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Alcoholic Judging

Defro
Posts: 847
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1/1/2015 10:22:06 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
Should we judge our friends for what they have done while drunk?
Many people think we shouldn't judge one's actions while intoxicated, but isn't there a line that can't be crossed?
What if what they did while drunk makes you extremely upset? Should you forgive them, knowing they were drunk, or are you justified to judge them?
AnDoctuir
Posts: 11,060
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1/1/2015 10:32:33 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
Intoxication is a medium, and, as such, how a person acts when intoxicated says a lot about them. I don't think so, though, no. Drunk people don't do things in spite, but to meet their demons. It's a tough question.
AnDoctuir
Posts: 11,060
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1/1/2015 10:34:46 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
So much of the wrong we do is empty, just to see what it is. ---Monkey see, monkey do, ya know? And I know that can hardly make sense, but it's the truth of things.
AnDoctuir
Posts: 11,060
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1/1/2015 10:38:11 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 1/1/2015 10:34:46 AM, AnDoctuir wrote:
So much of the wrong we do is empty, just to see what it is. ---Monkey see, monkey do, ya know? And I know that can hardly make sense, but it's the truth of things.

And intoxication is a popular medium for this dynamic. As if to partake of it in the dark recesses of one's mind or to have deniability or something. Honestly, I have a good few friends who have killed people while drunk. Whispering into my ear ever since the hope that we're all just animals. I don't judge. I get mad, but it passes.
PetersSmith
Posts: 5,859
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1/1/2015 10:49:05 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 1/1/2015 10:22:06 AM, Defro wrote:
Should we judge our friends for what they have done while drunk?
Many people think we shouldn't judge one's actions while intoxicated, but isn't there a line that can't be crossed?
What if what they did while drunk makes you extremely upset? Should you forgive them, knowing they were drunk, or are you justified to judge them?

I would judge them for getting drunk in the first place.
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AnDoctuir
Posts: 11,060
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1/1/2015 10:53:41 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
Meh. A lot of people get drunk as a sort of obeisance. Alcohol doesn't really change a person. The person just uses it to do something.
Ore_Ele
Posts: 25,980
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1/1/2015 4:39:31 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 1/1/2015 10:22:06 AM, Defro wrote:
Should we judge our friends for what they have done while drunk?
Many people think we shouldn't judge one's actions while intoxicated, but isn't there a line that can't be crossed?
What if what they did while drunk makes you extremely upset? Should you forgive them, knowing they were drunk, or are you justified to judge them?

It is always helpful to be able to forgive, but simply saying "I was drunk" does not excuse what is done. Those actions should be viewed seperately from sober actions, but not just ignored.
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ESocialBookworm
Posts: 14,373
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1/1/2015 5:14:14 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 1/1/2015 10:22:06 AM, Defro wrote:
Should we judge our friends for what they have done while drunk?
Not really.
Many people think we shouldn't judge one's actions while intoxicated, but isn't there a line that can't be crossed?
What if what they did while drunk makes you extremely upset? Should you forgive them, knowing they were drunk, or are you justified to judge them?
Yeah.
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PeacefulChaos
Posts: 2,610
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1/1/2015 6:12:02 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 1/1/2015 10:22:06 AM, Defro wrote:
Should we judge our friends for what they have done while drunk?
Many people think we shouldn't judge one's actions while intoxicated, but isn't there a line that can't be crossed?
What if what they did while drunk makes you extremely upset? Should you forgive them, knowing they were drunk, or are you justified to judge them?

I don't think it's right to judge people, but I also think that it's not good to become drunk in the first place.

If someone did something that made me extremely upset while they were drunk and it became a problem, I would probably judge them as a natural reaction. I would try to quell it and keep it to myself, but as I'm only human I'd end up doing it anyway.

More importantly, I think if it becomes a serious problem it's important to consult with your friends about alcoholism in a kind manner, or at least try to help them out in some way or another. Because when people are drunk, they may do things that they normally wouldn't want to do, and it's important we understand that.
Ore_Ele
Posts: 25,980
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1/1/2015 6:15:20 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 1/1/2015 6:12:02 PM, PeacefulChaos wrote:
At 1/1/2015 10:22:06 AM, Defro wrote:
Should we judge our friends for what they have done while drunk?
Many people think we shouldn't judge one's actions while intoxicated, but isn't there a line that can't be crossed?
What if what they did while drunk makes you extremely upset? Should you forgive them, knowing they were drunk, or are you justified to judge them?

I don't think it's right to judge people,

I'm curios to how you can support such an ideology. If you think that judging is wrong, isn't that an act of judging?

but I also think that it's not good to become drunk in the first place.

If someone did something that made me extremely upset while they were drunk and it became a problem, I would probably judge them as a natural reaction. I would try to quell it and keep it to myself, but as I'm only human I'd end up doing it anyway.

More importantly, I think if it becomes a serious problem it's important to consult with your friends about alcoholism in a kind manner, or at least try to help them out in some way or another. Because when people are drunk, they may do things that they normally wouldn't want to do, and it's important we understand that.
"Wanting Red Rhino Pill to have gender"
PeacefulChaos
Posts: 2,610
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1/1/2015 7:33:41 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 1/1/2015 6:15:20 PM, Ore_Ele wrote:
At 1/1/2015 6:12:02 PM, PeacefulChaos wrote:
At 1/1/2015 10:22:06 AM, Defro wrote:
Should we judge our friends for what they have done while drunk?
Many people think we shouldn't judge one's actions while intoxicated, but isn't there a line that can't be crossed?
What if what they did while drunk makes you extremely upset? Should you forgive them, knowing they were drunk, or are you justified to judge them?

