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Personal slave wanted - position starts ASAP

Blade-of-Truth
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7/13/2014 2:56:15 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
Official Job Title: Personal Slave.

I am in dire need of a full-time slave. Obviously there will be no pay. You will need to collect your own food from the fields. Insects are high in protein, so you should be able to manage. Your sleeping quarters will be the ground space between my car and the floor in the garage. I figure the car being over you will be adequate cover from the outside elements. You must refer to me as Master, Lord, or Savior. As I will be all three of those things to you. I do not discriminate between skin colors - that's racist. I will accept slaves of every race and nationality. You are also not allowed to play with my cats, they have feline AIDS and will bite you. If they bite you anyways, that's probably a sign that God doesn't love you. I also have a strict - whip only policy meaning you need not worry about harsh punishment. Everyone enjoys a good whipping. This job position will be a minimum of a 10 year commitment.

I think that covers everything. Food, Shelter, Pay, and Place. Yup. So, please feel free to inbox me with your acceptance of this position if you desire to do so.
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YYW
Posts: 36,322
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7/13/2014 2:59:02 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 2:56:15 PM, Blade-of-Truth wrote:
Official Job Title: Personal Slave.

I am in dire need of a full-time slave. Obviously there will be no pay. You will need to collect your own food from the fields. Insects are high in protein, so you should be able to manage. Your sleeping quarters will be the ground space between my car and the floor in the garage. I figure the car being over you will be adequate cover from the outside elements. You must refer to me as Master, Lord, or Savior. As I will be all three of those things to you. I do not discriminate between skin colors - that's racist. I will accept slaves of every race and nationality. You are also not allowed to play with my cats, they have feline AIDS and will bite you. If they bite you anyways, that's probably a sign that God doesn't love you. I also have a strict - whip only policy meaning you need not worry about harsh punishment. Everyone enjoys a good whipping. This job position will be a minimum of a 10 year commitment.

I think that covers everything. Food, Shelter, Pay, and Place. Yup. So, please feel free to inbox me with your acceptance of this position if you desire to do so.

Kinky...
Tsar of DDO
Romanii
Posts: 4,855
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7/13/2014 3:26:38 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 2:56:15 PM, Blade-of-Truth wrote:
Official Job Title: Personal Slave.

I am in dire need of a full-time slave. Obviously there will be no pay. You will need to collect your own food from the fields. Insects are high in protein, so you should be able to manage. Your sleeping quarters will be the ground space between my car and the floor in the garage. I figure the car being over you will be adequate cover from the outside elements. You must refer to me as Master, Lord, or Savior. As I will be all three of those things to you. I do not discriminate between skin colors - that's racist. I will accept slaves of every race and nationality. You are also not allowed to play with my cats, they have feline AIDS and will bite you. If they bite you anyways, that's probably a sign that God doesn't love you. I also have a strict - whip only policy meaning you need not worry about harsh punishment. Everyone enjoys a good whipping. This job position will be a minimum of a 10 year commitment.

I think that covers everything. Food, Shelter, Pay, and Place. Yup. So, please feel free to inbox me with your acceptance of this position if you desire to do so.

I would like to accept, but I feel that I may be under-qualified...
Blade-of-Truth
Posts: 5,036
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7/13/2014 3:36:08 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 3:26:38 PM, Romanii wrote:
At 7/13/2014 2:56:15 PM, Blade-of-Truth wrote:
Official Job Title: Personal Slave.

I am in dire need of a full-time slave. Obviously there will be no pay. You will need to collect your own food from the fields. Insects are high in protein, so you should be able to manage. Your sleeping quarters will be the ground space between my car and the floor in the garage. I figure the car being over you will be adequate cover from the outside elements. You must refer to me as Master, Lord, or Savior. As I will be all three of those things to you. I do not discriminate between skin colors - that's racist. I will accept slaves of every race and nationality. You are also not allowed to play with my cats, they have feline AIDS and will bite you. If they bite you anyways, that's probably a sign that God doesn't love you. I also have a strict - whip only policy meaning you need not worry about harsh punishment. Everyone enjoys a good whipping. This job position will be a minimum of a 10 year commitment.

I think that covers everything. Food, Shelter, Pay, and Place. Yup. So, please feel free to inbox me with your acceptance of this position if you desire to do so.

I would like to accept, but I feel that I may be under-qualified...

