that happened. I don't want to be angry anymore, but at times, still feel it. I don't want to be messed withand it 's happened several of times.. Having feelings is hard to let go of because it like grief.. Like someone died.. Mentally, In a blind anger, I wrecked all the feelings.. The passions, the world, the affections, everything for that person and just scream out in agony.


You have a few things to resolve with yourself. One of the biggest things is answering these questions: Can you change what happened? Can you change people? And does it matter if you can't change those people? I've got a few people in my life who irritate me, as most of us do. While they irritate me, I make myself realize that something about everyone actually irritates me, including myself. I make myself more conscious of my own failings when I get upset at others, so I can look at situations more objectively. Remind yourself that you're just as human as other people are.

I never hurt someone so much in my life.. And it was someone I never planned on hurting before :-( know compassion will help. I just want to move on and start over. Any suggestions?


One event does not define you. Try to think about that. Think about the big picture, as corny as it may sound. Do you believe you're an overall good person with some or a lot of troublesome mistakes? If that's so, then you're in the same boat as most humans :)

If you can apologize for what happened, I recommend it. Might be hard, but once you've done it, you've done it. Then you can tell yourself you've apologized. I personally feel that it's better to have one big stupid fight with my family and apologize than a bunch of little fights and never apologize. I really admire my brother because he's not too prideful to apologize whenever he's hurt my feelings or something like that.

I hope that helps! :)
R0b1Billion
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7/10/2014 10:31:03 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/10/2014 3:57:51 PM, Truth_seeker wrote:
At 7/7/2014 8:38:46 PM, R0b1Billion wrote:
At 7/6/2014 11:31:39 PM, mishapqueen wrote:

When I'm angry/upset/distraught I find it helpful to write out my thoughts until I have no more to write. That way I can vent my thoughts and feelings without hurting anyone. Once I have all that junk out of my system, I try to distract myself with something for a little while, and sleep on it. Next morning, I like to evaluate what the next step is, and go ahead with it. A trusted person I can confide in completely also helps me sort through everything. Since I am a Christian, I do a lot of praying, which is a tremendous help.

This method has worked well for me in the past and I hope you find it helpful. I am praying for you.

That's really good advice. Writing out your angry thoughts is excellent because it's a lot easier to maintain stupidity when you don't organize your thoughts on paper and see how marvelously vicious and illogical they are. Sleeping on it's a good idea too, not just because time gives you an opportunity for analysis, but because you won't be so angry the next day!

I am afraid my family will see it and know what I have been doing. I need some more healthy ways of expressing anger than venting online.

Know what you have been doing? Are you ashamed of your thoughts or actions?

The mark was put upon Cain so that others could judge him for his actions. But the moral of the story isn't that you should fear being marked, it's that you should feel comfortable putting your sins out into the open where they can be resolved. If you hide them inside you are not only doomed to repeating them, but they will eat at you and destroy you from within. You must have faith that you will withstand judgments from others and that they will only hurt themselves by choosing to judge you. You are bringing calamity onto yourself and only you can stop hurting yourself.
Beliefs in a nutshell:
- The Ends never justify the Means.
- Objectivity is secondary to subjectivity.
- The War on Drugs is the worst policy in the U.S.
- Most people worship technology as a religion.
- Computers will never become sentient.