I don't think it's right to judge people,

I'm curios to how you can support such an ideology. If you think that judging is wrong, isn't that an act of judging?

I think it's wrong for me to judge other people, and if I should make judgements, then I should keep them to myself. Gossip and backbiting are somethings that I've always been taught to avoid due to their detrimental nature, and my experiences have confirmed what I've been taught.

I'm only human, of course, and because of that I realize that I'm not perfect and that I'm going to end up making internal judgements, or I might be so upset or angry that I might start talking badly of another person. I try to quell that behavior, though.

Because these are my beliefs, I also might end up judging other people who are judging, if you get what I mean. Whenever friends gossip about other people, I try not to engage or I try to change topics, but I end up internally thinking about how bad it is to talk behind someone's back. Of course, this is a judgement of their judgements, but as I said, I'm not perfect. I just try to do the best I can and not judge people to the best of my ability. I might end up doing it internally, but instead of judging I try focusing on people's positive attributes. It leads to better friendships and less negativity, in my experience.

In sum, I try following the advice of this quote, which puts it quite nicely: "If a man has ten good qualities and one bad one, to look at the ten and forget the one; and if a man has ten bad qualities and one good one, to look at the one and forget the ten."
Defro
Posts: 847
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1/2/2015 12:19:44 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 1/1/2015 10:54:58 AM, AnDoctuir wrote:
Why do you guys have to be so depressing?

Sorry. I didn't intend to come across as depressing. I was genuinely curious as to what other people think about it.

I have friends who I love but absolutely hate when they are drunk. It makes me confused and I'm no longer sure about how I feel about them.
YYW
Posts: 36,391
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1/2/2015 9:15:57 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 1/1/2015 10:22:06 AM, Defro wrote:
Should we judge our friends for what they have done while drunk?

It depends what they've done. There are some things I might forgive... other things I wouldn't.

If I told someone something in confidence, and they broke that confidence while drunk, I would probably not forgive that.

If someone was drunk and they went on a psychotic rant/rampage that hurt me or others where what they did was decidedly malicious, I wouldn't forgive that either.

Many people think we shouldn't judge one's actions while intoxicated, but isn't there a line that can't be crossed?

There is a line, and people who think that being drunk excuses shitty behavior are wrong. You are 100% responsible for all the things you do whether drunk or sober.

What if what they did while drunk makes you extremely upset? Should you forgive them, knowing they were drunk, or are you justified to judge them?

Depends on the incident.
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Wocambs
Posts: 1,505
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1/2/2015 9:41:55 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 1/1/2015 10:22:06 AM, Defro wrote:
Should we judge our friends for what they have done while drunk?
Many people think we shouldn't judge one's actions while intoxicated, but isn't there a line that can't be crossed?
What if what they did while drunk makes you extremely upset? Should you forgive them, knowing they were drunk, or are you justified to judge them?

You aren't a damned alcoholic for being drunk. I get drunk all the time and do plenty of 'dumb' things, but I've done similar things while completely sober. Drunkenness is obviously a factor in explaining why you did something but it isn't an excuse, unless you're so sh*tfaced that you have no idea what is happening. I've seen someone become so confused he thought he was under attack, which I suppose went some way to excusing him for punching his friend.
AnDoctuir
Posts: 11,060
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1/2/2015 9:46:11 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
One of my buddies got so drunk one time, when he tried to walk, he kept getting more and more horizontal, until finally he was pretty much a missile lol.....and wrecked the side of fancy car driving by with his head.

F*ck, that one's kinda frightening too thinking back on it. Was funny trying to talk the dude back into the car without him seeing the damage though.
AnDoctuir
Posts: 11,060
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1/2/2015 9:52:35 AM
Posted: 1 year ago
I get what Wocambs is saying too about blind drunkenness, but once you figure out how given we are to exposing ourselves to certain feelings in a bid to deal with them, you'll never look at it the same again. I'm not sure I believe in utterly blind drunkenness, to be honest.
zmikecuber
Posts: 4,093
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1/2/2015 2:27:39 PM
Posted: 1 year ago
At 1/2/2015 9:15:57 AM, YYW wrote:
At 1/1/2015 10:22:06 AM, Defro wrote:
Should we judge our friends for what they have done while drunk?

It depends what they've done. There are some things I might forgive... other things I wouldn't.

If I told someone something in confidence, and they broke that confidence while drunk, I would probably not forgive that.

If someone was drunk and they went on a psychotic rant/rampage that hurt me or others where what they did was decidedly malicious, I wouldn't forgive that either.

Many people think we shouldn't judge one's actions while intoxicated, but isn't there a line that can't be crossed?

There is a line, and people who think that being drunk excuses shitty behavior are wrong. You are 100% responsible for all the things you do whether drunk or sober.


THIS^

What if what they did while drunk makes you extremely upset? Should you forgive them, knowing they were drunk, or are you justified to judge them?

Depends on the incident.
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