I would allow you to be my slave... and since it's you - I'll allow you to have one blanket while sleeping under the car.
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Romanii
Posts: 4,855
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7/13/2014 3:42:11 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 3:36:08 PM, Blade-of-Truth wrote:
At 7/13/2014 3:26:38 PM, Romanii wrote:
At 7/13/2014 2:56:15 PM, Blade-of-Truth wrote:
Official Job Title: Personal Slave.

I am in dire need of a full-time slave. Obviously there will be no pay. You will need to collect your own food from the fields. Insects are high in protein, so you should be able to manage. Your sleeping quarters will be the ground space between my car and the floor in the garage. I figure the car being over you will be adequate cover from the outside elements. You must refer to me as Master, Lord, or Savior. As I will be all three of those things to you. I do not discriminate between skin colors - that's racist. I will accept slaves of every race and nationality. You are also not allowed to play with my cats, they have feline AIDS and will bite you. If they bite you anyways, that's probably a sign that God doesn't love you. I also have a strict - whip only policy meaning you need not worry about harsh punishment. Everyone enjoys a good whipping. This job position will be a minimum of a 10 year commitment.

I think that covers everything. Food, Shelter, Pay, and Place. Yup. So, please feel free to inbox me with your acceptance of this position if you desire to do so.

I would like to accept, but I feel that I may be under-qualified...

I would allow you to be my slave... and since it's you - I'll allow you to have one blanket while sleeping under the car.

You are truly the epitome of benevolence, good Master. Has anyone ever heard of such compassion? Such empathy? It is impossible to even contemplate the vast and glorious kindness you show to us dust mites. Please cast a single glance in my direction so that I may live under the delusion that my life has some sort of value!
Blade-of-Truth
Posts: 5,036
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7/13/2014 3:56:07 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 3:42:11 PM, Romanii wrote:
At 7/13/2014 3:36:08 PM, Blade-of-Truth wrote:
At 7/13/2014 3:26:38 PM, Romanii wrote:
At 7/13/2014 2:56:15 PM, Blade-of-Truth wrote:
Official Job Title: Personal Slave.

I am in dire need of a full-time slave. Obviously there will be no pay. You will need to collect your own food from the fields. Insects are high in protein, so you should be able to manage. Your sleeping quarters will be the ground space between my car and the floor in the garage. I figure the car being over you will be adequate cover from the outside elements. You must refer to me as Master, Lord, or Savior. As I will be all three of those things to you. I do not discriminate between skin colors - that's racist. I will accept slaves of every race and nationality. You are also not allowed to play with my cats, they have feline AIDS and will bite you. If they bite you anyways, that's probably a sign that God doesn't love you. I also have a strict - whip only policy meaning you need not worry about harsh punishment. Everyone enjoys a good whipping. This job position will be a minimum of a 10 year commitment.

I think that covers everything. Food, Shelter, Pay, and Place. Yup. So, please feel free to inbox me with your acceptance of this position if you desire to do so.

I would like to accept, but I feel that I may be under-qualified...

I would allow you to be my slave... and since it's you - I'll allow you to have one blanket while sleeping under the car.

You are truly the epitome of benevolence, good Master. Has anyone ever heard of such compassion? Such empathy? It is impossible to even contemplate the vast and glorious kindness you show to us dust mites. Please cast a single glance in my direction so that I may live under the delusion that my life has some sort of value!

My son, you have my blessings. I am the Lord of Light, and shall share all my land's prosperity with those who work my fields. You will be met with worldly pleasures such as access to fresh water whenever you please, and shall have eternal glory in my every lasting kingdom.
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GodChoosesLife
Posts: 3,461
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7/13/2014 4:52:28 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 2:56:15 PM, Blade-of-Truth wrote:
Official Job Title: Personal Slave.

I am in dire need of a full-time slave. Obviously there will be no pay. You will need to collect your own food from the fields. Insects are high in protein, so you should be able to manage. Your sleeping quarters will be the ground space between my car and the floor in the garage. I figure the car being over you will be adequate cover from the outside elements. You must refer to me as Master, Lord, or Savior. As I will be all three of those things to you. I do not discriminate between skin colors - that's racist. I will accept slaves of every race and nationality. You are also not allowed to play with my cats, they have feline AIDS and will bite you. If they bite you anyways, that's probably a sign that God doesn't love you. I also have a strict - whip only policy meaning you need not worry about harsh punishment. Everyone enjoys a good whipping. This job position will be a minimum of a 10 year commitment.

I think that covers everything. Food, Shelter, Pay, and Place. Yup. So, please feel free to inbox me with your acceptance of this position if you desire to do so.

