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ESocialBookworm
Posts: 14,361
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10/21/2014 10:59:36 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
So we were discussing Thomas Hardy's Hap in school, and this girl (who tells EVERYONE she has a boyfriend in Canada who's the love of her life... and older & a relative) said that if Gof took away the person she loved, she's stop believing in him.

So I told her, death is inevitable. I then asked her if God asked her to sacrifice her love, what she would do. She told me she'd rather sacrifice herself. I told her that wasn't the question. I said what if God asked her to sacrifice her love, like her asked our (Muslim's) prophet to sacrifice his son. She flipped and said she didnt wanna talk about it anymore.

On turning around, the girl sitting next to me- Amy, one of my good friends- told me, "I haven't prayed since February when daddy died. It's not that easy."

There were many things I could've done, or said against what she said, but they all died in my throat because I didn't want to be apathetic, and she was pretty emotional.

What was the correct thing to say or do in this situation.
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mishapqueen
Posts: 3,995
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10/21/2014 11:03:10 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 10/21/2014 10:59:36 PM, ESocialBookworm wrote:
So we were discussing Thomas Hardy's Hap in school, and this girl (who tells EVERYONE she has a boyfriend in Canada who's the love of her life... and older & a relative) said that if Gof took away the person she loved, she's stop believing in him.

So I told her, death is inevitable. I then asked her if God asked her to sacrifice her love, what she would do. She told me she'd rather sacrifice herself. I told her that wasn't the question. I said what if God asked her to sacrifice her love, like her asked our (Muslim's) prophet to sacrifice his son. She flipped and said she didnt wanna talk about it anymore.

On turning around, the girl sitting next to me- Amy, one of my good friends- told me, "I haven't prayed since February when daddy died. It's not that easy."

There were many things I could've done, or said against what she said, but they all died in my throat because I didn't want to be apathetic, and she was pretty emotional.

What was the correct thing to say or do in this situation.

Give her a hug and tell her you love her and that you are for her. That's all that's really necessary. She needs love and a friend, not a lecture on prayer.
You cannot choose whether or not you will live by rules, but you can choose which rules you will live by. --Me

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bsh1
Posts: 27,503
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10/21/2014 11:12:03 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 10/21/2014 11:03:10 PM, mishapqueen wrote:
At 10/21/2014 10:59:36 PM, ESocialBookworm wrote:
So we were discussing Thomas Hardy's Hap in school, and this girl (who tells EVERYONE she has a boyfriend in Canada who's the love of her life... and older & a relative) said that if Gof took away the person she loved, she's stop believing in him.

So I told her, death is inevitable. I then asked her if God asked her to sacrifice her love, what she would do. She told me she'd rather sacrifice herself. I told her that wasn't the question. I said what if God asked her to sacrifice her love, like her asked our (Muslim's) prophet to sacrifice his son. She flipped and said she didnt wanna talk about it anymore.

On turning around, the girl sitting next to me- Amy, one of my good friends- told me, "I haven't prayed since February when daddy died. It's not that easy."

There were many things I could've done, or said against what she said, but they all died in my throat because I didn't want to be apathetic, and she was pretty emotional.

What was the correct thing to say or do in this situation.

Give her a hug and tell her you love her and that you are for her. That's all that's really necessary. She needs love and a friend, not a lecture on prayer.

^ This.
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bsh1
Posts: 27,503
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10/21/2014 11:13:14 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
But really, I am skeptical of all formal religions, so perhaps I am not the best one to consult on this topic. I wouldn't ever encourage anyone to pray, but at the same time, I would never discourage anyone from doing it (unless it was in a public school or government building.)
Live Long and Prosper

I'm a Bish.


"Twilight isn't just about obtuse metaphors between cannibalism and premarital sex, it also teaches us the futility of hope." - Raisor

"[Bsh1] is the Guinan of DDO." - ButterCatX

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PotBelliedGeek
Posts: 4,298
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10/21/2014 11:42:10 PM
Posted: 2 years ago
At 10/21/2014 10:59:36 PM, ESocialBookworm wrote:
So we were discussing Thomas Hardy's Hap in school, and this girl (who tells EVERYONE she has a boyfriend in Canada who's the love of her life... and older & a relative) said that if Gof took away the person she loved, she's stop believing in him.

So I told her, death is inevitable. I then asked her if God asked her to sacrifice her love, what she would do. She told me she'd rather sacrifice herself. I told her that wasn't the question. I said what if God asked her to sacrifice her love, like her asked our (Muslim's) prophet to sacrifice his son. She flipped and said she didnt wanna talk about it anymore.

On turning around, the girl sitting next to me- Amy, one of my good friends- told me, "I haven't prayed since February when daddy died. It's not that easy."

There were many things I could've done, or said against what she said, but they all died in my throat because I didn't want to be apathetic, and she was pretty emotional.

What was the correct thing to say or do in this situation.

You give her emotional support. Severely traumatizing events often lead to a loss in faith, as a result of deep emotional instability. The last thing you should ever do in that situation is try to preach. I know this from experience. I went through some really tough sh!t as a kid, things most people never even dream of. I lost faith. A lot of faith. The religious community responded by first preaching to me, then ostracizing me. The sort of thing can just about break a person.
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