0.o what is this?
Better than deserved, as ALWAYS.
"The strongest principle of growth lies in human choices."
"The Lord doesn't promise us a perfect life that is free of problems, but he does promise that He'll get us through anything." ~SweeTea
"Good Times" ~ Max
"If Jesus isn't in heaven, then it's not heaven; instead, it's hell." ~anonymous
"Suffering is unimaginably confusing, but it's a way to be drawn closer to God" ~Me
"Tell me what consumes your heart most, and I'll tell you who your God is." ~Dad
bluesteel
Posts: 12,301
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7/13/2014 4:58:41 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 4:52:28 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/13/2014 2:56:15 PM, Blade-of-Truth wrote:
Official Job Title: Personal Slave.

I am in dire need of a full-time slave. Obviously there will be no pay. You will need to collect your own food from the fields. Insects are high in protein, so you should be able to manage. Your sleeping quarters will be the ground space between my car and the floor in the garage. I figure the car being over you will be adequate cover from the outside elements. You must refer to me as Master, Lord, or Savior. As I will be all three of those things to you. I do not discriminate between skin colors - that's racist. I will accept slaves of every race and nationality. You are also not allowed to play with my cats, they have feline AIDS and will bite you. If they bite you anyways, that's probably a sign that God doesn't love you. I also have a strict - whip only policy meaning you need not worry about harsh punishment. Everyone enjoys a good whipping. This job position will be a minimum of a 10 year commitment.

I think that covers everything. Food, Shelter, Pay, and Place. Yup. So, please feel free to inbox me with your acceptance of this position if you desire to do so.

0.o what is this?

lol, are you saying you're interested in applying and want more details?
You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into - Jonathan Swift (paraphrase)
GodChoosesLife
Posts: 3,461
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7/13/2014 4:59:27 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 4:58:41 PM, bluesteel wrote:
At 7/13/2014 4:52:28 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/13/2014 2:56:15 PM, Blade-of-Truth wrote:
Official Job Title: Personal Slave.

I am in dire need of a full-time slave. Obviously there will be no pay. You will need to collect your own food from the fields. Insects are high in protein, so you should be able to manage. Your sleeping quarters will be the ground space between my car and the floor in the garage. I figure the car being over you will be adequate cover from the outside elements. You must refer to me as Master, Lord, or Savior. As I will be all three of those things to you. I do not discriminate between skin colors - that's racist. I will accept slaves of every race and nationality. You are also not allowed to play with my cats, they have feline AIDS and will bite you. If they bite you anyways, that's probably a sign that God doesn't love you. I also have a strict - whip only policy meaning you need not worry about harsh punishment. Everyone enjoys a good whipping. This job position will be a minimum of a 10 year commitment.

I think that covers everything. Food, Shelter, Pay, and Place. Yup. So, please feel free to inbox me with your acceptance of this position if you desire to do so.

0.o what is this?

lol, are you saying you're interested in applying and want more details?

-_- no!
Better than deserved, as ALWAYS.
"The strongest principle of growth lies in human choices."
"The Lord doesn't promise us a perfect life that is free of problems, but he does promise that He'll get us through anything." ~SweeTea
"Good Times" ~ Max
"If Jesus isn't in heaven, then it's not heaven; instead, it's hell." ~anonymous
"Suffering is unimaginably confusing, but it's a way to be drawn closer to God" ~Me
"Tell me what consumes your heart most, and I'll tell you who your God is." ~Dad
bluesteel
Posts: 12,301
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7/13/2014 5:03:35 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 4:59:27 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/13/2014 4:58:41 PM, bluesteel wrote:
At 7/13/2014 4:52:28 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/13/2014 2:56:15 PM, Blade-of-Truth wrote:
Official Job Title: Personal Slave.

I am in dire need of a full-time slave. Obviously there will be no pay. You will need to collect your own food from the fields. Insects are high in protein, so you should be able to manage. Your sleeping quarters will be the ground space between my car and the floor in the garage. I figure the car being over you will be adequate cover from the outside elements. You must refer to me as Master, Lord, or Savior. As I will be all three of those things to you. I do not discriminate between skin colors - that's racist. I will accept slaves of every race and nationality. You are also not allowed to play with my cats, they have feline AIDS and will bite you. If they bite you anyways, that's probably a sign that God doesn't love you. I also have a strict - whip only policy meaning you need not worry about harsh punishment. Everyone enjoys a good whipping. This job position will be a minimum of a 10 year commitment.

I think that covers everything. Food, Shelter, Pay, and Place. Yup. So, please feel free to inbox me with your acceptance of this position if you desire to do so.

0.o what is this?

lol, are you saying you're interested in applying and want more details?

-_- no!

Fair enough. But you're gonna be BoT's wife, which is the same position, with a slightly longer time period.
You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into - Jonathan Swift (paraphrase)
ESocialBookworm
Posts: 14,367
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7/13/2014 5:04:34 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 5:03:35 PM, bluesteel wrote:
At 7/13/2014 4:59:27 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/13/2014 4:58:41 PM, bluesteel wrote:
At 7/13/2014 4:52:28 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/13/2014 2:56:15 PM, Blade-of-Truth wrote:
Official Job Title: Personal Slave.

I am in dire need of a full-time slave. Obviously there will be no pay. You will need to collect your own food from the fields. Insects are high in protein, so you should be able to manage. Your sleeping quarters will be the ground space between my car and the floor in the garage. I figure the car being over you will be adequate cover from the outside elements. You must refer to me as Master, Lord, or Savior. As I will be all three of those things to you. I do not discriminate between skin colors - that's racist. I will accept slaves of every race and nationality. You are also not allowed to play with my cats, they have feline AIDS and will bite you. If they bite you anyways, that's probably a sign that God doesn't love you. I also have a strict - whip only policy meaning you need not worry about harsh punishment. Everyone enjoys a good whipping. This job position will be a minimum of a 10 year commitment.

I think that covers everything. Food, Shelter, Pay, and Place. Yup. So, please feel free to inbox me with your acceptance of this position if you desire to do so.

0.o what is this?

lol, are you saying you're interested in applying and want more details?

-_- no!

Fair enough. But you're gonna be BoT's wife, which is the same position, with a slightly longer time period.

No she isn't.
Solonkr~
I don't care about whether an ideology is "necessary" or not,
I care about how to solve problems,
which is what everyone else should also care about.

Ken~
In essence, the world is fucked up and you can either ignore it, become cynical or bitter about it.

Me~
"BAILEY + SOLON = SAILEY
MY SHIP SAILEY MUST SAIL"

SCREW THAT SHIZ #BANNIE = BAILEY & ANNIE

P.S. Shipped Sailey before it was cannon bitches.
GodChoosesLife
Posts: 3,461
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7/13/2014 5:07:28 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 5:03:35 PM, bluesteel wrote:
At 7/13/2014 4:59:27 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/13/2014 4:58:41 PM, bluesteel wrote:
At 7/13/2014 4:52:28 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/13/2014 2:56:15 PM, Blade-of-Truth wrote:
Official Job Title: Personal Slave.

I am in dire need of a full-time slave. Obviously there will be no pay. You will need to collect your own food from the fields. Insects are high in protein, so you should be able to manage. Your sleeping quarters will be the ground space between my car and the floor in the garage. I figure the car being over you will be adequate cover from the outside elements. You must refer to me as Master, Lord, or Savior. As I will be all three of those things to you. I do not discriminate between skin colors - that's racist. I will accept slaves of every race and nationality. You are also not allowed to play with my cats, they have feline AIDS and will bite you. If they bite you anyways, that's probably a sign that God doesn't love you. I also have a strict - whip only policy meaning you need not worry about harsh punishment. Everyone enjoys a good whipping. This job position will be a minimum of a 10 year commitment.

I think that covers everything. Food, Shelter, Pay, and Place. Yup. So, please feel free to inbox me with your acceptance of this position if you desire to do so.

0.o what is this?

lol, are you saying you're interested in applying and want more details?

-_- no!

Fair enough. But you're gonna be BoT's wife, which is the same position, with a slightly longer time period.

Uhhhhh wait... What?... Did I miss something here??? 0.o
Better than deserved, as ALWAYS.
"The strongest principle of growth lies in human choices."
"The Lord doesn't promise us a perfect life that is free of problems, but he does promise that He'll get us through anything." ~SweeTea
"Good Times" ~ Max
"If Jesus isn't in heaven, then it's not heaven; instead, it's hell." ~anonymous
"Suffering is unimaginably confusing, but it's a way to be drawn closer to God" ~Me
"Tell me what consumes your heart most, and I'll tell you who your God is." ~Dad
bluesteel
Posts: 12,301
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7/13/2014 5:10:12 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 5:07:28 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:

Fair enough. But you're gonna be BoT's wife, which is the same position, with a slightly longer time period.

Uhhhhh wait... What?... Did I miss something here??? 0.o

Surprised you forgot this one.... You really are prone to blackouts.... You publicly said (in a youtube video) that if he proposed to you, you'd say yes. You don't remember this???
You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into - Jonathan Swift (paraphrase)
GodChoosesLife
Posts: 3,461
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7/13/2014 5:12:05 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 5:10:12 PM, bluesteel wrote:
At 7/13/2014 5:07:28 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:

Fair enough. But you're gonna be BoT's wife, which is the same position, with a slightly longer time period.

Uhhhhh wait... What?... Did I miss something here??? 0.o

Surprised you forgot this one.... You really are prone to blackouts.... You publicly said (in a youtube video) that if he proposed to you, you'd say yes. You don't remember this???
No I didn't?,..
Better than deserved, as ALWAYS.
"The strongest principle of growth lies in human choices."
"The Lord doesn't promise us a perfect life that is free of problems, but he does promise that He'll get us through anything." ~SweeTea
"Good Times" ~ Max
"If Jesus isn't in heaven, then it's not heaven; instead, it's hell." ~anonymous
"Suffering is unimaginably confusing, but it's a way to be drawn closer to God" ~Me
"Tell me what consumes your heart most, and I'll tell you who your God is." ~Dad
bluesteel
Posts: 12,301
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7/13/2014 5:13:12 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 5:12:05 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/13/2014 5:10:12 PM, bluesteel wrote:
At 7/13/2014 5:07:28 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:

Fair enough. But you're gonna be BoT's wife, which is the same position, with a slightly longer time period.

Uhhhhh wait... What?... Did I miss something here??? 0.o

Surprised you forgot this one.... You really are prone to blackouts.... You publicly said (in a youtube video) that if he proposed to you, you'd say yes. You don't remember this???
No I didn't?,..

Ahh too bad you don't remember. How's your puppy doing?
You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into - Jonathan Swift (paraphrase)
GodChoosesLife
Posts: 3,461
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7/13/2014 5:14:34 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 5:13:12 PM, bluesteel wrote:
At 7/13/2014 5:12:05 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/13/2014 5:10:12 PM, bluesteel wrote:
At 7/13/2014 5:07:28 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:

Fair enough. But you're gonna be BoT's wife, which is the same position, with a slightly longer time period.

Uhhhhh wait... What?... Did I miss something here??? 0.o

Surprised you forgot this one.... You really are prone to blackouts.... You publicly said (in a youtube video) that if he proposed to you, you'd say yes. You don't remember this???
No I didn't?,..

Ahh too bad you don't remember. How's your puppy doing?

Stop trolling me kid... -_-
Better than deserved, as ALWAYS.
"The strongest principle of growth lies in human choices."
"The Lord doesn't promise us a perfect life that is free of problems, but he does promise that He'll get us through anything." ~SweeTea
"Good Times" ~ Max
"If Jesus isn't in heaven, then it's not heaven; instead, it's hell." ~anonymous
"Suffering is unimaginably confusing, but it's a way to be drawn closer to God" ~Me
"Tell me what consumes your heart most, and I'll tell you who your God is." ~Dad
Blade-of-Truth
Posts: 5,036
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7/13/2014 5:39:52 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 7/13/2014 4:52:28 PM, GodChoosesLife wrote:
At 7/13/2014 2:56:15 PM, Blade-of-Truth wrote:
Official Job Title: Personal Slave.

I am in dire need of a full-time slave. Obviously there will be no pay. You will need to collect your own food from the fields. Insects are high in protein, so you should be able to manage. Your sleeping quarters will be the ground space between my car and the floor in the garage. I figure the car being over you will be adequate cover from the outside elements. You must refer to me as Master, Lord, or Savior. As I will be all three of those things to you. I do not discriminate between skin colors - that's racist. I will accept slaves of every race and nationality. You are also not allowed to play with my cats, they have feline AIDS and will bite you. If they bite you anyways, that's probably a sign that God doesn't love you. I also have a strict - whip only policy meaning you need not worry about harsh punishment. Everyone enjoys a good whipping. This job position will be a minimum of a 10 year commitment.

I think that covers everything. Food, Shelter, Pay, and Place. Yup. So, please feel free to inbox me with your acceptance of this position if you desire to do so.

0.o what is this?

It is my advertisement for a personal slave. I need one to work my fields.

But I could never use you as a slave, you'd be my queen. We'd sit in our rocking-chairs and bask in the cool breeze as Romanii works the fields.
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